new askbox

New In Town Starters

“I don’t look older, I just look worse.”

“I always thought quicksand was gonna be a much bigger problem than it turned out to be”

“if you watch cartoons, quicksand is like the third biggest thing you have to worry about in adult life behind real sticks of dynamite and anvils falling on you from the sky.”

“I think I’m becoming more like my mom. I was watching Access Hollywood, and one of the reporters said ‘up next we have and exclusive interview with Sandra Bullock’s former husband, Jesse James.’ And out loud I went ‘uhg! This oughta be good!’”

“One time I was in bed and my dad came in and said ‘good night (name) did you brush your teeth?’ And I said ‘yes’ but here’s the thing… I hadn’t.”

“If the court reporter reads back my remarks you will see that I did not purger myself.”

“She would just make wild accusations all day long and wait for something to stick.”

“My mom would blame me for things that happened on the news. That is true.”

“(Name) I have been here all night! You can feel the tv, it’s warm.”

“Luckily I had a good alibi because I was in Wisconsin and twelve.”

“My brothers and sisters and I had this babysitter when we were kids and I was in love with her.”

“Why was she in charge?!”

“That’s just like hiring a slightly bigger child.”

“That would be like if you were going out of town for the week and you paid a horse to watch your dog.”

“Why do people shush animals? They’ve never spoken.”

“This is the height of luxury!”

“Lost in New York? The streets are numbered! How did you get lost in New York?”

“It’s a grid system motherfucker. Where you at? 24th and 5th? Where you wanna go? 35th and 6th? 11 up and 1 over you simple bitch.”

“When I was in grade school I was bullied for being Asian American and… the biggest problem with that… is that I am not Asian american.”

“On the first day that he met me, the guy that is now my best friend went home and said ‘papa, today I met a boy with no eyes’ and that was me.”

“Thirteen year olds are the meanest people in the world. They terrify me to this day.”

“8th graders will make fun of you but in an accurate way.”

“No! that’s the thing I’m sensitive about!”

“First off: no.”

“If you’re comparing the badness of two words and you won’t even say one of them, that’s the worse word.”

“Midgets were never enslaved! Unless you count the Wonka factory!”

“It was really easy to get away with murder before they knew about DNA.”

“Here’s how easy it was to get away with bank robbery back in the 30s: as long as you weren’t still there when the police arrived, you had a 99% chance of getting away with it.”

“Oh good it has a mind of its own, that’s very reassuring.”

“It’s 100% easier not to do things, and so much fun not to do them. Especially when you were supposed to do them.”

“In terms of like instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin.”

“I’ve never been killed by hit men, so I don’t know what it’s like in the moments right before you’re killed by hit men, but I bet it’s not unlike when you’re on the subway and you realize that a mariachi band is about to start playing.”

“It doesn’t have to be right, it just has to be short.”

“A hero is any man that does his job.”

“A bozo is any man that cheats on his wife.”

“I went into the room to get the massage and the woman there told me to undress to my comfort level. So I put on a sweater and a pair of corduroy pants, and I felt safe.”

“Hey mister! I found your treasure!”

“If I got a plate of crack for the table would you have some?”

“I have a girlfriend now myself, which is weird because I’m probably gay, based on how I act and behave and have walked and talked for 28 years.”

“I think I was supposed to be gay. I think in heaven they built like three quarters of a gay person and they forgot to flip the final switch and just sent me out.”

“Everyone get out of my way! I just wanna sit here and feed my birds.”

“You want me to do what?”

“We’ve been going pretty hot and heavy lately, I think it’s time we brought in two older catholic people.”

“I listen to everything my girlfriend says. I don’t mean she bosses me around, I just mean that before I had a girlfriend, I never had someone who was always standing next to me and could just point out obvious things that are happening.”

“I don’t look like someone who used to do anything.”

“Oh hey, (name), would you like an old turnip we found in a cabinet? Would that be good for you? Would you like that? I know you don’t drink!”

“I’m really sorry about last night, I was just so drunk.”

“I’m really sorry about last night, it’s just that I’m mean and loud. It probably will happen again.”

“I don’t drink anymore because I used to drink too much and I would black out and ‘ruin parties’ –or so I’m told.”

“ I was 20 and I was at a party at someone’s house and I blacked out drinking and someone came out of one of the rooms at this party holding an old antique bottle with some liquid in it and they said ‘hey, is this whiskey or perfume?’ And apparently I grabbed it, drank all of it and said ‘it’s perfume.’ And it was.”

“(name) was an asshole and one weekend he and his wife decided to leave town, which you should never do if you’re an asshole.”

“Okay, lets go over there and destroy the place.”

“I walked into this party, everyone I had ever met was there and everyone was drinking like it was the end of the world.”

“People were drinking like it was the civil war and a doctor was coming to saw our legs off.”

“They had a pool table in the basement, one kid got a running start and threw his body onto the pool table and broke it in half.”

“I’m standing in the basement and I’m holding a red cup - you’ve seen movies - and I’m starting to black out. And I guess someone said like ‘something something police’ and in a brilliant moment of word association, I shouted ‘FUCK DUH POLICE’ and everyone else joined in. A hundred white, drunk children yelling ‘fuck. duh. police’ with the confidence of guys that have like already been to jail and aren’t afraid of it anymore.”

“My friend – who is now a father, this man now has a baby – grabbed a 40, smashed it on the ground and yelled ‘SCATTER!’ And everyone ran in different directions.”

“I ran into the laundry room and hopped up onto the washing machine and climbed out a window into the back yard and I’m running through the back yard and there’s this huge chain link fence and I thought ‘I have never climbed a fence that high before!’ And then I woke up and home.“

“And I said ‘no’ you know, like a liar.”

“And I had that thought, that only black out drunks and Steve Urkel can have: did I do that? I figured no, I wouldn’t have done that, but I was never sure.”

“he takes me into his bedroom and then he takes me into a side room off of his bedroom- never a good thing to have.”

“WHY? WHY DO YOU DO THIS?”

“Because it’s the one thing you can’t replace.”

“That’s the end of that story but how fucked up is that?”

“I was going into my building late at night and in front of my building I saw a wheel chair knocked over on its side, with no one in it. That’s a bad thing to see. Something happened there, you hope it was a miracle, but probably not.”

“That wasn’t what I was telling you, but alright, let’s talk about this entirely new topic.”

“Excuse me, I am homeless, I am gay, I have AIDS and I’m new in town.”

“That is not the most dramatic thing that you just said.”

“Hey would you help me out? I’m very gay, I’d like a few dollars.”

“Yeah that’s the type of lowbrow shit I’m looking for.”

Love & War. {Feysand}

Originally posted by sensuous

Sorry this took so long for me to post, friends. I had a busy (stressful) week and it caused some writer’s block. Thank you all for voting in my poll, though! Here is the prompt that got the most votes. I love hearing from my readers, and finding new prompts in my askbox. It makes me feel amazing as a writer! 

Warning: This oneshot is equally smutty and adorable.


Where are you?

I shot the question through the bond as I watched Elain. She was sitting across from Azriel as he told her yet another story about Truth-teller. After what had happened with the King of Hybern, Elain had wanted to hear all about the sword, where it had gone with Azriel through the years, and the history it had witnessed. Her small frame was turned towards him, shoulders curved inward as her chin rested in the palm of her hand, her elbow gently placed on her crossed knees. With wide eyes, she clung onto his every word.

The study.

My eyes shifted to where Nesta sat next to Amren in the long chairs outside the sparring ring. My sister was watching the Illyrian intensely, her lips pursed, but her gray-blue eyes longing. Mor and Cassian danced around one another, jokingly, in their fighting leathers. Mor had knocked him on his ass three times in the last hour. He had blamed it on his injuries, claimed he was still healing.

Mor had claimed she was going easy on him for the same reason.

Your missing out on Cassian getting beat up by Mor, I heard him laugh through the bond as I continued, it’s pretty amusing. And also a little bit sad.

He deserves it, he replied, amusingly. I miss you.

Keep reading

the-last-alicorn  asked:

Can we just take a moment to reflect on how ingenious the formula for the Kamen Rider/Super Sentai series is? Each season is effectively a reboot that last for a year, with a definite tonal and design shift for each season so that you'll never get bored with the premise and you'll always check out the next season to see if you'll like it better. Plus all the merchandise. Theoretically, Toei could keep these series running FOREVER. That is just insane to me. Awesome, but insane.

It’s something you really wouldn’t see in the US, where continuity matters so much.  It’s also amazing because it means there are NEVER breaks between seasons. Because they are different shows with different actors and different directors and people working on them, you can have the next series in production while the one before it is still airing. 

Contrast that with an American or even British production where there are huge gaps between seasons to accommodate time off needed for the actors, writers and producers. You would never see a series (aside from a game show or news program) running continuously year after year, one seasons starting right after the other.  Especially not a scripted sci-fi/fantasy series heavy on effects.

However, thanks to the format of Kamen Rider/Super Sentai you do have that in Japan.  When one series ends, another starts the week after.  You don’t really get a break and it actually creates a kind of interest months before the new show starts.  Heck, I was so psyched when the NAME Uchuu Sentai Kyuranger got leaked with what the possibilities might be for the next show even while I was still very much enjoying Dobutsu Sentai Zyuohger

I bet all of us fans get at least a little excited when we start hears rumors about what’s coming next or see the initial designs for a new series.  We also know that it will be coming so soon once those start to be revealed. It’s also a great marketing idea because if you, for some reason, don’t enjoy the current series you just have to wait a little while and something NEW will come along. It creates a lot less drop off than if, say, the current season of NCIS is crap and you have to wait through reruns and a huge break before you get more of the same with the same characters and same writers.  There is something to be said for that constant renewal you get with Japanese tokusatsu series.

4

I’m also for some weird reason 100% convinced Sakusa listens to death metal

anonymous asked:

Hello! I hope you are having a good day. I am very interested in witchcraft, and I want to initiate in it, but I do not know how. Can you recommend me some books to read about it or maybe some practices I should start doing? Thank you! I really like your blog.

Where do I start in witchcraft?

Do I start with books?

Unfortunately, I do not have books to recommend for you, first because none of the books I found resonated with me practice wise ( I read lots of crap) and second because I don’t know what are your beliefs, or what kind of practice you are interested in ( if you know already).
I would start by that, looking at the practices that speak to you ( for example: do you want your witchcraft practice to also be religious or not?do you Want to work with nature? Elements? Etc). You do not have to define tour practice precisely right now, of course, but it will at least give you a direction to go to.

… or internet?

I found that the internet is a great source of information when you want to learn about something, and you can easily search for the different types of Witchcraft there, read articles and blogs about it, and in the end ( super important) forge your own opinion! And then, it might be worth buying books that will really fit what you want your practice to be!

And then what?

Once you have an idea where to go, you can start collecting information on the practice/aspect of witchcraft you are interested in: visualization, herbs, crystals,planets, etc. The internet, books, blogs, your own intuition, the sources are many!

Don’t be afraid to ask questions! But also, don’t be afraid to use Google. A question like “what is moon water”, “what is lavender associated with”, etc, can be easily answered with a quick Google search. I promise.

And don’t believe everything someone tells you. There is not one way to do things and one only! It is all about what works for you!

And once informed, having all the tools in hand, you can start working on spells!
Growing your practice, maybe changing direction, adding new aspects to it,etc. For example, I discovered sea witchcraft years after practicing… and it instantly clicked in me, and I added this aspect to my practice!

A few blogs you may want to follow:

@witchy-woman : a great witch and human being, very informative and she posts beginner friendly witchy jars instructions, with ingredients you can find in your daily life!

@violetwitchcraft : loads of informative posts on this blog

@cunningcelt : another very informative blog, with an owner that will not be afraid to bring you back to reality with a bit of sass (which I love), and their grimoire photos are gorgeous!

@natural-magics : even if Jenna is not very often active due to life, her blog is like a huge online grimoire: tons of spells of all kind, and a lot of easy ones!

@magic-for-the-masses : Richtor creates the best witchcraft masterpost1s you can dream of and also have tons of spells and beginner friendly content listed

And what is on mine?

You can start by looking what I have in my witchcraft 101 tag, as well as the basics one, made just for beginners. You may also find some easy things to start with in my witchy tips tag ;)

Then, you have my navigation page, that will link you to all the different spells and correspondences you can find on my blog, as well as the different aspect of my practice :)

Finally… some posts to read:

And my askbox is always open ;)

HI Y’ALL, I am still alive. All those times before when I was like “oh I’m so busy I cannot update this tumblr ~woe is me~” were just malingering! But in the meanwhile, here is my intelligent review of the latest Fast and Furious, a franchise that is near and dear to my heart as it should be to everyone’s hearts. I’ve also had to move laptops in the meanwhile and have lost all programs and presets – drawing anything feels incredibly OFF, which isn’t making this whole “let’s update a tumblr” thing any easier! – but anyway, enough from me, let’s focus on this delightful excuse for a spinoff setup.

LIKE I’M PRETTY SURE SOME PART OF ME WILL NEVER FORGIVE DECKARD SHAW BECAUSE OF HAN BUT ALSO DECKARD SHAW IS JASON STATHAM WITH A BABY BASKET SO?????

canadianwheatpirates  asked:

[crashes in through your skylight] so, assuming you're down, tell us your hc's about root never tying back her hair except as an impersonation tool

Whaaaaat have you done omg my headcanons about this aren’t even fully formed, they’re just vague ideas floating about my head because once I noticed this pattern, I absolutely of-fucking-course had to make up a reason for it.

This was partly inspired by the claim that Amy asked for Root to retain her black nail polish on her toenails even after SAM came online because she wanted to retain some part of what made Root Root. But I have this vague idea that she adopted the long brunette curls as an inseparable part of Root as a way to remember Hanna, and so when she was Root, she made sure to keep that constant. 

Or she could just prefer to have her hair open and so only ties it back when she absolutely has to for a cover, of course…

Noted, Daveed Diggs x Reader

Prompt: First date + Daveed Diggs

Words: 880 (I’ve been writing much more than usual per fic)

Author’s Note: A sort of continuation of ‘Street Cred’. You don’t necessarily have to read that one to understand this one, though!

Warnings: Cursing (what else is new?), drinking (nothing. this is nothing new).

Askbox | Masterlist | Part 1


Daveed was precisely on time for your date. He opted for a very casual look after his busy day and you were very grateful you decided to go with a Golden State Warriors shirt.

He walked in a few minutes after you did, a few of his costars trailing behind him.

“I really hope you don’t mind. It’s actually impossible for them to leave me alone?”

“The more the merrier,” You assured, scooting over in the semi-circular booth so he could take the seat next to you and his friends could slide in on the other side.

He went around the circle, introducing each of them and watching you easily interact with them. You happily joked with Oak, complimented Jazzy on a bracelet she was wearing and was able to send a flirty remark to him all in one breath.

You fit in seamlessly, and when you offered to get the first of many rounds that night, his friends were quick to tell him.

“Shit, man, are you just really good at scoping out girls at coffee shops?” Anthony, who had stayed quiet and observed carefully, asked.

“A Warriors shirt? You’re paying her, right?” Jazzy joked, grinning innocently when you returned with a waiter in tow, who carried a round of shots and beers for the group.

Eventually, Oak’s girlfriend arrived and he spent a better part of the night on the dance floor with her, accompanied by Anthony and Jazzy. This left you alone with Daveed at the booth.

“How was work?” You shifted your body to face him.

“Good, only fucked up a bit. You never told me where you work?” He shifted as well, leaning forward and draping his arm over the back of the booth.

“I live the oh-so glamorous life of a bookstore employee. The Dewey Decimal System gives me a thrill like nothing else can,” You joked, throwing back a shot, wincing when the strong liquid hit the back of your throat.

“I can imagine. Nothing more erotic than a 600 page exploration of a fucking shark or something.” He followed your lead, tossing a shot back casually. You giggled at the thought of the man in front of you sitting down in costume to consume a rousing book about fish.

“Well, it pays the bills. I would like to paint, but who has the time?”

“A painter! You do have the hot, mysterious feeling of a troubled artist…” He trailed off, glancing to where Oak and Anthony had drunkenly decided to start singing along to the blasting music.

“Now, that’s true art.” You laughed when Jazzy decided to join in, harmonizing perfectly even in her tipsy state. You lifted your beer glass, and he clinked his against yours.

You spent the night with Daveed by your side, you shared tidbits and stories of your life, as you really didn’t know much about each other. The end of your date was spent trying to corral his friends into taxis, sending them home as safely as you could.

You told him your apartment building was a few blocks up, and he offered to walk you home. You took him up on his offer, feeling much safer in the dimly lit street with his arm around you.

“They liked you, they might actually like you more than they do me,”

“Well, they have great taste, then.” You teased as you crossed the street onto your block, “This is me.” You pointed up to your building.

“We’re going to do this again, right?” He asked, leaning against the door as you fiddled with your purse in search of your keys to the building.

“I think so.” You found your keys, and twirled them in your fingers as he cleaned closer, “Although, as much as I love getting drunk with the Tony and Grammy award winning cast of Hamilton, I might enjoy getting dinner with Daveed Diggs more.”

“Noted.” He beamed as you unlocked the door. He moved forward to hold the door open for you, but you didn’t move past the archway. You pushed yourself onto your tip-toes, pressing a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“Goodnight.” You whispered, turning on your heel into your building.

Still holding the door open, he had one single thought, ‘Do it, Diggs.’

He caught a hold of your wrist, turning and pulling you into his chest. Without a second thought, he pushed his lips onto yours, having to lean forward to accommodate your height. Again, you pushed forward as far as you could to completely eliminate any and all space between the two of you.

You pulled back breathless, your purse laying forgotten on the floor of the lobby of your apartment building.

“Goodnight.” He replied, giving you one last peck before leaving you stunned. You scrambled to pick up your purse, and climbed the flights of stairs to your floor faster than you ever had before.

You still felt the pressure of his lips the next morning, when he texted you a picture of the sun rising over the skyscrapers of New York with the caption, ‘this reminded me of you’.

You painted it for him and hung it up in your apartment on your one year anniversary. You moved it to the nursery two years later.

*scoots in* yo…i drew this with a MOUSE. And i the OP wuff?……meh

ANYWAYS! YEAH! 1000+ followers! And there’s Swifty’s REAL EYES. And also the BABY! It’s a BOY! (Likes i said before)….My friend who runs @ask-sensy-sonatale suggested the name “Siren” because of the fire! Yes!! BRILLIANT!! I gave Siren a good personality too~

-“Siren is a baby skeleton who is not too curious. Since he is still a baby he can’t walk so he uses his small arms and legs to mover around. Despite he is still a baby he understands English. So despite he understands anything, he’s still a baby so he can be devious and delirious both at the same time. He has a hoodie with short pointy ears. When he’s mad the orange color on his hoodie would burn and turn into fire. Siren can hardly keep up with his brothers at controlling his magic. The magic that he always use often is the ability to speak. Even though it works his magic is still weak so he would talk in a broken English. His older brothers enjoy communicating with him.”

SIREN IS NOW PART OF THE ASK BOX!!!

weeaboosupreme  asked:

do you know about earth warrior zeros? or any other of the other heroes like him?

I didn’t specifically know about Earth Warrior Zeros (地球戦士ゼロス) until you mentioned it and then I looked it up!  I LOVE the costume design!

There are SO MANY independent tokusatsu heroes and Local Heroes that it’s really hard to know them all.  I am still watching Houjin Yatsurugi on youtube (loving it) and I’ve recently learned about Jikuu Senshi IBALIGER so this is kind of a new frontier for modern tokusatsu heroes I am exploring!

Thank You for pointing me in the direction of a new one!