the future of the trolls headcannon

rust bloods: Aradia (and davpeta, sollux, vriska) come back eventually and gives her dna to the new mother grub, the new rust bloods have longer life spans, wings, and minor time powers thanks to Aradia achieving god tier (this goes for everyone else too)

bronze bloods: all of tavrosprite’s offspring are part cat and have blue skin but have legs and still have bronze blood and the powers that come with that blood type but also have crazy space powers thanks to God cat. (they eventually gain the resilience to their allergies to themselves)

gold bloods: sollux’s offspring are fine. their just like sollux before he was doomed.

mutant bloods: karkat’s descendants are fine and good and happy.

lime bloods: through ectobiology we get the lime bloods back.

olive bloods: all of davpeta’s offspring are intersex and have wings and flashing green and orange skin but still have olive blood.

jade bloods: all of Kanaya’s offspring are rainbow drinkers and have glowing skin.

turquoise bloods: terezi’s descendants are fine and happy.

cerulean bloods: vriska’s offspring have wings, can fly, have longer lifespans, and minor powers over fortune.

indigo bloods: Equius/AR sprite’s offspring are born with working biological computers inside their heads and have red skin but still have indigo colored blood and legs.

purple bloods: the trolls agree that they shouldn’t further the purple blood’s line.

violet bloods: violet bloods are are brought back trough ecto biology

fuchsia bloods: same as violet bloods

Let's kill inane "(in)security questions"

After last week’s revelation of a record-smashing breach at Yahoo (which the company covered up for years), security researcher Matt Blaze tweeted: “Sorry, but if you have a Yahoo account, you will need to find a new mother, and have grown up on a different street.” Ha, ha, only serious.

Yahoo is just one of many companies that use “pre-registered knowledge tokens” (AKA security questions) for password recovery, insisting that you give out unchangeable, often easy-to-research personal information that can be abused to take over your account. These make for really bad authentication systems, because good auth systems don’t reuse tokens between services (your mother has one maiden name, meaning that a leak of that fact – which is a public record! – gives attackers access to every service that asks this question); and they can be changed if they’re compromised (you need a time machine to change your mother’s maiden name).

There’s an obvious, not-great answer to this: just make up nonsense answers, preferably containing the ingredients of a good password (length, unpronounceable characters, absence from any real or machine-generated dictionary), for every service. In other words, a signup for a service turns into: “Please supply a password, and another password, and another password, and another password, etc etc” and then remember which password you gave for which service.

The paranoid among us (ahem) have been using this system for years, but it’s by no means perfect. For example, my neighborhood credit union presents its security questions as multiple choice, something I didn’t realize when I was setting up the account. It also thinks that it’s never seen my browser before on every login (because some combination of the privacy, ad-blocking, script-blocking and cookie-blocking tools I use frustrates its first-line security measures). That means that every login involves answering one of these security questions, which ends up looking like this:

What color was your first car?

[ ] White

[ ] Black

[ ] Blue

[ ] Red

[ ] Silver

[ ] White

[ ] 5jLuHY<5WeU

This makes me well up with the cassandrafreude every time I see it.

  • Mum:I think I want to watch that series you were watching a few weeks ago
  • Me:Which one?
  • Mum:It was something like 'orphan is the new black'
  • Me:That's two separate shows
  • Mum:No
  • there was a one with dark hair in glasses that you thought was hot
  • and i'm pretty sure she was a lesbian
  • because she was going out with that blonde lady
  • Me:That still could be either show
  • Mum:I think there were clones
  • Me:There we go.

Pantone Smoothies by Hedvig Astrom Kushner 

Hedvig is  an Art Director at Mother New York and she started this fun little project in the beginning of the summer (non commissioned). She makes a lot of smoothies and discovered it works like mixing paint. Add raspberries, get a hot pink hue, add tofu and the color gets softened. 

All the recipes are very healthy and mostly vegan and what’s even greater, you can follow the instructions to create your own Pantone Smoothies. The project was done in collaboration with photographer Michael Kushner. The pics are all taken in the office basement at Mother, on colored paper in a light box. 

what was chara laughing at?

(undertale spoilers)

one of the biggest mysteries in undertale is finding the explanation for chara’s inexplicable fits of laughter during inappropriate moments. why would chara laugh off asgore’s buttercup poisoning? why do they laugh at snowdrake’s mother?

to answer these questions, the other instances of chara laughing must be examined. does chara have a pattern of laughing nervously? or do they find these situations funny? (this analysis takes the narrachara theory into account.)

pacifist route: true lab / tape 3

in the tapes, asriel says he and chara accidentally put buttercups in a pie instead of cups of butter. this mistake caused asgore to fall terribly ill and made toriel “really upset.” asriel felt horrible about it, but chara “laughed it off.” 

now, this “laugh” may not have been one of amusement, but rather chara brushing off the incident as nothing to worry about. while this laugh could be either cruel or nervous, asriel’s phrasing implies it is instead dismissive. if that is the case, this example is too cryptic to say anything certain about chara’s sense of humor. it would only mean they did not find the incident particularly alarming. instead, one must look at the other times chara is seen to be laughing.

genocide route: hotland / fight with the royal guards

upon checking RG01 in the genocide route, the text is notably in first person. considering the text later in new home, first person text clearly represents chara’s thoughts and actions. 

more interesting is what occurs upon checking RG02. at the thought of both of the royal guards dying together, even knowing how they love each other, chara responds in a peculiar way: “i couldn’t stop laughing.” 

although the royal guards’ checks are a direct quote from a book (“kitchen” by banana yoshimoto), toby fox has stated that references must be able to be taken within the context of the game, in case the player is not familiar with the source.

if the quote is taken at face value, that means there is at least one occasion where chara is shown laughing at the tragic fate of two other people. not only will their love “end in hell,” but chara seems to encourage this tragedy.

pacifist route: true lab / fight with snowdrake’s mother

the genocide route provides evidence that chara is capable of speaking through white text. RG02′s check proves that chara is capable of speaking in the middle of battle. so it makes sense that the second person text is also chara’s narration.

if this is true, it seems that chara finds the amalgamate’s existence to be funny. this narration is triggered if the player chooses to “laugh” from the ACT menu. it’s important to note that in the pacifist route, chara has no influence over frisk’s body because the kill count is at zero. so even if chara finds the situation funny and expects frisk to laugh as well, frisk doesn’t find anything funny about it. despite the player’s input and chara’s narration, frisk does not find it funny and does not laugh.

choosing to laugh a second time will prompt chara to acknowledge that frisk is not amused by snowdrake’s mother’s existence. however, that did not prevent chara from laughing the first time.

choosing to heckle snowdrake’s mother will prompt an even more cruel response. this seems to cement the idea that chara really was laughing at an existence they found to be pathetic. again, chara realises that frisk never said anything like that, but chara still thought it themself.

if the above is the case with snowdrake’s mother, it proves that even without kills chara can still offer a cruel response. this contradicts the theory that the player “corrupts” chara. rather, this appears to be chara’s default response when witnessing the pain of others, regardless of the route the player chooses.

important note: a common counterpoint is that this particular laugh could actually be nervous laughter. while this is certainly plausible – after all, laughter is a common coping mechanism – the context seems to imply this is not the case.

genocide route: the dog food in the lab

there is something else that chara finds amusing – they quite literally call it funny. although laughter can be interpreted in many different ways (such as nervousness or anxiety), something being described as outright “funny” is harder to question. this is in regards to the dog food in alphys’ lab. 

this text is not exclusive to the genocide route. in fact, it can be triggered without entering the genocide route at all. the trigger for the “something funny” dialogue is the following:

all of the dogs in snowdin (doggo, lesser dog, dogamy, dogaressa, greater dog) must die AND the total kill count must be at least 21.
(video proof)

things that don’t trigger this dialogue, only giving the “half-empty” message without the “something funny” message:

  • in a neutral route, kill only doggo (and none of the other snowdin dogs) and then enough monsters to bring the total kill count to 21
  • begin a genocide route and kill nothing after toriel
  • begin a genocide route, kill toriel, and kill only one dog in snowdin
  • in a neutral route, kill 21+ monsters but no snowdin dogs

(for more specifics about the dog food, please see this post.)

“something funny” will only be remembered if 21 monsters are killed, including the whole snowdin canine unit. as a result, it cannot be referring to the amalgamates (this text can be seen before doing a pacifist route) and since there’s a dependency on the dogs’ deaths, it cannot refer to something innocent. because this dialogue always appears in the genocide route – which is associated with chara’s control – it’s reasonable to conclude it is chara who finds the dogs’ deaths “funny.”

in undertale, “you” doesn’t always refer to frisk – the snowdrake’s mother situation above is an example of this. while the narration says “you said”, it quickly reveals those thoughts don’t match frisk’s behaviour; it is more likely that the “you” actually describes chara’s thoughts. in the case of the dog food, if the “you” here isn’t chara, then frisk is the one who finds the deaths funny, which seems out of character. instead, it’s reasonable to presume the “you” is a case of projecting, similar to what chara does when heckling snowdrake’s mother.

pacifist route: soulless pacifist ending

the “soulless pacifist route” is a pacifist route completed after a successful genocide route. it occurs after chara is given “your soul” in the abyss. nothing changes in the soulless pacifist route… until the very end.

if the choice “i have places to go” is selected and frisk does not stay with toriel, an altered photo is shown after the credits.

instead of frisk standing with all their friends, chara is seen smiling with everyone’s faces crossed out. it’s implied that chara, without any help from the player, has murdered (or intends to murder) them all. during this, music from the genocide route plays in the background (a slowed version of “anticipation”).

on the other hand, if frisk stays with toriel, frisk is shown sleeping in their new bed while toriel leaves some pie for them. once toriel leaves, frisk spins around – but it’s not actually frisk.

after chara’s eye glints, the screen goes black. during this darkness, a laugh can be heard. this laugh is a pitched down version of flowey’s laugh, but only chara is in the room. chara is laughing. after the laugh, the player is greeted with “the end” in chara’s red text. once again, a slowed version of “anticipation” can be heard, mirroring the other ending.

what happens next is not shown, but because it’s heavily implied that chara kills frisk’s friends in the ending with the photo, it’s reasonable to assume chara has the same intentions in the ending with toriel. this means chara laughs out loud with the intent to kill. this cannot be nervous laughter or a panicked response due to circumstances they cannot control (i.e., the player forcing them to kill) as they choose this ending all on their own.

genocide route: erasing the world

there’s another instance of chara laughing that isn’t shown through text or sound – it’s visual. 

if the player decides not to go along with chara in erasing the world by selecting the “do not” option provided, chara will let the player know that either they aren’t the one “IN CONTROL” (or that the player “MADE [THEIR] CHOICE LONG AGO”). immediately afterwards, the jumpscare occurs. chara attempts to terrify the player with a distorted, horrific expression. 

this scene uses three particular sprites…

“spr_truechara_laugh.” chara is laughing. if the movements weren’t clear, the file names for chara’s jumpscare sprites prove it. when the player attempts to defy chara, chara laughs and destroys "this world.” 

genocide route: flowey’s story

just prior to the fight with sans, at the conclusion of flowey’s story, flowey suddenly becomes terrified of chara. 

most likely, flowey’s fear is a result of chara’s change in demeanour after hearing the “creatures like us” lines. flowey tells chara to “back off”, but chara proceeds anyway.

although it’s not seen, chara apparently makes a “creepy face”. it’s unknown what this exact expression is, but flowey gives us a hint.

flowey wouldn’t feel the need to say that “this isn’t funny” unless chara actually looked like they found something funny. maybe chara is laughing. maybe they’re not. they probably look entertained or amused, at the very least. either way, flowey heavily implies that chara finds his fear “funny”.

then there’s the line that summarises the key to chara’s laughter, the line that explains why chara laughs inappropriately and finds tragic situations funny: flowey states that chara has “a SICK sense of humor”.

given what examples are present in the game, it’s suggested that chara finds the suffering of others amusing. they laugh off asgore’s illness. they laugh before killing both royal guards. they laugh at snowdrake’s mother’s painful life and describe it as “SO funny.” the dog food brings up a “funny” memory, dependent on the deaths of the canine unit. chara laughs at the very end of the soulless pacifist route, with the intent to murder frisk’s friends. they laugh before destroying the world in the genocide route, when the player attempts to resist. finally, it’s implied that chara finds flowey’s fear of death “funny” – and flowey even says himself that chara has “a SICK sense of humor.”

asriel, who knew chara better than anyone, said it best: