new life motto i think

Karamel Fanfic Review #2

Mating Season by kelbottumbles and contygold86

Main Notes:
- what. the. fuck.
- you’re all furries (if it wasn’t clear before, it is now)
- this is not even close to being “a pretty epic fic”
- but bonus points for over emotional!mon-el crying when kara kicked him out
- more bonus points for not posting it on fanfiction.net
- also kara not caring about protected sex while mon-el actually caring about it is the most unrealistic and disgusting thing i’ve ever read
- your animal similes are WILD (pls tame them): “Like an animal driven on instinct,” “so full of built up tension like a coiled snake,” “like a feral cat”
- damn you were right tho- “wild!Kara is genuinely off her rocker”

Memorable Quotes:
Chapter 1 (almost sexy times bc of a broken condom)
- she found him crying over two pieces of blackened toast
- they’d launched themselves at each other, charcoal toast flying
- he was becoming more and more wild and unrestrained. Like a feral cat.
- Kara had been feeling so befuddled by her urges
- it had to be harder. Ferocious
- “GRIFE!” Mon-El cursed (when the condom broke. then he proceeded to angrily throw kara across the room and against the wall)
- earth condoms couldn’t hold up to the kind of superpowered sex they’d been having recently
- Mon-El threw his head back and exclaimed, it was part snarl, part growl, part groan. He looked like he was in pain.

Chapter 2 (the time kara and mon-el almost fucked in the middle of the deo)
- a wave of primal libidinous rage
- Kara had one mission as she started her day: Fix it. Find Mon-El. Fornicate.
- the second he saw her, smelled her… the transformation from man to beast was complete.
- He was pure instinct
- Kara silenced the room with a wild banshee shriek before swinging at the Martian

Chapter 3 (kara and mon-el get drugged and locked up)
- the urge, the desire, the primal need, the cosmic force

Rating:
Title: 2/10 they’re aliens, not animals you goddamn furries (gross but at least you have a title)
Writing: 3/10 half asses writing with several attempted uses of big words but +1 bonus for similes relevant to the title
Overall: 2.5/10! congrats you all need serious help

Final Notes:
- more accurate sex than the other (@winelover1989 take notes!)
- it’s clear you have more than just daddy kinks
- i have a new life motto: “The 3 F’s: Fix it. Find him. Fornicate!”

It’s terrible, but I’m terrible, so it’s fine. We can be terrible together in our own little hole forever.
— 

Jimmy Whetzel (Sonic Adventure 2 Review)

I think I found my new life motto.