my-mask

Japanese x Hungarian/Irish

So happy there is a day for this, it took a long time for me to get to a place where I fully love and accept myself. Part of that self-love comes from connections with other asian/mixed women and women of color. I’ve spent my whole life being disconnected from them. I never had any japanese friends. I started to lose the ability to speak the language as I got older and became more aware with how un-cool it was to be asian. I used to think that in order to feel belonging I had to assimilate to whiteness by masking my Japanese side and push away other asians. Or by drawing a distinction between Japanese and other asians, making sure classmates knew that I wasn’t like the other asians, “Japan is cool, it’s where Sailor Moon comes from!”. I didn’t realize my mom spoke with an accent until I had a slumber party in middle school. We were going to Six Flags Magic Mountain the next morning and we were up late, my mom came in and said “sleep now or no mountain”. Repeating that quote like it was a wise ancient proverb, became my friends’ favorite “inside joke”, and though I laughed along with everyone I felt really alone and hurt and confused. It is difficult not to internalize racism but in order to achieve self-love I had to do a lot of un-learning. Every time I see a young mixed girl my eyes get teary and I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because they remind me of myself, and how sad and lonely I felt then, pushing and pulling between two cultural identities. But also because I get overwhelmed with pride over how brave and resilient girls are and how I wish I was aware of my strength and insight when I was growing up.

8

OMG OKAY IM STILL HYPER FROM A LITTLE EARLIER. But, here’s some more art!

Top left is a character creation race thing I did for the hell of it.

Top right is of Vyse from Skies of Arcadia and he’s crossdressing because of a dream I had.

For those who don’t know, I’m making a game and this is an example of the faces I will be using in it! One of the people in it will actually join your party!

I brought back three of my characters who are all dolls. The little one is based on a doll I actually own.

Next is my character, Dymnpa. I made a boyfriend for her, named Issac. The thing behind Dymnpa is called The Figure. She has schizophrenia, inspired by Dapper-Deoxys getting it.

The one with the skull mask is my character Konfoto, aka Comfort, who is a troubled spirit after she was wrongfully claimed to be some evil thing which forced her to go into hiding where she later died of starvation.

Last one is crack drawings that I did in another one of Deo’s streams.

As a tribute to Rowdy Roddy Piper I’ve been wearing my They Live mask all day. It hasn’t been easy. Especially when it came time to eat lunch.

  So, do you guys remember that book that Mac Antfee had that looked like it was designed after the Nomicon and all that junk in NinjaCamp. Ha … me neither.

And I most certainly didn’t spend too many hours reading Enter the Nomicon before I saw a still of Mac’s book and thought, hey, what if Nomi had a book bro. What if this book was human too. Oh, god, I am literal trash.

So basically Mac Antfee, pissed at Randy and all of that, comes to the conclusion that “if I had a magical book like that loser, I could totally take him down.” He already had the perfect thing; the book he’d been writing in for years detailing how to fight dirty, how Mac Antfee was the one who deserved the ninja mask. Enter the Sorceress. One way or another, bad guys who want to take down a hero seem to meet up, and this was no exception. 

The sorceress’s own special brand of magic is what keeps the book (dubbed Naoko) living. She gains influence from both Mac Antfee and the sorceress. Sarcastic, vain, and rude; she will do anything to win, and often takes cue from the sorceress and will throw off people in the battle with … seduction tactics.

She’s not the best fighter in the world, most of her techniques coming from the underhanded things she inherited from Mac, but she is fairly decent at using a staff and a sword and exceptionally good at magic. Naoko is the perfect weapon, completely loyal to her creators and holding Mac Antfee in the highest of opinions. There was nothing to fault with their plan.

Until the book started developing her own traits, gaining human emotions and even worse–forming her own thoughts.

Thanks to daimix/nomiconn for helping me with the babe and doing the art uwu