need in my life though

i have literally no sense of time beyond a couple days, either forwards or backwards

something happened a week ago? sure, but it feels the same to me as if it was three weeks ago, or three days. something else happened? ok, but i cant tell you if it came before the other thing, or after, or even on the same day

& if something is more than a week in the future, it just doesnt exist. i cant plan for it. i cant remember any plans people tell me about it. i cant prepare for anything beyond the horizon

its never had too much of an impact on me, but im scared of whatll happen if im a suspect for a crime

‘what were you doing 8pm last friday?’ something, im sure. maybe nothing. honestly i feel like ive only existed this second. ‘you told us this sequence of events before, but now youve changed the order. are you lying?’ i mean im not trying to deceive you but theres a 90% chance that anything i tell you is a false memory. isnt there someone else you can ask? if i try to give you the story again, itll be different again

2

early morning pages about the Sun🌻

10

Why did you give up on your dream? You could ride and continue to dream of designing motorcycles.

2

Mini self project - Placing Gwen and Morgana in period clothing.
1910′s - Outdoor day wear & evening wear
(note the background are edited photo’s because it’d take too long to individually draw them and I’m lazy af)

4

Just some random doodles.

I once had this best friend who meant everything to me and I would’ve took a bullet for her but one day she decided she wouldn’t do the same and shut me out of her life completely. I begged her for weeks to give me one last chance even though I did nothing wrong, she finally gave in but over that time I realized that she was the reason for my pain & suffering. She started all the arguments and blamed everything on me yet I always apologized but I finally did what I needed to do what was completely shutting her out of my life, even though we were best friends for almost 5 years she was the toxic in me that I needed to get rid of and ever since that day my depression went away and I have the two greatest best friends who fully support me and care for me unconditionally even though I have trust issues from my old best friend.
8

gif battle vs. @citrusomi@cosmicgxys ♡ @haengah
@hallarina ♡ @minchims ♡ @parksoijn​ ♡ @taesyeon​ ♡ @x1yeon

round 3: female idols + city vs. nature

You will always be the one who broke my heart but I no longer wish to feel as though you’ve broken me. I need my life to once again have meaning… for there to be some purpose to the pain… So instead I will say that you are the person who made me; that you may have ultimately broken my heart… but you also taught me how to feel.
4

Falling in love with Kim Seokjin (3/)

Okay, listen. I know I’m late. But fully, I don’t care. Wanna know why????? Cos man died. I actually died. I thought the camo was going to kill me but no it was this. This whole ‘falling in love with Kim Seokjin’ highkey had an order but fuck orders cos this actually happened. And listen, as a black girl I just wanna say man was lean, bopping tf out, like I will never ever ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever get over it. I can’t and I won’t and watch me talk about this to my future partner, saying that they’ll never make me feel how Kim Seokjin has ever made me feel.

anonymous asked:

if not gun control, then what do you think would help with the situation in the us right now? im genuinely wondering just cause it feels so hopeless lately

You mean about gun violence? I think a large part of the problem is not even information about safe gun handling or respect for firearms or even necessarily access to firearms, but a uniquely American culture centered on and accepting of violence as a normal thing. I think Americans are just uniquely violent, period.

So the answer is functionally cultural revolution, frankly. A culture where violence isn’t seen as a normal occurance or inevitability. A culture where domestic violence and other forms of male violence are actively challenged and socially, not just legally, punished, but wherein a man can’t just be a rapist and have a normal career. Things like that are crucial. These are the kinds of things I’d like to see mandated as cultural programs under socialism.

I also think it is very recent that we’ve had a “gun violence” issue in the way that we think of it now, and it relates to the American upstate constsntly being at war such that warfare has permeated the public mindset (popularity of camo, war video games that I myself love playing, American cultural focus on warfare in film, etc) that of course a violent culture and a violent state lead to violence being seen as a general, neutral fact of life. Because for all of my life it HAS been, though it doesn’t need to be. And I also think there is something uniquely post 9/11 about the use of violence specifically as a means to a political end thay has permeated American gun violence as it relates to mass shootings- shoot up a planned parenthood, murder an abortion provider or threaten to, murder a bunch of gay people to instill fear in them, murder a bunch of random women to show that they can and it is their fault for not fucking you, etc. That there is a particular profile for these things I’d never brought up- there’s a male violence problem, and specifically a white male violence problem, that leads to the kinds of events that make headlines. These events are very new- aside from the Oklahomo City bombing, it’s hard to think of a list of similarly political attacks before very recent years. And there have been millions of guns here for a long time. So SOMETHING changed and I think that is largely cultural.

But those kinds of shooting make up a tiny fraction of gun deaths per year, frankly. Most is interpersonal violence, gang violence or otherwise criminal violence, and suicides. All of that can be addressed at the cultural level but not until you acknowledge it.

To be clear, it’s not that I oppose all gun control measures but it’s obvious that people who want blanket “gun control” have few policies in mind that would work. Background checks are already implemented and can’t possibly catch everything. Safe gun storage would prevent several accidental deaths per year, and I agree any house with a child or someone who shouldn’t use firearms should hsve a secure safe, but that’s a tiny portion of gun deaths per year. What do you want to do about the close to 400 million guns already in the country? You can’t track them all down. Even if you could, confiscation would start a civil war. Ban “high” capacity magazine? There are already thousands, almost definitely tens of millions, in circulation. Automatic weapons are already banned. Banning semi autos is both absurd and useless when criminals are not going to have a hard time finding one of the many millions already in existence. So I get 10 rounds in a bolt action to defend myself against someone coming into my house with 30 rounds semi auto? What sense does that make? You see that many places IN THE US with strict gun laws have high gun crime rates. You think Chicago gang members have their firearms ID like I do? Or paid the hundreds of dollars it takes to get a carry license like I did? They’re just already too available for you to implement controls that would actually affect people who shouldn’t have guns and already have them.

You can control all you want moving forward but with more than a gun for every single person in the country, I think we might just sort of be past the point of no return and that nothing but lasting cultural change will make that big of a difference.

6

Reign Meme: [1/8] costumes 

Monsieur Le Dauphin François II de France in “Pilot”

@metvmorqhoses