never boyfriend

he had me drunk at my first party
then he drove me back to my house
we fought in the car
you had me drunk at my first party

he tried to kiss me
but i unlocked my door and climbed through my window
you tried to kiss me

on monday he stared at me in spanish
then he waited for me by my locker
on tuesday he asked me if i wanted to go to the lake

november has never been so sweet for me
you asked me if i wanted to go to the lake
i told you to let me go in december
november was never that sweet for me

it’s may now and i want him more than ever
i should’ve known what i was asking
because it’s may now and i want you more than ever

-april//may25th2017//couldn'tgiveyouwhatyouwanted

clingy and annoying doesn’t bother me when it’s from the right person, i literally do not mind if my boyfriend sends me a picture of a car he likes at 3am even if I’m not really into cars, his first thought was ‘i know imma send that to my girlfriend’ and yes i love that shit

I know, you think my generation doesn’t give two fucks about anyone else but themselves. but honestly why should we. everyone we loved left us for someone better, someone with longer legs or bigger bank balances. everyone we respected disappointed us by weaving us in a myriad of lies. everyone we idolised betrayed us. in a generation where everyone is letting everyone down, everyone is too stressed or too anxious, do you except us to care about other people. do you expect us to protect people from drowning when we dont even know how to swim. do you expect us to save lives when we want to end our own. do you expect us to love when our own hearts have been shattered into pieces. do you actually except us to give fucks about anyone but ourselves.
—  i am sorry i am selfish
9

#HappySehunDay 🐥🎉 [ ver. 1 / ver. 2 ]
↳ Happiest birthday to EXO’s cutest baby boy who’s simultaneously the unlikely and the obvious maknae! You are so loved, so precious, so talented and an absolute sweetheart who deserves the world, my dear. I hope you know each day of you waking up is another day of you becoming the best version of yourself; we’re already (and will always be) so proud of you. Thank you for being you and keep smiling, Oh Sehun!

I looked through our conversations when we used to be on cloud nine and in love, these were the times you told me how lucky you are to have a girl like me, how thankful you are because you never received such love I was giving to you and whatever happens, you will never let me go. The words you said mean everything to me and it stabs my heart, realizing that these words mean nothing anymore. I can’t help myself but to cry my heart out till the sun has set. The pain is too heavy to bear, the love I believed to be true and different was gone. We used to be over the moon, but the present tells the opposite. This is stupid of me to say but, I won’t deny the fact that I miss you so much. I love you, I still do. But somehow, I’ve come with the thought that I can’t do anything anymore, I need to let you go because it’s the right thing to do. I’ve decided to finally move on and this would be the last time I would cry over you because there was nothing left to hold on to and I can’t hold on to something that doesn’t want to be held.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry because I was the reason why you let things end. I’m sorry for the terrible mistake I made, I never blamed you for deciding to end this because you were hurt and I understand. I only have myself to blame. But, I was hoping you would’ve understood, that I did it for us. I always feared the day would come, the day you will finally won’t take back the words you’ve said. I’m sorry for the other things that have hurt you, for the things that made you cry, jealous and mad. 


Thank you. I’m thankful that I met you because you have given me a temporary bliss. I laughed and smiled because of you. Somehow, you made me feel loved and beautiful in a short period of time. Thank you for the good days: the days we felt unstoppable like we’re flying high, when holding your hand felt like home, leaning on your shoulders made me feel secure and hearing your voice sound like the angels are singing. It was worth it, being loved and loving you. Thank you for making me realize how capable I am to love someone. You proved forever within a number of days. You were the greatest and worst thing ever happen to me. 


Goodbye. This will be the last time that I will write you a message, I’ll accept the fact that some things are meant to end, even though I used to believe that you won’t let that happen. I did everything I could to make you stay, but I guess your life no longer includes me because, you’re happy now and I can see that clearly. You already found a love that’s all the things ours couldn’t be. I hope you find overwhelming joy by her side, I hope she won’t hurt you and make you cry. I hope for the best for the both of you. It hurts but I’ve accepted the painful truth that I am just a distant memory now. I don’t regret loving you, but what I regret is that I let myself believe that this would last.


I won’t forget you and the memories, I will always keep you alive in my heart. I’ll just get used to not having you in my life anymore. Deep within my heart knows getting over you won’t be simple. I need to stop loving you so I can start loving myself again. You were a painful blessing, but you were also a great lesson. I guess you’re just another chapter of my life needed to end. I still and will pray for your safety and happiness even though I’m in pain right now, I still believe you deserve the best. I hope you find everything in her that you couldn’t find in me. You will always be my greatest love.

—  S.L // unsent last message

:for every writer on tumblr:

I hope you meet someone, someday, who makes you write about things that make you happy rather than unhappy.
I hope you meet someone, someday, who makes you write about love instead of heartbreak and people who chose to stay instead of leave.
I hope you meet someone, someday, who makes you want to write about the feelings that make you feel alive right now rather than the feelings that make you feel dead.

—  tenth of march
You really fucked me up, you know that? I constantly type messages and go to press send, and then remember you don’t actually care. I constantly looked down your street everytime I drive by in case I see the tiniest bit of you, even though I know you wouldn’t do the same. I constantly look at photos of us and remind myself of memories, and I know that you wouldn’t dare to even think of them. I constantly remember every detail about you from your blue eyes to your horrible laugh, and you don’t even give me a second thought. That’s the difference between me and you, that was always the difference between me and you. I treasured every possible moment I could because I thought it was forever, you didn’t because you thought of me as an object that would pass time.
—  I’m tired of feeling this way

If people will be named after colors, I’ll call you purple. The kind of purple that melts in the sky when the sun is about to set and take a rest for awhile. The type of purple that makes my heart jumps a little and lits up the excitement in my eyes.

If people will be named after flowers, you’ll be my rose, no matter how painful your thorns. I’ll embrace you with my arms open wide and cage you in a warm tight hug. Even if it makes me bleed red that’ll surely tear my heart apart.

If people will be named after seasons, I’ll choose Summer among all of those four. You’ll be the sun that kisses my skin, and made my day goes lighter along the way. You’ll make me love the ocean more, and dance to groovy songs. You are the season which will never get tired of warming my heart when Winter tried to cool it with its cold breeze and snowy hands.

If people will be named after places, I’ll call you home. Not Paris, nor New York. You are the place that will always make my heart aches when I’m away—because I’ll surely miss you the moment we took our separate ways. You are the shelter that protects my heart, the one I will always run to no matter what I’m feeling. Happy, angry, sad, jolly, grateful or in love. Because you always understand and know the real me. You’ve seen me— on my ups and downs, and still accepts me— for who I am. I’ll name you after a place that doesn’t have a fancy name, yet will always be the one that will tell me that it’s okay to feel. That it’s okay to be me.

You will always remain in my heart no matter where I go.

And because people have identities, and so are things.

But you and your name will always be my favorite.

—  ma.c.a // Maybe I should Call You Mine
Long Distance

If hands
could reach
right through
this screen

I’d rest
your head
upon
my knees

I’d stroke
your hair
‘til you
believe

That we’ll
conquer
our hopes
and dreams

This year
like those
now too
shall pass

And though
at times
it won’t
be fast

We’ll close
the distance
with
our words

Which now
the world
will all
have heard

And…

If hands
that write
could bring
you close

I’d write
enough
to bear
us both

I’d write
until my
fingers
bleed

You must
believe
you’re all
I need

// A.S
find love. find love like the one you dreamed of as a five year old which involves flowers and dates and promises. and for a minute just forget what happened in your last relationship. find love like the one that existed in the fairy tales books your father used to read out to you everyday before bed. find love you believe in. find love you want to write stories and poems about. find love you’d tell your daughter to chase. find love you would choose without having second thoughts. find love you just don’t just have to settle for. find love worth waiting for. find love.
—  find love/random thoughts
I keep thinking about this river somewhere, with the water moving really fast. And these two people in the water, trying to hold onto each other, holding on as hard as they can, but in the end it’s just too much. The current’s too strong. They’ve got to let go, drift apart. That’s how it is with us. It’s a shame….because we’ve loved each other… But in the end, we can’t stay together forever.
—  Kazuo Ishiguro, Never Let Me Go
his eyes might not be the color of the ocean, but i drown in them every time.
—  him.
please, for just once in your life go for the guy who makes you happy and not the one who is a challenge.
go for the one who is cute and sweet, and not for the one who thinks that ignoring you will make things more interesting.
go for the one who will treat you like a queen, and not the one who thinks that you’re just like every other girl.
go for the one who is ready to choose you forever, not the one who can’t choose between you and several others.
go for the one who will make you see your worth and not the one who will make you question it.
—  e.s. // go for ‘that’ guy. please.

i don’t know why

but,

every time i see you.
every time i think of you.
every time i hear you.
every time i walk by you.

i can’t help but break down because you are still my whole world, but now i’m not even a piece of yours.

—  sarn