Touch exhilarates and comforts; it has never been a matter of indifference to her, not since she discovered its possibilities. This was at school – after the days of Nanny, always matter-of-fact, and the formal, cold kisses exchanged between parent and child. Touch as rivalry and challenge and triumph, on the playing field. Touch as overture, passing notes under desks, fingers lingering; touch as friendship. Touch as transgression, in midnight feasts, in crawling under each other’s covers for confidences and comfort… and, later, in bolder transgressions, for ecstatic discovery. Here, too, challenge and triumph; here, too, confidences and comfort; here joy, unmediated, pure and mindless.
She touches those she loves not only because she can, because for her touch is still friendship and confidence and comfort, but because she has seen how easily these possibilities, these simple human beauties, can be destroyed. She never touches Freddie’s jawline without thinking of the first time she saw one shattered by a bullet. Such a perfect, fragile line. Sometimes, helping Bel with a zipper or a headline or a cigarette, she thinks that all that holds them together is each other’s hands. It is an irony, of course, that one of the few men with whom she has shared a bed – and one of the people who shared hers the longest – is so suspicious of the potential disorders of crumpled papers, rumpled sleeves, ruffled hair, marked skin. But maybe it is also inevitable: that contact should matter so much to them both, so differently.
The fact that Maxwell Sheffield is the first character I ever fell in love with when I was like 12 explains every single thing about my sexuality and also completely ruined me and my expectations of men.
You know, the worst thing about being a nanny is the fact that I have to watch children’s movies. And it’s not that I don’t like them, but damn. Some of them are so sad. Like that movie Inside Out? Don’t get me started on Bing Bong. My heart is still broken, and apparently I’m more sensitive than a four year old. So that’s great. I’m definitely getting a huge thing of Ben & Jerry’s later.
"The Next Doctor" Really Did Tell Us Everything About The Next Doctor(s)
There is this one episode that I keep coming back to time and time again, because the hints and references are so precise, it is ridiculous. And it’s not even a Moffat episode. I am talking, of course, about The Next Doctor.
I can hear my long-term followers in the distance sigh “not again”. But bear with me here, I have news! This theory is all about how we could have seen Missy coming and what the heck she has to do with the Doctor’s family.
Was Regina abusive because she smothered Henry and also wouldn't let him see Emma?
Regina’s abusive because she’s abusive. Yes, there’s smothering but there’s more isolation. From the Humane Society, on emotional abuse:
Ignoring. Either physically or psychologically, the parent or caregiver is not present to respond to the child. He or she may not look at the child and may not call the child by name.
Rejecting. This is an active refusal to respond to a child’s needs (e.g., refusing to touch a child, denying the needs of a child, ridiculing a child).
Isolating. The parent or caregiver consistently prevents the child from having normal social interactions with peers, family members and adults. This also may include confining the child or limiting the child’s freedom of movement.
Exploiting or corrupting. In this kind of abuse, a child is taught, encouraged or forced to develop inappropriate or illegal behaviors. It may involve self-destructive or antisocial acts of the parent or caregiver, such as teaching a child how to steal or forcing a child into prostitution.
Verbally assaulting. This involves constantly belittling, shaming, ridiculing or verbally threatening the child.
Terrorizing. Here, the parent or caregiver threatens or bullies the child and creates a climate of fear for the child. Terrorizing can include placing the child or the child’s loved one (such as a sibling, pet or toy) in a dangerous or chaotic situation, or placing rigid or unrealistic expectations on the child with threats of harm if they are not met.
Neglecting the child. This abuse may include educational neglect, where a parent or caregiver fails or refuses to provide the child with necessary educational services; mental health neglect, where the parent or caregiver denies or ignores a child’s need for treatment for psychological problems; or medical neglect, where a parent or caregiver denies or ignores a child’s need for treatment for medical problems.
Isolating: We know that Regina spends a lot of time not with Henry. Look at Henry season 1. How many times is he eating meals alone? In the first season we see him eat alone, with Emma, with Emma and MM. The only time, I believe, we see him eat with Regina is in a dream. I guess the kid must have a tab at Granny’s, because we see him there alone quite a bit. So far as we can tell he’s alone before school and until dinner time. He’s alone at least some Saturdays for more than 8 hours. We know Regina drops him off in the evening and goes right back out again despite knowing he’s been hanging out in the hospital. There’s no sign of baby sitters or nannies despite the fact that Regina could make anyone in town watch out for him
Now some people argue that this is being a single parent. But first of all Regina doesn’t have to work. Time is frozen. Just what is she doing? And she certainly doesn’t have to work on Saturdays when she lies about council meetings. It’s hard to see when Regina spends any time with her son.
Now we might argue that this is a tv show and for plot reasons we can’t always be having Regina and Henry together, etc. But every other child on the show they’ve made a point of showing that they’re taken care of. The woodsman keeps his children with him. Jefferson makes sure the neighbors can take care of Grace when he can’t be with her. And Emma makes sure someone’s keeping an eye on Henry even when he’s 12 and she’s gone for a couple of hours. The fact that Henry is so often unsupervised and ignored is because of Regina’s choices.
Rejecting: If you watch season one you’ll see that there’s very little physical contact between Regina and Henry. There’s usually space between them. There’s no casual touch. If there’s touching it’s often about control; Regina leading him away from someone, holding him still so he has to watch something. She rejects what he tells her, too. His ideas about the curse are delusions that need to be crushed, she questions why he would want to hurt her, etc. And tries to get Archie to permanently reject the ‘delusions’ that Henry has about his book.
Isolating: This is a major one. Henry is completely isolated until Emma comes to town. Everyone is caught in the curse. He has no friends because no one ages. Regina says “He doesn’t really have any (friends.) He’s kind of a loner.” but the kid doesn’t have an option. He can’t have friends because the kids we went to first grade with are still six to his ten. "Paige" is ten now and she was ten when his mom was born. The only people he has a relationship with before Emma are Regina, who we know leaves him alone a lot of the time, and Archie. And Archie’s under Regina’s control.
No one in Storybrooke remembers things clearly. Henry’s ten when we meet him and other than Regina he hasn’t been able to learn social skills from interacting with people and building relationships. And Regina doesn’t want her curse to break. So what happens when Henry’s 18 and graduating from high school. What happens when he wants to date? What happens when he’s 28 and the same age as his grandparents?
Regina wants Henry’s love to herself, so it’s not just the passive isolation of raising him in a town where he can’t connect to anyone. It the way she deliberately tries to push away anyone he cares about or who cares about him. There’s Emma of course. She tries to kill her, put her in a coma, separate her and Henry by demand. She tries to kill MM and to separate her from Henry by telling him she wants to switch classes. The first time he makes friends she tries to send them out of town, knowing that anyone who tries to leave gets hurt. She kills Graham. She threatens to throw fireballs at people he cares about. She tries to kill his grandfather. She tells Henry that she’s going to kill everyone in town. She wants his love only for her, and that’s isolating.
Exploiting or corrupting: Reginaexploits Henrywhen she uses Henry as a bribe to get Emma out of the way. There’s also a lot of people who were upset when Henry lied to Regina about lunch, using that to sneak in to the vault. But that’s behavior he learned from Regina.He also does dangerous things like going to the mines or escaping his room on a rope ladder because of Regina’s actions.
Verbally assaulting: The most obvious example of this is a deleted scene, but Regina’s very manipulative in the way she talks to Henry. Not usually assault, but concerning.
Terrorizing: I would say that his worry for what his mother would do to hurt people counts as this, especially when he had to go to bed knowing that down the hall was the woman that killed Graham.
Neglecting the child: Honestly I don’t now why Henry is as smart as he is, considering he grew up in a school where they repeated the lessons all the time. For 28 years.
In addition: There’s the fact that Regina actively tried to make Henry think he was crazy. She tried to get Henry to see him as crazy and give him “a dose of reality” despite the fact that everything he said was true. She made sure that he heard Emma calling him crazy. Lied to him about things related to the curse.
And then there’s the fact that she killed him. No, she didn’t mean to do it, but what she meant to do was to put Emma, a person he loved, in a coma. To strengthen the curse and turn everyone else he loved except her into their former unaware caught in time personas, so that he was once again trapped in a place without anyone to care about him. Where he was depressed and without hope. And because she was so focused on getting rid of Emma she brought poison into her home, and sent it with Emma to a place she knows Henry visited. She did not chose for him to die, but she made it happen.
They make it pretty obvious that it’s abuse especially when in the same episode they have Cora (abusive mother) restraining her daughter with a tree, and then Regina doing the same to her son. And threatening to kill people with fireballs if he didn’t come home. Hours after he caught her trying to kill his grandfather.