n:xena

A typical Xena episode, from what I've seen so far (season 1)
  • Something vaguely dire:*happens*
  • Xena and Gabrielle:*are adorable*
  • Something vaguely dire:*magically finds Xena and Gabrielle*
  • Xena:YOU INTERRUPTED OUR MOMENT I KILL U
  • Gabrielle:Thas's my gf you kick its ass Xena
  • Xena:Oh wait that was an ancient evil threatening someone I once knew lolololol
  • **main credits**
  • Xena:No gabrielle stay and take care of the horse
  • Gabrielle:wtf Xena I'M IN THIS SHOW TOO
  • Gabrielle scenario 1:meh I guess Argo does need brushing better let Xena almost die 1000 times in peace
  • Gabrielle scenario 2:NO XENA *clings to legs*
  • Xena:finneeeee
  • random person from Xena's past:Ohhh Xena I love/hate you pls help
  • Xena:wtf you think I came for, the snacks?
  • random people:*attack Xena*
  • Xena:AIIYYYIYIYYYYYIYY
  • Gabrielle:If I'm not deaf by twenty at this rate it'll be a miracle from the gods.
  • Big Bad:*attacks*
  • Xena:lol no *defies all laws of physics to kill Big Bad*
  • Gabrielle:literally what even is this chakram
  • Xena:Don't question it Gabbie I'm Xena the f*cking warrior princess
  • random person from Xena's past:*try to make out with Xena*
  • Gabrielle:WTF NO *mentally killing them*
  • Gabrielle:*waxes eloquent about What We Learned This Week*
  • Xena:Yessss Gabbie you're so wise *mentally making out with her*
  • Xena & Gabrielle:*are adorable and walk off into the sunset/forest*
Femslash Gothic
- You hear rumors of a canon queer female in that new show. You end up watching five seasons just to find the character in a single episode, never to be seen again.

- There’s a blonde and a brunette, you ship them.  You can’t remember a time when you didn’t ship them.

- The internet screams about a particular pairing, you’ve never heard of this pairing before.  The next day it’s all you know.

- “Have you watched Xena?” they all say, over and over. You have, of course you have.  Haven’t you?

- Two women on screen speak to each other, their chemistry is obvious.  Or are you just hungry? So very hungry.

- “Vote in this poll to show them what we want!”  Who are ‘them’?  Why aren’t we asking what they want?

- You sit down to watch a new show, swearing you’re just going to relax and enjoy it.  Two episodes in and you find yourself screaming for them to kiss.  You scream endlessly with no result.

- “Have you heard of-?” Yes.  You’ve heard of everything. All of them whisper to you, crying out for validation.