Illegally evict my company out of the rented office space? I'm going to make you sparkle!

“Go insane, go insane, throw some glitter, make it rain!”

All names have been changed to protect the guilty as sin.

So this happened to my cousin. He works for a small startup media company (SMC) in a semi large city. This media company leases out space in an office building for offices, studios, and production rooms with a small detached storage shed just off the parking lot.  

A few weeks ago, the building owner sends a letter stating that SMC must leave the building within the next three days. Due to the recent hurricanes, another larger media company (VIP, you know them) got flooded out of their building and needed to use the studio to get back on line. Apparently, the building owner was double renting the space as a backup site for multiple different production companies (pretty illegal) and needed to perform an eviction (very illegal) to get them back on the air.

So SMC looks at their lease, sees that there is no clause for a speedy exit in it, tells the building owner that it’s not happening, and then hires a night time security guard just in-case building owner tries something shady. That night, the security guard is doing his rounds and the building owner shows up demanding to know who he is and why he is there. Guard states that he’s been hired to secure the site and that no one is allowed in after hours. The building owner gets into a huff, drives away, and then promptly calls the police about a trespasser in their property!

What they didn’t know, was that this security guard was an active Police Detective with that precinct. Cops showed up, talked to the Detective, and then promptly told the owner to, “Fuck off with that shit.” ….and then drove away.

Building owner did not take this well. When the guard left the office to go use the bathroom, the building owner snuck in, locked the doors, and revoked passkey access to everyone in SMC, including the guard watching the space. SMC promptly calls their lawyers to start emergency legal proceedings against the building owner to force them to re-open access to the space and abide by the terms of the lease agreement.

Here comes the twist. Building owner is a prominent business official, a “Pillar of the Community,” multi-millionaire rich as fuck with friends in high places, and a total disregard to anyone not on their level. Legal team shows up at the court, is given the run around for hours by court officials, until being told by the judge that they will not be allowed to file their suit due to multiple bullshit reasons. A “settlement offer” is put forward to refund the last month’s rent, exit the lease, and be given access to the space to clear out the equipment. Total bullshit offer, but what’s a small company to do? So, the space is emptied, gear removed, and a rush job construction buildout is being done in a nearby warehouse to get back to production.

Here comes the revenge! My cousin purchased 35 pounds of ultra-fine colored glitter as a going away present. And that shit was spread like herpes in a whorehouse! Sprayed into the vents, poured onto the fan blades, in the refrigerator, IN THE GODDAMNED ICEMAKER!  One guy brought an electric leaf blower to make sure it got into spaces with no access. It was put on top of attic access hatches so it would coat anyone who opened the door. This place looked like Pride Parade central booking!

If you watch any cable TV over the next few weeks, watch out for some of the people looking a little bit too sparkly.

anonymous asked:

I don't know how exactly I should send this in but I have a mini receipt, I say mini because I don't know how big of a deal it was, but my cousin works with organizing at the Aria's, and the boys were there for the 2014 Aria's. Her job is basically to help celebrities to backstage and into stage- basically get them where they need to be and when. Anyways at one point she was with the boys and she was gathering them up but Harry was missing. She said the boys were calling him out and +

+ Louis was saying “Hazza?” but he was nowhere to be found - only to see him come back with a piece of cake for him and Louis. I don’t even know why this is a receipt. It’s not even anything big really. He literally just got himself and Louis some cake. Anyways, that’s all :)

anonymous asked:

This is more of a f- co workers but I don’t work all day at my job because I’m still in high school and my co worker goes “When Tyler (my cousin) worked here he worked all day on Saturday and he was still in school.” I told her good for him. What she probably doesn’t realize is that he was home schooled. She pisses me off so much. I probably hurt her feelings but at this point I don’t care.

The Montréal Girl | Tom Holland

Summary: While filming for Chaos Walking, Tom Holland has to take lessons on horse back riding. A Montréal girl (who lives on the ranch) teaches him all she knows, giving him daily lessons on the art of horse back riding. Their friendship begins to blossom into something a little more, and the two find themselves falling in love with one another…

Warning: light fluff

Pairing: Tom Holland x reader

Type: Oneshot

Requested: anonymously


The Montréal farm grew up out of the pale green hills as if it had always been part of the scenery. The hills were a safe place to play, to explore, to create new stories and live dreams to the fullest.

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nateisbritish  asked:

So, I really want to start working out again, I used to work out all the time in high school. But I just don't have the motivation anymore. I don't have a lot of friends to work out with and my cousin who wants to work out with me wants me to get a gym membership, but i don't make enough money for that. How do I get motivated? I work and go to school and by the time I get home, I'm exhausted. Please help.

Okay @nateisbritish Motivation is Fleeting and unreliable the majority of the time and it comes in spirts. You need to focus on building
Discipline and CONSISTENCY.

Now think about why you personally want your fitness goals. Literally write them down. Also I want you to remember this, once you begin to quit, it becomes easier and easier to keep quitting.

Now I apologize in advance for a lil bit of language but its how my friend really got the memo through to me and how I stopped being so soft in areas of my life that need me to be strong, So I’ll pass it on.

When you quit, It becomes a habit, becoming a BITCH is habit forming (and thats not the derogatory term for women im using.)

Let me give you an example,

You say

i want to workout“ but you spend all night awake so you sleep in and skip your morning workout, then you push it till noon, then push it till the evening and then you bitch out on it.

Then you start bitching out on other things like “I could eat this clean healthy meal from all the health food I have at home But these brownies and cake look tasty so ill wait till tomorrow.”

So this is how my Good friend got the point across to me. Last year or was it early this year I was being really wimpy and whiny about something and my buddy had enough of it and said “Jordan stop being a little bitch” and I was so sensitive at the time I was like “why would you even call me that when i-” and my friend then STRAIGHT Decked me in the face like fuckin Kamina 

and knocked me down and said these words that I’ve never forgotten 

“Jordan WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO YOU, You’re letting yourself get so fuckin soft. You’re actin like this one thing DID that much. thats not the badass I used to know, you’re becoming pathetic and I as your Good friend will not allow it. You’re stronger than you fuckin know and if you ever let yourself think about bein a weak little bitch again I’ll slug ya because I love you Bro and I know you’re better than that” 

and that really just helped me realize yeah wow i was becoming a wimpy whiner about a lot of things and that wasnt going to help me with anything. It was the TOUGH LOVE WAKEUP CALL I NEEDED. Its GOOD to have friends call you on your shit haha so I always thank him for that

I try not to quit anything anymore. I literally bitched out on getting my shoulder healed because i was lazy and bitched out on workouts till I looked in the mirror and straight called myself out on it and fixed it. then you keep building bitch habits you will bitch out on big areas of your life. Dont Do that, The times you dont wanna workout or say you cant, Is bullshit because a 1 hour workout is 4% of your day.You have time and those are times you must not quit. Build strong habits that build integrity, and self confidence and MOST Importantly Stay Consistent and Stay disciplined. Will power is like any other muscle it has to be trained

if you keep forming bitch habits then thats what you will be. Sorry for the swearin but Honestly I’ved found tough love is the best one that will get you back on track. Now don’t go find your Motivation find how you can stay disciplined and consistent whatever it is, and Don’t quit it, Don’t bitch out and you can overcome anything life puts in your way.

Southern Names: Folks From My Town Edition

Here’s a few more names for your inspiration. These are inspired by actual people, living or deceased, in my town.

Boone: a nickname for my cousin Daniel who works in construction in a town more than half an hour away.

Bertram: My grandfather, a cattle farmer’s, name. 

Annette: My grandmother, has extremely thick and long hair. 

Pinky: A nickname for my great-aunt Mary, because there are too many people with that name.

Libby:  A woman in her 90s that goes to church with my grandmother and always sends cards out on the holidays.

Carlton: Libby’s husband, also in his 90s, never in a bad mood. 

Laverne: A woman in her 70s who keeps her hair dyed bright red. 

Aleta: The woman who runs a hair salon out of her house, but not legally.

Brandi: A trashy young mother of three who cheats on her husband when he’s deployed by the military, and everyone knows about it except him.

Deborah: My step-aunt, runs an impromptu child care center for almost every family in town. 

Janna: Resident young-adult meth head, has wrecked two cars in 6 months. 

Tammy: The most horrible woman you will ever meet, plays organ for the church.

Twyla (Twylita): A bit intimidating but secretly very kind, leads the church choir and volunteers for the high school marching band. 

Connie and Kaye: Twins who look nothing alike, but all of their kids look alike. 

Harrison: The redheaded twenty something that almost every girl had a crush on in their childhood. 

Presley: Harrison’s younger brother, literally might be the devil.

Jedd: A young man who used to work for my grandfather when he was a teenager.

Lonnie: My great-grandfathers name. 

Verse: Pronounced “Ver-see”, my great-grandmother, Lonnie’s wife. 

getthesamovarready  asked:

So in my friend's Irish class the teacher(who is my cousin) is doing oral work with them and asks what they did over the weekend Student: chonaic me an telefis. Teacher: cad a feacain tu ar an telefis Student: chonaic me... Teacher: Stephen I don't care if you were watching porn just get the verb right


The Fitting (Part 9)

(Jungkook’s jealous and acting out.)

Warnings:  99.9% angst, 0.1% fluff, 0% actual smut.  We do have implied smut and sex related angst.

2:15pm  We should talk about this.

2:16pm  I can explain.

2:23pm  It’s not what you think it is.

2:25pm  I’m only meeting him because I promised my cousin.

2:33pm  I’m not dating him. It’s a one-time thing.

2:40pm  If you would give me a chance to explain, you would see it’s not a big deal.

2:44pm  You are over-reacting.

2:46pm  Why aren’t you responding?

2:51pm  I only agreed to the date to keep up appearances. It’s not that serious.

3:01pm  Will you please just call me or text me or something?

You had been texting Jungkook for the past 45 minutes but got no reply.  The irony that you were now the one staring at your phone waiting for a response was not lost on you.  He would be leaving to go to the concert hall for sound check and rehearsal in a few minutes, so you gave up hope that he would contact you to talk about this anytime soon. 

Telling Jungkook right away about the date you had planned would have been the right thing to do, but it never occurred to you.  When you made the date with the other guy, you and Jungkook had only been together for a couple days.  At the time, you had no idea that things would escalate so quickly.  Besides, you thought, this shouldn’t even be that big of a deal. 

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anonymous asked:

Fuck (other people's) coworkers. My boyfriend and his cousin work at McFuckface and she was due off at 1am, so me and him were giving her a ride home. She was still cleaning at 3am even with me and him helping her as one of the wankstains she works with spilled an entire squeezy-bottle-thing of ranch on the floor, tried mopping it, spread it around, then fucked off home and left us three to it! My boyfriend wasn't even on the clock and I don't even work there!

Send me an address and I will spray ranch into the fucker’s ears and nose while they sleep for a full year. Don’t close your eyes, ranch never sleeps. -Abby

Desire {Flowershop! Renjun}
  • Pairing: Renjun X Reader
  • Request: “could you please do a flowershop au for renjun??”
  • Genre: Fluff; Flowershop! AU; Bulleted Scenario
  • Word Count: 590
  • Summary: After your favorite flower shop closes, you find a new one and meet someone special while you’re at it.

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Ten Years (Part 2)

Summary: AU. When a major account is on the line at work, reader is forced to revisit some old connections at her ten year high school reunion for a chance at success. Will she let the past consume her, or will she see the future in her grasp?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 2,367

Warnings: language, snark, memories of cheaters

A/N: I usually like to have Nat be the schemer, but I’m liking Wanda as this bleeding heart hopeless romantic here. I hope you do, too!

Part: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8

Originally posted by heartsandwheels

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me and my cousins started working to help a family business in middle school. I spent a lot of ‘vacation’ just unloading trucks and organizing stuff. my family puts heavy emphasis on work ethic and considers going to work instead of holiday celebrations a good thing.

there are no socialists in my family, there’s a few moderate liberals among lots of right libs and that’s it.

so honestly I wish people would stop fucking acting like everyone who dislikes capitalism has never worked or has a family of leftists.

even lots of people who support capitalism hate capitalism, they just consider it superior to alternatives.

my stepdad’s boss exploited him and he was working 24/7 doing jobs he wasn’t even hired for, and he said yeah that’s exploitation under capitalism, but he’s free because he can find a better job (at his new one the same thing is happening…) you don’t have to be a socialist to know elements of capitalism suck.

that’s the mood of tonight. here’s a picture of my cat ivy after she fell behind the couch:

4.6.17// rainy day and intensive study session, at the Grimm-Zentrum. Also a day of unexpected meetings: I met an old friend of my cousin. She is working as an au-pair girl in Berlin and doing her application for my same master.
I had a lot of work done yesterday, so I´m quite satisfied. Hope I can finish the book on feminist literary critic tomorrow and work on the topic for my paper.   

anonymous asked:

Work at hellsrus and now we're getting written up if we don't sell any instant credits or warranties or rewards cards 🙃 so basically everyone's getting written up because only two people can frequently get them

My cousin works there and was written up because a customer saw 2 workers, None of which were my cousin, smoking on their break and complained and she just got written up again because someone literally smashed through the back of the store with a sledge hammer to create a hole and stole all the gaming systems and she lives an hour from the store and didn’t get there in time to stop him. So, I feel their write up policies are straight up bull fuckery. -Mandie

“Found an old digital camera in my basement today and fired it up for the first time in 5 years. Found this photo. Before Impractical Jokers ever premiered Tru TV paid to have these ads posted all over Manhattan. Some friends and I went out and took pictures and did a shot every time we found one. We got very drunk that day as Tru put a lot into advertising that first season.
I know this was on the corner of Great Jones Street in Manhattan, because my cousin and some friends worked in the firehouse there and they were so happy for me. Also made fun of me a lot, which is how firemen (and men in general) express affection and pride.
What I really about this pictures the fact that I’m wearing boot-cut jeans. Boot-cut jeans are the manliest of jeans.” –Brian “Q” Quinn. Taken from his Facebook.