names not to google

what keith did for one year alone in his shack

  • used to crunch on dry spaghetti for every meal
  • washed his clothes in sprite
  • ‘if there are any ghosts here tonight, can you make me sneeze?’ forces himself to sneeze 'hOLY-’
  • when there was a desert storm he would run straight at the lightning, screaming the whole time
  • labelled his water tank 'sweat’ and his gasoline tank 'water’
  • had never sworn out loud before because of authority figures. the first time he finally did, it was in a whisper and he giggled so hard he blacked out
  • had a pet rock named 'not-shiro’
  • he would talk to it and ask it questions
  • 'not-shiro, can i gargle with soap if i run out of toothpaste? you’re right, that’s stupid. i’ll use laundry detergent instead’
  • the only song he had on his iPod was the barney theme song and he would breakdance gently to it
  • found a cave full of strange lion carvings and his first instinct was to lick the walls
  • 'don’t mess with me i have a knife!!!!’
  • the desert lizard he’s threatening just blinks back at him
  • missed seeing cute boys. saw himself in a mirror and got so startled he punched it
  • found himself subconsciously spelling 'lance’ in his alphabet soup and got so mad he dunked the whole bowl on his head
  • he would write in the sand 'aliens hit me up i am single and willing’
  • took pictures of strange desert cryptids for his conspiracy board but they were just selfies
  • used his radio to listen for any news of shiro and make chewbacca noises on public channels
  • 'i don’t like sand. it’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere’
  • when he sat on his hoverbike he would pretend he was in an old spice commercial
  • every time a shooting star passed overhead he would gasp and whisper 'shiro’
  • snuck back to the garrison so he could carve 'kieth’ into all of iverson’s belongings to torment him. only realised he spelt his own name wrong after the 546th carving
  • 'snapshot this google earth!’ before he would raise his middle finger up at the sky

making OC ref sheets is ha r d

i dunno whats up with this narrative bronies are trying to push where they keep insisting that they were “never actually that bad” 

yes you were. yes you fucking were. five years ago i couldn’t go a single day without seeing mlp content shoved in my face. no matter where i went or who i unfollowed, it made its way to my computer screen every single day. i would consider it a lucky day if the content was SFW. it often was not. 

cropped porn avatars. MLP dolls modded to have fleshlights in them. little girls attending “brony cons” only to be met with grown men discussing the asses of MLP characters. screencaps of the show highlighting the horses asses with the captions “THEY KNOW WE’RE CLOPPING AND THEY LIKE IT” 

i remember it all. we all remember. you can insist that you were never “that bad” but we all remember. 

there will never be “the new bronies.” people can get stabbed over mcdonalds sauce. steven universe fans can send death threats over fanart being too skinny. voltron fans can harass each other for bad headcanons. at least i can avoid seeing it if i want to. i could never avoid bronies, they were far too pervasive. far too enthusiastic. they were ever-present, inescapable, and they were always horny. horny for child cartoon horses.

there was a time when you couldn’t google a mlp character’s name without getting porn, even with the strictest safesearch on. it’s different now, thank god, but there was that time. that time a bunch of horny grown men stole something away from children and turned it in to something that children simply could not have. 

i’m not going to forget that. i wish i could, but i can’t. and i won’t. i will never forgive bronies for making me know what “clopping” is. don’t @ me, motherfucker. 

anonymous asked:

Is there any chance you would be interested in writing or drawing parental/older brother Tim Drake? Bonus points if it involves being undercover/on the run.

VS

don’t know if that’s what you wanted anon but that’s what you get, sorry, i don’t even earn bonus points :’)

Okay real talk… If the Power Rangers writers were trying to make Kimberly seem straight (trying being the operative word)… Why did she have a girl’s nudes in the first place??? 

Not to mention her having the Bisexual Bob and having a date with Trini in Krispy Kreme

8

You said if Eleanor tries to confess that she doesn’t belong here, find a reason to avoid her like saying, “I’m going to the gym.” So that’s what I’ve been saying. That was a suggestion of the type of thing you could say! Don’t— How many times have you specifically told her you were going to the gym? Five. No, nine.

10

Oh, look!!! It’s an old meme that I made a long time ago and then forgot about it!!! I found it today while I was backing up some old files on my computer and decided it was time to post it. ~~~~Enjoy~~~~

( @thedemigodwhowaited you’re the only person I know who’s in this fandom w me pls support me)