needs counseling

anonymous asked:

So my Daddy likes to hit me randomly, like we'll be sitting on the couch and then he'll just pull me over his lap and spank me even if I haven't done anything wrong... But the other day he wanted ~special time~ but I didn't and he made me but he told me that daddy's word is final which I get but now I feel dirty and gross... I dunno... Help?

When it comes to sex… if you say no and he does it anyways, thats rape, which is why you feel dirty and gross. you need to get to counseling….oh and you are being abused, whether you want to admit it to yourself or not. 

If hes acting like a jock in a lockeroom at inappropriate times or just simply striking you out of nowhere… you are being abused.

Daddys word is not final.. and he is not always right:

https://mistersbeard.tumblr.com/post/140026786958/mistersbeard-not-all-rules-should-be-followed

7 Childhood Issues that Affect our Later Relationships

1. Threats and fear of abandonment. These can lead to jealousy and feelings of insecurity.

2. Lack of emotional nurturing. This can lead to feelings of emotional deprivation – which can feel like a bottomless pit to fill.

3. Growing up with feelings of entitlement. This can lead to feeling as if you don’t have to live by the same rules as others – as you are special, and a bit superior.

4. Being told that you’re inferior or inadequate. This causes you feel like you’re never good enough.

5. The demand to be perfect, and to always get things right. This can leading to being driven – and incredibly high standards.

6. Being betrayed by those you trusted – so you won’t trust now, and you can’t get close to others, or let them get close to you.

7. Being raised is a way that your needs were denied, not allowed, disregarded, trivialised or ignored. This can lead to a doormat type of personality where other people matter – and your needs never count.

People Who Deserved Better in 13 Reasons Why

-Jeff Atkins
-Hannah Baker
-Zach Dempsey (what he did was wrong and inexcusable-but he has a kind heart and truly is a nice guy. He’s just surrounded by the wrong people.)
-Jeff Atkins
-Mrs. Baker (and Mr. Baker)
-Hannah Baker
-T o n y
-Jeff Atkins
-Clay Jensen tbh
-All the kids who needed counseling (because Mr. Porter was a fucking idiot)
-Hannah Baker
-J E F F A T K I N S

Ten Basic Rules For Better Living
by Manly P. Hall

1. Stop worrying

The popular idea that a worrier is a thoughtful and conscientious citizen is false. The Egyptians realized this when they included worry among the cardinal sins. Do not confuse thoughtfulness and worry. The thoughtful person plans solutions, but the worrier merely dissolves in his own doubt. If you think straight, you will have less cause for worrying. The worrier not only suffers the same disaster many times, but undermines his health and annoys all others with whom he comes into contact. There are many things in this world that require thoughtful consideration, but there is really nothing to fear but fear.

2. Stop trying to dominate and posses your friends and relatives

Each of us likes to feel that he is running his own life. The moment we recognize the rights of others to seek life, liberty, and happiness according to their own dreams, hopes, and aspirations, we begin to conserve our own resources. It is very debilitating to give advice which is ignored or rejected, and equally disappointing to attempt to posses and dominate persons who immediately resent and combat our dictatorial tendencies. We are hurt when they do not see things our way. If we save advice for ourselves and those who seek it from us, and who are therefore grateful, all concerned will be the better.

3. Moderate ambition

There is a tendency to overlook natural and simple blessings while we plunge on toward distant goals. Each individual has certain capacities. If he can recognize his own abilities and work with them, he can attain personal security. If, however, he is constantly seeking that which is not reasonably attainable, he can never know happiness or contentment. The wise man observes the disastrous results of uncontrollable ambitions, and chooses moderation. It is not necessary to be famous in order to be happy, nor must one be the leading citizen in the community in order to gratify ones social instinct. The ambitious usually pay too much for what they get, and are the more miserable after they get it.

4. Do not accumulate more than you need

There is no real distinction in being the richest man in the graveyard. Many earnest citizens act as though there were pockets in shrouds. We are supposed to have outgrown the primitive belief that we should bury a mans goods with him so that his spirit might enjoy them in the afterworld. Here, again, the middle course is the wisest. Let us reserve some of our energy for enjoyment, and not give all of ourselves to the task of accumulation. Many a man who has made a million has not lived to spend it. A rich life can be more practical than a monumental bank account.

5. Learn to relax

Great tension is an abomination. The more tense we become, the more stupidly we are likely to act, and, according to the old Buddhists, stupidity is a cardinal sin. Today, many so-called efficient people are perpetually on the verge of a nervous breakdown. This is not so likely to be due to overwork as to unreasonable driving impulses from within themselves. Some say that they are overtaxing their resources to keep their jobs or to maintain extravagant families. Whether you believe it or not, you are a better producer and a better provider if you do not collapse from psychic exhaustion at some critical moment when you are most in need of good health. If your associates do not realize this, they may be in need of practical counsel.

6. Cultivate a sense of humor

As never before, we must brighten and lighten the corners where we are. The more seriously we take ourselves and our responsibilities, the duller we become. It is a saving grace to realize that, although living is a serious matter, we can take it too seriously. Also bear in mind that genuine humor is not bitter, cynical, or critical. It is the ability to laugh with the world and not at the world. If we must laugh at someone, let it be ourselves. Humor is a spice to living. It adds flavor to work, zest to play, charm to self-improvement, and proves to others that we have a security within ourselves. A sincere, happy laugh, like the joyous rippling of childrens laughter, relieves tension and restores good nature. Incidentally, it makes friends and inspires confidence.

7. Find a reason for your own existence

Unless you believe in something bigger than yourself, have some purpose more vital than accumulation or advancement in business or society, you are only existing, not living. A simple pattern is to realize that the laws of Nature that put you here seem to be primarily concerned with growth. You are a success to the degree that you grow, and you grow to the degree that you become a wiser, more useful, and more secure person. In other words, we live to learn, and by this very process, we learn to live. Broaden your horizon, develop an interest in all that is fine, beautiful, and purposeful. Great internal good comes from the love for music, art, great literature, broad philosophy, and simple faith. Strengthen the inside of your nature, and the outside will be better.

8. Never intentionally harm another person

Never by word or deed return evil for good, or evil for evil. Weed negative and destructive thoughts and emotions out of your personality, or they will ultimately contribute to your misery. As we look around us, we see the tragic results of individuals and nations that harbor grudges or nurse the instincts for revenge. The harmless life saves those who live it from many of the mortal shocks that flesh is heir to. Our critical attitudes and our long memories of evils that others have caused only reduce our present efficiency and endanger health and vitality. Even the selfish man realizes that he cannot afford to keep a grudge, and the unselfish simply will not permit grudges to accumulate because they know better and they believe better.

9. Beware of anger

When ill-temper controls us, we are no longer able to control ourselves. In a moment of anger, we may create a situation which will require years to remedy. Why should we spend our time trying to recover from our own mistakes? If we disapprove, let us state our case simply and quietly, and remember that we should never try to correct another when we have already committed a fault as great as his. A quick temper is a serious handicap in business or in the home. It is useless to say that we cannot control anger. This is as much as to admit that we have lost the power to control ourselves. If we resent the unkindness of others and the collective irritability of this generation, let us make sure that we are not one of the irritating factors.

10. Never blame others for our own mistakes

It is hardly necessary. Each of us seems to have an incredible capacity to do things badly and select unwisely. Actually, we are in trouble because we have not made constructive use of the power and abilities which we received as a birthright. Others can hurt us only while our inner life is too weak to sustain in the presence of trial or test. Instead of resenting misfortunes, and seeking to excuse our own limitations, we must face the facts. Either we are stronger than the problem and can solve it intelligently, or the problem is stronger than we are, and the only solution is to increase our own strength. Others are not to blame for our unhappiness. Each man must seek his own peace of mind, and, as the Arabian Nights so well expressed it, happiness must be earned.

MYSTIC MESSENGER AS ONION HEADLINES
  • Jumin: Asshole Admits To Being Asshole In Supreme Asshole Move
  • Yoosung: All Kidding Aside, Area Man Really Needs Counseling
  • Jaehee: Woman Can't Wait To Get Home And Take Off Uncomfortable Persona
  • 707: Laughter Now Exclusively Used To Mask Feelings
  • ZEN: Narcissist Mentally Undresses Self
  • Rika: I Shouldn't Be Alive But I Am
  • V: Beautiful Cinnamon Roll Too Good For This World, Too Pure
  • Unknown: Man Too Exhausted To Repress Both Anger And Sadness
  • Vanderwood: This Shit Again
  • MC: Somebody Should Do Something About All The Problems
Don't make my girlfriend cry.

(warning: long story)

Okay, so this was a good few years ago, back when I was in high school.

In case my username didn’t give it away, I am happily and openly gay af, and I came out at about 14, around year 9 in highschool (I’m British). And from that second on, I was even more of a target.

I was already the preferred bullying target. The school was aware of it, they were also aware that my family didn’t take kindly to this (in my previous school, my Mum had brought the police into school on the day where the younger kids were coming to see if they wanted to go there, because they weren’t doing anything about me being bullied) so pulled a big huff and puff smoke screen to try and make it seem like they were fixing the issue, though they never did anything.

I had plenty of small ‘regular’ or 'petty’ revenges throughout my years. Getting people kicked out of classes, forced into counselling, etc etc. But this is the big one.

Keep reading

IF A MEDICAL TREATMENT DOESN’T WORK, IT DOES NOT FUCKING MEAN YOU AREN’T TRYING!!!

EVEN WITH THE SAME ILLNESS, NOT EVERYONE IS THE SAME!!! SOME PEOPLE NEED MEDICINE!!! SOME PEOPLE NEED COUNSELLING!!! SOME PEOPLE NEED PHYSICAL THERAPY!!! THERE ARE LOADS OF DIFFERENT WAYS TO GET BETTER AND YOUR NEEDS ARE INDIVIDUAL AND VALID!!! IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH!!!

Road Trip

Rick tricked Stan into a ‘vacation outing’ when really they needed some major counseling from Carol in the middle of space because they wouldn’t agree with anywhere else.

Caffeine Challenge #17

Hi, all! I had a little trouble getting started, but I like where it went! You can read mine below or here (X)



Geneva stands on the outskirts of the town she built and feels the hostility radiating from the closed doors, the shuttered windows, the empty streets. There silence echoes out to her, accuses her, and she can see graffiti over the town’s sign. She doesn’t need to see it to know what it says.

The rebellion is successful. The Queen has fallen. Wanted dead.

It’s not a new thing, to be wanted dead. She’s been wanted dead by any number of people since she was very small. At least now there’s a reason for it.

She turns her back on the town (It’s already turned its back on her.) and shakes her head. She’s not resentful – far from it.

This is what she planned, after all.

———————————

It starts when she’s looking up (and up and up) at her brother. He’s regal and imposing, even with limbs that are too long, too thin, too weak. He changes the last part slowly, builds muscle like her father builds their kingdom, with sweat and dedication and something feral in their breast.

She looks up at him and thinks, You’re going to die. They’re going to kill you and you’re going to let them.

Turns out she’s half right. He lets his murderer put him down, lets the knife pierce his breast, lets them take the life from his eyes.

But they don’t kill him. She does.

Keep reading

7 Anger Management Tips

1. Think before you speak as you can’t take back your words.

2. Don’t say anything until you’re feeling calm. We often regret what we say when we are mad.

3. Be simple and clear when you express what bothered you. Don’t be disrespectful, rude or hyper-critical.

4. Choose to leave the room or to distract yourself when you feel your emotions are really being stirred.

5. Try, if you can, to get some exercise as that reduces stress, and changes physiology.

6. Think about the people you enjoy being with, as that will remind you that not everyone is bad.

7. Try to plan ahead so you have some strategies when your feel the anger rising, and you need to take control.

shit mentally ill people get told
  • “that’s just being human!!”
  • “why do you need counseling/medicine though”
  • “it’s not THAT bad!!!!11!!!11!11!!!!!!1!!!1″
  • “that’s not a real disease”
  • “it’s not that you cant do it, youre just not trying” [even if you say you are trying 348928394380 times]
  • “you dont actually have that disease, youre just overreacting”
  • “you just dont care” or “you just need to try harder”

feel free to add more

9 Stones

There is a time, a time to love
A time to sing, a time to shine
A time to leave, a time to stay
There is a time, a time to cry
A time to love, a time to live
There is a time, a time to sing
A time to love

~Mumford & Sons

It was bound to happen. Especially to me.  I verbally process everything and take things personally. Too personally.  

I was bound to end up in counseling.  

It was good.  The lady sitting opposite of me didn’t know me at all. She didn’t know my work.  Had no idea what kind of nurse I am.  She didn’t know what happened every single day at work. She didn’t know I was a senior nurse with more experience than 70% of the nurses I work with.

She asked me how long I had been an ICU nurse and she jerked back to look at me in surprise when I said quietly “Almost 7 years.”  

I knew she was expecting me to have been a nurse barely a year or maybe just at a year.  Surely someone who was 7 years into this sort of career knew what to do and how to survive.  

I always thought I did. I used to bury myself in soccer and sports.  Then I got married and buried myself in that.  Turns out my husband doesn’t want to hear about my day every day.  So I stopped talking about it.  I stopped finding a way to get rid of the mountain of stress that I acquired every time I worked.  It built up.  Until one day when the doctors didn’t listen to me and the patient died- the guilt of thinking I should have done more overwhelmed me.  I stopped sleeping well before shifts.  I would toss and turn half the night.  I turned to sleeping aids.  I would wake up before my alarm and lay there with my eyes wide, dreading the shift.  I would walk into a room with 6.5 years of experience on my shoulders and feel a desperate terror that I had no idea what I was doing.  I would be filled with anxiety and be unsettled.  They gave me an orientee and I panicked.  I couldn’t do it.  I felt overwhelmed and terrified. I took the nurse educator aside and begged to have the orientee switched.  I told her I couldn’t do it and was burnt out.  I told her I was in counseling and needed to get myself straightened out. I was brutally honest and felt a measure of shame that I was so broken.

The counselor listened to me and asked questions here and there.  I cried for a half an hour the first session.  She gave me some tips for coping with the amount of death and suffering I see every shift. She told me to put stones in a jar to memorialize each life that I lost or that was lost when I was there.  So far I have 9 stones.  I actually thought there would be more.  And then I realized that 9 stones is absolutely insane.  Normal people don’t encounter 9 deaths in their lifetime- let alone in a month and a half.  Healthcare personnel deal with death so regularly that 9 sounds like a small number.  But that is 9 families that have lost a loved one.  9 people whose lives have ended.  9 people who I either held their hand or broke their ribs during their final moments.  And, I know the number will climb.  That jar will be filled.  

The counselor talked to me about PTSD and told me that people in healthcare get overlooked.  She said that firemen, rescue workers, nurses, doctors are just as susceptible to PTSD as soldiers.  It’s a different horror- but it is horror just the same.  As she spoke and validated the devastation my soul had been feeling… I felt a small part of me heal.  I wasn’t crazy.  I wasn’t weak.  I was a 31year old nurse whose eyes had seen too much.   I don’t know how many counseling sessions I will go to.  Whether the ones I have had so far will be enough to really help me cope.

I just know that I can’t save lives if I don’t first save my own.

thisloveisastateofgrace  asked:

Hi Katie! I have a question for you. Are you still anti-abortion in cases of rape, incest, or if the life of the mother is in danger? You've probably already answered these, so I'm sorry! But I was just curious as to what your opinion is. 😊

Hi! Thanks for asking! I’m always happy to re-explain my positions, especially on hard cases, because it gives me a chance to practice and to clarify.

Let’s take these one at a time, because they are all very complex.

Rape/Sexual Assault

Rape is wrong. Rape is horrible, evil, despicable…and any other words I can come up with. Rapists should be caught, put on trial, and punished to the fullest extent of the law.

Survivors of rape should be protected. They should be supported, loved, and cared for. They should have access to health care that they need, counseling, and support groups. They should have friends and family around them who love and care for them. If that isn’t the case, communities need to step up and fill those gaps.

We can all generally agree on these things. They aren’t controversial. Pro-life people, pro-choice people, conservatives, liberals, Republicans, Democrats, Libertarians…just about everyone. If someone doesn’t agree with those things, we stare at them like they’ve just grown a second head.

But what about the children of survivors of rape?

This is my friend Patti. We met doing pro-life work while I was in college out in California. She was conceived in rape. Her birth mother chose to place her for adoption, and she grew up loved and cared for. She says:

“I want to say that even though the circumstances of my conception were in violence and hatred, I am not my father, nor am I my mother. I am unique. I was created by a loving God and my life is so valuable. And so is the life of every baby conceived — valuable and a gift from God.“

This is Travon. She was conceived in rape. Her mother raised her instead of choosing adoption, and told her about who her father was after her 18th birthday. Today, she is a speaker, wife, and mother. She travels telling her story and advocating for children like her to be protected under the law.

This is Mary. Her mother had paranoid schizophrenia and was married to a man who also had a mental disability. When her mother was raped, the husband went to the police, but ultimately claimed Mary as his own to protect his wife’s reputation. Because of her mother’s schizophrenia, Mary was cared for by another couple, visiting her birth parents periodically. Eventually, when she was five years old, that couple adopted her.

(More stories at SaveThe1.com)

Do any of these people look like they were conceived in rape? What would that look like? My friend Patti told me that she has heard people refer to those conceived in rape as “devil spawn.” Should they have horns and tails? Should they carry pitchforks?

Or are they children? Teenagers? Adults? Mothers and fathers? Husbands and wives? People?

The circumstances of conception, no matter how violent, how terrible, do not reduce the value of the child conceived. If abortion is wrong because it kills a human being, then it is wrong no matter who that human being’s father is.

What about the mother? Like I said above, I am all in favor of resources and support for survivors of rape. I am all for counseling to help them process and heal. Abortion will not solve their problems. It will not take away their nightmares. It will not take away their fear, their pain. It will only take away the life of their child, who has no guilt in how he or she was conceived.

Meet Darlene. She was not only conceived in rape, but as a teenager she became a victim of child trafficking and became pregnant from rape herself. She says that in order to escape from her captor, she pretended to have an abortion. Now she is married with five children and two grandchildren.

Darlene, despite her own difficult childhood and the way she was forced into motherhood at a young age, has made it her life’s mission to protect the lives of children like her and her oldest child.

She says:

“I am so passionate about the value of every life; whether one is conceived with wine and roses, in a test tube or as a result of violence. I absolutely reject the utilitarian view that people are valuable only if they can contribute to society in arbitrarily contrived ways. We should all hold to the Declaration of Independence’s admonition that each of us is endowed by our Creator with certain inalienable rights: the right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness. These God given rights are consecutive, not concurrent. Without the right to life, nothing else matters.“

I have included all of these stories here not because they prove my point. I include them because these are the real human beings we’re talking about when we talk about abortion in the case of rape. We need to remember these faces, these names, every time someone says “cases of rape are only 1% of abortions, we shouldn’t be a stickler over 1%.” Every time someone says “a pregnancy from rape is only a terrible reminder for the mother.” Every time someone says “abortion is okay for the same reason that rape is wrong, because of bodily autonomy.”

These are the people we’re talking about killing.

Pro-lifers know that abortion kills children and hurts women. So why should we abandon those women and children who have also been hurt by rape to the additional pain and death of abortion?

Incest

This is very similar to the case of rape, and many people put these two together. However, I gave incest its own section so I could deal with what does make it different.

In the case of incest, we have an extra layer of complexity that makes these cases exceptionally painful. In the case of incest, we usually have a young girl who is raped by a close family member, often her own father. She has been scarred in ways that someone who didn’t experience that can never understand. And now she’s pregnant, probably at a very young age.

What do we do?

First, we get her out of that situation as quickly as we can. We get her to a safe place, and we do everything we can to make her feel safe. We don’t want her to be worried about her rapist coming back for her, at least no more than she has to be.

We put her rapist in jail. We make sure that he is punished to the fullest extent of the law. Perhaps we even find comfort in knowing that in prison, he will be rejected even by other criminals for the nature of his crime.

But she’s still pregnant. And she’s still a child. What do we do?

We love and care for her and her child. We find a permanent home for her, through adoption or through other family members if possible. We give her power over the process as much as we can so she feels like she has some control. We talk to her about adoption and parenting, and we let her make the decision. If she chooses parenting, we work with her new guardians to make a plan for her welfare and the child’s. If she chooses adoption, we give her the opportunity to meet potential adoptive parents and choose the family that she wants her child to have. We give her the choice between open and closed adoption, so that she doesn’t feel like her child was taken from her.

We don’t kill her child.

Just like those conceived in rape, people conceived in incest are still people. They are human beings with the same right to life as any other human being. We cannot abandon them either.

If abortion is wrong because it kills a human being, then it is always wrong.

Health/Life of the Mother

This case is almost more complex, because here we get into the definition of abortion. For our purposes, I am defining abortion as a procedure that intentionally takes the life of the preborn child.

There is one case that comes the closest to abortion being necessary, and that is a tubal pregnancy. In these cases, the embryo implants in the fallopian tube. With current medical technology, we have no way to save the child. If we do not intervene, the child will grow, the tube will rupture, and the mother can die from hemorrhaging. So we have to intervene and remove the child from the fallopian tube.

I do not consider this an abortion. Our goal is not to kill the child, but to save the mother. If, someday, we found a way to save the child and the mother, we would do it. But currently, we can’t. A doctor’s job is to save as many patients as possible, but the loss of a patient does not mean the doctor is a murderer. He or she is only guilty of murder if the patient is intentionally killed.

This same reasoning applies to every other case. It is wrong to intentionally kill the child. However, if the child needs to be removed to save the mother’s life, we can do so. We just need to be sure that we are also concerned for the life of the child, and doing everything we can to save that child’s life as well.

Some will argue that late-term abortion is necessary to save mothers, but this makes no sense. Sure, and early delivery might save the life of the mother. But why should dismembering, poisoning, or beheading that child in the process do anything to improve the mother’s health?

For more on this from an actual doctor (which I am not), watch this video of an interview with Dr. Anthony Levatino. Dr. Levatino was an abortionist and is still an OB/GYN. He worked out of a regular practice rather than an abortion clinic, and so he would routinely do an abortion in one room and then talk to a mother who was keeping her child in the other. He saw patients with complicated and high-risk pregnancies. He knew, even then, that abortion was not necessary. In fact, as he says in the video, for late-term patients an abortion is more dangerous than an early delivery. A late-term abortion might take up to three days, while a c-section delivery could take an hour. If the mother’s life is truly in that much danger, which would you choose?

Every case is different when we’re talking about high-risk pregnancies, but we can tackle each of them in a pro-life way by following a simple rule: treat both mother and child as patients. If we are doing that, we will find the best approach that saves the most lives.

I hope this helps! Feel free to ask for any clarification on anything I’ve said here.

and all these little things

ao3 link

robert finds a way to support aaron throughout his counselling sessions.

or, four tuesdays that robert supports aaron, and one tuesday where robert needs his husband.

The first counselling session had lured Robert into a false sense of security. He’d collected Aaron from the counsellor’s office in Leeds, and he’d been okay, he’d been quiet, sure, but he’d been okay - he’d smiled at Robert and suggested lunch in town somewhere before they made the drive back to Emmerdale.

Robert didn’t know much about counselling, if he was honest, beyond what he’d read online when scouring through the infinite list of counsellors Aaron could go and see. Aaron had been the one to agree he needed counselling, but Robert had been the one to find a counsellor for him, in the end.

He hadn’t know what to expect, from Aaron’s sessions, but that first one made him think they wouldn’t be all that bad.

It was the third, when Robert realised it wasn’t going to be an easy road. Maybe it had been completely naive of him to believe they could just muddle along and everything would be okay, even with Aaron having to relive the worst parts of his life over and over, have someone pick them apart and put him back together all over again.

Aaron was quiet, when Robert came in from work. He’d driven himself to counselling that afternoon, Robert stuck in meetings for Home James until the earning evening time.

“Hiya,” Robert greeted, setting his laptop and folder down on the kitchen table, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of Aaron’s head. His husband flinched away from Robert’s touch, and instantly, Robert was worried. “How was your day?”

“How do you think?” Aaron snapped, not looking up from the cold cup of tea he was holding tightly to.

Robert wasn’t really sure what to say. “Have you had tea?” he tried, hoping it would elicit a better reaction.

“‘M not hungry.” Aaron shook his head, shoving his chair backward. “I’m going to bed.”

“It’s six o’clock, Aaron.”

“So? Are you tryin’ to tell me when I can and can’t go to bed now?”

“Aaron, you know -“ Robert began, sighing as Aaron walked out of the backroom without waiting for him to finish his sentence. He stood alone, in the kitchen, for a few minutes, trying to figure out what he could do to help.

His first instinct was to follow Aaron, and hold him close, and reassure him that everything was going to be alright, that he’d be okay - but Aaron didn’t want that, he’d told Robert he didn’t want that.

He’d just have to find a new way to help Aaron through it all, he supposed.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi, (*) anon here, thnkyou for your kind response. I've sent the last part of my looongg ask. The thing is, savan worked with 1d on the first 2 album. And to think on such a short time for a band with minimal experience, to push and push and push the people bts enough that they went with it, give more control musically, although clearly not gracefully. There is no doubt who's the loudest. And I love him for that. You cant help but admired their strength. I have faith for their bright future :)

My own reaction was surprise that management bothered to listen to Louis at all, that he won in the end. If he was the problematic one and “not the singer, not the star,” why didn’t they just kick him out? They got their star. They got their singer. They could’ve made some narrative– Louis couldn’t get along with the others, etc.

The problem, for management, of giving in to Louis, was that it set a precedent. It relinquished management’s absolute control.

So by giving up creative control, they had to establish dominance in some other way, by controlling image. Image control was as much a psychological tool as a financial one. You make them feel like they’re not in control of their own social life, you play with fan perception, you’re going to play with their self-esteem.

Cue “band psychologist,” Anne Marie Thompson– also head of PR. Talk about your conflicts of interests (except there was no conflict. She wasn’t ever there to protect the boys. Psychology works both ways).

Read more here: http://business-direction.tumblr.com/post/134214607193/scrufflecake-ann-marie-thompson-is-head-of-syco

The reason Louis won in the end, in my opinion, was that he wasn’t alone. All the boys felt the same way. They wouldn’t have worked well without him. That must have been clear to management.

Management, and Savan, were clearly taken aback by this development. Hence the war we’ve seen since 2012.

What was fascinating about the interview was the skeletons it exposed. Fans are constantly being mocked for their “conspiracy” thinking about band-management disagreements. And here, in black and white, is how it went down, spelled out pretty clearly.

In case there’s any doubt about the boys needing psychological counseling, look at this interview: https://youtu.be/xHjBFCoy1yU?list=RDR8YzZQ396sE. Try not to get distracted by Harry’s beauty. At 3:25, Liam says to Harry, you should lie down on this couch and get sorted. And Harry answers, softly, wryly, I’ve already done that.
Which star wars villain should you fight?

maybe you express love by yelling “fight me!” with tears streaming down your face. maybe you need to work out your repressed trauma, or maybe you just want some exercise. Whichever it is, here’s everything you need to know to decide which pillar of galactic evil to bloody your knuckles on!

Darth Vader

Do it. Fight Darth Vader. You’ll never win, and that’s the goal. from the cradle to the coffin, every one of us knows who he is and what he’s capable of, and yearns to erotically asphyxiated by the one true goth of all time. Fight him, and gasp your final breath to the thrilling thunder of the imperial march

end fight probability: 300% you die highly aroused and emotionally fulfilled

Palpatine

Not a good idea at all. If you must scratch the vengeance itch, dew it, but he’s slippery for such a crusty dude and dreadfully powerful. Watch out for those sharp, germy fingers.

end fight probability: 80% he fries you to a crisp, 20% you win but later die of infected wounds

Darth Maul

Don’t even fucking try. This bugger can survive literally anything. Give up.

end fight probability: 200% even if you shoot him into the fucking sun, he survives it

General Grievous

Why would you fight my old boy Grievous? he’s just trying to do his job and he’s so tired. Look at the bags under his eyes. And he has asthma. if you decide to be a heartless beast and fight him anyway, you will lose, because he has four arms and he’s 7 feet tall. Just buy him a drink and leave him alone.

end fight probability: 100% he cuts you into sashimi, but you deserve it for picking a fight with Johnny-four-lightsabers

Count Dooku

I can’t imagine feeling anything about him strongly enough to warrant a fight, but if that’s your thing, go ahead I guess. Put out his creepy eyes first.

end fight probability: 60% you win because he’s old, but sustain injuries

Kylo Ren

Please, fight him. Beat his ass. if you can dodge the saber and hold off laughing long enough to get a grip on his hair, he’ll trip over his own garments trying to shake you off and fall on his own blades. finish it up by crushing his windpipe so we never have to suffer his insufferable voice ever again. Good luck and godspeed.

end fight probability: 82% you rip his face off (100% I need counseling)

Snoke

Don’t fight this crusty boy until we know more about his stats. but if you decide to anyway, he has serious claws – you better protect your neck against a Gollum-style strangling. he’s survived this far, he can probably survive a lot more. if you can take him seriously long enough to attack.

end fight probability: 75% he bludgeons you with a frozen rat (his supper) while screaming “for the last goddamn time I am NOT darth plageius”

Tarkin

Definitely fight him, take out all your inner rage on the poster boy for creepy old white men who ruin everything. The main thing is to watch out for those cheekbones, which can probably split wood and definitely slice your hand off. Don’t be distracted by his foul stench either. The good news is that he’s old and frail and the only exercise he’s ever had is furiously jacking it to imperialist propaganda.

end fight probability: 90% you kill him, 64% the spores released by his disintegrating corpse give you a debilitating lung disease

Krennic

Fight him, but be careful about it, he’s famously prone to violent confrontation and not afraid to start swinging. Target his major weakness: the aesthetic. if you can stand on his cape you can probably immobilize him.

end fight probability: 80% you win with minor injuries

Hux

this guy is literally everything wrong with the world today –  fascism, gingers, men who won’t shut up. Fight him and kill him for all of us. It’ll be easy, he looks to be made of damp bread & library paste. Go for it. Wring his neck

end fight probability: 99% you break every bone in his pathetic body

Phasma

This is a tricky one. if you’re a wookiee, go ahead, you may able to win. If you’re human, you will be slammed to the ground before you knew what hit you, with a blaster barrel in your mouth. But if you’re a lesbian that was probably the goal all along.

end fight probability: 110% she breaks every bone in your pathetic body

Thrawn

Deep down, we all want to either fight him or fuck him, so do it. Fight him. Grab him by that gigantic forehead and smash him through a wall, which was part of his master plan all along, of course. He’ll bust out those thick blue biceps and either the brawl will continue or you’ll end up making passionate love on the floor.

end fight probability: whatever happened, it was artistically done

Aw.

My college sent out an email saying “the department of justice has withdrawn government guidance requiring that universities provide access to public bathrooms based on the gender identity of each individual.”

And then they said: 

“To avoid any confusion, at _______ University, every individual has and will continue to have access to the bathroom facilities matching their gender identity.” 

Like.

My university sent out an email when Trump was elected saying that if anyone felt overwhelmed or scared or emotionally upset, it would be holding therapy group meetings. 

And it sent out a message when Trump signed that Muslim ban saying that everyone is a part of our community and that anyone who needs legal counsel should come to one of our campus buildings for help. 

Like, my  university wants nothing to do with Trump’s bullshit and it’s great.

Basically: 

The government: Ya’ll don’t have to protect trans people. 

My university: