neeps and tatties

anonymous asked:

You all are so talented. This one is for the Modern Glasgow world. We've seen a few of Jamie's incidences from the books in this story and how Claire helped him through it. Could we see one of Claire's and how Jamie reacts and helps her?

anonymous asked: Hi! Love Modern Glasgow! We’ve seen some of Jamie’s misadventures from the book get translated into this story. Could we see one of Claire’s? How does Jamie and the family react?

Modern Glasgow AU

“And ye’re sure ye dinna need some extra help? There’s no shame in asking – the drought this year has made it hard for everyone.”

“I ken that – but I’ll manage.” Joe Fraser extended his work-roughened hand to grip Jamie’s. “And I thank ye for yer offer. But Rosie and me – weel, we always plan for this. The coos will have a bit of a lean year, but nobody will starve.”

Jamie nodded and opened the driver door of his battered Land Rover. “We’re settled at the Big House now – I’m just a phone call away.”

“Oh, that’s right! Ye and the missus and how many bairns, now? Three?”

“Five,” Jamie laughed. “Can ye believe it?”

Joe slid his hands into his pockets, shaking his head. “Mary, Michael, and Bride! Yer poor wife.”

“She had more of a say in it than I did, Joe. She kent weel what she was I for when she took up wi’ me. And she’s the head doctor at the clinic in Broch Mordha now – but I’m sure ye’ve heard already. Broken bones, cuts, you name it and she can fix it.” He slammed the door shut and turned on the ignition, leaning out through the open window to wave goodbye.

“I’ll be back in a week or so – and let me know how the animals are getting on, aye? We always plan for this as weel.”

Joe waved a final hearty goodbye and trudged back to his barn, the setting sun striking the dust brought up by his boots.

Jamie sighed, ran his hands through his hair, and reached for the glove box, fishing around for his phone. Thumbing it to life, he couldn’t help but smile at the lock screen – a selfie Fergus had taken of him and his four siblings. They all had massive grins on their faces, even ten-month-old Julia, proudly showing her five teeth.

It hadn’t been easy adjusting to life in the Scottish Highlands when living in their cramped Glasgow flat – or in Paris, in Fergus’ case – had been the only life his children had ever known. But he and Claire knew they had made the right decision – right for their family, and right for the two of them. Selling his stake in the printing business had netted quite the tidy sum, and she was more than willing to give up her high-pressure surgery job for a quieter pace at the rural clinic. That they both spent much more time with the children – watching them grow, guiding them, showing them how to live – made every single sacrifice worth it.

But now Jamie frowned – ten missed calls, just in the hour or so he’d spent with Joe.

Four from the Big House’s number. Two from Fergus. Two from Jenny. One each from Ian and Murtagh.


He swallowed and quickly called Murtagh.

“Thank God,” his godfather’s voice crackled through the line. “Ye need to come home.”

Jamie’s heart stopped. “What is it? The bairns?”

“No, lad. No. They’re fine. It’s Claire.”

With shaking hands, Jamie activated the Range Rover’s BlueTooth and tore out of poor Joe’s driveway.

“Tell me everything!” he desperately shouted into the speakerphone, swerving around the potholes in the dirt road connecting Joe’s farm to the motorway.

“She got a call, around midday. An old woman having heart trouble – perhaps a stroke. She left the number here and drove out to make a house call.”

Jamie roared down the motorway, limbs shaking.

“When she didna come back an hour ago, we started calling her mobile. No answer. And then Jenny called the woman’s house – her son said she was fine, and that Claire had left two hours before that, and said she was coming straight home. So nobody has seen or heard from her for three hours.”

“We need to go find her!” Jamie screamed, passing two sedans full of tourists and simply not caring that he was at double the speed limit.

“Aye, lad. We do. Calm down. I’ve got Ian and Jenny and Suzette here, waiting for ye. We can each drive out and search. Fergus wants to go – ”

“No. Put him on the phone. Please. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

Muffled sounds – then Fergus’ surprisingly deep voice. Jamie blinked, remembering that his eldest son was now eighteen. A man grown.


“Listen to me, Fergus. Do yer brother and sisters ken what’s going on?”

“No – they’ve been playing with their cousins. I want to help you search - ”

“No, Fergus. You must stay behind. They canna know what’s going on. Do you understand?”

“But –”

“Damn it, Fergus. You need to protect them. They need an adult to watch over them – to keep them safe. And that adult – that *man* - that’s you, *mon fils*.” Do ye understand me?”

Silence. Then – “Yes. I understand.”

“Good lad. I’m just turning off the road. Can ye ask them to meet me outside?”

Thirty seconds later, he pulled up to the main house and jumped out of the Land Rover, leaving the engine running. It was full dark now, but he recognized the silhouettes waiting in the driveway.

No time to feel, now. Just to think – and to act. And to find Claire.

Five agonizing minutes to plan – four separate cars, driven by Jamie, Ian, Jenny, and Murtagh. Suzette would ride with her husband and continue calling all the places where Claire could have gone – including Mrs. Crook in the main house, just in case Claire appeared at home.

Ian handed each driver their own walkie-talkie – the best way to communicate, given the patchy mobile service.

Then their caravan crunched down the gravel driveway and back to the main road, tracing Claire’s movements.

So many memories flashed in front of Jamie’s eyes – Claire burning dinner in their first apartment; Claire bravely introducing her family to her ex-fiancee, just a few months before; Claire’s ecstatic smile as she showed him William for the first time; Claire’s beautiful face, just this morning, as he gave her what they had come to call a Full English Breakfast…

If she was gone –


For the bairns’ sake, he would push on. But not for his own.

So he prayed, fervently, in every language he knew. For God had brought them together – why would He dare to pull them apart?

Up and down the small country lanes, high beams bobbing in the pitch dark.

A light drizzle had started.

Was she cold? Was she shivering?

He kept dialing her mobile. Over and over. And every time it went straight to voicemail.

“You’ve reached Dr. Claire Fraser. I’m not available at the moment – ”

“You’ve reached Dr. Claire Fraser – ”

There was no life without her.

“You’ve reached – ”

And then he turned a corner – and she was there.

Face glowing with the soft light emanating from the boot of her Volvo, rummaging around for something.

It took everything Jamie had to not run off the road as he slammed on the brake and fell out of the car, running toward his wife like a man possessed.


Then he caught her up in a tremendous bear hug, and didn’t let her go.

“Are ye all right? For God’s sake, Claire, are ye all right?”

“No,” she gasped. “Jamie – you’re crushing me.”

So he did let go – and her face swam with his tears.

“Hush,” she whispered, framing his face with cold hands. “Hush. It’s all right now. I’ve just got two flat tires and no mobile service. I’m fine.”

“Are ye all right? Truly?”

“Yes,” she said softly, patiently. “I’m cold and I’m starving. You didn’t happen to bring any food, did you? I could murder some neeps and tatties right about now.”

He let out a strangled laugh, and kissed her long and hard.

“Ye gave me quite the fright,” he whispered against her temple. “I did think ye were maybe dead.”

“Why are you so dramatic?” she teased, digging her hands in the back pockets of his jeans. “You know I can fend for myself.”

“Aye, I do. But – ” he swallowed.

“Hush, love. I know.”

Ten seconds – he counted and cherished every one of her heartbeats.

“I need to be inside ye now, Claire. I – I need to feel whole.”

She kissed him gently. “Tonight. Let’s get home. I want you to take care of me. Can you do that?”

“Aye,” he pledged. “Aye, I can do that.”

She nodded. “Good. Now can you please tell whoever is on the walkie that I’m all right, and I need a tow? I just want to go home, and kiss the children, and then be one with you.”

He inhaled the curls at the top of her head – damp with the rain – and trotted back to the Land Rover. Murmured a few words into the walkie – and Claire couldn’t help but smile when four cheers crackled back.

“And don’t think I won’t scold ye when we get home,” Jamie admonished. “I’m just too happy to have ye here wi’ me to say anything else. But don’t think ye’re getting off easy for scaring me half to death.”

She sauntered over and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I look forward to it,” she whispered, grinding her hips against his.

He playfully smacked her bum, then wrapped her legs around his hips and hoisted her up against him, leaning against the Land Rover, devouring her mouth.

Not even the beeps and high beams and cheers of Ian, Jenny, Murtagh, and Suzette broke them apart.

“Shall we leave the two of ye out here alone, then?” Murtagh jibed – silently sagging with relief against Suzette.

Claire pulled away, grinning. “If I knew it took me disappearing for him to get all riled up like this – I’d do it more often!”

“No’ bloody likely,” Jamie growled, pulling his wife back for more.

I had to order #haggis again because the gentleman next me and his lady thoroughly enjoyed theirs. I’m glad I did! This is made quite differently from the one I had a few nights ago; different but just as good. Also, “neeps and tatties” are turnips and potatoes! - Harry #FamilyRecipe #ScottishFood #Scotland

Fun things to eat and drink if you visit Scotland...

Because I miss home…

1. Irn Bru.

Not even a stereotype. We Scots drink a shedload of shit. Packed full of sugar and a guaranteed hangover cure (we swear by it). Of course, some Scottish people are actually concerned about their health so we do have sugar free options. They taste just as good. We actually have it on tap in pubs and people often mix it with vodka. It’s great!

2. Haggis. 

Now I’m not a huge fan personally. Haggis is made from sheep innards wrapped in intestines. It sounds gross but there’s a fascinating story behind it. It came about in the 18th Century when farmers were struggling to yield crops in the harsh Scottish climate so the mentality was very much waste not want not, so they used the leftovers from the sheep that they couldn’t sell, mixed it with oats and spices and baked it. We have it on the 25th January, to celebrate our poet, Robert Burns’ birthday. He wrote a poem about it, called Adress To a Haggis. We eat it with mashed potato and mashed turnips (we call it Haggis, Neeps and Tatties).

3. Square Sausage

It’s actually known as Lorne sausage and I have no idea what it’s made from but it doesn’t taste like normal sausage. It’s awesome and you have to try it. Order a Scottish breakfast and you’ll get one of these. They’re great because they actually fit into a roll without making a massive mess. 

4. Tablet

Not actual tablets. We have a reputation for being junkies but aren’t actually. It’s a dessert made from condensed milk and it’s amazing. Again, full of sugar, so probably not recommended for diabetics! It’s similar to fudge but crumblier and much better. It’s dry, compared to fudge. It’s very sickly, which is probably a good thing because it’s so full of sugar! It’s my ultimate comfort food. 

5. Macaroni Pies. 

They sound horrific but they’re actually really good. I can’t really say more than that because it is what it says on the tin! 

6. Shortbread

Crumbly biscuits, made with butter. Very nice, very moreish and great to dip into tea!

7. Tattie Scones

Sometimes known as potato scones, these are baked potato mixed with like bread or something. Again, they’re a staple of Scottish breakfasts and they’re great for mopping up egg yolk. People eat them in rolls with fried eggs. 

8. Macaroons

Not the French kind. These were the originals. I always used to be told that they were made with mashed potato but they’re not! It’s a sort of coconut ice wrapped in chocolate and sprinkled with dessicated coconut. They’re not as good as tablet but definitely worth a try!

9. Tunnock’s Tea Cakes

They’re basically like those marshmallow cakes with jam in the middle and a biscuit base, wrapped in milk chocolate. Not my personal favourite but a Scottish classic and Tunnock’s is a big Scottish brand. 

10. Tunnock’s Caramel Wafers

Accept no substitutions. These are amazing. They’re like kit kats but with caramel and they have vanilla essence in them so they smell awesome too. It’s hard not to like these!

So there we have it, the top ten Scottish foods that you have to try should you visit. 


Haggis with neeps and tatties, Fresh potato pancake with Scottish smoked salmon, and Seared sea scallop with spinach-cheddar gratin and crispy bacon from the Scotland Booth available during the Epcot International Food & Wine Festival.

You rotters ask this question to the point I’m startin’ to wonder about a few of ye. I’m just a hungry bloke who don’t discriminate between what I’m takin’ a bite outta. But you lot got some kind of obsession with knowing what this guy or that berk tastes like!

So here’s what we’re gonna do.

I went out and prepped some samples of folks ye been asking after. And YOU can take a nibble and see what ye think. Ready?

All the creeps minced up, spiced up, stuffed into the stomach of a satyr, and simmered for a good three hours! You can supply your own neeps and tatties, though. Don’t bring that veggie rubbish into my kitchen.

Oh, and before you ask, no. No mud golems included in this. Ain’t nothin’ meaty about them and ain’t nothin’ fun about a mouthful of clay.

It’s always exceptionally odd when the one askin’ after a hero’s taste is the hero himself. Well, since Viper’s feelin’ a pinch auto-cannibalistic today, I’ve gone ahead and prepared a nice tender circle cut of him!

Fair warning; eatin’ this stuff runs a high chance of you sittin’ in the bog for upwards of an hour. Turns out we shouldn’t be eatin’ things steeped in venom; who’d of suspected?

All the joy of preparing and smelling and seeing a meal, none of the calories! Vanishes into smoke at the first bite! The swell taste of disappointment.

Get bent, Azwraith.

A nicely roasted Bane wing…arm? Wing. Let’s stick with wing. A nicely roasted Bane wing seasoned with cracked pepper! And no, it never stops moving or oozin’ black stuff. Just eat it in chunks. Don’t be a sissy.

Also, you might have a bit of an unpleasant night after chewin’ up some of this. Just a heads up.



Uhh. I got a chunk of the bugger and left it to marinate for a few hours. And I guess somewhere along the way, it started doin’…this. This thing. Whatever all this is.

You’re still welcome to try it, though.

I don’t really know what you were expectin’.

I think this is one you’ve got the means to solve on your own, mate.

Thursday 20.12.12 /// 19h-22h

Every week we’ll be serving Scottish Haggis the traditional way with ‘neeps (turnips/Steckrüben) and tatties (potatoes/Kartoffeln).

We have small tasting plates for 4,50€ and larger meal size plates for 7€, served with an optional (but delicious) whisky cream sauce.

It’s winter, it’s cold, and this is the stuff that will heat you up and keep you warm. Best enjoyed with malt whisky… Don’t be shy, it’s really lovely stuff!

We have veggie haggis too ♥