nba retiring


There will never be another like you. The game won’t be the same without you. Thank you for all the great memories. Thank you for always giving it your all, night in and night out. Thank you for playing through injuries even when you didn’t have to. Thank you for always putting the fans first and never disappointing them. Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for the game of basketball. Thank you, Kobe Bryant.

one time me and my bro were walking through some woods and talking about how it looked like Bigfoot territory, somehow i got onto how bigfoots probably just some weird old dude who lives alone in the woods to which my brother said “he’d have to be fuckin tall tho….bigfoot confirmed for ex-nba player who retired to a forest” and then like LITERALLY 2 minutes later we found a basketball just lying there


Tim Duncan, this man is what every person who wants to be a NBA player should aspire to be. He did it right and did it perfectly. Humble, but mighty. Hard working and talented. Tim Duncan had it all and did it all. There will never be a class act like this in the league again. I will definitely miss this man and watching the nba finals knowing he won’t be there is sad. Happy Retirement Timmy!

None of these niggas was Jordan fans when he was playing but now nigga magically memorized all his stats just to hate on the nigga who they hate who is in the same exact position. Bron ain't the GOAT. But he damn sure gonna be everybody favorite NBA player after he retires and it's time to tear down some kid who we feel isn't living up to the most unrealistic expectations ever.
wtf is dave talking about // pt. II

a glossary of unusual words and names on Glass Animals’ new album How to be a Human Being [part I here]


baobab • a type of tree found in Madagascar, Africa, and Australia and often called “the tree of life” in African culture. The “super fruit” it produces has high levels of vitamin C, fiber, calcium, potassium, and antioxidants, and is typically sold in powder form.

goji berries • vitamin and antioxidant-rich bright red berries native to Asia.

jojoba • a desert shrub whose seeds produce jojoba oil, which is commonly used in various cosmetic and skin care products because of its similarity to the natural oil of the skin.

ketamine • an anesthetic drug used medically before surgeries for blocking pain. Also a popular party drug because of its quick high that can cause hallucinations, relaxation, and feelings of detachment.

kinder egg • a hollow chocolate egg with a small surprise toy inside. Popular in Europe as collectors’ items and technically illegal in the US.

mcfuck • a word invented by Dave to refer to any food item from McDonalds.

rails • also known as a “line,” a row of a powdered drug to be snorted.


bedsit • in the UK and Ireland, low-cost rental housing that consists of a single private room for the occupant and a bathroom shared with multiple other occupants.

hakeem olajuwon • a now-retired professional NBA basketball player for the Houston Rockets and the Toronto Raptors from 1984-2002. He is considered to be one of the greatest center players of all time.

nola • New Orleans, the largest city in the US state of Louisiana, located on the coast of the Gulf of Mexico.

versace • a high-end Italian designer brand that makes clothing and leather accessories.

pappy • mushy; lacking in substance or value.


black dope • presumably black tar heroin, a dark tar-like variety of heroin found mostly in the southwestern US and Latin America.

pensacola • a city located on the coast of the Gulf of Mexico in the US state of Florida’s panhandle. “a huge military town with like three large naval bases in a small radius, full of sailors and tattoo parlors, bars, drug addicts, hotels, and jay-walkers” (~thanks lukeskullwalker!)

studebaker • an American automobile manufacturer that produced cars from 1897 to 1966.

vogue • a cigarette brand marketed as elegant and fashionable, sold primarily to women.


plasters • British English for an adhesive bandage or bandaid.


percocet • an opioid medication for reducing pain, often abused for the temporary euphoric high it sometimes also provides.

message me with any corrections or things you think should be added!