never meant to kill

the enemy mccree: kills my entire team by himself, pulls off ten thousand perfect deadeyes a match, says howdy to my stupid corpse while toting his 59348538053% accuracy like a trophy from the county fair

me as mccree: combat rolls off a cliff, misses a dva mech standing right in front of me, accidentally cancels deadeye no less than six times a match, too gay and gets tricked by genji constantly bc he said hello and i responded and he killed me instantly, worst cowboy this side of the mississippi and the other side of the mississippi and basically any orientation in reference to the mississippi, yeehaw weesnaw

Steve: “Buck, stop! You’re going to kill someone!”

Bucky: “Bucky never meant to kill. Bucky only meant to maim or seriously injure.”

My friend and I were talking about Brandon Sanderson the other day and how that man can pump out huge novels like once a year, and we came to startling conclusion that he feeds off the productivity of others starting with Robert Jordan which is why Sanderson finished Wheel of Time for him. He is also the reason its taking GRRM to take another decade to finish Winds of Winter… Sanderson never meant to kill Jordan but now he’s syphoning off of all the other fantasy authors for his own goals.

I miss you and I still think about you a lot. My stomach drops at the thought of you forgetting me and finding someone else. But I know that you are slowly forgetting me, everyday you forget my laugh a little bit more but I’m forgetting you too and it’s terrifying because I don’t want to ever forget anything about you. It’s killing me because I know we were never meant to be and that you leaving should have made me realise that you were a liar and a coward but I don’t want to forget your smile, I want us to start over and do everything right, no mistakes. I want to rewind to when everything wasn’t so messy but I can’t and it’s killing me.
—  it’s too late for us now but I really wish it wasn’t.

anonymous asked:

So I'm currently rewatching S5, and one thing that is still bugging me is how the hell did Lucifer know, from the beginning, that Sam's gonna say yes to him in Detroit exactly? I mean he was pretty certain about it the whole time, and all I can think about is some kind of 'prophecy', like the way everyone knew since the start of the Creation that "it's all gonna end with Sam and Dean", as them being the vessels, but it still seems unlikely. Or is it a special bond kinda thing? What do you think?

META TIME. AGAIN. 

This one is something I’ve always been extremely curious about, myself. Lucifer speaks to Sam with such certainty, from the moment they meet, it seems impossible to deny that their fate was some prophesized phenomenon. 

So let’s start there. To me, this ^ little line is Lucifer telling Sam, essentially, “This is exactly how things are meant to be. Any doubts that I had - any fear of my savior being no more than a broken promise - all of that was gone the moment you unlocked the door.” He believes in Sam because Sam has already proven himself. 

And then Lucifer further demonstrates his faith in this “plan” by actually apologizing to Sam for things that haven’t happened yet. 

He already understands that Sam is going to suffer - not because he is Lucifer’s True Vessel, necessarily, but because he knows how the human is going to struggle with this knowledge. He knows because he, too, is struggling. Lucifer doesn’t want this - not really - but he truly believes there is no other choice. I think it’s important to note how absolutely sincere Lucifer is with Sam - how much patience and softness he uses when explaining things to him. His voice is quiet, his mannerisms are slow and predictable, and rather than become frustrated with Sam, he expresses only sorrow

He understands that things will take time - he understands that Sam will fight him, because Sam has spent his entire life fighting monsters, and he has been raised to think of Lucifer as the greatest of them all. There is nothing the Archangel can say to change that lifelong belief, and the fear he sees in the eyes of his other half tears him apart. But still - he has faith:

And this??? This line has always, always been one of the most intriguing things Lucifer has ever said, imo. Tell me he doesn’t have a connection to Sam - that he hasn’t been hearing every prayer this human has uttered since the moment he learned to speak. Lucifer knows Sam - he knows exactly how he is going to react, and he knows exactly what kind of emotions he is fighting. More than that, he is telling Sam, in the vaguest way possible, that he believes he is lying to himself. 

Sam is going to say “yes,” and not because Lucifer pushes him into it or threatens him or coerces him, but because Sam ultimately feels the urge to do so. He has always longed for something more - he denied his so-called “path” and he pursued a career in, what else, but justice - the very thing Lucifer is fighting for. He wants everything Lucifer wants, but he wants it on a different scale, and the “big picture” the Archangel has in mind is something far too daunting for any human to accept. 

Once again, Lucifer is speaking as though he’s known Sam would be the key to his absolution from the moment he was imprisoned, if not before. So was it some divine prophecy (”and it was written…”)? Did God vow to Lucifer that he would have his chance at revenge? To me, that is completely counterintuitive (as even Lucifer states later, “We’re going to kill each other, and for what?”), and, if God did, in fact, promise Lucifer a savior, I think he meant for Sam to be exactly as stubborn and strong-hearted as he is. 

Sam was made to complete Lucifer, and vice versa. Sam was made to say “yes” to the Archangel, but, in my own, personal opinion, I don’t think it was to start the Apocalypse. I think Sam was meant to save Lucifer from that darkness within him, even if that meant they had to fail. I think we see proof of this in Swan Song, when Sam “defeats” Lucifer. Lucifer said it himself - it was a battle between them - and, yes, Sam won, but I don’t believe that means that Lucifer lost. 

I think Sam’s emotions, his love, and his faith - that was bringing out the good in Lucifer long before he threw them back into the cage. Lucifer begged Michael to walk away - he begged him to forget the Apocalypse and to turn away from their Father’s plan. He never wanted to fight his brother, and I think having Sam’s goodness and purity flowing through every part of his being reminded him of who he once was - of who he could be again, if given the chance. 

So, when it comes down to it: yes, I think Lucifer and Michael always knew that their stories would end with Sam and Dean. I think they knew the basics of the plan, but they interpreted it in their own way. The moment Sam let Lucifer in, all of that certainty began to wane, because the Morning Star was reminded of who he once was - of how he, too, had been pure and loving and hopeful. 

And here’s the irony in it: Lucifer had more faith in their Father’s plan than Michael ever did. He believed in his savior, and he believed that Sam was everything to him, whereas Michael saw Dean as an inconvenient prerequisite to killing his brother. Had Michael held the same conviction as Lucifer - had he been gentle and kind and patient with Dean - had Dean actually been convinced into saying “yes” to him, would they have fought at all? I don’t believe so. Dean’s love for Sam would have influenced Michael just as Sam’s love influenced Lucifer, and he would have seen his baby brother standing before him, begging for his mercy, and not the monster Heaven had declared him to be. 

A Game of Stars

Jonsa • Star Wars AU

Read: here (Tumblr) or here (AO3)!

Sansa Stark may not be Force-sensitive, but having one of the most powerful Force lineages in the galaxy makes for a charmed life. Growing up on Alderaan, Sansa has little to worry about besides her sister’s pranks, the quick temper of her fiancé Joffrey, and the growing rumors of a rebellion against the Targaryen Empire.

That all ends when Ned Stark, one of the Empire’s most trusted lords, is revealed to be a rebel himself. House Stark is stripped of its lands and power and Ned is taken to Coruscant as a hostage, while the rest of the once-great family is banished from the Core Worlds. Sansa is horrified to be leaving her home in disgrace, but her family isn’t done with the rebellion. There’s another secret Ned Stark has been keeping to protect his children from becoming weapons of the Empire: the Stark children are, in fact, Force-sensitive.

Sansa finds herself living on the frozen wasteland of Hoth, a planet devoid of life except for fearsome creatures like tauntauns, direwolves, and underground rebels. All she wants is to be back in Alderaan, not helping the rebel army and training to use the Force—no matter how much she loves the Jedi knights from old songs. But while her siblings have their own Force gifts, none of them can manipulate the thoughts of others as well as Sansa, making her invaluable to the rebels.

Jon Targaryen is more than just the Mad Emperor’s grandson being groomed to take the Kyber Throne: he’s an imperial general who uses the Force to command Rhaegal, one of the galaxy’s three legendary dragon-class starships. Fearsome in combat, there are whispers that he wields his red lightsaber like a flaming sword as he leads his elite stormtrooper unit Blizzard Force into battle. Jon, a bastard, was never meant to rule until his siblings were killed by rebels. After their deaths, Jon wants nothing more than to end the rebellion once and for all.

It’s a small galaxy, and secrets don’t stay hidden for long. When the Mad Emperor’s little birds tell him that the Starks are Force-sensitive, he tracks them down, discovering the hidden rebel base on Hoth. He sends Jon and Blizzard Force there with one order: Burn them all. But bring the Stark children to Coruscant.

It’s time for the two most powerful Force bloodlines in the galaxy to merge.

let’s live in denial
of how we didn’t
want to break
each other’s hearts
just because ours
were broken and
we wanted to know
how breaking
someone else’s heart
feels like, let’s not lie
about how
we wanted to know
what it felt like
to be so damn powerful
that one word
could break someone’s heart
—  Let’s pretend how we never meant to kill each other even with the murder weapon in our hands and each others blood on our souls // JustScribbledWords

anonymous asked:

do you have any meta or anything at all om finn and killing stormtroopers? someone pointed out to me recently that while he was against killing for the first order, he was willing to kill stormtroopers. i couldn't think of a solid explanation as to why, was wondering if you had something on it?

I’m sure there’s something in my Finn meta tag, though it might be a way back. This discussion got old over a year ago.


The thing is that Finn is not as such against killing. Remember what he says to Rey during his confession? “In my first battle, I made a choice. I wasn’t gonna kill for them.”

People tend to forget those last two words, which puts all of Finn’s actions and words into context. 

Because the First Order isn’t asking him to kill to protect someone who can’t defend themselves, or to protect himself, but to commit cold blooded murder. That’s what they’re asking of him at Tuanul - and if we include BtA at the mining colony - and that is the kind of killing Finn refuses.

But even in combat with armed opponents Finn will still try to minimize the casualties of the enemy when he can do so without putting himself or people he wishes to protect at undue risk. If you want an example I recommend @lj-writes brilliant meta on Finn’s and Poe’s escape from the Finalizer and Finn’s brilliant tactical decisions during that.


But we are, once again, back to the fact that TFA is a very Jewish story and Finn is a very Jewish hero.

Now even people who have never touched a Bible or Torah in their lives will likely know of the ten commandment and that the sixth says “thou shall not kill”. Except that’s not quite what it says.

In the original Hebrew text the word  “ratsakh” is used. This word means “unlawful killings”, what in modern day judicial terms would be covered by murder and manslaughter.

So the line should read in English “thou shall not commit murder or manslaughter”. (Sidenote, it is my understanding that more recent English translation does indeed have the line as “you shall not commit murder”, which as said is far more in line with the intent of the command.)

Note that it says nothing about killing an armed opponent in war - it was never meant to cover that - nor about killing in self defense.

In fact, one of the 613 other mitzvot (commands) not only permits, but commands self defense. So while all human life is seen as sacred and taking another person’s life should be prevented if at all possible, if we are attacked Jews are not only allowed, but commanded by G-d to defend ourselves. With lethal force if that is the only way.


So to recap, Finn’s problem with killing lies in the sixth command “you shall not commit murder or manslaughter”. (And we could say by extension massacres on civilians, which certainly falls under the heading murder.) Not with taking a life in self defense or the defense of someone else, such as on Takodana.

Flawed

Requested

Song or Quote :  Gasoline by Halsey
Who: Bucky Barnes

Are you insane like me? Been in pain like me?
And all the people say you can’t wake up, this is not a dream
You’re part of a machine, you are not a human being
I think there’s a flaw in my code. 


[Y/N] made her way through the Avengers Tower, wandering aimlessly around. It was inching close to four in the morning but sleep never came to those who had nightmares tucked behind their lids. She walked past the training room, her body stopping short when she saw a shadow hunched over on one of the benches. Stepping into the darkened room, she flicked on the light switch. 

Her breath hitched as she recognized the shinny metal arm blinding her for a moment. It was him. She hardly spoke the Winter Soldier but she understood because just like Bucky, she used to be a HYDRA weapon as well. Most of the team thought the two of them would have crossed paths but even within HYDRA, the Winter Solider was a ghost to those who weren’t important enough to think otherwise. 

After the downfall of HYDRA and the leaked files of SHIELD, [Y/N] was able to escape and seek redemption. Although, she had to fight hand to hand with the man who taught her everything she knew, Romlow, before she could escape. It left her with a few broken bones but in the end, her determination of leaving HYDRA and everything they stood for was driving her to win. HYDRA ripped away her smile, her innocence, and her free will. It conditioned her to be an emotionless machine without the mechanical upgrades. She was skillfully trained and could take down Natasha in a matter of seconds. [Y/N] could only imagine what they did to Bucky because after she knew he was real and heard the deaths he caused, it had to have been ten times worse than what she went through. 

Bucky turned slowly to see who was standing at the entry way, his jaw clenched as he turned back around. He had tried to avoid [Y/N] as much as he could. And the only reasoning was because he didn’t want to further the damage into revealing that he was the one who kidnapped her on HYDRA’s orders. He could never forget a face like hers. She had been so scared and back then, he didn’t care but now, he couldn’t see that kind of pain laced with devastation. 

“Can’t sleep?” Even though she had been in rehabilitation for a few years, getting her brain probed to remove HYDRA information, her voice was still emotionless. 

“Uh, yeah, can’t sleep.” Bucky responded, flinched when he felt like standing right beside him. No matter how hard they could try, the could never remove the type of training the both of them endured. 

[Y/N] took a seat next to him on the bench, pressing her finger nails in the padded material. “It’s kind of pathetic, isn’t it?” Taking in a deep breath, “We were both conditioned to feel nothing and now we feel everything. I know I wear an expressionless face and my voice might deceive my words but I can feel the regret and pain for every life I took.” Biting her lip, she looked over at Bucky who was watching her with an intent gaze. “We were never supposed to feel that. It was beaten into our systems, we weren’t humans anymore. We were machines, bred to fight and snuff out lives like it was nothing. And then tucked away until we were needed again.”

Bucky inhaled deeply, “I suffered more because I did remember. There was always a flaw within my code. I was never meant to be a machine, never meant to kill a man without a good solid reason. I’m a solider, a U.S. solider.”

“You were a U.S. soldier.” Looking away from him, she stared at her feet. “You had that title stripped from you the minute you fell from that train. Just like I had the title of being a young housewife taken from me.” Shaking her head, she looked back up at Bucky. “I know it was you that took me.” Bucky froze, “But, the thing is, I don’t remember that day. I just remember everything before and after.” Standing up, she placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “I don’t blame you. We were both unlucky pawns in a forced game that we wanted nothing to do with.” Pressing a small smile, “They used to tell me that this wasn’t a dream, that I was never going to wake up from it, so I should just do what I was told.” She scoffed a little, “Little did they know that we would wake up but they still won because we get to deal with the horrors of the aftermath.” Patting his shoulder, she spoke softly. “You and I aren’t so different, Bucky. We shouldn’t drift away from each other, instead we should lean on one another. Because you and I are the only ones who know what it’s like to be apart of HYDRA.” 

You wanna know why I’m not worried about Bellarke AT ALL? Because to me, even when they were canonically in a relationship, their best scenes were ALWAYS with each other.

- S1 and 2, Clarke and Finn wokay some nice contents. But the whole season 1 with Clarke trying to reach Bellamy? Him saving her, their looks, Day Trip, the fact that they both “parented” Charlotte? “Who we are and who we need to be to survive”? Their scenes when they were sick? “Our princess has that effect”? “I trust him!”? When Clarke talked to Jaha about Bellamy being essential for survival for the Delinquents? All their motivational speech? “People follow you, you inspire them”? The whole epicness paralleling their journeys on the first eps of s2? Their hug on ep5? The campfire scene? “Had to be done”? THE RADIO TALKS?? “It’s worth the risk”? “Love is weakness”/”i was being weak”? “You won’t be by yourself”? “I can’t lose you too”?? The whole non-verbal communication?? TOGETHER?? MW?? CANON STUFF Clarke NEVER had with Finn

- S3, CL? And Bellamy with Gina? Well while Bellamy was with Gina we got FUCKEN EP2!!! “I’ll do anything, I’ll stop fighting, please don’t hurt him” “Get out of my way”? “WE CAN’T LOSE CLARKE”?? Bellamy going through the forest while he’s hurt? “I should be there”? Bellamy climbing the whole Polis tower for Clarke while he’s hurt? Their “angsty looks” on ep3?? Him walking away?? HER FACE?? Also while building up CL,,,, ummm EPISODE 5 PEOPLE?? “This is not who you are”? And while Clarke was grieving Lxa, um the Look™ they had when they saw each other again on Nevermore?? Non-verbal communication again? Them helping each other with their wounds? “Maybe there are no good guys”? THE BEACH TALK?? “We need each other”?? THE HUG??? “I trust you”? “I believe you”?? “Start with Bellamy Blake”?? WHEN HE BRUSHED HER LIPS TO GIVE HER THE CHIP?

- DO WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT S4? Y’all were worried about NC, but we basically had a “YES YOU WILL”, “if I’m on that list, you’re on that list”, HAND. NUZZLE., the whole day Trip? “You keep her centered” “you got it backwards”? THE LIP QUIVERS™? Clarke sacrificing 50 ppl for Bellamy?? “Bellamy should be back by now”? “Clarke… if I don’t see you again”? The car chase? Roan taking Bellamy prisoner to make Clarke’s determination waver? The fact that she got him kidnapped to be safe in the bunker? Flustered/Sad kitten Clarke because she hurt Bellamy? “I never meant to hurt you”, the whole rover talk™, Bellamy killing a dude because he’s too busy smiling at Clarke?? EVERYTHING SINCE THEN?? The 2199 calls Clarke sent to Bellamy? The Hug? Crying in your arms? “LET HER GO ECHO” The heart to heart talk?

I probably forgot TONS of moments.

Listen people, no matter what, Bellarke has always been more epic than everything. More epic than any canon romantic relationship they’ve been in, and that won’t change no matter what.

Project M.A.M.B.A.

Description: While Steve Rogers had Bucky Barnes, Natasha Romanoff had you. 

Words: 2145

Notes: There’s not enough Nat fics tbh… my queen needs more attention. But WOAH, I’ve written three fics today! *claps* If you have any requests, I’m right here.

Characters: Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton.

Ship: Natasha Romanoff x Brainwashed!Assassin!Reader

Masterlist


Originally posted by marvelheroes


The blizzard ate away at the figure in the distance, slowly marching toward Natasha’s sinking figure. It was in her dream that she cried out, screaming for help as the snow slowly devoured her form. It bit into her skin, numbing the tips of her limbs and bluing her lips, weakening her usually strong determination to live. Her resolve crumbled when your visage came into view, not quite real or there, but dreamy.

You were in your usual suit. It was white as your surroundings, making it difficult to differentiate where you ended and where the snow began. But your face, hauntingly beautiful was startlingly present in contrast to the snow, eyes a dead E/C that lead to nowhere when Natasha stared into them. You reached her place where she drowned in white, staring down at her with an empty, abandoned expression. Natasha called your name desperately, her strong voice dying in her throat as the snow reached to her chin. You never responded.

They called you “Mamba”, the codename due to the fast way you moved and your venomous weaponry. You crouched in the snow, just before her but far enough away where Natasha couldn’t reach for you. Just as the snow breached her upper lip, you reached out to her. Natasha desperately reached back, yelling and screaming into the snow until her throat ran dry,”Ангел! Ангел!”

But you were not reaching out to take her hand or even stroke her face. You glided your fingers into her hair, wrapping tightly around her red locks until it began to hurt. Meeting her gaze, Natasha recognized the empty, far-off look and finally felt her voice cave; you were not you anymore. It was Mamba, the brainwashed filth they turned you into when a mission needed to be carried out. You were not Natasha’s angel in this state. Her stark red hair looked like more blood on your hands, staining your mind as you suddenly forced her deeper into the snow, plunging her into gray darkness.

Natasha lurched upright, the grip of her Glock 26 digging deep grooves into her palm. She lowered her weapon, finding herself aiming it at her window, expecting you—no, Mamba to be there, watching. Her chest heaved, and despite the cold temperature of her room (67° Fahrenheit, 19° Celsius), her entire body was thickly layered with sweat. She laid the gun on her bedside, feeling her heart rate spike in her ears as she covered her face.

F.R.I.D.A.Y must have read her pulse as well, asking from the panel on the wall,”Agent Romanoff, are you alrigh’?” Natasha could only nod, knowing that she was not okay and utterly terrified. Not of you, her sweet Y/N… but of Mamba, who was the only weakness she could name. She could never hurt you, and that meant she could never hurt Mamba… who could easily kill an innocent and Natasha wouldn’t be able to do anything against you.

She slid out of her silk sheets, hair hanging around her face as she grappled to hold onto the memory of your face. As the dream rapidly faded from her mind, Natasha entered her room’s adjoining bathroom and splashed water onto her face. Looking up at her reflection tiredly, her breath hitched and she sharply turned around to face the ghost she’d viewed behind her in the mirror. With her shaving razor poised to attack, she dropped it onto the counter as she realized you weren’t there. You weren’t coming back.


“She was yelling something like—” Clint tried to echo the Russian word, managing to get the point across as Bucky perked up,”It means angel. It’s a pet name.” He said, staring narrowly over his coffee. Clint’s face fell, sighing as he combed his fingers through his hair. Steve furrowed his brows, confused with Clint’s sudden concern,”Why would she say that during a nightmare?”

“It’s not my place to tell,” Clint said. Bucky and Steve exchanged a look, Steve asking with his eyes if Bucky knew anything. Bucky could only shrug. Steve crossed his arms over his broad chest, leaning back into the fridge,”Well as Captain of this team it’s important I know.” Steve tried to pull the “leader” card, and despite Clint’s hesitance, his shoulders slouched.

“Let’s just say…” Clint tried to find the proper words,”You have Bucky,” Clint gestured to the soldier, who sat at the kitchen island while reading the newspaper,” Tasha had Y/N… her angel.” The archer looked behind him, expecting to see Nat there with a glare on her features. Upon seeing he was clear, Clint escaped, successfully avoiding the wrath of the Black Widow.

Or, so he thought anyway. Natasha waited around the corner of the hall the kitchen was located within, listening quietly to Steve and Bucky’s voices.”Have you ever heard that name before…Y/N?” Steve questioned. Through the fuzz, the Winter Soldier stared off, nodding slowly,”I have,” He admitted, but the implication he didn’t know where from was clear. His head fell a little closer to his shoulders, hair curtaining around his face as he drank his coffee,”It makes me feel… scared.” Bucky admitted quietly to his best friend.

Natasha didn’t blame him.

She wanted to enter the kitchen and startle them, tell them off about budding into other’s business, terrify them into avoiding her name every time it came up. But she knew either way that her companions were worried for her, and would find out the truth either way. Steve would either ask her or go behind her back, and at this point, Natasha was too scared of her own feelings to intervene.


Steve read out the file to Bucky at their apartment, slowly reading the reports and the files. He’d managed to get everything they had due to his level 8 Avenger’s clearance, overpowering Natasha and Bucky’s shared level 7. It had been weeks since Clint had revealed the information to them in the New Avenger’s kitchen, and ever since Bucky and Steve had mutually agreed to discover why Natasha had nightmares about a woman named Y/N. Although it was mainly Bucky that convinced Steve to delve into Natasha’s privacy, as the two delved further into the reports, Steve now understood why Natasha was committed to helping him find Bucky.

[Full Name], (born (DOB), 1945) otherwise known as The White Mamba, The Mamba, The Black Mamba, and most likely several other code names created by the KGB, was a M.A.M.B.A (see M.A.M.B.A: file #687) operative and the only surviving member of the project. She was subjected to a number of tests, resulting in her ability to absorb the powers or memories of any person she touches if she chooses.

When out of cryostasis L/N was a trainer for the Red Room Black Widow operatives (see Black Widow: file #887), particularly Natasha Romanoff (see Black Widow: file #451). She was brainwashed into assassinating many Russian and other foreign leaders (see MAMBA Victims: file #7772) against her will, mainly by use of her abilities. She had been sighted/recognized a total of three times in three separate years; 1973, 2001, and 2016 (see Mamba sightings: file #723).

According to Agent Romanoff, she escaped from the Red Room at an unknown time.

Steve looked up from the page and to Bucky, who sat on the other end of the couch. While Steve read aloud he had discovered the file listing Mamba’s victims, doing nothing but displaying the first page to Steve. It seemed to be infinite, as Bucky went through page after page. The quirk in Steve’s brow became deeper as he and Bucky exchanged a look. The both stood from the couch to get their jackets.


You stared out at the rain, wondering which person you had touched that had been so in love with it. It exhilarated you, encaptured you in its damp trap. It felt at times that you alone could see the sky’s beauty in such a time of sadness. It tittered against your window, the newspaper detailing Natasha saving a school bus full of children folded and set aside.

You could still hear her voice, whispering your name in the darkness, reaching over and taking your hand from over the expanse between your beds. Thinking of the memories, of her blood-colored locks and her thickly lashed jades, made you rub your wrists flusteredly.

It was at this time that you yearned to touch her the most. You had control over your abilities now, you didn’t need gloves anymore. You wished you could convey to her just how proud you wanted her to be of you, because your pride for her was endless. Your Natalia was out there, dreaming of you as you dreamed of her.

You almost felt her smoothing her hand down your shoulder, you leaning into her as you stared together at the rain. But bitterly you remembered how they exposed your love for the rain, forcing you to stay out and get sick just to stalk a target. With your fantasy shattered, you turned away from the window and to your apartment. Maybe you’d go buy a new book, something to read on your day off tomorrow.

It was then that there was a knock on your door. You pulled out the knife from your sleeve, getting up to peer through the crack at the stranger wishing for entrance. It was strange, seeing his face after such a long time. You’d pass one another sometimes, but you’d doubt he’d remember. He was more caught up in the memories of the little blonde boy in his head. You wondered if he remembered when they made you work together on an assignment. Neither of you exchanged a word the entire time. Not while your victim screamed, and not when you returned to base with blood on your hands. Now he did— judging by the muted terror in his blue eyes.

He nodded down the hall toward your elevator, and you grabbed your bag from the sofa before closing the door behind you. As you descended, you were both wordless. He reminded you too much those days, those times, the vision you weren’t sure that were real or not. But you stayed quiet, stayed close, all for your Natalia.


Natasha wasn’t sure what you’d look like. You were young when it first began, when the kisses were exchanged in the dark and when your skin touched hers. She knew that you knew what she looked like now after so long, she knew you better than anyone; you were sure to follow her stories, as you followed her progress and her missions then.

But when you came in behind Steve and Bucky, she recognized you. You were just as beautiful as she remembered, and not the haunting beauty belonging to the Mamba, but your beauty. Mamba was just another memory now, as the true you had finally surfaced from oblivion.

“You look as beautiful as ever, Natashka.” You admitted softly. Hearing her name said in such tones quivered something in her stomach, fluttering for the first time in years.”Don’t be coy, Ангел.” Natasha gently reached out, fingers tentatively ghosting over yours. The question was silent but clear to you, the wordless language you had created over time flooding back into the basin of a river that had dried up long ago. With a nod, Natasha whirled into motion, engine restarted—revived to be with you again.

You held tight to those red curls, a protective tightness that Natasha had yearned for. Natasha pulled you in, lips slanting over yours without hesitation. Natasha was sharper than you remembered, but battle-hardened all the same. Flushing, she gasped for air and dove in again, your salty tears interrupting your usual taste.

Natasha had seen you cry before, felt your tears against her bloodstained skin, cursed in her mother tongue at your worries. But never had she seen you cry happily, the ecstatic tears of mirth flowing down your face like birds on their first flights. She rubbed him away, thanking every god she knew that you were here, within her grasp.

When you embraced her, your nose burrowed in her neck and your arms bound around her torso, you breathed in. You breathed freely for the first time in forever, breathing in her without the aftertaste of blood in your mouth or in her scent. Choking on your own sob, you found yourself laughing, laughing at yourself for hiding from your Natashka, your Natalia.

<I’ve missed you, my pretty spider.>” You whispered to her, your home’s language rolling off of your lips like a bitter memory made sweeter.

<Me too,>” Natasha murmured against the skin of your temple,”<My angel.>

Crime themed starter sentences

Includes drug and violence tw, a mix of which muse is the criminal, if not both.

  • “Your mother would be ashamed of you.”
  • “C’mon, the cops are stupid, they’ll never catch us.”
  • “The car’s a piece of junk anyway, they’re not gonna miss it.”
  • “Carry on the way you’re going and you’re gonna end up in prison.”
  • “I’m not that much of a scumbag, I don’t steal from old ladies.”
  • “One last score, then we’re out of the game, what do you say?”
  • “I’m only doing this because I need to pay my dealer.”
  • “Prison? Occupational hazard.”
  • “They pissed me off, I made sure they won’t be walking for a while, no biggie.”
  • “So you’re a drug runner or a drug dealer?”
  • “Prison ain’t too bad, you’ve got a bed and they feed you.”
  • “I get all tingly when you break into cars like that.”
  • “I do it for the thrill – and to fund my drug habit.”
  • “Did you kill him/her?”
  • “I never meant to hurt anyone!”
  • “I needed the money, what else could I do.”
  • “We grew up around criminals, of course we became them.”
  • “What kind of example are you setting for your kids?”
  • “I grew up, you probably should too.”
  • “He had it coming.”
  • “I just gave him his final warning.”
  • “I’m calling the cops!”
  • “I’m passionate about two things, bank robbery and you.”
  • “I’m a street rat, but I’m good at it.”
  • “Dealing in an alley, classy as ever.”
  • “If you don’t have my money, you know I’m going to have to teach you a lesson.”
  • “Bonny and Clyde made this look so much more glamorous.”
  • “One day we’ll be rich and we won’t have to do this anymore.”
  • “That’s not your wallet is it?”
  • “So I got in a fight, they owed me money.”
let’s live in denial
of how we didn’t
want to break
each other’s hearts
just because ours
were broken and
we wanted to know
how breaking
someone else’s heart
feels like, let’s not lie
about how
we wanted to know
what it felt like
to be so damn powerful
that one word
could break someone’s heart
—  Let’s pretend how we never meant to kill each other even with the murder weapon in our hands and each others blood on our souls // JustScribbledWords

all we are is a deconstructed skull,

you the empty barrel of a gun

and me the bullets-

I’m what is so lethal about us

we stopped at every liquor store

on the east coast
and no one 
is afraid of a boy
who is all words 
with no kickback,

I was the one who went off

drenched us both in blood
and left you there;
the smoking gun


you had only ever had misdemeanors
as lovers and I was a felony,
we killed like no one was looking,
ate the witnesses the next day


bang, bang, baby
we fuck on the bones
to feel edgy when all we are is raw,
open wounds for hearts
left gaping


you were never meant for killing,
this love was never a game for you
so you lost when the cops pulled up,
but I was always one for tarnishing
a good situation, one last shoot out
and as I went down, I met your eyes
knowing you would never survive

—  demolition lovers || O.L.