never too old for shit

Things Noel Fielding has inspired me to do: Decide “fuck it” and spend a good portion of my time in the senior bathrooms backcombing my hair and re-applying lipgloss, because if I’m going to be a stressed mess preparing for death, I may as well try get my dream look going while I can and live up the last two months of high school when it’s still vaguely acceptable 

TF drunk headcanons:

Cyclonus smiles

Tailgate likes to arm wrestle everything and dance on tables

Whirl is willing to be arm wrestled. Also slips stronger spirits into others drinks “for free”

Rung will psychoanalyse l o u d l y also for free.

Skids thinks he’s the smoothest ball room dancer. No one, not even the furniture is safe from fancy foot work

Nautica had a REALLY LOUD LAUGH

Rodimus drinks too much too quickly professes his love to everybody, cries, throws up, disappears for half an hour and then reappears with no memory of the last 50 minutes and another drink in his hand

Drift is the one who looks after Rodimus. The designated driver

Ratchet is a miserable fart, doesn’t dance spends the whole night at the bar complaining that he’s too old for this shit.

Megatron a classy drunk, never hungover.

Minimus Ambus has memorised perfectly one dance routine, repeats over and over.

Lace's notebook

I can look so goddamn floral while I give you head darlin. I am an act-or , and musician. I set the scene in a bed scattered with junk yard roses. Whisper sultry symphonies in your ear, of want and need and desperation, and I make you believe that your fingers in my ass means a fucking thing to me… and guess what, I’m goddamn convincing.