I am done. I’m so done with the life as I know it.
I don’t want to drink anymore, I don’t want to party anymore.
I don’t want meaningless conversations with strangers, and I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars on a weekend for feeling depressed and sad.
I don’t want to lie to my friends and parents, and act happy all the time. I don’t want to cry all night, and look like a zombie all day.
I don’t want to care about drinking, and get excited about drugs more than anything else in my life.
I just don’t want to love things that kill me slowly, and hurt me. I don’t want to be attracted to damaged and fucked up.
I don’t want to love things that deserve hate.
Not anymore, not in this lifetime. I want better for myself. I know I deserve better for myself. I know I am better.
- Hedonist Poet