natural phenomenons

The Signs as Natural Phenomena
  • Aries//Volcano: Destructive, Explosive, Unpredictable
  • Taurus//Mountains: Headstrong, Dependable, Fixed
  • Gemini//Northern Lights: Rare, Mythical, Phenomenal
  • Cancer//Tsunami: Overwhelming sense of emotions, strong, self-destructive
  • Leo//Lighting: Striking, Bright, Not scared of anything
  • Virgo//Fog: Vague, Conditional, Difficult to understand
  • Libra//Wildfire: contagious, difficult to stop, fast moving
  • Scorpio//Thunderstorm: Dark, Powerful, Destructive
  • Sagittarius//Rainbows: Happiness, Energy, Colorful
  • Capricorn//Blizzard: Cold, Unrelenting, Powerful
  • Aquarius//Earthquakes: Strong, releases energy, destabilizing
  • Pisces//Waterfalls: Soothing, Calm, Peaceful
the signs’ anger as natural phenomenons

ARIES: lightening (a sudden destructive release; often well aimed and with few survivors)

TAURUS: volcanic eruption (with a build-up so slow the outburst is rarely expected, though they give lots of warnings; the destruction is vast and they can remain upset or hold a grudge for a long time after)

GEMINI: tornado (very messy and loud, they will verbally throw everything at you in the hopes that something hits where it hurts the most; could be harmless except when it’s not)

CANCER: tsunami (it’s usually very personal, they want you to feel exactly what you made them feel; they want you to drown in that feeling)

LEO: wildfire (one of the worst tempers, they take a lot and it’s usually one seemingly small thing that sparks it, from then on its loud and obliterates everyone in its path and doesn’t end until they’re good and satisfied or plain exhausted; no apologies)

VIRGO: earthquake (they’ve most likely been holding this in for ages just under the surface, hot and densely suppressed; it seems to happen without warning, the façade of control cracks, they release some of their most shattering critiques and observations; no one is exactly the same after)

LIBRA: hail storm (anger is usually communicated clearly, if not coldly and with a bit of passive-aggressive derision; they probably discussed it with themselves whether this anger is deserving or not, if it’s been deemed justified your verdict is final and penance is delivered without respite)

SCORPIO: maelstorm (this is definitely a palpable experience for everyone involved; they will hold back at first, more from fear of themselves than of you; the break can happen as suddenly as an aries, it is consuming and frightening for both of you, the depth of their contempt, even if exposed just a little, causing either of you back off least you fall in and never return; they usually regret not being the bigger person after)

SAGITTARIUS: solar flare (like scorpio, they are aware of the power of their temper which is why they seem to distance themselves or ‘run away’ when upset; if they can’t laugh it off, the flare is sudden and strong for them, throwing everything, like gemini but with grotesquely precise aim; then it’s over like nothing even happened)

CAPRICORN: avalanche/mudslide (their anger is like a higher power, even while they are feeling it they are still trying to distance themselves from it so that it becomes its own force with its own will, course and end; and the end is usually them never acknowledging your existence again. ever.)

AQUARIUS: thunder storm (slow to anger, when it happens all their positive traits are flipped, friendliness becomes cold, imagination becomes cunning, cool cleverness turns to a harsh downpour of criticism and ugly truths; they will make you doubt whether their brighter side ever really existed)

PISCES: geyser (for one fleeting moment they are so completely besides themselves it’s frightening for everyone involved; their deep, emotionally intelligent nature is flushed away in a destructive and scary display they didn’t even know they were capable of, rushing out of a deep chasm of turmoil they probably didn’t know was there)

2

Don’t let Donald Trump’s antics distract you from what’s really important (Vox):

Here are a few news stories that broke between the time I left work a little early on Friday afternoon and the time my toddler went down for his midday nap on Saturday:

The Hamilton blow-up — because it’s easy to understand, bizarre, and connects with a pop culture phenomenon — has naturally ended up getting the bulk of the news pickup. One potential reason is that Trump’s tweets are public, whereas it took diligent reporting by the Washington Post to get the hotel story. The idea is that other prestigious outlets may be disinclined to pay attention to a story the Post “owns” and to give due credit to its significance.

Meanwhile, a second-order controversy even broke out among the people I follow on Twitter as to whether the Hamilton audience booing Mike Pence in some sense played into Trump’s hands.

them: can you rap?

me: you tell me

me: KID HONESTLY I COULD GO ON AND ON I CAN EXPLAIN EVERY NATURAL PHENOMENON THE TIDE THE GRASS THE GROUND AH THAT WAS MAUI JUST MESSIN AROUND I KILLED AN EEL I BURIED ITS GUTS SMOTHERED A TREE NOW YA GOT COCONUTS WHATS THE LESSON WHAT IS THE TAKE AWAY DONT MESS WITH MAUI WHEN HES ON A BREAKAWAY AND THE TAPESTRY HERE IN MY SKIN IS A MAP OF THE VICTORIES I WIN LOOK WHERE I’VE BEEN I MAKE EVERYTHING HAPPEN LOOK AT THAT MINIYAMAUIATICKITYHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HEY

them: holy shit

A phenomenon called “crown shyness” can be found in Camphor trees, where the crowns of the Camphor trees do not touch each other and form channels in the canopy.  The camphor tree is used to produce Vic’s Vapor Rub and Tigerbalm.  Scientists still have not found a reason for the phenomena. Their most likely hypothesis is that the trees release a type of gas that warns other trees to stay away.  

  • Someone: (thanks me for something)
  • Me: Kid, honestly I could go on and on / I can explain every natural phenomenon / The tide, the grass, the ground / Oh that was Maui just messin' around / I killed an eel, I buried its guts / Sprouted a tree, now you've got coconuts / What's the lesson? What is the take-away? / DON'T MESS WITH MAUI WHEN HE'S ON A BREAKAWAY / And the tapestry here on my skin / Is a map of the victories I win / Look where I've been! I make everything happen / Look at that mean mini Maui just tickety tappin' / ha hA HA HA HA HA HEY