new-couches

Sunday Confessions

Watching “The Patriot” (Mel not Steven) but mainly just to see what kind of curtains they had.

Still moving furniture all around the house all because we brought a new couch and chair home. “There. Well, now this doesn’t look right there. Let’s move this too. And now this. There. No wait…”

Went out for drinks with the neighbors last night. Was fine til we went back to their house. At some point during the night we switched from tequila to vodka. My stomach is most displeased with me today.

The Mr is making steak kebabs for dinner. I made a marinade for the beef. Oh. My. Gawd. So good I could drink it with a straw.

Back to school tomorrow. Back to work too. I’m no more happy about that than the kids.

Local Cat Worried She Might be a Cliché

A local cat named Nala is terrified that she might be a cliché, according to friends. The cat reportedly can’t resist sitting in boxed, has twice scratched up a new couch, goes “bonkers” when she hears the can opener, and sleeps at least ninety percent of the day.

“She’s really concerned that she’s become rather unoriginal and boring,” said Astrid Kasongo, a close friend and confidant. “I think she’s fighting her own nature, though. She legit can’t stop herself from sitting in an open box.”

The cat worries that her rather banal behavior might hurt her lifelong aspiration to become a successful Broadway actress. 

“Stage producers are looking for a certain spark of originality that Nala knows is within her,” said Kasongo. “She’s just really worried they won’t be able to see if she shows up to an audition and immediately begins playing with her costars’ shoelaces and chasing laser pointer lights.”

Via nala_cat.

Quand je pensais pouvoir voir le combat de Sarah Ourahmoune à la TV mais qu’apparemment enfin avoir une femme qualifiée pour les JO en boxe c’est pas assez cool pour passer à la TV … 

When I thought I could watch Sarah Ourahmoune’s fight on TV but apparently having a woman qualified for the Olympic Games in boxing isn’t enough to be on TV …

Klaus Mikaelson & Elijah Mikaelson - Changing Perceptions

Prompt: Hey! This will probably be a lengthy request (sorry) but do you think you could please write a klaus x reader request please? Where you are his human girlfriend and Elijah doesn’t approve/like you and you know that so in turn you are sassy to him and klaus finds it hilarious. Then one day klaus and Elijah have to deal with a problem (aka lucien) and Elijah comes back dragging an injured klaus who was stabbed with the stake. So you being a nurse take over and take it out and jokingly say “Niklaus, you owe me a new couch” and like kiss his forehead and Elijah kinda watches and realises your relationship is strong because klaus is really affectionate to you. Bonus: if you manage to somehow include the reader being a bitch and punching lucien because she is over his crap. Don’t have to include it if you can’t. That’s all good! :) Thank you! 

You had been waiting for a while for them to return. Every part of you knew it was a terrible idea, the worst idea that both Klaus and Elijah had come up with in a while. They’d gone to fight Lucien. You’d hoped they’d come back quickly, realising that you had been right and they were stupid. But of course, that wouldn’t happen because the Mikaelsons were too stupid to realise that they were stupid. Klaus was your boyfriend so you expected the stupidity from him because he was well, him. Elijah was supposed to be the smart one. 

You’d thought that he left with Klaus just because you’d said it was a bad idea. Elijah didn’t like you very much, if at all. It could be due to the fact that you were constantly at him, sassing him for everything he said, being sarcastic and snapping at him. Klaus found it hilarious… Elijah, not so much. In your defence though, he didn’t like you even before that. He didn’t approve of you and his brother together. You’d thought that it was because you were human and Klaus was so far from but you didn’t really know. 

 You’d started to pace when you heard a groan from the doorway. You frowned, rushing towards the sound and stopping when you saw the brothers. Elijah was dragging Klaus next to him, your boyfriend bleeding excessively, leaving a trail behind him that you’d no doubt have to clean up later. You rushed back over to the couch, clearing it of cushions as Elijah placed Klaus down. Your boyfriend lay down dramatically, his hand shooting to the stake protruding from his chest.

 "Lucien staked him.“ Elijah explained gruffly. You rolled you eyes, sitting on Klaus so your knees were either side of him. 

"Really? I wouldn’t have noticed.” You replied dryly. Klaus managed a chuckle, blood coughing up as he did. You sighed, smoothing his hair down and not breaking eye contact as you rested your knee on his chest and used your other hand to pull out the stake. He gasped as the wood left his chest, the wound closing up before you’d even fished out the whole stake. 

You smiled at Klaus, throwing the stake on the floor next to you. As you got up, you pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. He grabbed your hand before you could go, smiling up at you. 

“Thank you, love.” You grinned back. 

“It’s not a problem.” You replied before frowning. “Though you do owe me a new couch, Niklaus.” Elijah watched the interaction with narrowed eyes. Maybe you weren’t as bad as he thought you were. He barely registered you talking to him as he watched his brother’s face, full of adoration as he looked at you. 

“Where’s Lucien now?” You inquired, not looking at Elijah considering your rocky relationship. 

“Freya is disposing of him. He’s weakened, she just needs to find a spell to kill him” He responds without the usual bite. You kissed Klaus on the forehead before starting for the door, rolling up your sleeves. 

“Where are you going?” Klaus asked, sitting up. 

“Lucien needs a lesson the human way. I’m sure he won’t mind a black eye in his grave.” You replied before leaving. If you hadn’t have known better, you would’ve said that you saw a small smile on Elijah’s face before you left.

[[ @ask-sans because we’re basically done with where the title is useful ]]

It didn’t take long for Frisk to disappear, once they reached the castle. Frisk had stayed there once, and knew his way around. A few minutes of awkward silence later and Chris also disappeared, leaving Sans to nap on the couch.

It was a nice couch. New, or Sans thought it was new, anyway. 

He woke up to find Frisk- old Frisk, human Frisk, a fifteen year old whose legs were too long for his body, without the scars of two years of fighting, with eyes mostly shut and a big smile- standing over him. Sure, he was wearing one of Toriel’s old robes, but given that the options otherwise involved the undersized clothes in the Prince’s wardrobe and the much too large ones Asgore owned, it wasn’t the worst choice.

Hell, it even looked okay on him. Sort of.

“Hey. Wake up, sleepy bones.”

This has easily been the most fun tour. I’m excited/nervous to get home. Things always change when I come home. My friends are doing new things, my dog will be bigger, my parents will be busy, my apartment will have a new couch, and I’ll still be the same guy. It’s cool and sucky at the same time because I really want to hold onto the good things in my life when I leave for tour, but they are always different when I come home.
—  Joe Trohman, 2004

9 more days until I turn 26.

I had planned to commit suicide the day before my 26th birthday and had even written and drafted a suicide note to be published that day explaining where I had gone and how long my queue was set up for.

Right now I’m resting on my new couch in my new house listening to Amy Winehouse while my loving, doting partner mills around unpacking and dancing, smiling every time she sees me. We’re preparing to go back to the old house in my new car to sleep one last time before the movers come to take our bed to our new house tomorrow afternoon.

I’m actually looking forward to my birthday. My mom is going to take me and my partner out to a fancy dinner the weekend before, since my birthday is on a Monday. People are buying me housewarming gifts.

I can’t imagine dying any time soon.

Prompt ideas

So, i decided to make a whole list of prompts ‘nd stuff like that for future use (if you guys want me to) @softheirofrage this is also for you……****

Roommates
1) Person A comes home to find Person B jacking off in their living room.
- “Hey ___ , I forgot to grab my ke- WHAT IN GOD’S NAME ARE YOU DOING ON MY NEW COUCH!”

2) Person A has to hide their favorite snacks in their room because person B has a habit of eating everything in sight.
-“This is the last time I let that fucker touch my oreos.” Person A mutters bitterly while placing their snack bag under the bed.

3) Person A is a single parent who has recently lost their job and, as a result, their house. The only person who they could think of to take their child is Person B, which also happens to be someone that they hate.
- “I appreciate you for doing this for me. I only need a couple of weeks and then we’ll both be out of your hair.” “Relax. I may not like you all that much but I’m not gonna let an innocent child starve.”