nerd hipster

Canon Physical Traits of the Gangsey

GANSEY
- very tan
- would look great standing on a yacht
- fantastically styled brown hair
- hazel eyes, sometimes with nerd glasses (actual-nerd, not hipster-nerd)
- classically handsome anglo-american bone structure
- arm muscles worthy of the gods
- hollywood smile
- polo shirts in a range of pastels and brights
- elitist shoes

ADAM
- also very tan
- short hair somewhere in the chromatic range of dirty blond to light brown
- “pretty” blue eyes
- taller than Gansey but shorter than Ronan
- lean/lanky with narrow shoulders
- “gaunt”
- very pale eyebrows (and probably very pale lashes because of how genes work)
- looks like he fought in the Civil War (both in appearance and tiredness level)
- serious/sad expression

NOAH
- “smudgy”, whatever the hell that means
- blond hair, presumably in whatever style was popular for rich white boys in the mid-2000’s
- small eyes and large ears
- always wearing school uniform
- looks like a decaying ghoul when viewed from an unflattering angle

BLUE
- short and choppy dark hair with bangs and lots of clips
- large eyes
- generally hot, according to Adam and Gansey at least
- approx. 5 feet tall
- dresses like she has watched every youtube video on how to “upcycle” your clothing

RONAN
- blue eyes and dark eyebrows
- buzzed hair and back tattoo, obviously
- pale skin that begs for a sunburn
- chiseled nose
- chiseled muscles
- “handsome”, according to everyone
- marginally taller than Adam and considerably taller than Gansey
- either scowling grumpily or smiling smirkily
- usually wearing a tight af black tank top and edgy distressed jeans
- can grow a beard in like under a week

HENRY
- cheekbones that could slice off your entire face
- flawless eyebrows
- hair that doesn’t believe in gravity
- actual model

Mbti Types as Millennials You’ll Meet

Disclaimer: this post is purely for amusement & LOLs ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ 

ISTJ: TRADITIONALIST 
- has a fetish for Mon-Fri 9 to 5 jobs + benefits 
- traditional AF 
- this species is v endangered, please donate 
- has had the same goals and dreams since they were a fetus 
- productive member of society™ 

 ESTJ: YUPPIE
- working 27/9 on multiple projects, multiple jobs & multiple underlings to command
- getting more stuff done than you’ll ever do in your lifetime
- somehow has a neater desk than you but knows how to party it up when they’re finally off hours
- fav type of party is a networking party
- actually has time and money to Netflix 

 INTJ: COLLECTORS
- is on all the social medias but almost never posts
- knows all the tings but never really says it
- v secretive
 - will low-key become a billionaire overnight for starting a very important company that no one has heard of 

 ENTJ: YOUR BOSS
- is the only person who actually knows what they’re doing
- started taking on leadership roles since birth (re: shoved the doctor out of the way to cut their own umbilical cord)
- shows love via loud criticism – is only trying to help you help yourself
- so DONEEE with incompetence 

 ISFJ: MILLENNIAL MOM
- shares so many Facebook posts that fb definitely knows who they voted for/where they shop at/intimate details even they don’t know
- actually writes Amazon reviews (thank you)
- replies to all messages from fam within 30 seconds
- attends annual mom convention just to maintain their status (Level 10 Mom Friend™) 

 ESFJ: FOODIES
- has multiple social platforms to display their culinary skills (STATUS: black belt)
- charming AF but WILL throw shade if provoked
- hair is goals
- listed on Huffington Post as top 21 Pinterest users to follow 

 INTP: THE FUTURE™
- obsessed with the possibilities of the future
- topics all INTPs are pre-programmed to get excited about: AI, start-ups, technology, STEM jokes
- may combust when stupid arguments are portrayed as facts
- procrastination level: over 9000 

 ENTP: BROGRAMMERS
- speaks a foreign language invented by them
- beer parties & philosophical debates are always lit
- pretty WOKE actually
- Nerd™ 

 INFJ: MODERN HIPSTER
- had first quarter life crisis at 15
- your official therapist
- writes self-love/compassion/know-yourself/nostalgia posts for a website
- stares through a window from time to time looking contemplative 

 ENFJ: GRASSROOTS CHAMPION
- actually has their life together despite repeat quarter life crises
- persuasive AF
- “I do what I want, I don’t need your validation … but also I consider how it affects everyone around me and how I’ll be perceived”
- won Volunteer of the Year award every year for the last 5 years; got promoted to presenting the Volunteer of the Year award instead 

 ENFP: EXUBERANTS
- lives off of the Likes of friends and random Internet strangers
- needs social validation through an IV drip
- will most likely die of FOMO
- life motto: pics or it didn’t happen
- golden retriever but looks like a person (cute either way) 

 INFP: UNDEREMPLOYED
- Feelings™
- overqualified for all the jobs but doesn’t know what jobs they actually care enough to apply for
- posts are always either WOKE AF or self-deprecating
- hopes and dreams are on life support 

 ESTP: WANDERLUST™
- bucket-list longer than Santa’s list
- only has semi-naked pics on Tinder
- knows the most important words in every language (i.e. “what’s your phone number”)
- no honey, don’t call them; yes, they’re definitely seeing other people 

 ISTP: SHUT OUTs
- self-employed
- will low-key land a steady 6 figure job for being in the right place at the right time 
- moonlights as a hand model
- credit card ebills show 20% of income spent on Redbull/coffee 

 ESFP: YOUTUBE VLOGGER
- EXTRA AF™
- somehow amassed a HUGE following from weekly 10 minute videos about their day
- will fake their death if no one is paying attention to them
- actually really savage
- sparkly 

 ISFP: PROFESSIONAL SELFIES TAKER
- living embodiment of the word “aesthetic”
- hair/style/make-up/art is goals
- snapchat game is on point
- etsy is only their side hussle
- flower crowns filters 

Zodiac Signs as High School Clichés

Aries: Detention kid always getting into trouble

Taurus: Random kid who’s friends with everybody

Gemini: Social butterfly

Cancer: Teacher’s pet

Leo: Drama Club president everyone likes

Virgo: Shy kid with good grades

Libra: Flirt who’s always in a relationship

Scorpio: Weird loner who nobody likes

Sagittarius: Popular jock

Capricorn: Quiet nerd no one talks to

Aquarius: Hipster

Pisces: Anime Club member