BTS Scenario/Reaction - Jimin Self Harming/Self Harm Scars (Pt.3)
*TRIGGER WARNING* This is a very touchy topic and if you are uncomfortable with it I suggest you not to read
(DISCLAIMER: I do not intent to promote/romanticise self harming or depression. If you or someone you know is going through this please get help and my ask box is always open if you need/want to talk, both admins are here to listen)
Word count: 969
It had been six months now that you and Jimin were dating and things between you two were becoming more intimate whenever you would go over to his dorm. Although you loved these moments and were ready to go further you couldn’t help but be a bit sceptical and cautious. Your insecurities always kept you from allowing anything more than a heated make out session and yo wished you could just over come them. These insecurities triggered by the scars which you sadly had caused on your thighs resulting from your traumatic pass. Ashamed about the ugly markings on your body, it always refrained you from ever revealing yourself fully to your boyfriend. Seeing the unappealing scars always brought up past memories, memories that you tried so hard to suppress and forget, memories that made you feel like you were worth nothing. Thinking this way only caused you to wonder how your boyfriend would react if he ever saw them. Doubts would cloud your mind about if he would still want to be with someone who had repeatedly themselves because they were in a very dark place in life. Even though Jimin was an accepting and understanding, an overall wonderful boyfriend you could’t help but think these intoxicated questions. Would he still think I’m pretty with all of these scars randomly placed my body?
Exhausted but still being very excited of the idea of seeing your boyfriend, you had just arrived at the dorms after your shift at work due to Jimin texting you to stop by saying he missed you. Receiving cute texts from him always made your worst days better and you couldn’t help but hold back the smile that formed on your face. Reaching the front door, you took a deep breath, preparing yourself knowing that all the boys were going to be home and you knew how much they loved to tease you and Jimin. Turning the knob, the door opened and you couldn’t help but think how these boys were so irresponsible by not even locking the front door. Shaking your head and making your way inside, you greeted Jimin’s friends who had over time became your friends as you made your way to your boyfriend’s room, but not before receiving suggestive looks from the boys. Cheeks burning and probably flushed in a bright red shade you hurried to Jimin’s room to get away from the chuckles and whispers that came from the living room. As soon as you had entered and closed the door behind you, Jimin greeted you with a passionate kiss pressing your body gently into the back of the door. You smiled into the kiss missing the feeling of his plump lips against yours. You pulled back to catch your breath as Jimin muttered “I really missed you y/n”. Not being able to control the feelings you felt as you stared at his flushed face and now swollen lips, you reconnected your mouth with his, this time returning the same amount of passion Jimin was kissing you with. Your hands mindlessly found their way into his soft hair as he slowly lead you both to his bed, lowering you gentle onto it.
You welcomed the soft feeling of the cotton sheets beneath you as you savoured this moment, not wanting to stop. The feeling of Jimin’s body slightly pressed against yours as his lips worked wonders from teasingly pulling your bottom lip to making light open mouthed kisses all the way down to the base of your neck was enough for you to get lost in the moment and temporarily forget about your doubts and worries. Finding the confidence, you returned the favour and mimicked his actions, nipping at his skin with your lips leaving marks randomly scattered on his collarbone. If it wasn’t for the effect Jimin had on you, you would of never gotten this far and would of bailed before you two even got to the bed but you couldn’t resist, he was too tempting.
Things escalated quickly and you being too caught up in the heat of the moment you hadn’t realise that Jimin had skillfully been able to remove your jeans leaving your legs bare with only your panties covering your lower region. Your thoughts were too infatuated by the way Jimin and the way he was making you feel to even realise that his hands had found there way to your jeans and removed them with ease. Even though your mind was telling you how badly you wanted this, your body was saying no. You found yourself tensing up, your actions stopped and you stayed there still not knowing what to expect and feeling extremely insecure. Your once screwed shut eyes were now staring widely at him, the doubts clouded back into your mind as you tried to shyly move your body away from his. Jimin realised your sudden change in mood and halted his actions, a little worried he was being too forward with you. He found your scared eyes and immediately lifted his body away from your slightly trembling one. He didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or unsure about what you both were doing and he respected your decisions but he was still a bit confused. You lowered your head to avoid meeting his gaze any longer and it broke his heart a little to see you like this. He could sense your insecurities and hurt in your eyes as he lifted your chin again, worried about what was going through your mind.
“What’s wrong babe?” he questioned with a look of worry taking over his features. Not being able to form coherent words you just looked away from his intense gaze and down at your scarred thighs, tears starting to form in your eyes. His concerned eyes followed your gaze and saw what was causing you to react this way, your scars. His expression soften and his heart ached at the sight of the multiple lines that were scattered across your soft skin. You felt like curling into a ball and burying yourself in your insecurities and sadness at his reaction, he was just staring and you couldn’t handle the rejection if he didn’t want to be with you anymore, but what he did caught you off guard. You felt the lightest of touches against your thighs where your scars were making tingles run up your spine. You slowly opened your tear filled eyes to see Jimin, with his eyes on your face as he gently kissed each and everyone of the marks as his eyes hold yours, love and adoration filled in them. Your heart leaped at his actions and you couldn’t hold back the tear that was threatening to fall. You were relieved to know that you worried for nothing, all those sleepless night thinking that once Jimin got to see the real you he would run. But you were wrong and you couldn’t be more happy, the man you loved was cherishing each and every inch of your body as if it was the most precious thing in the world. You loved him so much and this meant so much to you, him accepting you for who you are, accepting you and all your faults included. Jimin didn’t care that you would these flaws on your skin’ it was a part of you and he loved everything about you and these markings weren’t going to change that fact. You were perfect in his eyes and he loved you no matter what.
“I love you no matter what y/n, your’e absolutely beautiful even with these scars”