The night before Bellamy leaves for a
twelve month tour overseas, he breaks up with Clarke. He can’t let her live
with that kind of constant worrying. He’s already put too much stress on
Octavia; he doesn’t want anyone else to live through that. Especially not
Clarke. He’d never forgive himself if something happened to him and she had to
deal with that.
When Clarke wakes up and Bellamy’s gone, the worry she felt
before doesn’t dissipate. She still worries, even more than she would if he was
actually writing to her. But he’s not. He hasn’t written a single word to her,
he hasn’t called, she knows nothing.
Well, not nothing. She knows what little Octavia has slipped into conversation.
It’s not enough to stop worrying or missing him, but it’s enough for her to
continue living her life in his absence. An absence she was much more prepared
for before he decided to sever all ties.
Her life isn’t the same, though, not without Bellamy, not
with only the tiniest details of his life and how he’s doing. She studies, she
works at her internships, she sketches his face and his hands, and she tries to
move on. Octavia sets her up on a few dates with friends of Lincoln, but they
never get to a second date. Monty sets her up on a date with his friend Wick,
but it’s clear he’s in love with Raven, so she works her matchmaking magic and
sets them up instead.
Octavia has Lincoln. Raven has Wick. Jasper has Maya. Monty
has Miller. And Clarke has the memory of Bellamy, the memory of his hands in
her hair and his lips on her neck, the memory of his quiet laugh in her ear after
the first time she told him she loved him, the memory of the passion in his
eyes when he said it back minutes later.