the entirety of criminal minds season 4
  • *five to six minute intro showing something super sketchy but weirdly enthralling* *still makes you side eye ur screen a lil bit*
  • *episode plays*
  • hotch:*#blessed moments seeing him smiling every once in a while electrocutes 3000 volts of pure life into everyone involved* “jj since ur having a baby i thought i'd wiggle near ur baby bump every once in a while and hope u know that i want to touch it”
  • morgan:*the actual biggest flirt anyone has probably ever seen* *everyone still loves him because his eyebrows are shaped perfectly 2 portray how much of a cute puppy he is* “what r u saying man, this has to end you know like this is ur last chance man, ya know man? man bro man man man bro do u get what i'm sayin' man?”
  • reid:*touches a baby once* *is legitimately #blessed for life in every religion possible and it somehow fixes the bags under his eyes for a few episodes* “since i don't like what i'm hearing rn i'm going to grumpily put my mouth in a straight line and waddle away like i just spent the night with morgan”
  • jj:*even with her face swollen after pushing the equivalent to a large melon out of her coochie she still looks fresh as hell* *no one knows how she does it* “i am so under appreciated but idc bc i have a baby and hotch looks like he isn't constipated 25/8”
  • garcia:*her entire being is just a human mold filled to the brim with sparkles and coffee and other bright things* “please tell hotch i don't need to be drug tested”
  • prentiss:*i'm still 90% sure she isn't real* *looks at reid in slight confusion* “okay but what are u exactly”
  • rossi:*his hair is getting grey-er by the episode* “not only did i fuck over everything u thought was reality but i'm also going to fuck ur mom”

finally dumped my piece of shit boyfriend AGAIN and this time im not falling for his shittiness!!! im going to take a damn shower and put on makeup and get a job and drink water and be successful….i dont need you, i never did

he’s been watching, no – GLARING, at them all night, his already dark eyes turning to embers of coal. two weeks. it’d been two fucking weeks since their break up and they ALREADY had the nerve to come into his bar, sit on someone’s lap and practically suck their face off right in front of him? kaden was out of his mind with RAGE, his hands itching to punch someone. it was apparent to him this was all just a show – a grand spectacle to piss him off and, just as the other most likely intended, anger boiled in his veins. his hands gripped the glasses he worked with so tightly he managed to smash one to pieces with his livid clasp. “fuck,” kaden mumbled under his breath, grabbing the rag tossed over his shoulder and wrapping it over the newly formed cut. throwing another glance over to the couple he’d been eyeing all night, he noticed their date was gone for the moment. quickly, he made a tray of shots, walking out from his safe haven and on to the dance floor, making a beeline for them. it didn’t take him long to find their table. tossing down the tray and hunching over the wooden slab to glower at them, his fingers digging angrily into the lumber, “what the FUCK do you think you’re doing?” he growled through grit teeth.