never bring me down

Don’t flatter yourselves guys, my father broke my heart long before you ever had a chance.
—  Epitome of Daddy issues
3

So I guess it’s time to come out of the closet:
I’m autistic! 🙂

I found out within the past few weeks, and I was considering whether or not I should post this, since there’s certainly a stigma associated with Autism. I was also debating how much information people other than my close friends should know about my life, especially knowing how judgmental strangers can be, without rhyme or reason. In the end, though, I decided that this is a new important aspect of my identity, and I should be open and honest about it.

At first I had difficulty accepting myself, and I deactivated my social media to reflect on the matter. One of the main questions going through my mind was: “how have other people viewed me for my whole life?” But I realize that other people’s opinions must not have been too big of an issue if I was able to live almost normally without finding out until college.

I’m also certainly not ashamed to be autistic. It may have made it more difficult to socialize, upkeep conversations or interactions, maintain friendships, make social decisions, and express interest in many topics throughout my life.. However, I’m glad that I’ve been able to see that these issues have been occurring and to understand how they’ve contributed to much of my regular self-frustration. This insight, along with finally knowing the source of many of my frustrations, will help me overcome various obstacles in the future.

Having this much self-realization in such a short amount of time also made me think about some relatively tough decisions. I began to wonder if I was truly enjoying college. If not, I wondered if I should just live with my parents and teach myself about my favorite subjects at home rather than continuing to attend Northwestern. I also wondered whether I should give up my love for social media based upon what others think of me. And, in the end, I came to the conclusion that both of these decisions would have been too drastic; Northwestern is a great college to receive an education, and I will never let opinions bring me down that low—to the point that I withdraw from society.

It’s been a strange couple of weeks, but I believe that knowing this about myself will help me work through challenges in my life and help me become a better person. I really try to only be kind to others; I’m sorry if I’ve come off differently to anybody, in any way. I don’t see Autism as anything “wrong” with me, and I’m happy to live in a society where autistic people can achieve greatness, along with everyone else. I’m looking forward to living my true self and my continual quest for self-knowledge.

PS: These photos are from a photoshoot I did with my friend Yasmine in the rain! The symbol on my shirt is an autistic pride symbol. The first picture is me jumping, and the second and third are reaction shots after landing. ☺️

Glory Days sentence starters
  • "Heard he in love with some other chick."
  • "That hurt me, I'll admit."
  • "Forget that boy, I'm over it."
  • "I hope she gettin' better sex. Hope she ain't fakin' it like I did."
  • "Took four long years to call it quits."
  • "Guess I should say thank you."
  • "Ain't sure I loved you anyway."
  • "You're really quite the man."
  • "You made my heart break and that made me who I am."
  • "I swear you'll never bring me down."
  • "I deleted all your pics then blocked your number from my phone."
  • "You ain't getting this love no more."
  • "I feel like for the first time I am not faking."
  • "Don't you keep it all to yourself."
  • "Just a touch of your love is enough to knock me off of my feet all week."
  • "Why you making me wait so long?"
  • "I promise to keep this a secret, I'll never tell."
  • "I know that this could be something real."
  • "All damn night I was here waiting."
  • "I know you were with her, I know that you kissed her."
  • "I was so mad, had my break-up speech ready."
  • "You're dirty, disgusting, but I can't get enough of your loving."
  • "Boy, I hate you, really hate you."
  • "My mama said I shouldn't date you."
  • "You're cheatin', you're lyin', I know that you're hiding."
  • "Why am I such a fool when it comes to you?"
  • "All my friends say I'm a sucker."
  • "I wish you were dead 'til you take me to bed."
  • "You lead on my love."
  • "Oh, them brown eyes and that body..."
  • "I'll get my revenge, take my key to your Benz."
  • "Then you smile, that's my killer."
  • "We broke up, we're better off as friends."
  • "We broke up... Now I accidentally need you, I don't know what to do."
  • "I messed around and got caught up with you."
  • "I don't know how long I can wait."
  • "This could be my greatest mistake."
  • "We had a good run."
  • "We messed around and had some good fun."
  • "Guess it turns out I lost a good one."
  • "I accidentally know that you're in love with me, too."
  • "So can we try again?"
  • "We're official, more than friends."
  • "Is that what you call flirtin'?"
  • "When you wanna start growin' up, we can maybe fall in love."
  • "I need a man who can act like a man."
  • "Everybody warned me."
  • "But you're kinda hot, so I thought, why not?"
  • "I need a man."
  • "I'm tasty, delicious, I'm rough around the edges."
  • "My mind is obsessive, my flex is aggressive."
  • "Glad I didn't listen to my teachers."
  • "I don't mind offending, I ain't 'bout pretending."
  • "Them haters be hating, my fashion be trending."
  • "Get down and dirty."
  • "I don't ask the mirror, I know I'm the fairest."
  • "They wanna know who I'm sneakin' into my place, they don't need to know, no one's business how I play."
  • "Baby, you're the man, but I got the power."
  • "You make rain, but I'll make it shower."
  • "You should know, I'm the one who's in control."
  • "I got the power."
  • "Got you thinking that I'm all innocent, but wait 'till I get you home."
  • "If I ain't got nothin', least I got you."
  • "Come and kiss me like the first time."
  • "Let's pack up and run away, just me and you."
  • "There ain't no heartache you can't undo."
  • "You're the one that I need."
  • "Take my hand baby, please."
  • "I'm alive, if living's just a beating heart."
  • "We won't admit we've taken it too far."
  • "I know it's love cause I will always be the first to start making up excuses when it hurts."
  • "I'm alone again and all I want is to feel again."
  • "There's nobody like you."
  • "I'm screaming "I don't want you" but you know that I do."
  • "I only like myself when I'm with you."
  • "I'm alone again."
  • "All you left me with was scars."
  • "I keep trying to put this behind me."
  • "I still wanna know who's taking you home."
  • "For tonight, I'm going to get my mind off it."
  • "No more sad songs."
  • "Don't care where I go, just can't be alone."
  • "They'll never know me like you used to know me."
  • "I will only hurt myself, tryna hurt you."
  • "You got my adrenaline pumping when you stand so close."
  • "You had me at hello."
  • "You're the only one that's taking me home."
  • "If you want to touch it then baby you should."
  • "You got my permission to do what you like."
  • "No matter what the deal, babe, you know that I'll be there."
  • "We've come so far, baby."
  • "Nothing else matters like us."
  • "I don't wanna fight, not tonight."
  • "I don't really care about nothing else."
  • "I told you don't let me down, I know you never did."
  • "Look at us now, still you and me."
  • "I don't want nobody else."
  • "I got you all to myself."
  • "I give it all to you, so baby don't let me down."
  • "We got it all, babe, right where we want it to be."
  • "My leather jacket smells like your aftershave."
  • "All I wanna do is get your hands up on my booty."
  • "The thought of you is driving me wild."
  • "I love, love, love making love to you."
  • "You don't get these kisses for free."
  • "Don't make it worse lying to me."
  • "You'll be sleeping in the bed alone."
  • "Little boy, you better run along."
  • "I ain't playing games no more.
  • "Get your story straight."
  • "I won't forgive you for your mistakes."
  • "Don't try to turn this 'round boy, it's too late."
  • "Go 'head, boy, live your dream, don't come crawling back to me."
  • "I've got two sides of me, boy; the one you want your mother to meet and the one that's a freak."
Damage

Summary: Bucky and the team don’t realize the damage they caused until you snap. Will they be able to fix it?

Warnings: Depression, yelling, angst. but FLUFFY AT THE END.

Note: This is my first ever fanfiction writing so please bear with me. :)

You know that feeling you get when you had your first heartbreak? Or what it feels like to never feel good enough? Or maybe you might feel a part of your soul has died? 

That is how you feel, and have felt for years. You just were good at hiding it. Until he came along. Bucky Barnes. You feel in love with him in the beginning because he made you feel worth it. But every fairytale doesn’t have a happy ending. Go figure it would happen to you.

“Hey Y/N!” Bucky made you jump 5 feet in the air. That’s when you noticed your surroundings, you were on the couch in the main living room with all your co-workers. Your eyes didn’t sparkle anymore, your hair is up and greasy, your skin is paler, and you just look dead. You wore comfortable clothes. Your favorite sweater, some leggings and some knee socks.

“yes?” you whispered to Bucky but not looking anywhere but at the full cup of tea in your hands, that has gone cold by now. “What’s wrong with you?” Bucky asked with a irritated voice. God knew that you were to weak emotionally to send him an angry glare and tell him off. Instead you just gave up and stood up slowly, walked to the exit and turned around with a blank face and no emotions in your eyes as you said..

“I want to die. I want to punch you and tell you how every “nickname” you give me bring me down, I want to never leave my room but most importantly I wish you all would stop treating me like i can take every insult you throw at me. I’M NOT GLASS BUT I SURE AS HELL AM NOT A BRICK WALL EITHER. I’M HUMAN WHICH MEANS I HAVE LIMITS! OH AND ANOTHER THING STOP BEING SO DAMN VAIN! ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOUR FEELINGS NOT ANYONE ELSE!” by the end of your confession you had tears down your face and the whole team looked at their feet, knowing you were right. They could get a little rough with their “teasing” as they called it. It was all true, they would call you names that made you insecure.\

One time Sam and Steve “jokingly” wouldn’t let you come to club with them because they didn’t like the way you looked. You cried the entire weekend.  Natasha and Wanda would always tease you about losing weight every time you went shopping with them.  Tony called you stupid.  Bruce always snapped at you. Even when you didn’t talk.Vision means well but when he made the comment of it not making sense for you to be here because you aren’t a great assassin or you don’t have powers, you then tumbling into your depression.

They didn’t cause you to have depression, you’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression since you were 15 so it’s not new but that doesn’t make it right. 

But Bucky was the worst because you loved him. He made you insecure in the worst ways. You are an extrovert, silly, and you loved yourself at one point. But he just didn’t stop, so you shut yourself down.

Bucky stood there in shock but then it turned angry.Oh hell no.

“If you can’t take a damn joke then you shouldn’t be an Avenger Y/N. If you are depressed then get help, not put your problems on us. Don’t blame us for the chemical imbalance in your brain. I don’t know why Fury even brought you here. You are worthless.” Bucky stated calmly, though it was angry and irritated. 

You stood there, then it happened. 

You snapped

You laughed in his face. Full on laughed. Everyone was shocked by Bucky’s response but when they saw yours they got really worried. You had tears coming down your face from how hard you were laughing, you finally stopped and walked up to him at arms length. And with a cold stare and a snarl on your lips, you slapped him across the face. 

“You ASSHOLE. You want to talk about ME not being an Avenger. You’re THE DAMN WINTER SOLDIER YOU FUCKED UP PRICK. YOU DO NOT AND WILL NOT BLAME THIS ON ME. YOU CAME HERE BROKEN AND WE HELPED YOU AND YOU THINK I SHOULD’NT BE AN AVENGER. OH PLEASE! I CAN’T GET HELP YOU DICK. IT’S CALLED CLINICAL DEPRESSION FOR A REASON. IT WILL NEVER GO AWAY! You don’t know anything about me or my problems because you were so absorbed with yourself and you didn’t think when you called me those horrible nicknames. Loser. Freak. Weirdo… you whispered the last nickname because that hurt worse. By now you were drained and everyone noticed how pale you were and how fragile you looked. 

It’s their fault

You backed away from Bucky, who looked more shocked and confused, and you ran to your room. 

..

….

…..

“We fucked up.” Steve finally spoke. If it was a normal day, everyone would have laughed at him and told him to watch his language. But today was nothing but gloom and guilt for the team. Even Bucky. No,especially Bucky.  

 “What do we do?” Tony whispered, afraid of his own voice. Everyone pondered for hours until Wanda spoke up. 

“We heal her. We watch what we say. Y/N isn’t one who puts faith into words but rather actions so we clean up the mess we made and start acting like her friends like we should’ve done.” Everyone agreed to Wanda’s response and one by one headed to their rooms except Natasha and Bucky. 

“You love her.” Nat stated. They both sat their with their hands in their lap and looking at their shoes as if they found them fascinated. She looked in front of her watching Bucky slowly and painfully nod.

She stood up and told him something simple.

“Then show it. Because I’ll be damned if i treat her anything less like a sister again.” She walked towards her room ready to beat herself up all night. 

You spent the last couple days locked up in your room with some Disney movies and a bottle of Vodka helping you get the strength to face everyone again. Especially Bucky.

You got dressed and made sure to wear over-sized clothes, you didn’t feel right wearing something skin tight or anything near that. You hated your body again. With a sigh and a shot of Vodka you walked out of your room with your head down and playing with the strings on your sleeves. You reached the movie room and sat down in the middle of the couch and asked F.R.I.D.A.Y to play the saddest movie on Netflix. You buried yourself in the blankets you left there last week. When the movie was just about to start, the team all piled in the room. You began to get up and take your leave thinking they wanted a movie night. You were about to take a step toward the door when Bucky pushed you right back down on your previous spot and sat on your right and put your feet on his lap while he gently pushed your shoulder so you where laying down. Everyone sat on the other couches or floor. You were still scared to talk and still confused. When you opened your mouth to object Bucky shushed you signalling that the movie was about to start. You nodded and began watching the movie. 

Cyberbully, how ironic. 

The whole team was in tears as the movie ended and you were on the verge of crying but didn’t want to cry again in front of Bucky. Bucky however was crying silently and gripping your ankles like his live depended on it. The lights came back on and Tony asked you why would you be watching this. You shrugged and went to get up but Bucky didn’t let you. 

“We fucked up.” Steve said for the second time that month. You chuckled dryly as you allowed a couple of stray tears to fall. You nodded and realized what they are doing about it and your heart pulled a little. They are fixing their mistakes.

Wanda nodded at you, hearing your thoughts as they were so strong with pain and hurt. She started to read your mind the week of your outburst and she cried every time because of the raw emotions that you gave away. She envies you. You’re everything she wants to be. 

“Fix it and then we’ll talk.” You replied softly and ripped your legs away from Bucky’s grip and walked to your room feeling drained already. After that night they did just that,they fixed it. By the end of a year you were almost your old self again. You were closer with Wanda, Natasha, and Bucky. Wanda and Natasha had told you they brought you down because their mind is overflowing with self-doubt and before they realized it they took it out on you. It took some time but you forgave them and the team. Bucky made sure everyday that you knew how much he thought you were beautiful, smart, and kind. You were happy. Everything was okay again especially since Bucky asked you to be his “doll” as he called it. That day he kissed you and told you he will never bring you down again. You agreed knowing it won’t happen again. You kissed him with all the love you have for this metal man. As you released his lips, much to his dismay, you sighed and softly breathed out, “ I’m happy again.” With that he smiled so beautifully that you swore you loved him more. 

And you continued to love him…

And Bucky’s and your kids…

And your team…

Until the end of the line.

Status: Little Mix

Can’t be afraid to take a fall. /  Não se pode ter medo de cair.

But all you left me with was scars. /  Mas tudo que você me deixou foram cicatrizes.

Fuck that, get down and dirty. /  Foda-se isso, dancem e arrasem.

I don’t ask the mirror, I know I’m the fairest. /  Eu não preciso perguntar pro Espelho, eu sei que sou a mais bela de todas.

Them haters be hatin’, my fashion be trendin’. / Os invejosos continuam invejando, meu estilo continua sendo copiado.

They don’t need to know, no-one’s bussiness how I play. /  Eles não precisam saber, não é da conta deles o que eu faço.

But you ain’t getting this love no more. /  Mas esse amor você não tem mais.

Go ‘head, babe, I'mma live my life. /  Vá em frente, meu bem, eu vou viver minha vida.

Forget that boy, I’m over it. /  Esquece esse cara, eu já superei.  

Hope she ain’t fakin’ it like I did, babe. /  Espero que ela não finja como eu, meu bem .

Well, I’m all the way up, I swear you’ll never bring me down. /  Bem, eu tô com tudo, e você não vai me derrubar.

You used to tell me that you loved me once, what happened? / Você costumava dizer que me amava,  o que aconteceu?

What have we become? /  Em que nós nos transformamos?

Love me or leave me here. /  Me ame ou me deixe aqui.

Cos I could still be the only one you need. /  Porque eu ainda posso ser tudo que você precisa.

Yeah I could still be that place where you run. /  Sim, eu ainda posso ser o lugar onde você busca abrigo.

I don’t mind offendin’, I ain’t 'bout pretendin’. /  Eu não ligo pras ofensas, eu não sou dessas de fingir.

I know it’s love 'cause I will always be the first. /  Eu sei que é amor porque eu vou sempre ser a primeira.

There’s nobody like you. /  Não há ninguém como você.

I’ve tried goodbye a hundred times, not one of them true. /  Eu tentei dizer adeus centenas de vezes, nenhuma delas foi verdadeira.

I’m screaming I don’t want you, but you know that I do. /  Eu estou gritando que não te quero, mas você sabe que eu quero.

Strong, a side of me you never found. /  Forte, um lado de mim que você nunca encontrou.

I wanna feel you in the dark. / Eu quero te sentir no escuro.

Wish I could somehow go back in time. /  Gostaria de poder de alguma forma voltar no tempo.

Every second, every thought. I’m in so deep. / A cada segundo, cada pensamento, eu estou tão envolvida.

Would you leave if I was ready to settle down? /  Você o largaria se eu estivesse pronto para me comprometer?

We got a love that is hopeless. /  Nós temos um amor que é sem esperanças.

Because over a thousand, THOUSAND, of you gorgeous human beings decided to follow this little blog (I have no idea why), I decided to open an ask Lance and Keith to entertain you guys. You can ask them a question or even request something for me to do. I just want to thank all of you guys for your support and kind words, I never thought tumblr of all places would help bring me out of downs that have me near tears. Thank you guys so much, I love each and every one of you!

8

Guess Who’s Back! 


So glad to be back and in business. Never have I ever let a person bring me down and it ain’t gonna happen period. Can’t wait! Miss all my babes XoxoMel.


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anonymous asked:

Reborn, Xanxus and Dino trying to make up for insulting and trying to break things off between Tsuna and his s/o due to some misunderstanding

COMPLETE

admin adelheid

Reborn

“He he he! So where’s your darling Decimo now ehhh?!”

“I can’t believe it was all so fucking easy to set you up as a traitor! Just goes to show how little faith he’s got in you, right?”

You grit your teeth as you glared up at the two men both holding their guns out and aiming at the top of your head. Clearly this is where you’re going to die. For a second you wished you could have seen Tsuna’s face one more time. The thought of that slight smile on his face when he looked at you… The loneliness in his eyes you have always took pride in vanquishing… The gentle touch of his rough, calloused hand… It almost made your tears spill out but you couldn’t. Not in front of these people. She will not give them the satisfaction of begging for her life.

“You both stink and are both butt ugly,” you shot at your attackers sharply, your eyes blazing as you did so. “You’ll never bring Tsuna down. Never. If you’re going to kill me then do your worst, assholes!”

You watch with some satisfaction as both their faces turned purple in rage before both of them cocked their guns in anger.

“Why you little―”

But the words and the shot did not come to be. One moment you were certain you were about to die and the next blood was spraying from both these men’s foreheads. For a few moments all you could do was stare in shock at the two now very, very dead bodies huddled at your feet before you realized that those bullets had had to come from somewhere.

“I know you’re there. You might as well come out.”

Reborn stepped out of the shadows at your request knowing he had given himself away by firing off that shot that put down the dog who had dared try to kidnap you. His piercing stare shot through you from the shadows of his fedora as he held his gun up, the tip still smoking from its use.

Your eyes went wide at the sight of the world’s greatest hitman standing before you in this dark, lonely alley you had been forced into by the men who had pointed a gun to your back and demanded you follow their instructions.

“Reborn?” Instantly your guard went up. Wasn’t this the same man who had accused you of playing Tsuna for a fool? Wasn’t he the reason why your fiancé kicked you out of the mansion and called off their engagement? “What do you want?”

Reborn remained quiet for a moment just staring at you. And then the man shocked you by taking off his fedora, putting it on his chest and bowing to you respectfully.

You stand there stunned at this. Hadn’t Tsuna said that the reason Reborn never takes his fedora off was because it made him feel vulnerable? A headshot was always a sure fire way to kill a target so he hid that most vulnerable spot at all times. He wore that hat like it was armor. There were even rumors going around that the bowl of that hat had bulletproof lining that can stop a Falcon rifle’s direct hit. Taking it off in front of anybody was a show of utmost respect and humility. A sign of good faith.

“Good evening.” The hitman said, piercing eyes never taking itself off of your form.

You blink at him in confusion and surprise, still too shocked at the display to reply. It required several deep breathes before you could say anything again with any measure of sense. “What do you want, Reborn? Did he send you out to kill me too?”

“No.” you watch him purse his lips as though he had just eaten a particularly sour lemon before putting his hat back on. “I guess I’m here to take you home.”

“I was on my way hom―”

“No, not there. Excuse me, let me correct myself.” He nodded in the general direction of your apartment and you feel exasperated. Of course he knew where you were staying. “I’m here to take you back where you belong. Tsuna’s still waiting for you. Despite what I say he isn’t going to give you up. Even now he’s trying to figure out a way to prove your innocence.”

You stare back at him, speechless as his lips twisted in a wry smile you had only heard about but never seen on the hitman’s face in your presence. It was there for a solid second before it turned into a serious mien as he glanced at the two dead bodies on the ground.

“I will personally execute the mastermind behind your frame up and present it to you.” The sharp, tight lipped smile that followed that promise made a sliver of fear strum at your spine. “Consider it a wedding gift to the Vongola Decimo’s future consort.”

Well, you think as you blinked rapidly. I guess this is his version of saying ‘I’m sorry’.

Xanxus

You wake up in the middle of the night feeling thirsty so you get up to sleepily make your way over to your kitchen. As you pass the living room a car passed by and its headlight hit a glinting pair of red situated in a dark silhouette made you jump back. You were barely able to hold back a scream as you realized someone was sitting on your most comfortable chair.

Just as you were about to make a run for it to lock yourself in your room a low, rumbling voice shot out of the dark and paralyzed you; gripping you by the neck and rendering you motionless like a hand around your throat.

“Calm the fuck down.”

You blink rapidly at that and realized you knew that voice. You knew those pair of red eyes.

“Xanxus?” you whispered quietly as though half afraid of the truth. That just saying his name would summon him right there in front of you.

You fumbled with a dimly lit lamp set in the small table nearest you and once it’s candle like rays in the room your suspicions were confirmed. You were in the presence of the Varia Boss himself. You stiffen and took a step back thinking you were in danger even as defiance sparked in your eyes.

This man was the reason Tsuna had been forced to have you interrogated for being a spy. This man was the reason you had to be hospitalized for three months. If it weren’t for the fact that you loved Tsuna so much you would have left the brunette because of this man’s influence. Fear and anger gripped your heart as you stood in front of the dark skinned Mafioso in nothing but your flannel pajamas.

Was he here to kill her?

Would he really dare endanger the Alliance further by getting rid of her because he still thought her guilty for being a traitor? Xanxus had always been somewhat of a wild card, second only to Enma who hid his intentions behind a mask of meekness. What was he planning now?

“What are you doing in my house?” you finally find the strength to ask even as you try to steady your stance. You refuse to crumble before this man.

His eyes were felt like red hot brands as he stared into your eyes. The first time you saw those eyes you have already noticed how similar its effect can be to Tsuna’s golden ones but much more explosive, much more volatile compared to Tsuna’s contained cruelty. Now, though it had traces of contemplation over the violence that made you feel like you were being… considered.

It only made you lift your chin up to stare him down. You will not cower before bullies.

Movement outside your window caught your attention and you look out to see a familiar flash of white and blonde hair disappearing from sight so fast one would think it was only a trick of the light.

Wait, were those Squalo and Belphegor?

“Your life is in danger.”

You blinked at the announcement, turning your attention back to the Varia Boss. It was not what you were expecting to hear.

“Eh?”

He ignored your surprise and continued to languidly sit there staring at you with bored, almost lazy eyes as he continued his explanation. “Some idiotic mother fucker thinks he can get through that brat by harming you. And once they get a hold of the brat’s neck they think they could control the Vongola. Mammon’s been keeping an eye on their activities for a month now and we have it on good authority they’ll strike tonight.”

You honestly don’t know what to say. It was mind boggling enough to have this man sitting in your living room like he owned the place.

“Go get what you needed and go back to sleep.” His voice rumbled in the room again before closing his eyes and leaning back into her chair like a dragon settling down to sleep. “As long as we’re here no harm will touch a strand of your hair or an inch of your skin. You have my word.”

Mind still scrambled at the very idea of Xanxus in her house watching over her but feeling the genuine truth behind his words you hurry and get your glass of water before going back to your bedroom. Before you close the door, though, you hear him mutter in the darkness you left behind as you switched the lamp light you had earlier on back off.

“With this… My debts are paid. To you and that fucking Sawada.”

Dino

You try to gather courage no matter how much your knees were shaking. Beyond these double doors were the crème of the crop belonging in Tsuna’s world. He had told you about how you would be judged and criticized and be wary of the sharp words and innuendos. The opportunists and the machinations of both friends and hidden enemies alike.

The moment the doors were opened all conversation ceased as all eyes turned over to you. You almost turned tail and ran but you caught sight of your fiancé listening to something Gokudera was saying even as his eyes locked on to yours. His gaze gave you courage. It made your spine straighter and your legs steadier.

Know your place, you remembered Tsuna saying this morning before he left for his office. You are my queen. The one I chose. You deserve to be by my side.

Determined to do him proud you walk towards your future husband like the queen he had proclaimed you to be. Inwardly you laugh, though. This was like a twisted version of Cinderella.

As the crowd started to gather around you in curiosity you don’t notice the outstretched foot of a jealous jilted lover from another Mafia Famiglia on your path preparing to humiliate you. When you stumbled because of the mean trick you expected to land on the floor and the whole ballroom laughing at your shame but instead a strong forearm caught you and smoothly pulled you back in place.

Shocked you look up to see the handsome face of the Cavallone Don there by your side smiling sharply at the woman who had tripped you.

“I didn’t realize people in parties like these can still act like fifth class citizens,” he said smoothly but with a cold innuendo that made something cold trickle down your spine. It was as though Dino’s charm had turned from a feather into a cruelly sharpened scythe. “Such a disappointment shall not marry into a don’s Famiglia, I will make sure of that.”

The woman’s face turned red in humiliation even as she tried to pretend to be innocent. The hidden threat and promise in Dino’s words made her go pale as soon as she heard it.

Making his meaning subtly clear Dino tucked your hand in the crook of his arm and began escorting you over to where Tsuna was and all the while you walk beside him stiffly. You can still remember how this man had tried to seduce you― how he tried to make Tsuna get rid of you― all because he thought you were merely a gold digging harlot that had the fortune to meet Sawada Tsunayoshi. You could still remember the fury you felt when you rejected his advances and how you had avoided him ever since. It made your skin crawl just to have him near like this but you needed to bear it for now. Not here in public. It would make everyone certain there was trouble within the Vongola.

“Relax, I won’t bite.” You hear Dino say even as he smiled and waved at people around him who greeted the Cavallone don.

“I can’t help it,” you replied, doing exactly the same. “I hate your guts.”

He smiled softly. “I deserve that.”

“Good to know.” You wryly replied from the corner of your mouth.

“Look, I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” you glance at him warily and found him looking back at you with a sincerity you had never before seen on his face; not even when he was trying to seduce you. “Tsuna is like a little brother to me. I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t making a mistake by choosing you. He holds our whole world in his hands. Choosing a partner is not something he can do lightly.”

You wanted to bristle angrily but you could also appreciate the meaning behind his words. Being with Tsuna had taught you how the delicate ties of ‘Family’ can be and you already knew the bond between the Vongola and the Cavallone was the strongest you have seen in this world of blood and madness. It would be a shame if it was severed. She didn’t want to cause Tsuna any more pain.

“I already know that,” you admitted with a grudging smile. “Why do you think I haven’t told him that you tried to seduce me?”

“Oh he knows about that,” Dino said so casually that you had to do a double take. “The reason why the Cavallone and the Vongola have such a good relationship is because we have always been at least fifty percent aware of each other’s plans. He was pretty angry when I told him about it but when I told him you wanted nothing to do with me he couldn’t be prouder.”

Your heart thumped at what Dino was saying. Was this guy for real?

“Don’t worry, the alliance is secure and better than ever because of you,” the sincerity and gratefulness in his voice made you look up and see the fond gaze you had ever only seen him give Tsuna. “The Cavallone pledges our loyalty to you and the Vongola Decimo. You are one of us. If you need us, we will always be waiting. This, I promise you.”