Remember This ~ Grayson

- I think this is my favorite story I’ve written so far since my writing is better than the last two. I’m practicing and trying my best so bare with me lol.

- P.S. This is kind of depressing

Grayson’s P.O.V

I remember the first time I saw you. You were sitting with your girlfriends, laughing up a storm in a quaint little coffee shop. One of your friends at the time, Kayla, who I got to know pretty well over the time I’ve spent with you, cracked a joke and you spit out your coffee everywhere. Everyone else looked at you like you were crazy, but not me. It was love at first sight from there.

That boisterous laugh is just one of the many things I adore about you. I also adore your warm smile that could lighten up any room you walked into. And the way your black hair hit right above your shoulders. I remember the day you got that haircut. You asked me with that little smirk on your face, “noticed anything different about me?” Of course I did. I noticed every thing about you. And don’t even get me started on those brown eyes of yours. Like caramel swirls that I just can’t help but get lost in.

You weren’t the hottest girl around, however, you were different and I liked different. Especially in LA where everyone was the same. Everyone was made up and fake, but you were real. As real as it could possibly get. And you were so stubborn. Once your mind was made up, then that was it. You definitely had a thick skull. But I loved you all the same.

I remember the first time I had the balls to come up to you. This time, you were by yourself at the bookstore around the corner. Hardly anyone ever came here. The only reason I did was because I saw you in the window as I walked by. That was a week after I first seen you. A week full of thoughts about you. About how much I wanted to kiss those big, but not too big, pink lips and tell you that my world was now much more colorful with you in it.

You were sat in a red bean-bag chair on the floor reading Sense and Sensibility, a classic. I was nervous as hell, with my palms sweating and my heartbeat racing, but I went up to you eventually and you never looked more beautiful with your blushed cheeks and a shocked look on your face. I couldn’t help but grin. Most likely from being scared of you rejecting me.

We talked all day in that bookstore, hours passed and before we knew it, it was time to head home. I told you things most people didn’t know about me because I just felt that comfortable around you. You told me things that just made me like you more. I got your number and texted you later that night saying how much fun I had learning about you. You said the same and I went to bed smiling like a fool.

Three dates in and I was hooked on you. I know it sounds dramatic, but I waited my whole life for someone like you to come around. I know I was only seventeen at the time, but who cares. And yes, you were two years older than me, but two years didn’t hurt anything. Then came my eighteenth birthday. Your gift to me was your virginity which I was stunned that you were still a virgin, but that made it all the more special. So I made love to you and even though I’ve had sex before, those times didn’t even compare to this time. Cause this time was with you. After we finished, we cuddled, tangled in each other’s arms and that’s when I knew what paradise was. It was being your man.

Then, things took a turn for the worst. We fought like cats and dogs almost everyday and even over the littlest of things. Like what movie we were gonna watch that night, which ended up with me sleeping on the couch because I said some harsh words. It was tough and it hurt like hell to see that you didn’t love me anymore. You didn’t say that directly, but you didn’t have to. I could tell.

From your one-worded answers to the roll of your eyes whenever I tried to make you laugh. It just wasn’t the same. So one day you said, out of the blue, that we should take a break. I was devastated. I never thought you’d ever say that since you always told me you’d never let go. And yet, here you are, letting go. You got up abruptly, had all your things packed before I even got home, and were out the door in no time. I cried for days, weeks, probably even months. I honestly had lost track of time. My twin brother Ethan, who you had so much fun with when we went on our little adventures, told me that he was sorry and that things would get better, but it damn sure didn’t feel like it. My heart was broken and I felt completely empty inside. I wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy.

Well, time went on and things did get better. I hadn’t heard from you in months and I found somebody new. And I loved her a lot. Her name was Ashley and we did everything together and she made me really happy. However, the night we went out to the movies, I saw you again and this time with another guy. I froze. You were smiling from ear to ear, looking at him like he put all the stars in the sky. Which was the same way I looked at you once upon a time.

That was it. After that I never saw you again. Ethan told me he heard that you moved back to Arizona, your home state. And me and Ashley were doing great. But you’d creep back into my mind every once in a while. I wonder how you’re doing, if you’re happy, or even if you’re still alive. But if you are, then please remember this, I love you. I always have and I always will.
Tom Wilson Imagine - Chapter 15



Tom’s POV:

One Week Later


Today was huge. I was picking up Y/N’s parents from the airport to surprise her. Her mom and dad had decided to fly into the city after the break in, just to see her and make sure that she was okay.

“Tom!” A woman shouted from the baggage claim area where I was waiting. “That’s you, right?” She laughed as she walked over to me. She had Y/N’s eyes, so I knew it was Brenda.

“Mrs. Y/L/N! It’s so nice to finally meet you.” I said as I grabbed her suitcase and pulled her in for a hug.

“Please, sweetheart, call me Brenda.” She answered as her perfume rubbed off on my shirt.

“Mr. Y/L/N, pleasure to meet you, sir.” I said, kind of nervous to meet her dad.

“You too, Tom. Thank you for taking such good care of our girl.” He said, shaking my hand and giving me a small hug.

“Absolutely.” I responded. “My car is out this way, I was thinking we could stop by Georgetown and pick up Y/N from her class, grab lunch and then I’ll get you guys to the hotel? But if you’re tired now I can take you to the hotel and we can meet you guys a little bit before the game?”

“You are so sweet to plan all of this.” Her mom said as she grabbed my arm as I lead them to my car.

“I try.” I laughed.

“I can see why Y/N is so into you.” Her dad, Mark, said.

“I don’t know about you Mark but I’m dying to see her. I want to go pick her up at school.” Her mom said.

“Whatever you’d like.” Mark chimed in from the backseat.

“Alright, off to Georgetown.” I said as I pulled away from the airport.

Driving through the city I made my way, to Georgetown, stopping in front of the same big brick building that I was becoming all to familiar with.

“There she is! I see her! Oh, she looks so beautiful.” Brenda exclaimed from the passenger seat of my car.

“Brenda just stay in the car and let her find us.” Mark laughed.

“Okay, okay,” She sighed. “Ooh! Here she comes!”

“Hi babe—- ah! Mom and dad! What are you guys doing here?” Y/N screamed as she opened the door, not being able to see through my tinted windows.

“Surprise!” Brenda said as she jumped out of the car and hugged her.

“How are you, sweetie?” Her dad asked as he pulled her in for a hug after her mom squeezed.

“I’m good. So much better now that y’all are here. Are you coming to the game tonight?” She asked as everyone climbed back in my car.

“Yes! Tom got the hook up for us.” Her mom laughed from the front seat, rubbing my arm. I smiled and carefully pulled away from the school, dodging college students walking in front of my car.

“I’m so excited. What made you guys decide to come into town?” She asked as she pulled her seatbelt on.

“We really just needed to come check on you after the break in. We just didn’t feel right about not coming into town after that happened. We’re so glad that Tom called us.” Her mom said as she turned around, placing a hand on Y/N’s leg.

“We just want to make sure our little girl is safe and okay.” Her dad chimed in.

I looked back from my mirror to see Y/N’s excited expression fall. Her eyes trailed out the window and her eyes welled up with tears.

“Babe don’t cry.” I said out of habit, forgetting that her parents were in the car. Whenever I see her get upset I just go into protective mode. Nothing hurts my heart more.

“I mean, Y/N – stop. What’s wrong?” I corrected as I cleared my throat.

“It was just so scary.” She began quietly.

“I’m sure it was sweetie. I’m sorry that we couldn’t be there for you. That’s how it is when you go to school far away.” Mark said as he rubbed her back.

“Mark, please.” Brenda yell-whispered to him.

“I’m just really glad that Tom was able to get there. I don’t know what I would’ve done without him,” She continued.

“We are happy he was there too. We’re glad that you have someone to look out for you while you’re here.” Her mom said with a smile as I pulled up in front of their hotel.

“Here you are, guys!” I said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood.

“Thanks for picking us up, Tom.” Mark said as he got out of the car.

“Of course.” I said as I met him at the trunk, helping them with their luggage.

“Thank you so much sweetie.” Brenda said as she gave me another hug.

“Alright, beautiful.” Brenda began, pulling Y/N in for another hug. “We’ll see you in a little bit.”

“Yeah, I’ll come by and pick you guys up at around 4:15.” I told them as they walked inside the hotel.

“And make sure you’re outside waiting at 4:15 because Tom has to be at the game at 5!” Y/N called after them. I laughed.

“Surprise baby.” I whispered to her as I pulled her into a hug before we got back in the car.

“Thank you for doing this.” She said as she kissed me.

“I rented out a suite for you guys tonight at the game too. It’ll be really special. I know they don’t get out here much.”

“I love you so much. Thank you for doing that.” She said with a smile as I helped her into the passenger seat.



The suite that Tom had set up for my parents and I was incredible. We got the arena at 5, and there was a four course meal waiting for us when we got there.  It was so nice to catch up with my parents and hear about life back in Texas. Two hours of chit chat passed quickly, and the horn sounded as the game began. We made our way to our seats as the puck started to move around the ice. The Caps were playing the Penguins tonight… always a wild game to be at.

“Is that Tom, fighting?” My mom asked as she pointed to the ice. Tom had dropped the gloves halfway into the first and left a Penguins goon with a broken nose and a bloody face.

“Yes mom, Tom is an enforcer.” I laughed.

“How could anyone so sweet just kick someone’s ass like that?” She questioned.

“It’s his job, Brenda!” My dad chimed in. “I like the fact that he can take someone out.”

The first period went on to be scoreless, and then things picked up in the second. Tom scored on the first shift of the second period, erupting cheers and applause throughout the already bumping Verizon Center. His goal boosted morale among the fans and the team, causing him to score once more not even a minute later. The three of us were on our feet screaming and yelling as the goal light went off.

“He’s amazing!” My mom yelled over the cheers as she clapped.

“I’ve never seen him score two goals in one game before. Maybe you’re his good luck charm.” I nudged her with a wink.

“He’s a very good guy, Y/N. Please keep him around. I know he takes good care of you.” She answered with a soft smile.

“He does. I love him very much.” I answered. She grabbed my hand and squeezed it, silently telling me how lucky I was to have someone who loved me and wanted to protect me.

The screen inside our suite showed Tom sitting on the bench, his smile still big after scoring his second goal. I knew he was so proud of himself and that he was so excited. I was too. I needed to do something for him. To say that I owed him was a complete understatement. Not only was he there for me in my time of need after we had a bad fight, he let me move in with him, he took complete care of me, and even reached out to my parents to surprise me. Yeah… he needed a surprise of his own.

Hey Carly, remember that black lingerie set you bought awhile back but you never got to wear because you and your boyfriend broke up?


I texted to Carly… realizing how insensitive it sounded after I already pressed send.

Wow, thanks for the reminder. But yes, why?


Could I borrow it? Tom surprised me. My parents came into town and he was in on it. Picked them up from the airport, hooked them up with a suite for the game… the whole enchilada. And he scored twice tonight. I want to “surprise” him if you know what I mean….


Okay, yes I get it. I don’t need details. Could you swing by and get it? My car is in the shop and Ava isn’t here. Plus I want to say hi to your parents.


Yeah. We’ll take an Uber that way after the game. Thank you so much! And put it in a gift bag or something so my parents don’t ask questions… lol


You got it. See you soon you soon!


The third period went on without much action, leaving the Capitals ahead 2-1, thanks to my baby.

A few minutes after the final horn blew, I got a text from Tom.

Hey babe, getting pulled for interviews so I’m going to be a late. I called you guys a car that’s waiting outside. It will take your parents back to the hotel and you back home. I’ll see you when I get back : )


Amazing game, babe. So proud of you. Thanks for the car. See you soon.


I told my parents about the car situation and they followed me outside, where we met a gentlemen in a big black SUV.

“Could you please make a stop at a house in Georgetown? I just need to pick something up.” I asked the driver as we got inside.

“Of course, Ms. Y/L/N. You must be so proud of Tom tonight. What a talented young man!” The driver said as he pulled off into the post game traffic.

“We most definitely are! He is just such an exhilarating player to watch in person!” My mom answered, still on an excitement high from the game.

Their conversation about his skills on the ice continued as I notified Carly of when we would be arriving.

“Sweetie, where is that we are stopping in Georgetown?” My mom asked after she was down fawning over my boyfriend with the driver.

“I just want to stop by the townhouse, Carly has to give me something. She also wants to see you guys.” I explained.

“Such a nice girl. Do you miss with her?” She asked as we crossed the bridge.

“Yes, but – “ I tried, only to be interrupted.

“But she is safer staying with Tom.” My dad chimed in firmly.

“Yes.” I answered with a deep breath, trying not to let my mind go back to the night of the break in.

“Here we are.” The driver said as he pulled in front of the townhouse. Carly was waiting for us on the stairs outside.

“Thank you so much!” I said as I rolled down the window and she handed me a blue gift bag with the lingerie inside. She made small talk with my parents for a few minutes, but I rushed their conversation as I was eager to get home.

“Alright, it was really nice seeing you guys. Enjoy your visit!” She called as she stepped away from the car.

“Thanks Carly!” My parents called to her in unison.

“What’s in the bag?” My mom whispered to me as the driver pulled away, making his way to the hotel.

“Nothing, mom.” I said as I quickly pulled the bag away from her.

She gave me that look like, “I know exactly what you’re doing.”


“Alright, I’ll see you guys tomorrow? I’ll text you in the morning and we can make plans.” I told my parents as we stopped in front of their hotel.

“Sounds good.” My dad said as he kissed me on the cheek and got out of the car.

“He deserves it.” My mom said, motioning to the bag. “Have a fun night. Be SAFE.” She winked.

“Ugh! Mom!” I screamed, shoving her a little.

“What! I’m just saying. Love you, honey.”

“Love you too.” I said reluctantly.


I thanked the driver and ran upstairs in the apartment complex. I turned on CSN to gauge how much time I had before Tom would be home. He was wrapping up an interview, so he would still need to shower and drive home. I jumped in the shower just to shave my legs. Not allowing my face or hair to get wet, I carefully moved the razor from my ankle to my hip. I stepped out of the shower and moisturized, making sure every part of my body is smooth and ready for his touch.

I stripped out of my plain bra and underwear and stepped into the back lingerie. It wasn’t your traditional bra and underwear set…. It was a one piece lace outfit with a neck line plunging to my belly button. The thin lace barely covered my nipples and showed most of the skin on my breasts. I freshened up my makeup and sprayed on some perfume on my neck.

I returned to the bedroom to find that the after game talk show had taken over CSN. By now, Tom was probably on his way home. Deciding that something was missing from my ensemble, I put on one of Tom’s dress shirts. I picked a white one and rolled the sleeves up just a little. Messing up my hair In the mirror and taking one last look, I heard the front door unlock.

“Babe?” Tom called as he walked through the door.

I slowly got off the bed and walked to the doorframe of the bedroom. “Hi, baby.” I cooed, playing with the buttons on his shirt that I was now wearing.

“So I was thinking about grabbing a drink with the guys to celebrate the win-“ He began, setting his bags down at his feet. He hadn’t looked at me yet. “Oh.” He said as he looked up at me, starting to shoot me that sexual smile that always made me wet. “No I’m not.” He laughed, still staring at me.

“Or, you could just stay in and celebrate with me.” I said as I let one of the sleeves fall off my shoulder.

“Yeah I think that’s a better idea.” He said as he walked over to me. He pressed me up against the bedroom door running his hands down my sides and kissed me intensely. I lifted my right leg and hooked it around his hip, allowing my wet and warm center to press against the side of his leg.

“I like this.” Tom said as he pulled back and ran his fingers against the lace that barely covered my breasts.

“I’m so proud of you, baby. I thought you deserved a surprise.” I murmured as I let the dress shirt slide off my shoulders and onto the floor.

“I like this surprise.” He whispered into my neck as he left gentle kisses on my soft spots. He slid is hands from my waist down as he moved to his knees.

“No, baby. Tonight is about you.” I said sweetly as I ran my fingers through his long hair.

“Shhh.” He smirked as he ran his fingers along my slit over the lace the covered me. I moaned and bent my knees, shooting my hips forward and into him.

“Don’t baby, I don’t want to come just yet.” I winked at him. “I’m so horny for you.” I whined as I tugged on his hair again.

“Those fights turn you on? And the goals?” He asked, still running his hands over my center.

“You have no idea.” I said, still bending my knees to feel his fingers more, as if he was going to enter me.

He ran his hands up my legs as he stood up, letting his mouth stop at my sex. He bit me gently through the fabric, causing my knees to go weak.

“Don’t do that to me. Not yet.” I scolded as I regained my strength and dragged him to the bed.

I threw him onto the bed and climbed on top of him, sitting on top of his growing erection. I slowly unbuttoned his dress shirt and pulled it off of him, running my hands up and down his chest and abdomen underneath his undershirt. I swiftly pulled his undershirt off of him and slightly gyrated my hips on top of his clothes, making him harder and harder.

“Baby,” He got out after a series of sharp breaths.

“Shhh.” I said as I kissed him gently to silence him.

Moving to his pants, I unbuckled his pants and slid them down to his ankles, moving myself so I could remove them completely. I did the same with his briefs and freed his erection from confinement. He moved his right hand to his cock, slowly stroking as he looking me up and down.

“No.” I scolded as I moved both of his hands above his head.

“Oh, this is how it’s going to be tonight?” He asked with a sexy smile.

“This is how it’s going to be.” I answered with my bedroom eyes.

“This thing is kind of itchy.” I began as I pulled the fabric away from both of my breasts. “I think I should take it off.”

“Please.” Tom said as he moved his hands to my breasts.

I slowly moved my hair to the side and undid the halter knot that was keeping me covered. I slowly slid the fabric down my body and climbed out of it, placing my center on top of his throbbing length.

“God.” Tom sighed.

“What?” I asked with a smirk.

“My baby is so sexy.” He answered as he pulled me down to suck on my breasts. I let him lick both of them, moaning out in pleasure as my center grew more and more warm. As he sucked, I moved on his dick, not letting it enter me just yet. I moved slowly, just slow enough to drive both of us crazy. I gently bit down on his shoulder as my pussy throbbed against him.

“Fuck me, baby.” He whispered softly as he bit my earlobe.

I took his orders and sat up just a little, allowing his length to match up with my entrance. I slowly slit down, stabilizing myself on his abs. I moaned as he filled me and his hands pressed firmly on my hips, pushing me farther and farther down.

“Ride me.” He begged.

I moved forward and placed several gentle kisses on his lips as my bottom half pulsed up and down on his length. He moaned out in pleasure as I kissed from his neck to his shoulders, picking up the pace. My center grew more wet as we continued, some of my juices making noise as I increased my speed.

“I think your pussy is calling my name.” Tom whispered as his bit at my earlobes.

“That’s the only name it knows.” I shot back with a seductive smirk, sitting upright and moving my hands to his lower abs. Tom placed his hands on my breasts and squeezed as I continued to move faster and faster, dancing on him dick. He bucked his hips into me to increase pleasure as I continue to bounce up and down on top of him. Reaching behind me, I grabbed his balls and massaged as I rode him all the way into oblivion. His breathing grew erratic as he neared completion, taking me by the hips and flipping me over. He slammed into me until we both reach our climax together.

“Scored three goals tonight.” Tom whispered as we collapsed next to each other.


Pairing: Fili x Reader

Characters: Fíli

Warnings: Mentions of Death (Sorry)

Word Count: 2, 246 (I’m so sorry…again)

Note: This one-shot with Fíli x Reader was requested by the lovely girls who wanted a second part! Hope you guys like this one as much as the first! <3 

1. Oh my goodness!!! Please let there be a part 2 with Fili’s reaction when Kili tells him and gives him the stone!!! Please?!?!?

2. While reading this I had to like stop myself from crying because my roommate is sitting right next to my lol but yes I vote for round 2 lol

3. PLEASE!!! Please may we have a second part?!?!? 

Links: Part 1 Part 2

How unbearable it had become for me to awake alone each morning, for the past two and a half years in nothing but the dried tears of sorrow and misery to keep me company. Deeply inside, at the roots of my soul, I knew that nothing was to be the same any longer but I didn’t want to admit it. I loathed to admit it.

Why? I had pathetically questioned myself countless and numerous times. What had I done to the heavens to deserve such punishment? What had I done to anger Illuvatar?

Even the torturous, long days seemed to mock me as they took an eternity to pass by. The blowing winds did so as well, whenever I would decide to leave my house - which was once every blue moon. The winds seemed wicked as I heard them scream in my ears. There was absolutely nowhere I could go to hide myself from the rest of the world or perhaps bury my foolish deeds as deep as I could into a whole in the ground. But I was certain that even the soil of this Earth wouldn’t want to partake in my measly matters.

Therefore, I decided to do what any heartbroken, lonely woman would do - I locked myself in my own home, lay my head upon the pillow, letting the heavy slumber aid me in escaping reality. And what a crass idea that had been!  

I had jolted awake every time, with the familiar feeling of my pulsing heart hammering against my ribcage, as it seemed that at any point, my heart would break through it. My dark, luscious hair would be damply sticking to my neck and forehead and furiously, I’d rub my eyes, thinking it would make the nightmare disappear. I wouldn’t even want to begin describing the horrifying details of the same spiralling abyss that was my nightmare. But the only thing I cloud say was it always portrayed a figure that looked a lot like Fíli.

And when I got out of my bed to sit at the kitchen area, I’d clearly picture the future where Sigrid was Queen Under the Mountain and by her side, was Fíli grasping a tight hold of her hand as he’d smile handsomely at her before leaning over for a passionate kiss. 

I’d often imagine Sigrid being the mother of Fíli’s heir and he’d tolerate her little knowledge of politics for her natural beauty. And even if I’d ever cross the Durin Prince’s mind, he would only be thinking as to what had happened to me and why I had chosen to flee from Erebor. As in regard of the stone Fíli had engraved for me, it would possibly be tossed carelessly under the mountains of treasures in Erebor, where it would be forgotten.

A sudden, vigorous knock at my door, rendered me to almost spill my hot tea all over my dress. Sighing, I wipe my mouth and swiftly walk over to open the door. As I do, I try my best not to roll my eyes in utter annoyance. For heaven’s sake, I definitely need to move…

“G’day to you, (Y/N)!” Rosa and Rhoda, the twin sisters that were my rather-too-nosy neighbours greet in unison. Once I had moved to this small town at the outskirts of Bree, these two hadn’t stopped disturbing me for a long while. They claimed to know everything that happened in this town and apparently, since I had been the most interesting topic of conversation for about…well, since I had arrived, Rosa and Rhoda were determined to find out everything about my life; even if it meant inviting themselves to the doorstep of my lonely home. Which currently seemed to be the situation. 

I tried to genuinely smile at them but my eyes betrayed me. Not only that but the corners of my lips fought so hard to rest and reveal the true way I was feeling. But I couldn’t let that happen, not after realizing that everyone in this town, nicknamed me “Mysticus Mary”.

“Yes, good day to you as well, girls.” I greet as I place my hands on my hips, looking from one redhead to the other. “What can I do for you?”

“We just had gone shopping,” Rosa replied, beaming up at me, her twinkling honey-brown eyes never seizing to give me chills.

“In the market!” Rhoda exclaimed as her small hands reached to her bag and presented me with a wooden box. Quizzically, I raise my eyebrow and look between them for an answer. “It’s quite…lovely but I’m going to need more information than that.”

The girls giggle, nudging each other at the elbows before Rhoda opens the top to reveal what seemed to be some sort of board game. “It’s called deleb, it is said to be the favoured pastime of the Valar.” Although, I did not care how these girls spent their fortunes, at this moment I couldn’t help but feel a little concerned. “Do you really believe that? It’s just another trick from the seller to get you to buy it.”

“Perhaps,” Rosa replied, shrugging. “But there isn’t anything like this in this town. So, as special as it is, we thought we’d play it together.” As Rosa said this, she lightly pushed me out of the way and scurried to my living room with her sister right behind her as they giggled like innocent toddlers. Irritably, I shut the door and involuntarily made way to the living room. “This was not the way I wanted to spend my evening.” I mumble to myself.

It would be quite difficult to believe if I, the so-called mysterious woman, told anyone in town that I had spent my whole night playing this game of deleb with the two infamous taletellers. Honestly, it was a thrilling yet irksome board game with simple and straightforward rules. Throw a one, four, or six, the player received an extra turn. The player can’t land on his own pieces. The first player to get all of their pieces off the board wins the game. Yes, quite simple and it would have been much more enjoyable if I hadn’t had to play with such nettlesome girls.

Nightmares would have haunted me just the same, therefore being too scared of taking a short nap, I sat by the window pane, as night turned to dawn. This morning came with an orchestrated musical silence, one that the soul is only able to hear the melody of and the ears could not. A new day had come and many deemed it to be filled with new possibilities, a fresh page yet to be written. But not for me…

Though, like a marvellous oil painting, I did admire the daylight sent shimmering rays over the hills that are clothed in green blankets, bestowing upon them a soft, golden path. I blinked toward the sun as its crown peaked over the faraway hills, rendering me to sigh contently from the rays that soothed my heart. I was about to place my head against the glass, sleep reigning over me, when I heard a pounding knock at the door and every cell of my body grew rigid. Though, I did not know why I froze.

Slowly, I walk out of the living room, sliding the door closed, so, whatever business was going to be happening outside, it would not to wake my uninvited guests. Who was visiting me at this hour of the day? Couldn’t these people leave me in peace? As these thoughts raced through my mind, I reach to open the door.

“Alright, what is - ” I stop myself mid-sentence as my eyes immediately widened. My heart races rapidly as I’m facing a dozen dwarf guards standing in their military stance. The reason my heart was racing was not due to the fact that they were dwarves but because two of them held the bend flags depicting the royal emblem of Erebor. This could have only meant one thing…

Just as I thought, he appeared from amongst the dwarven soldiers. My breath caught in my throat and blood rushed to my face. He was wearing the crown of Erebor upon his brow and his golden hair outshone the very rays of the sun, making it cower in envy. His calloused hand rested upon the grip of his heavy sword as his azure eyes met mine. Slowly yet confidently, he invited himself into my home, strutting as he did so, but not before shouting a command to his soldiers in Khuzdul.

Once the door was shut, I wondered what he was thinking or feeling at this moment. Was he angry? Was he saddened? Or perhaps Kili had told him of my last words and he had come to ridicule me of them. Apart from that, my eyes roamed at every perfect detail of his features as if I was doing my best to memorize them once more before he’d leave me again. He seemed even more mature than he was when we had met at Bag End; stronger - I noticed as my eyes traveled southward - with hands that were capable of absolutely anything. 

The Durin Prince stepped closer to where I stood and reluctantly I stepped back, squeezing my hands together, trying my best to hold his intense gaze. That was when I realized that the light, warm blue of his eyes was replaced with a darker hue. “Do you know how long it has taken me to find you?” Fíli questions, his voice lower than his usual tone. Before I could even think of how to answer him, he adds, “Why did you leave? Without even bidding a simple farewell?”

I narrow my eyes at him. “I had told Kili - ”

“Me.” He interrupted, tersely, “Why didn’t you say goodbye to me? Was it truly that easy when you took the decision to run away?” 

“Never.” I reply, biting harshly at my trembling lip. Fíli exhaled, momentarily looking to the floor, shaking his head, then reaching to the pocket of his fur coat. The first tear broke free and it was hard for me to contain the rest as they followed in an unbroken stream. In his palm, he held what I had thought could have been casted away to the rest of the treasures.

It was the stone. Kidhuzel

“And this,” Fíli demanded, “why did you leave this behind? I thought I had told you it was yours to keep as a token.”

I shook my head, lowering my gaze, unable to look at the dwarf I loved so much, in pain. “I left it on purpose.” I whisper, hoping he hadn’t heard what I’d said. But of course as angry as Illuvatar was, he’d never side with me today.

“Why?” Fíli asked, his eyebrows knitting in confusion. Silence lingered in the air, like a thick void of my own dark shadow. Fíli grew more agitated by the second that passed, so in his authoritative voice, he orders me, “(Y/N), I want an answer.”

I sigh and swallow nervously. “Because I…I didn’t want to keep feeling the pain when I looked at it or held it.” 

Fíli frowned as I felt a fear rise inside me. “What do you mean? I made it as a symbol to represent our friendship.” 

I looked across my guest room to the burning fire in the chimney. Somehow, as of that moment, the burning flames seemed to match the same inferno I was feeling in me. “Yes, I am well aware of that.” I reply, sullenly and Fïli noticed the hesitation of my voice. “What aren’t you telling me?” He pressed, with a gravity in his voice. “(Y/N), tell me what’s troubling you.” 

My eyes blurred with tears and I furiously wiped them away, “It’s nothing.”

“Clearly not. Kili told me you were upset before you had left. He also told me that you wanted me to keep the stone.” Instantly, I look up at the handsome dwarf to meet his softened gaze. And with much doubt, I asked, “Did he tell you anything else?”

Fíli’s expression was unreadable as he nodded, making his braid-stache swing back and fro. “Aye, he said the rest as well. but I want you to say it…this time to me, not my brother.”

I made a dismissive gesture with my hand. “Does it matter now? You are married to Sigrid and you are King Under the Mountain while I am a low-life human, a daughter to a farmer.”

When Fíli made no effort to answer, I realized the grief that came in waves and threatened to consume him entirely. He was at the mercy of its whims as it engulfed him entirely: strangling his veins and cobwebbing his mind. Fíli’s grief disappeared just as quickly as it had shown. As, now, a burning rage hissed through his body as he clenched his jaw firmly and tightened his hands into fists. 

“Oh Mahal,” I swore, “Fíli, what’s happened?” I ask, moving closer to where he stood, achingly wanting to comfort him.

“Sigrid,” He murmured, “She’s died. After she’d given birth to our son.”

Clearly, there will be another part to this…cause I got way too carried away! BTW, Rosa and Rhoda are going to be on the next part, just thought I’d let you guys know, if you’d gotten confused.

Ofcourse anon ^^ Brace yourself as I only need a reason to ramble XD

Rai really is too reserved. I remember having a few conversations on tumbler at the start of this arc on how Rai looking out for the children was more out of duty than care, as opposed to Frankenstein. Because he shows so little emotions its really hard to guess. Let me see if i can find any again: Here is some of it. But now this far in current arc, esp after 444, its clear he values his children much more than I thought. Rai has just been so desperate, and cute this arc trying to save M21, I really grew to admire their relationship.

For Rai, I think even before the first moment he had actually interacted with M-21, he has already had his heart softened towards him. Can we forget the Frankenstein would have killed M-21 if it wasn’t for Rai? One of the reason for this instant consideration is that, back then, M21 and M24 were the first modified he had come across (after Frankenstein), and their pitiful abandoned existence that didn’t really have a home anywhere, neither human, nor Nobles nor any other species would accept them, saddened him greatly. After them, there was so many modified one after the other the novelty wore off lol.

And then, the more he came to realize M21s trauma and just how damaged he truly is, the more he started caring for him. All very gradually, and quietly. While we saw Frankenstein’s care and each moment outwardly, with Rai it happened inwardly enough to even ignore if one isn’t looking carefully. Then M21 had stepped in to protect him from the Elders is definitely one of the highlight of M21s interaction with Rai, and it genuinely warmed his heart. He hasn’t have this kind of individual interaction with any of their other child. Rai has come to defend him by words more than once too, one when he was beating himself over KSA, and one when he asked for Mark’s awakening, and there may have been others. Then Franky and him actually discussed his mental/emotional health before deciding that they should get his comrades name from Crombel. All this has been a privilege not bestowed upon any other child, partly because they don’t need it.

The whole Mark saga infact, raised Rai’s worry for him 200% I think, by now, M21 is Rai’s favorite kid hands down imo. He also seems to remind him of Frankenstein in his unruly days, a much milder Frankenstein so there’s that plus point.

Frankenstein/M21 had always been one of my most favorite parts of Noblesse. Frankenstein started getting soft towards M21 very early on like Rai. The first moment where he noticed that hey this kid is not bad, was when M-21 had called him to warn him about Jake and Mary in S1, and Frankenstein was like,isn’t it a bit too kind of you to tell me everything in detail? This was when he gave them the safe house address to hide if they want.

The scene after M24s death, when M-21 had told them causally how all of the 100 M series died on him. The first time i read this scene I thought Franky expressions were him evaluating if this guy is telling the truth or not. Now I think he was like what poor kid. Master we have managed to pick up a really unfortunate puppy. Rai was clearly hurting for M21 far back then too. But saving the kids in DA-5 arc was definitely what sealed his worth in Frankenstein eyes. He would not have blamed him if he had chosen otherwise I’m sure, it was a very tough situation M21 was in, but he exceeded his expectations there.

Also spoiler alert ahead if you aren’t upto date with the canon unreleased chapter.

I was quite disappointed with the fact that it was RK5, not Frankenstein or Rai who saved him from the crazy Green werewolf. I’d been musing so many ways he could be saved this arc by either one of them the entire last year and hugged to death and what not. Then came RK 5 to take all the glory. I’ve now grown to like this development for various reason now, but it took a couple weeks to come to terms with  -_-

M-21s is a cute lil baby. He should be allowed to talk however he likes XD Frankenstein and Rai knows he needs this freedom to acquire some measure of self-worth and value. So yes, they let him. M-21 genuinely tries hard to be respectful to Frankenstein too. Most of the times he has been blunt or rude were extreme circumstances, like when he snapped him out of darkspear influence during Frank/Rajak, or when he was arguing about Mark authenticity or letting him awaken. M21 will dare not disrespect Frankenstein deliberately, Franky’s too scary for that.

Also I think atleast initially, M-21, not Tao, was meant to be the one who can be upfront with Frankenstein and snap him out of a moment of weaknesses, but this particular relationship point hasn’t really been used again after Rajaks fight as far as I can remember. Maybe when/if its Frankenstein’s arc with his old student Tasume then it will be utilized again. I’d very much like to see it again.

And M-21 is their first child. Ofcourse he is special ^^ Okay its probably my bias speaking too, but M-21 is hands down the most troublesome of their kids. 4th and 5th arcs issues are direct results of his actions, Rai even has to go to sleep in 5th due to his comrade’s saga, so yeah they are well aware that this child needs extra attention. Plus there’s the fact that M-21 is the most traumatized of their kids and arguably has suffered the worst in life (can we deny that he still gets the worst of all, like how many times has he been stabbed by now?) Which means that they are hands down the most worried about him = more blankets to wrap him in = more protection = more space in their worried minds and hearts ^^

Though every child has their own special place too, Seira is probably Frankenstein’s favorite due to her helping him in household work and bc of how obedient she is. Tao is Frank 2, so he is obviously special. Takeo and Regis are the most normal of them, and as such the most easily to be ignored by Frankenstein, unfortunately or fortunately for them.

I do not think Rai knows anymore about his heart other than that it is of a werewolf. If he knew anymore, he would have revealed to Frankenstein atleast by now. Though, it could be that its Ashleens and Rai will eventually figure it out… even in this arc, dare we hope.

I would LOVE if Crombel does something like this. Infact, before this arc I was very sure this is exactly what’s going to happen triggering the start of the end of Crombel and M21s comrades name or heart owners saga. But then came this arc, and this kidnapping of M-21 had been so heavy and long, and pretty much everything he didn’t want to happen has happened with him already as a hostage, which lessens the chances of another kidnapping.

Then again, children have been kidnapped some 3-4 times now? by comparison M21 is only at his 2nd yet. So maybe he’ll get taken once more before the end? It’ll be hard to summon that much worry by household this time and M21 will feel like shit for getting abducted yet again, so I don’t know how authors will manage to make it fresh. Crombel has been a villain since the start though, he needs to live upto his hype in any case so he better do something for once.

Also anon I don’t know if you’re into fan fictions, but there are some really good ones who explore some nice Crombel/M21 in such setting. Over the top of my head there’s these 3 where Crombel takes him back. if you hadn’t read them yet, I’m sure you’ll really enjoy these and i’ll provide more food for thought:

 And please barge in whenever you like. I love talking about Noblesse ^^

Alone (pt 2)

Part 1

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader, Jimin x Reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: You’ve been in love with your best friend Taehyung for as long as you can remember, sadly he never saw you in that way. But now there’s someone else that’s special to him, and you can feel your heart breaking more and more each second.

Originally posted by myeong-su

It’s been four days.

Four days without so much as a text or call from Taehyung. Perhaps this wouldn’t seem like much to most people, but in the past the two of you rarely went an hour without some form of communication, even if it was just a stupid text message. You’d been sitting in your room the entire weekend, crying until you used up every tear in your body, and now there was just an emptiness within you. There was a huge void in your heart, and you can’t even remember what used to fill it.

You were currently sat cross legged on your bed, your laptop open in front of you as you continuously refreshed Taehyung’s feed, looking for evidence of activity. The last thing he’d uploaded was a picture of him and Sana together, at a fairground or something. She was leaning into him and his arm was around her waist, that alone made you feel slightly sick, they looked so good together even you couldn’t deny it. The perfect couple.

And all you could think was: it should be me, not her.

Keep reading


• your first impression of him was that he was extremely talented, you didn’t even notice his size or his aegyo, it was his talent that made an impact on you.
• when he first met you, his mind was in a frenzy, he thought you looked nice and wanted to get to know you more bUT HE WAS NEVER WARNED BY HIS PARENTS THAT HE’D HAVE TO TALK TO GOOD LOOKING PEOPLE IN HIS LIFE???? HE WASNT PREPARED FOR ANY FLIRTING !!
• he spent all night trying to write a song that he would sing to you when it came to asking you out but nOTHING WAS COMING TO MIND BC EVERYTIME HE THOUGHT OF YOU HE GOT ALL FLUSTERED THAT HE COULDNT THINK STRAIGHT :((( ;))) and when the members came in and saw there was a sea of crumpled paper on the floor and there jihoon is in the middle of it all staring at the ceiling bc he gave up lol. he eventually got the song done at like 5 in the morning
• but when he got to you the next day, he got so thrown off guard that he forgot the lyrics for a few seconds and he kept fumbling with his guitar and his voice was all shaky and all the confidence he had before went straight out of the window
• however you were so woo'ed by the fact he spent all night writing a song for you that you said yes before he could even say anything after the song.
• “damn it, I knew you’d say no, I TOLD THEM YOUD SAY NO BUT NOOO THE HYUNGS SAID TO GIVE IT A GO AND- wait what’d you say?”
• and he was so happy that he actually yelled YES and did a little happy dougie before realising you were still there oops and immediately regained composure and tried to act cool but you saw it all.
• your first date with jihoon was in this small cafe, where you two talked about yourselves and got to know each other more. he kept asking you if you wanted anything else and kept making sure you weren’t hungry, weren’t thirsty, weren’t bored, and things like that. suddenly, someone recognised jihoon and urged him to get on this little stage the cafe had and sing. poor boy was too caught of guard and started to protest but eventually the whole cafe started chanting his name - including you. and he sighed and stood on the stage BECAUSE HE WANTED TO MAKE U HAPPY
• “um hi, my name’s lee jihoon, and I’ll be singing ‘when I grow up’. this song… is dedicated to a very special someone that’s with me today, hope you like it.”
• afterwards he got a standing ovation from the crowd and he blushed bc he completely forgot ppl were watching him and bowed then like practically ran back to you and sank down in his seat bc omg this is embarrassing
• then he insisted to walk you home bc he didn’t trust you walking home by yourself just in case something bad happened.
• jihoon doesn’t like calling you nicknames in public bc that’s too cringey to even think about !! but when it’s just the two of you he calls you all sorts of things, 'jagiya, babe, baby’ and cute stuff like that aw
• but sometimes you purposely don’t respond to him unless he calls you babe in public bc you like to see him flustered oops
• “yah, y/n come here.”
• “…”
• “y/n?”
• “…”
• “ugh, b-b-babe?”
• “huh? you were calling?”
• your first kiss with jihoon was at like 3am, you hadn’t seen him in AGES bc he always locked himself in his studio, refused to come out and stayed there for as long as he pleased. then at 3 in the freaking morning you get a call from him and his voice is like a zombie and he literally sounds ded and your like BEB ARE U OKAY and he’s all like MHM I JUST RLLY MISS U RN COME OVER zJdjismdkendkdm
• and when he saw you he got a huge as smile and just went right up to you, took your face in his hands and kissed you and you just froze bc is this the lee jihoon you knew? but it was really cute bc right after he did that he got all blushy bc hE JUST DID THAT
• public skinship? NONONONO CRINGE CRINGE CRINGE !!!!!
• like even if he hasn’t seen you in ages, he will literally wait for all the members to single file exit the room until he can hug you and kiss you all he wants. he thinks all the members don’t watch but they do in any way they can lol
• has a habit of cringing over the smallest things, like he can’t do that bc in the scenario he’s imagining in his head, it’ll look too cringey!! and he does that thing with his hands where they turn into claws and he’s just like aaksnsksmam, you know what I’m talking about ;))
• he LOVES reward kisses! jihoon wants a kiss after every performance, after every practice, after every finished song, after everyTHING BC HE DID A GOOD JOB STANDING THERE QUIETLY HE DESERVES A KISS OK
• when lee jihoon wants affection, affection is what he shall get. he’ll just casually go up to you, even in front of the members, and hug you from behind or just kiss your cheek as if this ish was normal and your all flustered bc !!
• is a sports addict like it’s not even funny, whenever he has a chance to watch or play sports he’ll get so competitive and want to win and get all pouty when the team he was rooting for or when he loses.
• “jihoon, it’s okay babe”
• probably would start shedding little tears
• he especially likes to play sport with you bc he sees you get all flustered when he tries to teach you how to kick a ball properly in soccer bc his face gets too close occasionally when he’s trying to point something out from where your standing and yOU ARENT EVEN LISTENING ANYMORE YOUR JUST A BIG MESS ON THE FLOOR UR NOT OK
• constantly asks to get a pet dog bc he loves them lots and literally stops and drops whatever he’s doing just to play with a dog that just so happened to trot passed. but no matter what he says you always like no jihoon I am not getting a dog with you bc you’ll be gone most of the time and I’d have to take care of it all the time :((
• but one time you finally gave in bc he gave you the saddest look ever and you just hAD TO.
• he then proceeded to the take your dog everywhere he went. practice room, studio, in bed with him. EVeryWHErE
• “yah, it’s seems like you love the dog more than me *pout pout*”
• “whAT NEVER~”
• jihoon can’t eat spicy food, it’s like an allergy to him oops, this one time you two were having a dinner date and he accidentally ordered something but had no idea if it was so spicy or not and he literally drank 30 glasses of water straight, 5 tubs of ice cream and 2 ice blocks - you paying, and even after that he was all whiny about it bc his tongue felt swollen and spicy and he couldn’t talk properly without a lisp for the rest of the night, poor bby
• secretly bases all of seventeen’s songs around you and whenever you or someone else asks what his inspiration for the songs are, he always says it just comes to his mind whenever bUT NOP ITS ALL FROM YOU BC WHEN HE SEES YOU HE WANTS TO SHOUT MANSAE AND HE WANTS U TO KNOW HE ADORES U EVEN WHEN HES 20 AND HE’LL ADORE U WHEN HE GROWS UP BC YOU ROCK HIS HEAD. (yalls see what I did there lol I’m pathetic)
• has an addiction to bringing his song writing notebook everywhere he goes bc you never know when inspiration hits you, it’s a good thing is ofc, but he usually gets inspiration in the worst times like he’ll say something hella nice, hella romantic, hella sweet and he’ll just stop kid sentence and be like tHATLL BE GOOD FOR A SONG LEMME WRITE THT DOWN and then the mood is killed lol
• can’t stand couple items nop nop nop
• “jihoon-ah, let’s just get socks!!”
• “goodbye.”
• will just straight up leave the shop without saying a word bc all these cringe worthy items makes him feel nauseous and dizzy
• do NOT mess with jealous jihoon, he’d straight fight anyone if he gets jealous. in fact, he would fight EVERYONE, even you. he won’t talk to you for hours bc you weren’t supposed to hang out with the hyungs, you were supposed to hang out with HIM
• bc of his jealous trait, he ain’t afraid to show public skinship to prove that yOU WERENT AVAILABLE, NOT UNLESS HIS ARMS AROUND YOUR WAIST AND KISSES MEANT YOU WERE SINGLE NOP
• will miss interpret everything and make any excuse to get jealous
• “why you staring at her like that!? huh?? c'mon let’s fight.”
• “babe it’s just a waiter”
• his phone background is a photo he took of you when you were listening to the draft of a song he was working on you looked so happy and cute he was so proud to produce a song that made you feel like that that he had to take a photo to remember that moment aw
• your phone background is of the two of you the one time you managed to convince him into couple clothing, just coz it was your birthday and you said he’d be a bad boyfriend if he didn’t do it for you. you smiled in the camera all cheesy but when the photo was taken, woozi was just staring at yOU with this lovesick look on his face !!
• dates in the middle of the night at the park, on the swings, eating ramen, talking about life and looking at the stars yes.
• once he showed you all the instruments he played and you were so fascinated, especially by the clarinet. but you thought it was embarrassing to marvel over it in front of him so when he left you took it in your hands and just looked at every key and every part of the clarinet.
• but you had no idea it could pull apart into separate pieces so when it did do that you thought you broke it and you nearly cried
• you shamefully handed him the “broken” clarinet and literally had tears in your eyes and jihoon was like girl y u crying and just puts it back together and ur like WHAT THE
• his role as seventeen’s vocal team leader really does make a huge impact on jihoon, he’s always constantly stressed and burdened over the fact that he’s in charge of writing and producing and if the song is a flop, it’s all his fault. you always have to tell him whatever he makes will be good enough because he puts all the hours of hard work and effort into it. you tell him he’s talented and absoLUTELY up for the job as vocal team leader.
• “thank you jagi… really. you have no idea how much those words mean to me…”
• your first fight with jihoon was about how he’s always over working him to the point that it’s hazardous to his health, he wouldn’t listen and he was just like WHY DOES IT MATTER TO YOU IF IM LIKE THIS and you just lost it and was like BC I CARE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH WAY MORE THAN I CARE ABOUT MINE
• but you just left after that to cool off bc this was scary for you and you couldn’t face him
• and he’d apologise by showing up at your doorstep all timid and he’d take a steal forward and just hug you bc although he doesn’t like to express his love for you a lot hE MISSED YOUR TOUCH AND YOUR KISS AND YOUR FACE
• “I… Am so sorry.”
• late night Skype and phone calls will jihoon bc he likes to be there even if he’s in the studio, asking you about your day and watch you fall asleep on the screen in front of him.
• is a completely different person in the morning, he wants nothing but hugs kisses and love bc it’s too early, he shouldn’t be awake, he’d still be asleep if you hadn’t woken him up so the least you could do was shower him with affection tyvm
• lee jihoon might not be the most perfect boy in the world, he might have his flaws. he might not be everyone’s cup of tea but he just so happened to be yours. you are so important to him and he wouldn’t hesitate to save you from any discomfort your experiencing. he may not show his affection often, but he really, truly cares and loves you. he shows it in his own special ways, that on,t the two of you notice and it’s absolutely magic whenever he says those three special words.
• “jagiya… akkinda” ~woozi~~


Imagine – Sam and Dean helping you with your depression

Word Count – 6,916 (I’m so sorry, but wanted to make sure this was actually good. I hope it was worth the long read lol)

Pairing – Sam and Dean x Reader

Triggers – Depression, Suicide attempt, Alcoholism, Death of a family caused by demon, Cutting

A/N – I really want to get the special ending to Babysitting JJ with Jensen done but things have happened and I’ve been really either busy or to sad to write. It always helps to write out my feelings in a way like this so wanted to get this out of the way then try to write the special ending so sorry on the wait. Thank you to anyone who understands, and hope this fic helps you out.


One of your worst fears has always been getting possessed, or hurting someone who didn’t deserve it emotionally or physically. Maybe it was because that’s all your parents did at home was hurt you, or the bullies all through your years at school. You just couldn’t stand hurting people, not one bit.

Of course they both had to happen at the same time.

You woke up after being hit in the head while walking down an alley at the bar to get fresh air away from the smell of beer and smoke. You couldn’t tell where you were at all. It was dark, and cold. When you tried to yell for help you realized the sounds didn’t echo as it should’ve. Then when you tried to move your hand away from the knife on the table it wouldn’t move.

Your body was trapped and taken over, you were possessed.

You looked up and noticed Crowley sitting in front of “you”. The view of him made your stomach turn with disgust and anger. After all he did to Dean, all he did to Sam and Cas. You hated that man with a passion.

“You go out there, and you kill those Winchester boys. You kill anyone who gets in your way, or tries to stop you. They need to be gone and actually STAY dead this time. Do you hear me, Casey? Dead!”

“Yes, your master.”

“Good, that’s why I have you dressed in y/n’s meat suit. They’ll never see it coming.”

They finished the conversation with a hand shake. She walked over to the table and grabbed a few knives, and other things to kill your family with. You yelled for her to stop what seemed like a million times but all she did was laugh.

You were terrified.


You watched as the demon possessing your body kicked down the wooden door to someone’s house. It was a pretty big, clean and organized house. Filled with tons of happy photos of the family everywhere you looked. She walked up and placed her fingertips on one of the pictures. It was a man, his wife, a little girl who looked about 8 and a boy who looked around 10 along with a golden retriever smiling next to them.

Next thing you knew there was the same dog growling behind you. You turned around and gave it a mean stare, noticing it looked terrified and ran down to the other room. You smiled evily and walked slowly up the stairs. You slowly opened up one of the bedroom doors and noticed it was the parents. They were cuddling in bed fast asleep, probably because it was 3 AM.

“What the hell? Who are you! Get out of our house!” The man yelled, holding up his shotgun in defense.

“Honey, that is only gonna hurt the person inside me, but me? It’ll just feel like a few bumps.”

“I ain’t scared to shoot!”

He shot a few bullets into your chest and stomach. Casey or whatever her name was wasn’t wrong, it hurt like a bitch.

Him and his wife backed up with their hands up in defense.

“Who are you?! The wife cried

“I’m your worst nightmare.”

In a blink they were already both on the floor, getting torn apart by Crowley’s “Hellhounds”. You cried and screamed as you watched both of their lives get torn away. What will their kids do? Who will take care of the dog? What about the rest of their family.

“2 down, 2 to go.” She smiled.

“No! Don’t – please don’t hurt the children…please… this is enough.” You sniffled, but she didn’t care.

She walked in and noticed both of them shaking underneath their blankets along with quiet sobs from the little girl and the boy telling hushing her softly, telling her it’ll be okay.

It reminded you of Dean and Sam. This must’ve been how they were when they were younger. Sam panicking, wondering where his daddy was and why he wasn’t coming home while Dean tried to calm him down as he shook in fear against him.

“Don’t you fucking touch them!”

You watched as more hellhounds came in and blood flung all over the walls, the windows, blankets and covered the toys. You felt your heart break into a million pieces and your whole world far apart a long with theirs. You wanted to be in their spot. You wanted them to have a happy living life while you got torn apart and killed instead.

Casey walked out of the house with the biggest smile on her face, along with blood covering her hands and all over her clothes. She got back in your car and looked in the review mirror, eyes pitch black.

“Why are you doing this?!”

“Cause it’s fun! Don’t worry, the worst is yet to come.”


You pulled into your usual parking spot, turning off the car and getting out quickly. You tried all you could to make your legs stop moving, along with your hands knowing what was about to come. But of course as expected, she was stronger than you.

She knocked on the door loudly, hopping everyone would still be awake. You knew right away they would know it wasn’t you because you never knocked, especially to your own home. After a few minutes Dean opened the door with tired eyes and messy hair.

“y/n? It’s 4 AM. Where have you been and why did you knock? This is your home, remember.” You always knew he had a smart part in his head, just sometimes it’d be filled with sarcasm in the wrong time

“Uh, door was locked and I was out at the bar.”

“It wasn’t locked, but whatever. Just – call next time okay? Sammy and I worry about ya.”

You gave him a small nod along with a quiet goodnight then headed to your bedroom to “sleep”. You laid there and fought with yourself all night long.

“Those people are dead cause of you, are you going to really live with that for the rest of your life?”

“What? You’re not going to kill me?”

“Oh no! I want you to live with this, this guilt. I want you to suffer with it till the end of time, that’s why I did it. You don’t deserve happiness, y/n. Let alone comfort. All those failed hunts, people dying cause of you and the Winchesters? Innocent lives gone, cause of you.”

“Shut up.”

“Kill yourself”

“What?! No!”

“Come on y/n. We know you’ve been wanting to since the day your family kicked you out of your house and left you half dead on the streets. Since those kids made fun of you all throughout your school year, not letting you get to enjoy life for a second. Get it over with.”

“But what about Sam and Dean?”

“They don’t need you. They got each other and let’s face it sweetheart, you’re a pain in the ass anyways. You’re in the way of everything! So why not take yourself out?”

“Stop it, that’s not true.”

“Oh isn’t it? You’re such a fucking waste –“

“I said stop!” You yelled with anger.

The sounds of your door slamming open caught you and Casey out of your thoughts, turning your attention to it. It was Sam.

“You’re not y/n.” He grumbled, standing straight with both of his fists clenched with anger in his eyes while Dean stood behind him with rope and a smirk

“What are you talking about? Of course I am, Sam.”

“Y/n doesn’t talk to herself, especially talk to herself into suicide. Tie her, Dean.”

“My pleasure.” He walked up to you and tried his best to tie you up as your body tossed around angrily, biting and scratching him as he tied up your hands and Sam tied your legs together.

“Oh honey, I’ve already been bitten and scratched before, I kind of like it.”

He threw you over his shoulder and walked you into the trap room while Sam locked the cellar door behind you. He sat you down in the wooden chair and tied you up while Sam grabbed the bible and holy water.

“You really can’t do anything to save her, you know that right? She’s already dead inside.” Casey smirked, making the boys even angrier

“Yeah? Well you’re next.” Sam said, opening the book while Dean gave him a small nod, allowing him to go on

He threw the water on you and watched as you groaned and yelled in pain, seeing your flesh burn and turn into patches.

“Besides, not like she’s going to kill herself after this anyways.”

“You shut your fucking mouth.” Dean growled

“Oh! Do you kiss your mother with that foul mouth? Oh that’s right, I guess not. You really don’t know anything about her, do you? You don’t know the scars and burns she causes on herself but blames it on the hunts? The tears she’s shed every night? Your baby girl’s suicidal, Dean. And there’s nothing you can do about it. Especially after this, she’ll be ruined.”

He punched her in the mouth, causing her lip to bleed and bruise up but of course, all she did was smile. Sam gasped and froze until Dean yelled at him and told him to keep reading.

“You must do that a lot, don’t you Dean?”

“I’d never hurt y/n, you son of a bitch.” He screamed in her face, pounding his fist on the wooden chair’s arm rest in anger

“Oh? But you just did. I didn’t feel a bit of that, but she felt it all.”

The room began to shake and the lights started to flicker as Sam kept reading, along with the sounds of your screams and Dean yelling telling Casey to let you go. After what seemed like hours it was over, you were back. Their y/n was back. But not the way she used to be, never again.

Dean cupped your face with his palms as he yelled out your name, trying to wake you up or even see if you were alive. Your head leaned over him as blood fell from your lip. He laid your head on his shoulder as he hugged you tightly while Sam untied you.

“Please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead..” his voice broke as he rocked you

“Let’s take her to the couch Dean” Sam reminded him, placing his hand on his shoulder softly.

They carried you to the couch and laid you down gently, trying to not cause you any more pain than you’re already in. Dean paced around the room as Sam held a bag of ice on your head for you, talking to you to see if you’d wake up or notice his voice at all. Both hopping for a miracle, praying nonstop.

“I’m going to rip Crowley apart with my own hands, I swear to god.” Dean said, punching the brick wall after

“We’ll handle him later, now we just need to focus on y/n and make sure she’s not in a coma or anything.”

“Should we … should we ask her about what Casey said? About her wanting to kill herself, her scars and all that? How could we have been so blind…”

Sam sighed and ran his hand through his hair, shaking his head in disappointment.

“We’ll wait a little after she wakes up. We don’t want to scare her to much, I mean she was just possessed.”

Dean nodded and finally sat down, neither of him or his brother getting sleep that night.


You sighed when your eyes flickered open, not to mention you had a killer headache along with your whole body feeling like you just got hit by a truck. You looked over and noticed the boys laying in separate chairs fast sleep along with sleeping pills and beer next to both of them.

You had to stop yourself from taking that whole bottle of pills and chugging all that alcohol till it killed you. Not now, you wanted to see the boys first before you did anything. You looked over at the clock and noticed it was 8:15 in the morning, latest you’ve slept in in weeks. Usually you’d be awake at 4, then that’d be it for today but Casey must’ve token a lot out on you for you to sleep in an extra four almost five hours.

The sounds of a sleepy moose caught your attention, making you smile knowing you weren’t alone now with your thoughts. Sam always knew how to keep you happy, at least as much as it was possible for you.

“Hey sunshine, you feeling alright?” He croaked, rubbing his eyes with a smile

“Feel like I’ve been to hell and back”

“Well… you kind of in a way have. I’ll get you some aspirin and water.” He got up and began walking to the kitchen till you reached your hand out and stopped him

“Beer? Please..” You said with puppy eyes, while he gave you them back of course.

“You just woke up from all that hell, you need water.” You sighed and left him off.

Few minutes pass and Dean was up as well. The first thing he did when he woke up and turned around was look to see if you were okay or awake, he was glad to see both.

“Hey sweet pea, you put up a hell of a fight earlier.”

You chuckled and gave him a small nod while he got up and hugged you softly, still trying to be gentle with you and not cause any pain.

“I could say the same for you, thanks for busting my lip open asswipe.” You joked, making him feel bad

“I’m sorry, it’s just Casey said … some stuff that pissed me off and I didn’t think it through. Does it hurt? I’ll pay for anything to fix it ok –“ You cut him off, holding your hand up and shushing him

“It’s cool, Dean. I was joking.”

He smiled and hugged you again, this time a little longer. Sam came in and passed you the meds and water, thanking him after. He knelt down in front of you as Dean sat at the end of the couch by your feet both looking at each other then back at you with concern.

“Do you uh – remember anything?” Sam asked, giving you a sad and worried look.

Your heart broke as you remembered what happened. The images of the parents and the kids bodies getting torn apart flashed in your mind. You remembered the smell of the blood, the sounds of their screams and cries along with yours, and how Casey just stood there and smiled. How could anyone do that? Even a demon?

Sam and Dean must’ve took notice to your mood and put both of their hands on your knees in comfort, letting you know it’s okay.

“I….She…She made me….kill…a family..” You stumbled, taking them both to shock

“How many?” Dean asked

“So many, but this one… this one family, they looked so happy. It was a husband, wife, a little girl and I assume her big brother..”

“The mom and dad were sleeping before she killed them. They looked so peaceful and calm, then she came in and took it away. Then … we went into the kids room and the little girl was hiding underneath her blanket with the brother. The brother … was comforting her as she cried. They reminded me of you guys, how you guys have always looked out for each other now matter how scared you were.”

The boys just sat there and took everything in, both giving you hugs and comforting you as you cried against them, gripping onto both of them more and more as you cried. This was a nightmare, this wasn’t supposed to be happening.

“It’s all my fault, I should’ve … I should’ve stopped her.”

They both pulled away, giving you a look

“No, you couldn’t do anything she was taking over your body y/n. Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Sam said

“Yeah but I could’ve talked her out of it, Sam. I gotta go.” You got up to walk away until Dean grabbed your wrist gently trying to make you come back, until he noticed what was on under your sleeves as they rolled up.

Your heart dropped. You couldn’t even bare to look at the boys, your family. You never wanted them to find out, not this way and not now. Maybe when you’ve recovered you’d explain it but not now. Why, why, why.

“What the hell is this?” Dean said with shock, looking at you while you looked down at the ground with shame

“I said what the hell is this, y/n.”

You pulled your arm out of his grip and ran to your room, slamming the door and locking it after. You leaned back against the door and slid down it slowly, covering your mouth with your hands as you sobbed. Why was everything falling apart?

Sam and Dean ran to your door as fast as they could. They both banged, and banged, and banged along with telling you to come out but there was no chance. 10 minutes passed and they finally left you alone.

You looked around the room and remembered your blade you had hid from yourself awhile back to help you stop relapsing. You got up and tore apart your room to find it, then found it taped underneath your bed.

You sat on the floor, threw your jeans off and slid it against your thighs a few times, whispering “why” to yourself as you did as the tears fell and hit the cuts, making them burn even more.

“This is for not stopping Casey for killing those parents.”

“This is for not helping those poor kids”

“This is for letting Sam and Dean down, they don’t need me.”

“This is for not being there for Cas, Kevin or Charlie. I’m an terrible excuse for a friend.”

“This is for being me.”

After that you pulled out a box of whiskey you’ve hid underneath your bed away from the boys and drank till you couldn’t anymore. By the end of the night you were shitfaced drunk, crying into your pillow along with punching and breaking anything you could find.

The sounds of someone knocking got you out of your thoughts, making you groan tiredly.

“Go away” You grumbled into your pillow

“It’s your moose, Sam. Can I come in?” He picked the lock and came in anyways.

You felt the side of your bed dip in as he sat down and rubbed circles on your back as you buried your head in your pillow still not wanting to see his face of disappointment.

“Dean went for a walk, so I wanted to come talk to you alone.”

“Dean’s always fucking walking.” You slurred

Sam sighed and looked around your room, noticing all the whiskey bottles filling the floor and bed.

“You’re drunk, aren’t you?” You nodded with a chuckle

“You’re going to end up killing yourself if you carry on drinking like this, y/n.”

“Isn’t that the plan?” His heart broke at your words

“No! You’re supposed – supposed to live for me, and Dean! Cas, Charlie, Kevin! You’re family, y/n.”

“I just get in the fucking way. If I take myself out, you and Dean will probably be happier and not have me up your asses. You could move on and do hunts without worrying about me. So why not?”

Sam glared at you as he clenched his jaw. He was more sad then angry, but he was for sure angry. How could someone amazing as you feel this way about herself? They needed you! You were their rock, why couldn’t you see that? If only he could hack into your mind, and show you how wonderful and how much you meant to him and his brother.

“You know, I wish I could make you see how much you mean to all of us.” That’s the last thing he left you with.


The more the night went on the more you felt worse. You felt guilty for killing those innocent people, and for hurting Sam and Dean. You didn’t hurt them physically but hell you hurt the emotionally. You felt angry at yourself for everything and anything.

As everyone knows one of the two of your worst fears are hurting people. You couldn’t hurt Sam and Dean anymore if you weren’t here, so this only meant one thing.

You have to run away.

They were pissed at you anyways, so why would they care?

You slowly got up and walked over to your closet to grab your bag you usually take with you if you’re packing away for a few days, but this time it’d be forever. You were still drunk and dizzy which made walking hard, and hard to remember everything you needed. You threw your clothes in, your hairbrush and other hygiene things you need. On your way out of your room with your bag over your shoulder you noticed a picture on your dresser. A picture you took about a few months ago of Sam, Dean and Cas all standing there smiling and laughing along as if they didn’t just killed a monster a few hours before. You remembered that day as if it was yesterday.

-Few months back-

You and the guys finally finished a hunt you were working on for hours. Everyone was happy and relieved for the first time in months and damn it felt good not only for you but to see everyone happy like they deserve.

“I say we get some ice cream sundaes. We deserve it!” Dean smiled, wiping the blood off his face with a towel and changing his shirt in the car while everyone else did too. You passed Cas a spare white buttoned up shirt while he gave you a huge smile and a thank you as you helped him put it on.

“We’re all cleaned up, might as well.” Sam smiled with a happy sigh

“What are ice cream sundaes?”

Dean sighed with a smile as he patted Cas on the shoulder. “Oh buddy, you have no idea what you’re missing out on.”

You all sat down in the booth. Sam and Dean sat next to each other (of course) while you sat next to Cas. You all ordered your sundaes and ate away with smiles never leaving. Once Cas took a bite of his he looked at you all with a amazement while you all stared at him with smiles, waiting to see his reaction.

“This is …. Amazing. So much going on, I can’t even explain.”

“Do you love it more than burgers though?” You smiled while Sam and Dean gasped

“Oh no… I love burgers very much.”

You all finished your desert with happy conversations. Not a case was mentioned, not a worry if there was a demon or vamp around, nothing. It felt like you actually lived normal lives for once. Dean was even to caught up talking to you guys and enjoying the moment to much he forgot to ask the pretty waitress for her number.

You all stepped outside and rode home. The Impala was filled with the sounds of you, Sam and Dean singing classic rock loudly while Cas sat and wondered what the hell was going on. The windows were down, the sun was out, and you guys were happy.

When you finally arrived home you pulled out your phone, knowing if you didn’t capture this moment you’d regret it later. Thankfully you did, not knowing what was yet to come.

“What are you doing?! Don’t take pictures of me I’m not hot like Paris Hilton yet!” Dean laughed smiling for the camera anyways while Sam and Cas did too while laughing at Dean’s comment.

You kept that picture and printed it out then put it in a frame. The picture never left the top of your dresser. Not even when you were mad at them or having a fit, that picture would still be there not moving an inch.


You rubbed your thumb over the picture and watched as a stray tear hit and ran down the glass. You caught your sobs and placed the picture back down.

“I can’t take this with me.. If I do, I might come back..” You thought to yourself, wiping your face and closing your bedroom door softly.

You walked down the hall and noticed Sam and Dean were no where to be found in the bunker, which meant they had to be in their rooms or away on a hunt for some reason at 3 AM. You walked into the kitchen and grabbed a piece of paper then wrote down your goodbye, not taking to much time in it just in case one of them decide to wake up early or come home.

“Dear Sam and Dean,

I’m sorry. I’m sorry for hurting you, but that won’t be happening anymore. Tell Cas I’m sorry too. I love you guys, and thanks for making this place home for 7 years. Don’t come looking for me.


You grabbed your bag and a bottle of whiskey then quietly went out the door.

“Goodbye home.”


The second Dean woke up he knew today was going to be dreadful and bad, but he didn’t expect this.

“Sam!” He yelled on top of his lungs, looking at the paper

Sam ran down the hall as fast as he could, thinking he was in danger or something. He pulled out his gun and placed it down when he saw Dean standing in the kitchen with a note in his hands. The first thought that came to his head was you.

“She’s …. She’s gone.” Dean said, passing Sam the note and throwing the wooden chair against the wall, snapping it into pieces while Sam read.

“We gotta find her. I’ll track her phone.”

“No, her phone’s still here. Damn it, God damn it!”

Sam sat and thought then the greatest idea came to him.

“I uh … I have a tracking thing on her car.” He said awkwardly while Dean looked at him with confusion

“What? Like a stalker?!”

“Not stalking …. Concerned.”

Dean rolled his eyes and sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his two fingers in annoyance.

“Well, We’re gonna have to go full stalker on this one, Sammy. Pull it up, and let’s bring her home.”


After the boys found out where you were they were on the road right away. Sam had his laptop in his lap as he watched the tracking device go wherever you were. The sound of Sam’s phone ringing made both of them jump while Dean growled and focused back on the road looking everywhere for you.

“Hey Cas” Sam said with a sigh, wishing it was you.

“Hello Sam. How is everyone?”

“Uh not really good right now. Well um long story short but we….don’t know where y/n is.”

“What?!” Cas yelled through the phone.

“Hold on let me talk to him.” Dean said with anger, grabbing Sam’s phone out of his hand.

“Cas! Where the hell have you been?!”

“I have other things to do sometimes Dean. I’m not free for your attention all the time.”

“Did y/n pray to you at all throughout these few days? Tell me!”

“No! No I have not heard any word from her. I’m sorry, Dean.”

He swore under his breath then threw the phone back to Sam. Sam explained that he had to keep track of your car so he had to go, hanging up after. The drive went on for hours, then the car randomly stopped.



“The car stopped, it hasn’t moved for like 40 minutes.”

“What! Why didn’t you tell me!?”

Sam sighed while he punched the wheel, pulling over on the side in the middle of nowhere to get some air and walk around, as he usually does when he’s angry. He got out and slammed the door, making Sam jump as he kept searching up ways to track your car. He heard Dean yelling and cussing the whole time, kicking and punching the car, tree, and the ground. He was furious, mostly with himself.

He leaned against the car and shoved his face in his hands, letting the quiet sobs he’s been holding in for so long come out. He looked up at the sky as his tears fell down his face, not even noticing Sam came out and was sitting behind him.

“Why do I push everyone away?” He said, looking back down at the ground

“You don’t, Dean. You didn’t cause this –“

“Bullshit! I got angry at her once I saw her scars even though I knew! I just .. I just wished Casey was lying, and she actually didn’t hurt herself or feel that way about herself. She’s so amazing, you know? Why do the good people get hurt the worst?”

“I wish I knew, brother.”

“I just want her to come home. I want to make sure she’s okay, Sammy. I want her home and I want us to take care of her. Even if she doesn’t let us at first we’re going to try all we can. I just hope she’s safe..”

After a few more minutes of Dean ranting and Sam listening he heard his laptop beeping from inside the car. They both looked over and noticed the spot was moving again. They both ran in and drove right away, not even giving the car a chance to warm up.


You stood on the bridge and looked down at the water. This was it, you were done. This was your last moment alive. Even though it was a pretty scene, your favorite thing to look at was the stars and the moon shining in the water, now it’d be the last view you’d see.

Before you could jump and say goodbye you heard the sounds of an Impala rolling up, fuck. Your heart pounded as the sound got closer, then you saw the lights and heard the tires screech.

“Dean don’t –“ Sam said, trying to stop Dean as he marched angrily at you.

You held your hands up in defense and was ready to jump till he wrapped his arms around your body and hugged you tightly, carrying you off the railing and sitting against the wall of the bridge with you in his arms. He leaned his head against your back as you sat in between his legs not even bothering to fight him off cause how tight he was holding you, there was no point.

Sam ran out of the car and stopped in front of you, kneeling down and placing a stray of your hair behind your ear and kissing your forehead while they both cried of happiness. You felt the back of your shirt soak up as Dean cried, and could see the tears welling up in Sam’s from the moonlight.

“Oh y/n, thank god you’re safe. Thank god we came in time.” Sam said, hugging you again.

“Let’s go home, please.” You said softly.

Home. You were going home.

The drive home was really quiet and awkward. You could cut the tension with a knife. Nobody was angry only at themselves. You kept your eyes on the window next to you but you could feel Sam and Dean giving you small glances from the mirror to make sure you didn’t take any pills in the back or anything.

After 5 hours you finally arrived home. It was around 5 AM now so usually you guys would be heading to bed for two hours but there was no hope for sleep tonight, not after everything.

Dean carried your bag in and helped you put everything away as Sam sat with you on the couch and talked to you about everything.

“I’m glad you didn’t do it, y/n. We need you more than anything. You’re our rock and I’m not sure why you don’t see that.”

“Cause … I always get in the w-“

“No, no. Do not talk like that, okay? Cause none of it is true! I know you think you screw up a lot, I know you feel guilty for killing that family even though it was really Casey doing it but with your body. I know you feel out of place, and like you don’t matter but you truly do! You’re a beautiful individual and we love you very much. Everyone makes mistakes, it’s human. But you shouldn’t let them take over you. You’re you, y/n! You’re an amazing, beautiful, smart, caring girl not to mention you can kick mine and Dean’s ass in a few minutes cause you’re so bad ass” You laughed at that part as he did too.

“Look, none of this is your fault. It’s not because you are weak, it’s not because you are scared it is because you’re hurting. You’ve been dealing with Dean and I for 7 almost 8 years which is a hell of a long time. Maybe after this, when you’re all well and everything we’ll take you out for sundaes again. We can even invite Cas along with us we all know how much he loves those sundaes.”

You sniffled with a smile as Sam wiped your tears away, kissing your cheek after.

“We love you y/n. And we’ll help you fight this battle, just like you help us with ours. Always Keep Fighting for us, please.”

You both hugged for about 5 minutes until you heard Dean clomp his boots against the wooden floor and come back in with a pie in his hands. A piece for you, Sam and him.

“I’ll even let you have the last piece.” He smiled at you.

You finished the night off with catching up on Dexter and drinking beers along with eating pies and ice cream. Sam even tried making homemade sundaes but they weren’t exactly what he expected, which was okay of course.

Dean looked over and noticed the scars on your thighs, and how they looked newer than the others. Once Sam looked over and noticed what he was staring at, he understood.

“y/n? are those … new?” Dean asked while you nodded shamefully.

“Sammy, grab the alcohol and bandages please.” He got up and left straight away, leaving you alone with Dean. You gave him a “I’m sorry” look while he gave you a hug, letting you know he’s not mad.

When Sam came back you laid out on the couch in your underwear, not being the first time you went through this with them being a hunter and all. Sam did the work as Dean held your hand, trying to keep you calm as he knew how much you hated doing this.

“It’s okay y/n. You’re so strong you can do this.” He reminded you, running your hair back and kissing your head as you groaned in pain.

He talked to you about memories to calm you down, even memories that were embarrassing for him but still made you and him laugh, even Sam while he was cleaning you up. You never realized how much you needed these two dorks to keep you sane till now.

After you finished you all decided to go to bed. The boys walked down the hall with you as you all  walked side by side and talked, like usual

“Hey y/n, if you want me or Sammy can stay with ya tonight just to make sure you’re uh .. you know.”

“Dean, I’m okay I promise. Really.” He gave you a small nod while they both hugged you, telling you goodnight.


You woke up covered in sweat, tears and the sounds of your screams. The door busted open and slammed against the wall, lights being off all you could see was a shadow figure making you panic more. You screamed and covered your face with your blankets, asking for whatever or whoever it was to go away until you heard a voice you would always remember, Dean’s.

“Y/n?! y/n! It’s me! Hshhhh., it’s okay. I’m right here it’s okay.” He panicked, cupping your face and laying your head on his chest as he held you.

He noticed your breathing starting to settle down and let the tears flow. He didn’t ask what was wrong, or begged you to tell him. He knew you’d tell him when you were ready, and he was willing to help you till you’re there.

“See? You’re safe. I got you, I got you.”

“The nightmares Dean… they’re horrible.”

“I know sweet pea, I know.”

“The kids…the parents… they were in my dream. They were all circling around me and asking why, WHY! I didn’t know how to fucking answer, cause I don’t know why Casey did it! If I knew and if I could give them closure I would, but I can’t Dean. I can’t!”

He let you rant as much as you needed. He let you cry as much as he wanted, not caring if his shirt was going to be soaked after. He knew you needed him, needed him now more than ever and he was going to be here.

“Think about the sundaes we’re going to have once you’re better, darling. Think about the good times. Think about Dexter. What do you think is going to happen next? I’m so excited to find out. Think about that day we went out and got sundaes with Cas and Sammy and how we finished the night playing board games together. We can do that again sometime this week if you want? I kind of miss it even though you always kick my ass in Monopoly. Think about me, think about Sam. Think about how much you mean to us. We love you, so, so much. You have no idea how sane you keep us just by being here. We NEED you!”

He stopped talking to catch some air and looked over and noticed the picture frame sitting on your dresser. He reached over and grabbed it, then laid back down with you in his strong arms. He rubbed his thumb over the picture, just as you did before you left but he was smiling instead.

“You still have this?” You nodded of course

“You didn’t take it with you?”

“No… I couldn’t…”

He noticed your voice get quiet so he stopped and talked happier things, happier thoughts to keep his girl happy.

“We’re gonna be smiling down at this when we’re 70 and in rocking chairs.” You both chuckled as he put it away.

“I cried when we couldn’t find you, y/n. I actually .. cried. I cried in front of Sam and you know how rarely I let people see that side of me. I was so fucking scared. I was so relieved to see you didn’t jump, I don’t know what I’d do with myself if you did.”

“I’m glad I didn’t too, Dean, I’m so sorry.”

“I’m not gonna leave you, ever. Not when you’re having an episode, not if you’re stressed or in a pissy mood. Family sticks together through the good and bad. Even if we weren’t family I’d still stay, cause I care about you. I’m going to stay with you tonight, so if you need anything I’ll be right here.”

He got up to get his pillow and blanket to lay on the floor with till you stopped him with a sad look he could barley see from the darkness of the room, but he could tell something was wrong.

“Where are you going?”

“I was going to go get my pillow and blanket to sleep on the floor with..” He said with an awkward, shy tone

You patted the spot on your bed next to you and nodded over to him. He looked at you with confusion, wondering why you would ever allow him to sleep in the same bed as you. Most the time if you had to share beds in a motel you’d share with Sam, only because you thought Dean wouldn’t want to.

“Sleep with me, please? I don’t want to be scared anymore. I’m so tired of being scared.” He didn’t ask twice and laid back down

He wrapped his arms around your waist and laid his head against your back as you smiled against him. You placed your hand on top of his as it rested on your stomach as you laid on your side, making him smirk too. He gripped on tighter and eventually you both fell asleep peacefully for the first time in what seemed like forever.

It was good to be home.


anonymous asked:

If you're still doing prompts and are comfortable writing it, how about either cam girl ladybug or cam boy chat noir? Personally I'd love to see how you'd write cam boy chat noir but it's your choice :) only if you're comfortable writing it xx


Ah, you are really sweet anon, asking me if I’m comfortable with it. That’d be a yes, lol. I’m not the best writer for sin, but I’m trying. Also, I kind of thought of a cam au before and you just gave me a reason to write it lol. And I’m glad you are more interested in cam boy Chat, cause that would have been my pick. So here we go.


Adrien honestly didn’t remember how this started. No, literally he didn’t remember. He was pretty convinced he make an account on that site while drunk and sad. Seriously, his brain, in drowned in sadness and expensive wine said ‘hey, why don’t you become a cam boy, you are handsome enough for people to pay to see you get naked’. And he actually did it. What possessed him to actually keep the whole thing on? A feeling of extreme confidence and sexiness that he had the nerve to display only while wearing a mask. The mask was part of the appeal sure, though Adrien wore it at first because the last thing he needed was pictures or videos of Adrien Agreste doing cam work. That would have been a scandal he would never get out of.

Keep reading

SLFL Tinley Park Soundcheck!

This is everything I could remember off the top of my head but I also took an audio recording during soundcheck so if I missed anything I’ll add it in later 😊

• They were all wearing shorts and hats & Michael and Luke had theirs on backwards (they looked so good holy shit)

• Calum and Ashton were twinning in the black world tour t-shirt and they both sat together on the platform on Calum’s side of the stage. 

• Luke was wearing one of Jack’s “Hemm” t-shirts and he sat on his platform in the middle of the stage. 

• Michael was barefoot lol he pulled the stool from the piano over to the edge of the stage and propped his feet up on the speakers and had his legs all spread open lmao he was straight chillin. he was super goofy and random and was in a really good mood :)

 • Calum looked sad or tired or something… he was super quiet the whole time and only talked a few times :( 

 • Michael was running from a bee on stage at one point and it was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen  lmao 😂 

• When they first came out on stage they introduced the song by saying it was a new one and then joked around about it being Free Bird haha but they played Girls Talk Boys. 

 • Q: favorite show of the NA tour so far?? of course they said hopefully Chicago would be their favorite after tonight. They talked about how amazing the tour has been and how much they always love the NA leg of the tour and they love playing all the outdoor amphitheaters. Luke said they come out every night & try to make each show better than the last one. 

• They recognized 2 girls wearing cheese hats from last tour lol. Ashton told them they had a “nice look” and that if they worked for a cheese company, they would be well known lol. When they introduced themselves they said they’re from Wisconsin and Michael was like “oh well now the cheese hats make sense, you didn’t tell us that last year! I thought you were just wearing a cheese hat for fun” hahaha and then Ashton was like “is that cheddar?” and then they ended up randomly talking about cheese lol  

Q: what song took the longest to write and perfect?  Ash joked that they haven’t perfected anything yet and they’re still working on it lol. Michael said Permanent Vacation and talked about writing it with Feldy and the Madden Brothers. Luke also said Airplanes was a tough one as far as the sound.  

• Q: favorite places to eat in Chicago? Luke said something about breakfast hash and they were trying to remember some place called the goat or something but they couldn’t remember what it was called lol. Michael went on a tangent about deep dish pizza for like 10 minutes lmao. He told a story about how last year when they were in Chicago they went out with friends and he had never eaten deep dish pizza before and he’s the type of person that will eat an entire pizza so he was like “yes one deep dish pizza for me please” 😂 and then everyone else did the same thing for some reason and before they knew it they had a whole table of pizza hahaha. He said he immediately regretted it because after one piece he felt sick but it’s the best pizza he’s ever had. 

• Ashton randomly asked if anyone’s ever eaten cheese before bed because if you do you’ll have the “craziest fucking nightmares” ever so he said we should test it out sometime by eating a whole cheese wheel before bed lmao 

• There was a girl there from Australia and after her question they said it was nice to hear the familiar accent because they miss it 

Q: the day they recorded the Teenage Dirtbag cover they said they actually recorded two songs that day, what was the other song? Michael said that was like 5 years ago and they couldn’t remember. Ashton said it was probably Justin Bieber or something lol 

• Q: do they ever miss the intimacy of playing small venues and being able to interact with the crowd more? they talked about this one for a long time. They said they prefer bigger venues and amphitheaters. They said they feel that they actually interact more with the crowd now at these bigger venues. Ashton said it’s basically a different way of performing because they’re working to make sure every single person feels close to them. Ashton and Luke said it would actually be really awkward to go back to playing like a 200 cap venue after being so used to playing big venues. They said it’s also become a safety thing now because they can’t imagine playing at a 200 cap venue because there would be people everywhere trying to get in and in the streets and stuff and they have to make sure no one gets hurt because people do get seriously hurt at concerts. Ash said the second someone gets too hurt is the second they have to stop playing for us so they’re just looking out for us. Then the girl asked if they remember security having to tell everyone to back up and Luke said he remembers one time in between songs they were telling him in his in-ears to ask everyone to move back and he was like “no I’m not gonna do that, that’s awkward as fuck” lmao. 

 • Michael randomly went on a rant about accents lol. He said he was just sitting there thinking while Ashton was talking and he was like “I’m just trying to imagine it from your perspective liking a band from Australia.” and then he was like “idk I just think it’d be so weird, like has anyone ever actually heard an Australian accent in real life?” 😂 They said they’re in America so much that they don’t even notice our accents anymore, it’s normal for them. 

 • Q: what song they would add to the setlist if they could? Someone yelled “Unpredictable” and Luke was mocking us and Ashton was like “hey don’t mock them!” lol then Luke literally said “that song sucks!” and basically that they’re never gonna play it 😂 

 • Luke said he’d pick songs like If You Don’t Know and Beside You. They said coming up with the setlist was hard because a lot of the songs on SGFG like Waste The Night, Vapor, JBH, Outer Space are slower songs that they think are meaningful and important to the set but adding more slow songs would make it drag on. 

 • Michael said during soundcheck they try to play songs that aren’t normally on the setlist to make it a special experience because they know everyone at soundcheck are the huge fans who know all their songs whereas the random dudes in the lawn at the show will only know She Looks So Perfect lol 

 • Ashton also said he misses Kiss Me Kiss Me and Luke said Out of My Limit, they also miss playing American Idiot and they joked around about Don’t Stop lol. Ashton said to this day his moms favorite song is still Gotta Get Out. 

• There was a girl there from Texas and Ashton goes “is this like close to you?” And she was like “ummm no” 😂 and her name was Faith and Michael said Faith and Hope are two of his favorite names. 

Q: what’s their favorite place; not like a city or a country necessarily but just a specific place where they just felt a connection with and feel at peace. Ashton said a place in New Zealand called Queenstown(?) is his favorite place in the world. He said he loves southern New Zealand because it’s so prehistoric and untouched by humans and it’s all nature and it’s beautiful. Michael said his favorite place is home :) he said there’s something magical about leaving and touring and being gone for such a long time and then being able to go home and be back in the suburbs where he grew up and be reminded of where he came from. HES SO CUTE. Ashton said when he’s home he likes to go back and listen to their old music because he can listen to it in a different way now and hear the story of where they’ve been and where they’re going and he can hear it more clearly now. they also said they loved their trip to Bali. 

• There were 3 girls and a dad dressed up as the 5SOS in the Don’t Stop video. The dad was dressed up as Ashton and his name was Dean and Michael loved him. He was like “wait why is the dad Ashton!?” 😂 and said his shirt should say daddy LMAO I died. Michael was like “hey can you hand the microphone to Dean?” And he goes “what do you want to know?” 😂 They asked him about Wisconsin (that’s where they were from) and how far away it is. Then Dean said Sydney and Melbourne are two of the popular places to go in Australia and asked what the third would be and Ashton said Adelaide because it’s more of a small town and not so much of a city. 

Q: what would the theme song to their lives be? They said the Friends theme song and Life Is A Highway and started singing it lol 

• A girl asked for advice about drumming at her first gig and Luke started joking around and was like “I have some great advice for this” and then he said “well you just gotta hit them really hard” lmao then Michael turned it over to Ashton and Ashton said it depends where she’s playing because if you go up there and drum like him and look all “80s as fuck” in front of a crowd of like 4 people you’ll look ridiculous haha. Michael said you just have to make good faces because that’s the key to drumming on stage and then him and Luke started mocking Ashton’s drumming faces 😂 Ashton basically said you just gotta go beast mode lol 

• Someone asked about their favorite music festivals and they talked about going to Lolla yesterday. Luke said he loved G-Eazy and J Cole. Michael said that was his first time going to something like that and like no one was wearing clothes so that was the first thing he noticed and Ashton was like “THAT WAS AWESOME” lmao and then Michael said G-Eazy’s set was ridiculous. Calum was like “yeah I was like oh G-Eazy is a cool name, and then I realized that’s his name because his real name is actually Gerald." 

• They got on the topic of white pants and Michael said a few years ago they were at a party and a guy walked in with white pants on and Ashton was like "never trust a guy in white pants” so Michael has lived by that rule ever since lmao. Luke said he would like to try to wear white pants sometime on stage and Michael was like “no you don’t! our thing is black skinny jeans.” And Ashton was like “yeah, stick to the marketing plan." 

• Ashton said his favorite music festival was Soundwave when he was younger because he was an emo kid and saw bands like Iron Maiden and Mayday Parade and he said it "fulfilled his emo dreams.” He talked about how he didn’t have tickets so he jumped the fence to get in and Luke was like “wow you’re so cool, we should hang out sometime.” lmao 

Q: what song of theirs is their favorite as far as the meaning behind it? they said Carry On. They talked about recording it at the beach and in a hotel room with Feldy and they loved it because most of the time they’re stuck in the studio trying to write. They talked about how insane it was that they made SGFG in only 10 weeks and had to take all of their experiences from all the places they’ve been and things they’ve done and try to get together with some of their friends in the studio to help write and produce the album in such a short amount of time. But they said they’re very proud of how it came out and they hope we love it. 

• At the end they said they had two options and let us vote by screaming so they let us pick between Catch Fire and If You Don’t Know and people screamed louder for IYDK so that’s what they played. :)

clockworkclegga  asked:

So I have been following you for several months know and even though I'm not a part of any of your listed fandoms, I thoroughly enjoy reading through your posts. I was wondering how you met your husband. I heard "online" but I'm just curious as to what the whole story is. Thank you for being hilarious! :D

Thank you for laughing at my inane rambling :D

And yes, husband and I did meet online, over a decade ago in fact. Brace yourselves, this is likely not as romantic as you’re thinking.

We were both part of a sci-fi fantasy writing forum called Elfwood (Lord of the Rings was everyone’s jam, elves were in vogue) and I was using it to post creative fictional works, as well as rambling on about paganism and all sorts of other stuff. Mostly elves, probably. And courtship theories about dwarfs. Anyway.

Husband was one of my first readers, used to leave comments on things I wrote, and soon we started private messaging and became friends. I was in bad emotional place at the time. Things were a disaster at home, two of my best friends had died within six months of each other, and I was dating an abusive asshole who was also on the website. He liked to “check up on me”, you see, and as I later found out, would delete messages from certain people and call my writing pointless and useless. (I dunno if @ahzuri remembers him or not, but she’s also been with me since forever and was one of my lifelines at the time and I’m forever thankful for that <3)

So while I was dating Asshole, future-husband-to-be sort of filled in the void where emotional stability and support ought to be. Something which I was also doing for him too, because as it would turn out his own life was a bit of a mess and we just needed someone to be kind.

It was nice to wake up to messages every day that said “hope you have a great day!” It was nice to go to fall sleep watching the text bubble icon on Windows Messenger (yes, yes, I’m old) still fading over the screen, waking up at 3am to go to the bathroom and seeing the words “oh u fell asleep lol, good night xxx” waiting for you. It made me feel…like not wanting to hurt myself. Which was where I was in my world at the time. I was really, very deeply unhappy, and he saw that and did his best to help. He still does, every day. So never underestimate the simplicity of kindness of strangers, ever. Without it I might not be here typing this.

I still remember the first time we had a webcam chat and I felt my stomach drop away in the realization of “oh no he’s hot”, and tried valiantly to stop staring at his hands or the crook of his smile. And the man talks a lot with his hands and smiles a lot, so it wasn’t easy. I was still very much firmly in denial that I had feelings for him because nope nope nope, that just wouldn’t do. Besides, I was still dating Asshole and as much as I was desperately unhappy, I was just as equally desperate for his approval and affection and thought maybe if I just tried harder, I might deserve it.

Except things just kept getting worse and I latched onto the one positive thing I had which was the funny American sending me vaguely flirty but mostly benign friendly messages from over 4000 miles away, and who was always telling me I was smart and funny and he loved what I had written that day and how he always looked forward to talking to me. And then there was my actual boyfriend— who in hindsight, I am pretty certain was a bonafide sociopath— who got off on hurting me and made me feel like I deserved it. And he hated that I was talking to husband-to-be, hated. It actually resulted in an argument where he told me I was lucky he could bring himself to have sex with me because I was so fat and ugly and no other man could ever want me because how could they, I mean just look at me who would ever want that…and that’s when something white hot snapped inside me and I thought “fuck it, I have nothing to lose, I bet John would appreciate a picture of my tits.”

…Anyway, that went on for a while and I eventually found the emotional strength to break up with Dickbag and moved on with my life. I started going to college, made new friends…and still lived for those little moments when the $1 text message would show up every morning that would say “Good morning gorgeous :)” and still tried to convince myself I had no feelings for him beyond enjoying his attention and our meaningful conversations about love, life and the universe as a whole. We even talked to each other about other partners we had, we were just…the constant in each others variables.

And then my family decided they were going to go on vacation in the USA and we thought, hey great, lets meet up. He needed a date for a wedding, and I needed to not spend three weeks in Florida with my family, lets meet up.

So I’m getting off the airplane and I want to vomit. Like for real, I almost throw up I am so nervous which is ridiculous because I am meeting my friend. Sure I was only 19 years old and had just flown on my own for the very first time to meet someone who I’d never actually met before, but I had nothing to be nervous about. He was just a friend, who I had been talking to for years. And also sending the occasional picture to…but that was besides the point. And then I entered through the doors at baggage claim, and there’s a lull in foot traffic and of course he has his back to me and I get this overwhelming sense of calm wash over me. But he also has is back to me so I decide to sneak up behind him and surprise him because that’s the kind of person I am, except that didn’t work because he turned and somehow I’m off the ground and we’re hugging and smiling and it takes over a full minute or more before either one of us says anything and when we do it’s this giddy breathless hi/hello…you look, haha, no you go first, no YOU…how was your flight/drive, here let me get your bag/no it’s okay I, well if you insist

I’d like to say it was love at first sight but I’m not that much of a romantic. I mean it was something at first sight because on the drive back to his parents house we didn’t say anything, we just stared at each other, lust-struck and holding hands, which was bad because he was meant to be watching the road and driving, not watching me. But we survived, made it into his parents house, put my suitcase into the guest room, managed about…two minutes of polite conversation in the kitchen? And uhm *cough* yea, did I mention his hands yet?

It was one of the best weeks of my life and I finally knew we had something special. And not just because the final Harry Potter book came out that week and he let me read his copy before he did, but I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t a big part of it.

Flash forward through five years of me finishing college and only being able to see each other once a year and trying to figure out where our relationship was going, he proposed via a treasure hunt and a mug of tea.

A year and a bit later we were married in Scotland with our friends and family around us, and a sizeable chunk of Internet friends who had been following our blatant denial for years, cheering us on from the sidelines.

We had another year of living apart due to immigration, but then I finally moved to the US, we bought a house, I got my green card, we’re talking about getting a puppy, we’re super crazy in love with each other, and he’s still my biggest fan. 

Even if he doesn’t understand hurt/comfort fic (ironic if you ask me) and rolls his eyes at my puns. But then I suppose no one is perfect.

3 times dan made phil’s world a bit better and the one time phil returned the favor

summary: It’s already on the title.

warnings: there are lots of existential crises going on.

words: 1.5k

a/n: I just wanted to get rid of writer’s block.

Keep reading

IS ‘28′ just his jersey #?

This post is VERY near and dear to my heart, I’ve personally been verbally assaulted (lol) for thinking he could have a meaning behind choosing his numbers. I knew he hadn’t always had 28 on his jersey and up until now I didn’t know 100% just how much that number meant until he got it tattooed. So this post will be long; but trust me it’s necessary for my sanity and your enjoyment.

1) 17

17 happens to be the first jersey number Louis wore; rumored to be tied to the infamous ‘17 Black’ tattoo. But I want to dive in here a bit more, because you see it’s not just a number on a tattoo he liked. (I’ll say this multiple times, his tattoos and numbers have meaning.) The match above was on October 23, 2012.

Before ‘Larry’ was forbidden Harry and Louis frequented an English pub called ‘17 Black Inn’ and the facebook page for this place admitted to several fans that the boys had a very special place in their hearts for this establishment. Something went down and Modest had stepped in, we obviously know why but what we will never know because nobody will talk about it.

Such a special place in their hearts that it got tattooed into their skin for life; Louis got the Stag. Harry the name of the pub and in the same font. I’ve had people argue these exact tattoos do not go together. All I can do is just throw this in here, if you don’t see it I’ve got nothing.

2) 1D

A year later he chose ‘1D’ for his jersey for this match on September 9th, 2013. This game was infamous for several reasons, once of which I will not mention because it’s just ill taste. But again, 1D is his band. This one explains itself.

I’m always proud of Louis, but seeing him play soccer is an entirely different level of pride.

3) 28

In February of 2014 Louis arrived with the 28 proudly on his back, ready to play another match. 

But why 28? What’s the meaning behind 28? Let’s find out.

The fandom celebrates every year on September 28th, the “Larryversary’. Do we know 100% they are legally married? No, of course not. Are we merely delusional and speculating what we want to happen? No. Here’s why.

People have argued relentlessly and even laughed that Ed was referencing Harry or Louis. The infamous photo of them seen in suits with El around the corner, this one: 

Is said to be them at an awards show. They argue why the hell would he have El there at his wedding? His own family wasn’t even there. Let’s dissect this. First of all I don’t buy into the whole Louis hates Eleanor thing. I strongly believe they were friends throughout this, they hated parts of their job and towards the end El got tired of it too. Now she tweeted September 29th at 7:43 AM. You keeping notes?

Then we have Anne’s tweet on September 29th in the afternoon.

Louis tweeted he’d lost his voice at 7:16 PM on September 28th. And Ashton from 5SoS tweeted…


Harry tweeted multiple times about getting married to Louis previously and vice versa. tweets about it’s legal in NYC let’s go! This tweet above was tweeted at 4:44 AM on September 29th. All of these tweets are tied together; time frames are right.

Louis loved 28 so much he made his monitor into the number. Not once. TWICE.

So we can all agree by now that Louis has a personal tie to the number 28. Whatever you believe that reason to be; let’s just rest on agreeing it has a significant meaning to him. Enough to get tattood on his body though? Eh….

The answer is yes; it means that much to him. *Cue floating hearts and heart eye emojis*

Not only did he get this number on his body, but he chose his hand. The part of the body everyone will see, all the time. He holds a microphone for hours a day and it will proudly be on display. But it’s on his ring finger, on his marriage hand. The two is on his ring finger, signifying ‘2 people’ forever. The 8 could also signify ‘infinity’ or the date of September 28th. Or his soccer jersey, but we don’t need to go back that far now do we?

Know who else has shown a love for this number? Harry.

Know who is Louis’ other half? Harry.

This isn’t just a number on his soccer jersey people, it carried onto his corden jersey, any other numbered shirt he ever wore, his ear monitor mold, and now a forever tattoo. You can’t argue this anymore, September 28th is sacred. Let him enjoy that. Perhaps it’s the date of Louis proposal to Harry? Maybe it’s the day Louis got down on one knee and asked Harry to be his forever. We may never know.

martinthedragon  asked:

Request: an AU where Attack on Titan is a popular anime/TV show/film series/whatever, the characters are actors and they all go to a con and we see all the cool stuff they do. Panels, Q&A sessions, autograph sessions, hanging with cosplayers, the whole shebang.

I don’t know what happened but this is 4.5k long, like what is my life. Because it got so long I just stuck with the Q&A panel. A lot of it is dialogue though since it takes place at a panel (which in my five years of conning I’ve never been to a Q&A panel lol). I combined these requests too since they were pretty similar topic matter ^^ A special thanks to @ask-eren-plush​ and @mcpeterism​ who helped me with the questions for the audience to ask!

Eren remembered being asked once if he knew what he was getting into accepting the role he did. His answer was simply, as an actor you take what’s offered and be thankful you can eat that week. It was meant to make the audience laugh but it was also the truth. When he was offered the lead in a high action movie he accepted the role with more than a little enthusiasm. He had absolutely no idea six years later he’d be done with three movies, and be the face of a huge franchise.

Okay, that part was still a little intimidating.

He stood off to the side of the stage, listening to his director talk about the series to a room packed with people. Eren tried to ignore the nerves bundled in his stomach, his hands fidgeting with his shirt. This wasn’t the first time he was a part of a panel at a con, he’d done it with is costars countless times. Hell, this wasn’t even the first time he was a part of a panel at Comic Con, but no matter what he always felt nervous before speaking to the people who loved the series as much as he did.

Keep reading

thetrinityoflunacy  asked:

So, was I the only one confused about the whole Jenkins x Cassandra thing going on in this latest episode? It wasn't only because it WASNT Jassandra. It was just weird and really unexpected. Like, I always think of Jenkins as the helpful grandpa. The love-arc that I fear they're going to take has made me a bit uncomfortable. Am I leaning too much on prejudice?

Hi there! 

You were not the only one confused. Though, I think it was intended to feel rather unexpected (as evidenced by Jenkins himself nearly destroying his tea set, lol). Yes, he and Cassandra have a special connection and we all knew it but I think a lot of us assumed that it was very doting uncle/loving niece. 

But just because a lot of assumed that was the nature of their relationship doesn’t mean Cassandra didn’t have a crush on him. (As someone who is in love with both Jenkins and John Larroquette myself I can tell you he is worthy of a crush haha.) I wouldn’t say you’re leaning too much on prejudice either because his relationship with everyone else on the show is very much helpful caretaker/grandfather/uncle. It would seem natural to extend that to Cassandra as well. At least, from Jenkins’s point of view. 

I would like to point out though, that Jenkins let her down gently. Jenkins is a Knight of the Round Table. Chivalry is very important to him and part of that is making promises of loyalty and love to one woman. He explained that he already promised his eternity to another woman and that is an oath he is not willing to break. Yes, he did say he loved Cassandra but, after letting her down so easily, I do not feel it was intended as romantic love. Jenkins himself told Cassandra that he was not the love she was looking for. Jenkins is not the kind of man to say something he doesn’t mean. He is, after all, the Incorruptible Knight.

That’s not to say I’m definitely right in my opinions or that future episodes won’t touch back on this at some point. But it seemed to me, that Jenkins was someone Cassandra greatly respected and cared for and she reached out to him in her time of need for comfort. 

She wasn’t willing to tell him why, exactly. But combine his immortal life with her crush and how much she respects him and how unique he is in her world and I think the fact that she reached out to him does make sense. Lindy herself has said in interviews that Cassandra wasn’t so much reaching out for a lover as she was for comfort and for someone who had something she didn’t…immortal life. 

I also think that for Cassandra, who was in a very vulnerable and scary place, it was a door she had to open. She had this crush and she had to know what would happen before her tumor finally took her away from the life she’d fought to make for herself. She needed to know what he would say and not wonder about it any more. Now she knows what his answer would have been and can maybe find closure in that. 

Thanks for stopping by the ask! I hope some of this was helpful or comforting to you!

Logan (aka Summer-Smells)

Seventeen: Cute Things Vocal Unit Would Do For A Date

Last unit left, 3/3 woohoo

Woozi: Although cuddly Jihoon is not one to show outward affection very easily, I think because he would have so much care for you within he’d want to make you happy and take you out even if he’d probably prefer to stay at home. To me he seems like the type to spoil his partner, so I think he’d take you on a day of splurge. He’d take you out to the mall and insist that you buy whatever you wanted. Although you’d resist at first and tell him he didn’t need to spend his money on you, he’d be dead set on his original plan and would begin buying random things he knew you’d like. Eventually you gave in and picked out a minuscule amount of things, just so he’d stop aimlessly buying you all these things you felt weren’t necessary to make you happy. Finally he’d end the day with buying you a bouquet of flowers and you’d happily accept it while leaning in to give him a kiss. He’d awkwardly stand there and return the kiss, and you’d pull away while saying, “There, that’s all I wanted from the start.” (The killer Woozi smile would follow suit yum

Joshua (The One and Holy): Jisoos would love to do very romantic things for his s/o, I feel like he’d be the type to do it often. He’d like to have constant contact like holding hands, hugging etc. He would want to feel like he was taking care of you while making you feel special so he would cook you some homemade dinner. He would make sure you were gone and out of the house while he was preparing the dinner. Joshua would take extra precautions in making sure everything is perfect and he cooked everything to perfection. He researched recipes that he hoped you would like days before and was currently setting the table with a silk table cloth. You walked in to a beautiful scene of a candle lit room, red rose petals splayed out all over the table and a feast of foods you loved. Joshua smiled shyly and pulled out your chair and gave you a peck on the forehead. He took a seat as well and you guys proceeded to start eating (can i have this in my life right now tho?

Jeonghan: Han and his hair would do something hands on. Something that would bond the two of you together, he’d want you to be comfortable with him. So I think he’d take you on a date, but the special part would be him getting you dolled up for the date. He’d insist that you let him do your hair and makeup and would eventually convince you, although you were a bit hesitant at first.  He was gentle with every movement he made, he softly ran your comb through your hair and effectively removed all the tangles in it. (haha not me these tangles ain’t going nowhere) He then took a curling rod and made some loose curls out of your previously straight hair. While doing your makeup he would plant sweet kisses to places like your jaw line and forehead. He repeatedly gushed about how beautiful you were and how you looked pretty with or without makeup. Finally he finished the look and you glanced at yourself in the mirror. Jeonghan didn’t do too shabby! (lol shabby) Yeah there were a few smudges and clumped lashes here and there, but the shinning look of pride and admiration on his face was the real finishing touch.

Seungkwan: lil’ diva boo would want to take his miss diva boo out on a fun date. Lots of playing around and messing with you, maybe pranking you from time to time. You two had been out taking a walk around a park’s pathway. Seungkwan was being his old extra self, every 10 steps he’d stop and complain that the pathway was too long. He had even taken his water bottle and poured half of the water inside all over himself. (ugh Seungkwan wyd) However you begin to grow concerned after a race which he had actually challenged you to. Seungkwan was breathing heavily while wheezing, knees slowly bending to bring his whole body closer to the ground. Eventually Seungkwan was fully laid out on the ground, causing your heart to drop from fear. You descend down to his level and stroked his cheek, “Kwanie are you okay?” He laughed while shooting you a quick wink, “ You always know how to get my heart racing jagiya.”

Seokmin: Aegyo king would thrive at making you feel like you’re the only girl in the world. He’d take endless pictures of you and wouldn’t be able to close his mouth when someone asks him about you. You were at the beach with DK, making a sandcastle when you heard faint clicks. You turned to him and found him holding a camera in his hands, and a bright signature DK smile on his face (his smile is brighter than my future no lie) “Sorry for taking pictures, you just look so pretty today jagi.” He explained and you smiled for the camera once before returning to your castle. Suddenly you feel a pair of arms around you. You felt Seokmin’s face mashing into yours and then finally notice the camera that was waving in front of your face. “Just on selca,” he says while snapping multiple pictures. You giggle and plant a kiss on his cheek, he snaps the picture just when you do so. “This one is very cute babe, just like you!” he gushed as he showed you the picture. “Nope, it’s cute just like you.” you state while giving him another peck on the cheek.


Finished all the units yes ma’am. Someone mail me a Joshua Hong please and thank you ^.^

anonymous asked:

Lyssa senpai my poor heart needs some carla-mikasa interaction, like "mom, mikasa is MY girlfriend can I have some of her attention too?

Omg. They would fight over who got to spend time with Mikasa so much (Carla would always win cause she’s Carla lol). This was so cute though, I love Carla and Mikasa having that mother/daughter relationship ;-; Also I’m not sure if you wanted this to be a holiday fic but I made it one haha

Carla loved her son, she did. Her and Grisha tried and tried to have a baby for so long so when the nurse first placed Eren in her arms she was more than in love with that little boy, even as he grew up into the hyper, loud mouthed troublemaker he could be. She loved every bit of his rambunctious side, and every bit of his big hearted, compassionate side. Yet there was nothing that could compare to having a daughter to spend the day with, to take out to lunch, to go shopping in more stores than almost any man would go into.

“I think I’m just gonna get Levi this,” Mikasa said, holding up a brightly colored tie that didn’t match that man’s personality or look at all.

Carla folded the sweater she had been looking at back on the pile. “It would go with his eyes, dear.”

Mikasa laughed and placed the tie back, shifting some of the bags from previous stores on her arms. “He’s impossible to shop for. I always just end up getting him a gift card to somewhere.”

Okay, technically, Mikasa wasn’t Carla’s daughter. Mikasa wasn’t even related but Carla had known Mikasa since she was a little girl sleeping in the guest room for a few weeks before her brother came to get her. She was a daughter to Carla long before her son finally got his head out of his ass and asked the pretty girl he knew for six years out.

Keep reading