nervess

Imagine Dean getting all nerved up about proposing to Castiel...

“Dean, is there something wrong?” Castiel asked Dean who was visibly shaking a little, sweat beading on his forehead.

“Y-yeah, Cas… I’m fine…” Dean stuttered as he played with the small box in his pocket. His hands were sweaty and his body felt numb with nervessness. He took a deep, shuttery breath to try and calm himself. They walked along the beach, the sun setting, casting pinks and purples and reds and oranges and yellows to paint the sky. They walked in a comfortable silence. They looked out at the deep blue ocean water, Castiel leaned into his boyfriend, resting his head on his shoulder.

“I love you.” The smaller boy says in a quiet voice. Dean turned his head to kiss the top of his lovers.

“I love you too.” He mumbled softly into Castiel’s dark hair. He smiled as he wrapped his arm around his waist, shortly joind by the other as he hugs his blue eyed beauty. “Cas…?” He asks in a small voice. Castiel looks up from the taller mans chest.

“Yes, Dean?” He asks, tilting his head ever so slightly and squinting his eyes, brows furrowed. Dean had began sweating bullets again and his breathing was uneven, “Dean… Are you sure youre okay?” He asks. Dean gives a weak smile and chuckles nervously.

“Y-yeah, Cassie… I-I’m fine…” He reassures Cas, his voice shaking, “Just nervous is all…” He looks down to the side of them before quickly looking back up and into the bluest blue hes even known and seen. Dean kisses Castiel sweetly and passionately, “Cas… I-I love you so much…” Dean begins, a bead of sweat slowly running down his temple, “I love you so much, and I want to spend the rest of my life with the man I love. We’ve been through so much, bad times, good times, even sad times… But we made it past those times…” He was speaking fast, some of his words sluring together. Castiel smiled, confused at what Dean was getting at.

“Dean-” He was cut off by Dean who had put a shaky hand up to silence him.

“I-I’m not finished…” He tells him and Cas nods for Dean to continue. “Cas, I know I was in denial for so long, but you were the one to bring me out and show me a good time… Make me feel things that I was denying I wanted to feel…” Dean chuckled and shifted his weight, he played with the ring box once again, running a shaky thumb over the black velvet fabric, “I’m glad I met you five years ago today… I dont think Id be the same person of who I am today without you,” Dean let out a short breathy chuckle and a small smile. He pulled the small black box out of his pocket and got down on one knee, he held out the box and opened it with a shaky hand. His palms were sweaty and he felt like a thousand pounds were on top of him. His eyes watered a bit and he took another shaky breath, “What I-I’m t-trying t-to say h-here i-is…” He takes yet another shuttery breath and sniffles, “Castiel James Nokvak… Will you make me the happiest man on E-Earth and m-marry m-m-me?” He stutters and trips and falls over his words. Castiel just stood there in shock, tears running down his cheeks.

“D-Dean…” He says in a crackly voice, just barely above a whisper.

“Please say something, Cas!” Dean says after a few minutes of silence, nothing to be heard but Castiels whimpers as he cried silently. Castiel laughs, forgetting to say his answer out loud.

“O-of course I wi-will, Dean!” Castiel cries and drops to his knees in the sand in front Dean, hugging him tightly and kissing him.

“I love you, Cas…”

“I love you too, Dean…”

big audition tomorrow

really scared. like, nervous scared. what will the panel be like? will they be mean or kind? will they crack jokes, laugh at mine, or want me to be strict as all hell? will it be formal? will i have to sing before the interview, or after? these are just some of the thousand unanswerable questions in my mind. i need to calm down.

also, i lost a follower while i was out to dinner. doesn’t help my calm. bah.