my world is about to explode

someone: haha why are you so obsessed with *insert show/book series/film/etc)

me, internally: because throwing myself into something allows me to briefly forget the constant depression misery and sadness i suffer through every day and when i marathon things my self hatred sometimes starts to disappear because i forget that i’m a real person who exists in the real world. my obsessions help me to cope when i feel like i’m about to explode or cry or scream or all of those at once and once i get into something i barely think of anything else for weeks which is a very unhealthy coping tactic but hey it helps so

me: haha idk :))

100 Dialogue Prompts
  1. “Where the hell did that baby come from, Marissa?!" 
  2. “Did you destroy the world AGAIN?”
  3. "What do you mean you’re a serial killer?”    
  4. “Listen, you can’t just keep shoving people off the sides of cliffs.”
  5. “Oh my god. I thought you were dead.”
  6. “That wasn’t there before”
  7. “So what now?” “I have no idea, I thought that would kill us”
  8. “I can’t believe you’re married to death, again!”
  9. “Assassination would seem to be a better career, with your skillset.”
  10. “It’s not my fault that the snails committed mutiny!”
  11. “It’s situations like this that make me question why I follow you anywhere.”
  12. “Where did this dog come from?”
  13. “Did you remember to take the skin off?”
  14. “I was going to ask what you’re doing, but at this point, I don’t think I want to know.”
  15. “Why is there a corpse in the bathtub?”
  16. “What in tarnation”
  17. “I love you, I’ll make you love me too”
  18. “This would be a lot easier if you sat still.”
  19. “You see, it all began when it spoke back.”
  20. “This is the pit where we keep the cube that screams.”
  21. “Why did you steal my door?”
  22. “Why didn’t you just listen to me…”
  23. “Hey, you finally made it!”
  24. “Wait, there were only three of them. Why are there now four?”
  25. “How do you ‘accidentally’ hit someone hard enough to rip a hole through time and space?”
  26. “Why is there bloodstains on the floor, honey?”
  27. “… Why are you… eating tacos at 3 AM?” “Why not?”
  28. “Why would you train your gerbil army to take over the world and enslave humanity?!”
  29. “Are toasters supposed to float?”
  30. “Honey, did you eat the dog”
  31. “Hey bro, where’s our sister?” “Um… we don’t have a sister.”
  32. “Wanna help me steal a giraffe?”
  33. “I told you that you would regret it, now we’ve ended up like this.”
  34. “Why are your clothes all wet? Why are you covered in glitter? Why does your sister have wings? Ah- get off the carpet! It’s getting all wet!”
  35. “You’re not actually sure, are you?”
  36. “What do you expect me to do? I’m a magician, not a wizard!”
  37. “Dad? What are you doing here? This is a spaceship.”
  38. “Mom says I can’t burn the city hall with you. She said that we’re going to my aunt that day.”
  39. “You….you just don’t understand..”
  40. “Okay, so. No more caffeine for you, that’s apparent.”
  41. “Where were you last night?”
  42. “Okay but have you seen what my hair does?! I kills people!”
  43. “I don’t think you understand the term 'dead or alive’, because I don’t know if this thing IS dead or alive”
  44. “What do you mean, ‘there wasn’t a murder weapon’?”
  45. “Time flies, but I can fly faster.”
  46. “You just crashed with MY podship into that wall and all you say is »It’s just a scratch«?”
  47. “Now sweetie, don’t get scared when you hear the gunshots, okay? Just don’t come to the house.”
  48. “and… why do you have a gorilla in your room again?”
  49. “Okay, last question: why is there an owl in the fridge?”
  50. “Well shit, you’re hotter than i was expecting.”
  51. “It turns out, space isn’t actually the final frontier”
  52. “If I had hands right now I would choke you.”
  53. “…why did you think it would be a good idea to set that on fire?”
  54. “Close your eyes, sweetie. They can’t get you then.”
  55. “That tiger, that tiger eats humans”
  56. “I swear, if ONE more person comes at me with their hot dog buns–”
  57. “If you would have just kissed them, we wouldn’t be in this mess! Now we’re tied up on traintracks about to be smushed like bugs!”
  58. “Do I want to know why your'e in my apartment wearing only sport shorts which are quite tight?”
  59. “What do you mean that woman wasn’t you?”
  60. “Why is there a dog on the couch?!”
  61. “Stop dude stop, you scared the dogs.”
  62. “What on earth made you think the banana was a good idea?
  63. "Do I want to know whats in the box”
  64. “Wait, no! Please don’t leave me here, it’s getting dark. Have you not heard the stories of the things in these woods?”
  65. “Those were shoes yesterday”
  66. “Can I at least put on my socks first?”
  67. “Why is the Devil in your living room?” “It’s Saturday, Tom. Date night.”
  68. “John, get your damn death ray off of my cat’s bed. You’ve given poor Fluffy radiation poisoning!”
  69. “I get it, you think I don’t care about you. You think I want nothing to do with you… And you’re right.”
  70. “No. Not after last time.”
  71. “What made you think you could survive this?”
  72. “No! I never said you could reenact General Sherman’s Total War tactic from the Civil War! We’re gonna get arrested!”
  73. “Why does our 8 y/o daughter think that THAT werewolf is her pet dog?! He’s been terrorizing our entire town!!”
  74. “Have you even bothered to consider your options before deciding to bungee jump into the Pacific?”
  75. “That is NOT how you bury a dead body, Jared!”
  76. “Do you know where the cat is? I haven’t seen it in two weeks…”
  77. “You did what?!” “It’s not that big of a deal” “You killed a man!”
  78. “But you love me, don’t you? So you’ll forgive me.”
  79. “I don’t care.”
  80. “You’re a fucking asshole, you know that, right?”
  81. “You’d be surprised how flexible a sloth can be.”
  82. “Oh great, the world exploded…. again”
  83. “I dressed up for THIS?”
  84. “Why? And how?”
  85. “Would it hurt you to tell me exactly where we’re going?”
  86. “You can’t take back those words anymore. Or everything else you did.”
  87. “he didn’t do anything I fucking told him to do!”
  88. “When they came, why didn’t you fight?”
  89. “What are you doing here?” “I was about to ask you the same thing…” “Well, it’s called the hanging tree for a reason.”
  90. “__, please come down from the tree, i’ll treat you to pizza.”
  91. “You can… seriously? Oh my gosh, teach me teach me teach me!!”
  92. “I wasn’t aware that 'monster’ was a term of endearment.”
  93. “Yes, I’m sure your flower pot really is trying to kill you, Debra.”
  94. “Why is our child on the roof?”
  95. “Do you want a hug? Will that help?”
  96. “How could you sign us up for this without reading the fine print?! It says right there that we have to give up everything!!!”
  97. “And it’s been stuck in there how long now?”
  98. “I learned I can’t trust you when the world was "fine”, now tell me one reason not to place a bullet between your eyes and listen to you.“
  99. “Why the hell are you naked in my room?”
  100. "Having criminals line up against their will and you killing them is not community service!”

100 prompts. Amazing. Thank you for sharing your ideas and contributing to our community.

Let’s make a new list right now! Leave a reply and don’t forget the double quotes “”! I will use the first 100 prompts for the next list. One prompt per amigo please!

I’m tired. My mind is working and working and it can’t stop. How do you stop thinking about people? The ones that you hurt, the ones that hurt you, the ones that are so beautiful your heart starts exploding, the ones that you love, the ones that you have a crush on, the ones that make you smile and laugh, the ones that make you feel safe and comfortable, the ones that make you understand the world a little better, the ones that make you cry at night, the ones that are always there for you, the ones that don’t write to you for several weeks, the ones that make your heart beat faster. The ones.
—  dewdropheart 
Feel-Good Movies Each Sign Should Watch

Aries: Boyhood (2014) //  “You know how everyone’s always saying seize the moment? I don’t know, I’m kind of thinking it’s the other way around, you know, like the moment seizes us.”

Taurus: Life As We Know It (2010) // “Having somebody help you doesn’t mean that you fail, it just means that you’re not in it alone.”

Gemini: It’s Kind of a Funny Story (2010) // “People are screwed up in this world. I’d rather be with someone screwed up and open about it than somebody perfect and ready to explode.”

Cancer: 500 Days of Summer (2009) // “I’m always the one who loves more. That’s my thing.”

Leo: The Spectacular Now (2013) // “It’s fine to ‘live in the now’. But the best part about ‘now’ is there’s another one tomorrow. And I’m gonna start making them count.”

Virgo: My Girl (1991) // “I only surround myself with people I find intellectually stimulating.”

Libra: Little Miss Sunshine (2006) // “You do what you love and fuck the rest.”

Scorpio: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) // “I’m always anxious thinking I’m not living my life to the fullest, you know? Taking advantage of every possibility?”

Sagittarius: That Awkward Moment (2014) //  “I love the way she laughs. I love the way we fit together in bed because we’re the same height and our crotches line up perfectly.”

Capricorn: The Art of Getting By (2011) //  “You’re going to have to start using that brain of yours to access that talent of yours and show that beautiful heart of yours.”

Aquarius: Silver Linings Playbook (2012) // “You have to do everything you can, you have to work your hardest, and if you do, if you stay positive, you have a shot at a silver lining.”

Pisces: The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012) // “So I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons, and maybe we’ll never know most of them.”

3

A Richonne Ranking: 40 Moments
[30] Naked – The Next World, 6x10

I want to personally thank Andy ‘Ricky Dicky Doo Dah Grimes’ Clutterbuck and My Girl Danai Gurira for their unyielding dedication to their craft. Their performances here as Post-Coital Couple #1 are truly unparalleled. As if the kiss wasn’t enough to make my head explode, this quick little follow-up scene just about finished me off. Every detail of the frame has been carefully constructed to kill me. Hand placements. Leg positions. Mostly hand placements. One hand in particular. Ass man, as established in… err, almost every episode?

Any argument that Rick and Michonne will be softened by their relationship is swiftly addressed here. Even at their most vulnerable – asleep and naked – they are ready to leap into action and I am HERE. FOR. IT. Look at this couple of warriors turning into a warrior couple.  

  • Andy: It’s great. Two warriors, two warrior lovers. Bring it on! […] The final scene was supposed to be a little more demure. Danai and I just said, “The audience has seen us have a kiss. Then, there’s this reveal of us in bed. The only way we’re going to up this ante and make it real is we’ve got to be naked. We wouldn’t hide under sheets. We’d go for the gun and katana.” We wanted viewers to know nothing’s changed. They’re just ferocious.
  • Tom Payne: So Danai and Andy get up out of bed. First of all, she’s pointing her sword at my face and worrying about me looking. I’m like, “I’m just looking at the sword because I don’t wanna lose my eye.” And then Kari comes in and says, “Can you look Andy up and down and then smile at him?” I’m like, “No!” There was a moment where I was like, “Yeah, maybe I’ll do that…” but Andy was completely naked in front of me. 
  • Danai: It was fun. It was very bonding and, ultimately, we had a great time that evening. 
Wolfgang & Sun

Originally posted by sensatessource

  • They don’t say much, but they FIGHT for their loved ones
  • They don’t show emotions, but they PROTECT their loved ones
  • They’ll kill for survival, but they’ll DIE for their loved ones
  • They don’t smile much, but when they do, it comes from PURE happiness
  • I was SO HAPPY to see so much interactions between Sun and Wolfgang happened in this season – I loved this pair since Christmas special when they had this whole “if you need help” “I’m fine. If you need some air” “I’m good” then * both smirk * scene
  • There are so many things Sun and Wolfgang share in common
  • Both are the quiet ones in the cluster; they are badasses; and THEY DESERVE PEACE & HAPPINESS – and LOVE!
  • They might be strong on the outside, but they have soft heart inside; and that sometimes make these two people blame themselves for what they’ve done
  • Their mothers loved them; their fathers…one was abusive and the other was ignorant; and their other family members (like Steiner and Joong Ki) just couldn’t leave them in peace
  • One thing they don’t share in common, other than their fighting style, is that when Sun needs help, she asks for help. Whereas Wolfgang would NEVER, EVER ask for help – even when he’s being captured and tortured by Whispers
  • I really hope that in the end, both Sun and Wolfgang find their own peace (except rest-in-peace bullshit, I won’t allow it)

Favorite moments in season 2 (spoilers!)

2x02 Who Am I?

Originally posted by warinfinities

– I like that when they’re visiting each other, neither of them says ‘hi’ or ‘what’s up?’ Instead they just simply have a short eye contact and that’s it. The zoo scene sums up Sun and Wolfgang’s relationship. And we love this quiet-yet-we-know-each-other-by-just-looking-at-one’s-eyes. PERFECTION

– Not just from this scene, but most conversations between Sun and Wolfgang are short, very straightforward & concise…and that’s what makes their dynamic so real and sincere because we know both characters share a deep connection through their unspoken pain

2x03 Obligate Mutualisms

@thelovelylights

– OK, I love Sun just the way she is. But I absolutely love her when she embodies Wolfang. Two words; and her level of being badass just exploded there. Hats off to Doona’s perfect portrayal of Wolfgang/Max

2x07 I Have No Room In My Heart For Hate

@princessamericachavez

– In graveyard scene, everyone from the cluster talks to her from their heart…from their experience. What differentiates Wolfgang from rest of them is he’s the only one who says ‘the world would be better without’ people like Joong Ki and Wolfgang’s father. Revenge is a double-edged sword. It’s bittersweet. And Wolfgang has already had a taste of revenge..several times. However, I don’t think sweetness of revenge or his skepticism about justice are entire reasons why he says it. I think it’s because deep down he knows Sun is stronger than she thinks; strong enough to not only make Joong Ki pay for her father’s death but also take in the bitterness of revenge

2x08 All I Want Right Now Is One More Bullet (1)

@fvuckyeahsense8

– YES! YES! YES! A thousand times YES! THAT SMIRK IS EVERYTHING! I don’t we need more explanation to this, at all * drops mic *

2x08 All I Want Right Now Is One More Bullet (2)

@s8gif

– OMG. Did they literally finish each other’s sentence? OH YES THEY DID! * drops mic, again *

2x07 I Have No Room In My Heart For Hate & 2x09 What Family Actually Means

@litoshernandos

@superdamnvers

– This is not an interaction between them, but I really wanted to go over this little parallel scenes. Another thing I love about Sun and Wolfgang is they don’t use their strengths to bully someone or to just show off. They use them to protect their loved ones when they are treated like shit by shitty people not nicely

2x11 You Want A War?

@nestarearland

– I know I didn’t include “I would” in Gala scene. Doesn’t mean I don’t like it; it’s just kinda goes along with what I’ve written in graveyard scene. I didn’t want to be redundant. But yeah, I liked that scene too: Wolfgang in gangsta mode walking by Sun’s side while others are trying to stop her XD

– But back to the point, I personally like this scene more simply because I love when Wolfgang shows his gentle and caring side of him towards his cluster. Like when he cared for Will [x]. Also, we don’t really get to see Sun being afraid a lot (I mean of course, she’s a warrior), so it was kinda good to see her being weak and vulnerable for a moment but then quickly regaining her calmness after her cluster reassures she’s going to be fine. It shows how much Sun trusts her cluster; and how much her cluster cares for her (PLATONIC LOVE RIGHT HERE PEOPLE!)


I would say most interactions between Wolfgang and Sun happened during ‘sharing’ – resulting great action sequences, which also proves (again) that these two are not talkers; they’re fighters. Maybe that’s why they make an awesome pair!

just imagine: you’re a 17 year old teen, going to school and getting the chance to take this role in this low budget production that’s going to take place at your school. you think: cool, i’ve always wanted to act and that’s my chance to!

then, out of nowhere, that low budget production explodes and turns into this huge phenomenon all over the world and people want to meet you, they want to talk to you, they want to take pictures with you. and it all hits you out of nowhere.

and besides having school work, and friends, and a theater play you’re in and you want to be good at it, you want to rock it– but there’s the other side of that medal, the dark side no one told you about before, because it wasn’t supposed to be like that.

and suddenly, fans from all over the world want to meet you, they come to your school and they make you feel like you have to make them happy, because they’re giving you something back, they’re giving you appreciation, so you should appreciate them too. but it’s getting out of hand, and you don’t know how to handle it anymore. you don’t have the time to take a fucking breath because everywhere you look, there could be someone wanting something from you. you have to sacrifice your lunch break. you have to sacrifice your freedom in a place that’s trapping you anyway, because school is never that much fun.

just, please, take a good hard look in the mirror and think to yourself: would you want this for yourself? and please don’t come into my inbox saying that he chose that. because no, he didn’t.

no, he did not choose that.

Love Covers.

Part of my hospital chaplaincy duties is to write a reflection on how it’s going. Identities may be altered for privacy. All the writings are here.


I’ve seen love. I mean, pure love. The kind that builds you, that bursts wide open and free, the kind they tell you about, but you were afraid to believe.

A nine-year-old boy comes into the trauma bay with deep, jagged lacerations all over his back. Car accident, roll-over; dad and children nearly ejected, going fifty. His shirt is shredded. His back is really torn up, almost ribbons in several places, blood filling his shorts. He’s fidgeting, squirming, but not from his wounds. He’s trying to sit up, eyes darting, looking for someone. He’s trying to tell something to the paramedics, to the nurses and doctors, to me. 

Medicine, he says in a choked whisper, medicine for my sister. She has a new kidney. Medicine.

A second later, his four year old sister is wheeled in—they had been in the same car accident. She’s in shock. Her brother keeps saying, Medicine, for my sister. She needs her kidney medicine.

A nurse replies, “On it. I’m on it, little man.”

I go to the nine year old, pull up a seat, and tell him, “You’re a good brother.”

“Thanks,” he says, finally resting his head. The nurses move around us, not missing a beat, and there’s just me and the kid, eyes locked, his eyes on fire.

“What happened?” I ask him.

“I heard the car inside make a boom, like a firecracker,” he says. “I knew something was wrong. I knew it! I grabbed my sister … and I put myself around her, because … because I didn’t want glass to get in her face.”

I remember his back. The lacerations. 

Suddenly, I’m crying. I lose all professionalism. I’m just crying.

“You’re a hero,” I tell him. “You saved your sister’s life.”

“But her medicine?” he asks. “You’ll make sure she gets it? She takes it everyday for her kidney. It was the one that I gave her.”

“Yes,” I tell him, trying to smile through flooded eyes. “Yes. You’re a good brother,” I say again. “What’s your name?”

He says, “Angel.”

Of course it is.

I sit with him, quietly, as the medical team begins to work on his back. He makes no noise, except to ask how his sister is doing. 

I hold back tears. I feel angry, that something like this had to happen to Angel and his sister, that we live in such a world where no child is safe from destiny, from fate, from the universe, from God, where kidneys don’t work and cars roll over—but I think about Angel covering his sister, and that on our tiny fractured little spinning rock in the random cold chaos of meaningless collision, where the world can explode in glass, one child didn’t hesitate to die for love. I think it is awful that they have to be here in this hospital, but my heart stretches to this other place, where love is powerful and real, and that within lawless disorder, very beautiful things can still happen, and that perhaps pure love must be born through pain, through the life of another. 

— J.S.

5

Aron literally checking up on Jonghyun every single hour while he does his 1st solo variety show, by texting the manager asking if he’s OK.. makes my heart feel like it will explode.

People talked a lot of shit about Aron not going onto produce 101. They acted like he didn’t care about Nu'est… but as you can see, in reality his members mean the world to him. Aron loves them all A LOT, and even though when he first came to Korea him + members didn’t care about any social hierarchy, he apologized to JR for not being a better Hyung (even though even in 2012 he looked after them well).

As leader JR as taken on so much burden from a young age, especially as the youngest leader ever to debut (16).

I can see both JR and Aron have changed since the end of produce 101. Aron seems to be in less of a slump and has his motivation back, while JR has regained his confidence as Leader which he had lost for so many years.

Even though Minhyun is not here to be the mother of Nu'est for a long time. I’m glad JR has a Hyung like Aron to look after and protect him no matter what.

P.s the massive smile JR gives Aron when he finds out he’s been looking out for him is the purest thing on this earth.

anonymous asked:

hey, i need ur help. i had this idea for a book and i don't rlly know if it's good? so the idea came bc of my physics teacher, he talked about that the sun would just explode one day and i thought, why not make a story out of it? so i thought about the main character living in a futuristic sci-fi world (it would be a million years from now) and they all lnow that the sun will explode some day not far from now. when it finally happens, the main charakter and a few others can flee on a space (1)

Advice for all writers:

  • Nothing is original. Nothing. Not even your favorite book/movie/TV show
  • All ideas are bad until they are written
  • All ideas are a failure that will bankrupt you until they don’t
  • Do not pitch your book idea before you’ve written it
  • Do not seek justification, approval, or permission to write your idea
  • Assume your idea has been done before and done better and DO IT ANYWAY

This is how writing works, otherwise we’d have three books, two TV shows, and one movie in the entire world.

That is my advice. Now WRITE.

It was said later that he came under bad influences at this stage.  But the secret of the history of Edward d’Eath was that he came under no outside influences at all, unless you count all those dead kings.  He just came under the influence of himself.

That’s where people get it wrong.  Individuals aren’t naturally paid-up members of the human race, except biologically.  They need to be bounced around by the Brownian motion of society, which is a mechanism by which human beings constantly remind one another that they are, well, human beings.

Men at Arms

“And yet we say this.  Here in this cave at the end of the world peace is made between dwarf and troll and we will march beyond the hand of Death together.  For the enemy is not Troll, nor is it Dwarf, but it is the baleful, the malign, the cowardly, the vessels of hatred, those who do a bad thing and call it good.  Those we fought today, but the willful fool is eternal and will say—”

“This is just a trick!” Ardent shouted.

“—say this is a trick,” Bashfullsson continued, “and so we implore: come to the caves under this valley, where you will find us sharing the peace that cannot be braken.”

Thud!

I AM NOTHING IF NOT LITERAL-MINDED.  TRICKERY WITH WORDS IS WHERE HUMANS LIVE.

“All right,” said Susan.  “I’m not stupid.  You’re saying humans need… fantasies to make life bearable.”

REALLY?  AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL?  NO.  HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN.  TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

“Tooth fairies?  Hogfathers?  Little—”

YES.  AS PRACTICE.  YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

“So we can believe the big ones?”

YES.  JUSTICE.  MERCY.  DUTY.  THAT SORT OF THING.

“They’re not the same at all!”

YOU THINK SO?  THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY.  AND YET—  Death waved a hand.  AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME… SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

“Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what’s the point—”

MY POINT EXACTLY.

She tried to assemble her thoughts.

THERE IS A PLACE WHERE TWO GALAXIES HAVE BEEN COLLIDING FOR A MILLION YEARS, said Death, apropos of nothing.  DON’T TRY TO TELL ME THAT’S RIGHT.

“Yes, but people don’t think about that,” said Susan.  Somewhere there was a bed…

CORRECT.  STARS EXPLODE, WORLDS COLLIDE, THERE’S HARDLY ANYWHERE IN THE UNIVERSE WHERE HUMANS CAN LIVE WITHOUT BEING FROZEN OR FRIED, AND YET YOU BELIEVE THAT A… A BED IS A NORMAL THING.  IT IS THE MOST AMAZING TALENT.

“Talent?”

OH, YES.  A VERY SPECIAL KIND OF STUPIDITY.  YOU THINK THE WHOLE UNIVERSE IS INSIDE YOUR HEADS.

“You make us sound mad,” said Susan.  A nice warm bed…

NO.  YOU NEED TO BELIEVE IN THINGS THAT AREN’T TRUE.  HOW ELSE CAN THEY BECOME? said Death, helping her up on to Binky.

Hogfather

“People as things, that’s where it starts.”

“Oh, I’m sure there are worse crimes—”

“But they starts with thinking about people as things…”

Carpe Jugulum

beautiful

A quick review of Michael Lee Brown as Evan Hansen, written by the wonderful and amazing @bowtiedbitch, who saw the show with MLB two days ago and was kind enough to share this with me! (with some very minor edits for clarity)

“So he came out to rapturous applause, and at the time I wasn’t sure why but now I know [it was his debut as Evan]! He was so amazing and true with the anxiety ticks, it seemed so real and he would talk fast in the beginning telling the story about his palms being sweaty. His physicality at being withdrawn and nervous showed perfectly, and his intention was always spot on. The parts that got me the most were “Worlds Fail” and “So Big/So Small”. The whole build up with the family arguing over the reveal of Connor’s suicide note, I only had eyes for MLB. His face. Oh my god, you could SEE the building anxiety and emotions. 

“He was pale, his eyes were bloodshot, he was rubbing/tapping his chest and pulling at his hair, he alternated between hyperventilating and not breathing until he just exploded in a sob with the reveal. How he sang through the sobbing– because he was full on sobbing–I have no idea. At one point spit fell from his mouth and landed audibly on the stage. It was aggressive, deep from within crying. The other characters all just stared, stunned. 

“After he went though it and ran out and went to the scene with his mother, it got even more powerful. She goes to hug him when she talks about how she knew she’d miss things. And he jumped at her. He held on, sprawled in her lap, crying into her shoulder. And the next scene? At the orchard? Put together. He took the few minutes to quick change and wipe the tears, breath, come onstage for the last scene.”

EXO STANS WHEN THEIR BIAS HAS A VOICE CRACK ON STAGE (OT12)

baekhyun stans:

  • laughing hysterically while posting about how amazing it was on twitter
  • “baekhyun’s voice sounds better when it cracks”
  • don’t bother fighting off antis because they’ll end up agreeing with them for completely different reasons
  • crOAKS
  • sets as wake up alarm
  • “i’m so proud of my boy”

chanyeol stans:

  • almost like baekhyun stans but instead of laughing they’re yelping
  • “he was so happy that it exploded out of his throat and sounded like a million fangirls just died oh wait that happened”
  • happier because they’re finally letting the world see the reason as to why they stan chanyeol
  • but half of them would be like “gosh stop hating on chanyeol”
  • and the other half would be like “gOSh stOp hATInG oN CHAnYEol”
  • but then there’s the group that’s all chill about it y’know

jongdae stans:

  • oh god
  • they wouldn’t just giggle at it
  • they’d turn it into a fucking religion
  • “worship jongdae’s voice crack because he did so well and we should appreciate the fact that he sang his hardest for us”
  • wouldn’t really poke too much fun at it because they’re probably too busy spamming the comments of the performance with love for this boy
  • but there’s that 13% that would be like “oKAY I’M HIGH OFF OF HIS VOICE CRACK SOMEONE HELp”

kyungsoo stans:

  • “did that just happen”
  • in shock
  • like they’ll be shook for days on end
  • but then they’ll return to their normal calm-ass selves because they’re mature and wouldn’t make a fuss out of it
  • defending kyungsoo’s talent because their precious baby is at risk of a flood of memes from the other stans
  • but deep inside they’re happy with it

jongin stans:

  • “it wasn’t a voice crack is was literal sex”
  • legit every single sound that jongin produces is the secret ingredient for endless orgasms for them
  • tHIRSTY
  • other stans won’t be able to make fun of jongin because jongin stans will be all up in their feed like “THIS IS WHAT SEX IS”
  • don’t even bother making fun of them
  • “jongin should just publish an album of entirely voice cracks”

kris stans:

  • completely lost
  • probably just shook at how beautiful that voice crack was and thankful that it happened
  • “see this is why i appreciate him”
  • but also completely pissed at the other stans who made fun of his
  • “it’s music to my ears”
  • licks lips

yixing stans:

  • 10000000% support mode activated
  • normally yixing stans are soft and precious and literal angels but don’t even try fucking with them this time
  • publishing cute lil messages of support on weibo and sending them to yixing and making sure he doesn’t overwork himself
  • like they care so much that it might make him cry
  • yixing !! don’t !! over !! work !! yourself !!
  • will support him to the ends of the earth

luhan stans:

  • “that’s my lu”
  • would probably turn it into a running meme
  • half of them wouldn’t even be able to tell that it was a voice crack because it was too subtle
  • they’re just so freakishly chill about it that it’s scary
  • but then there’s that 16% that will be like “i think i just died”
  • and then the 27% of people that are like “oh nice”

junmyeon stans:

  • pROTECT JUNMYEON AT ALL COSTS
  • “don’t give him all this stress he did amazing”
  • support junmyeon for the rest of their lives
  • even 139198319 years after it happened some futuristic citizens of earth or whatever planet we colonize will have his name in a textbook supporting him
  • “petition to appreciate junmyeon’s hard work”
  • “if you don’t like his voice cracks you hate him as a human being”

sehun stans:

  • “that was amazing”
  • won’t hesitate to bite anyone that dares to sass sehun for having that voice crack
  • “my baby is growing up”
  • half are like “woah sehun’s going through puberty”
  • the other half are like “wAKE UP YOU SNAKES SEE HE’S SO NERVOUS STOP BEING MEAN”
  • this is a beautiful fandom

tao stans:

  • “he probably did that cause he wanted to kill us”
  • but then they’ll also be like
  • “how tf do you get a voice crack in a rap”
  • rolling on the floor in nervous sweats because he can manipulate his voice so fucking well
  • “don’t say his voice is soft it’s beautiful”
  • a t t ac k an t i s

minseok stans:

  • what do you mean “voice crack”
  • that wasn’t a voice crack that was the sound of minseok giving birth to a million new fangirls in one second
  • praise !! him !!
  • they’re usually soft but if you attack them this time they’ll convert you into a minseok stan by their religion
  • “there’s no such thing as a voice crack”
  • so supportive it hurts

Making a film, you’re in a really dark tunnel and the only kind of illumination is the shared experience you’re having with your fellow cast and director. That’s the process of making the film and it isn’t until the world puts their eyes to it that you find out if it’s creating any kind of connection at all. But every single film at some stage of the film I think, “I wonder what this is going to be?”

5

So I decided my new life goal is to become a magical girl viking

Because I love metal. I love metal so much. It’s the music that calms me down the most and I fucking love metal heads. Everything about it is great.

I just also wish I could be super fucking cute while also being a metal head. I mean I do it anyway but imagine if I could do it BETTER. LIKE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS! Be super brutal and badass but also super femme and adorable!!

I want to chug beer and smash it then explode into rainbow sparkles and bows and get a cute little outfit with a little skirt and a fur cloak and take my sparkly weapon and go cut off the head of a dragon and write it’s name on my face in it’s own blood and drink some more and giggle adorably and have a talking pet that instructs me and my comrades about our magical powers. That’s what I want out of my life.

Also I might have to draw more of these and by might I MEAN FUCKING YES

Castration Anxiety

“For kali!”
I couldn’t count how many of them there were. The smoke obscured their exact numbers, but the amazons must have numbered in the hundred. I was tied, spread-eagle and naked, to two massive pieces of lumber.

One approached me. She was clearly some kind of leader, by how the others cheered as she stepped forward. She wore nothing but a smile. She was fit as hell, with toned abs connecting her unshaven pussy to her huge, swinging breasts. God, she was hot. I hoped Kali, whoever she was, needed a fertile male to impregnate their leader for another generation.

“For years, Kali has been angry at our lack of male sacrifice. But finally, one comes to us!”

Sacrifice? What the hell is-

OOF

My thoughts fell out of me with my wind, as a huge knee connected with my unprotected nuts. Pain exploded through me, as cheers exploded through the crowd. Had I had control of all of my limbs, I would be on the ground, dryheaving and holding my bruised sac.

“Tonight, we give her what she wants! Tonight, we make one less male in the world”

Oh god, were they going to kill me? I struggled against the vines holding me, but got nowhere.

SPLAT

Her fist connected with my left nut. More nutpain swelled up inside of me, starting at the base of my sac and working its way through my body. I just wanted it to end.

Splat! Splat! Splat!

3 more punches. It seemed like more were joining in the free for all ballbusting, but I sure as hell couldn’t tell. The only thing I could think about was the gut-wrenching pain emanating from my manhood.

THUD

A stomp connected. Somehow I was laying down. What was happening? I was still tied to the wooden X.

“I hope you enjoyed your time among the weaker sex.”

Who said that?
SSSSPLAT

I recognized the sound before I felt the pain. Just before my world exploded in pain, I realized the last stomp had ruptured my left testicle. I felt its remains swishing around in my sac, as feminine hands palpated it, breaking any chunks the stomp may have left intact. If there had been any chance of repair, they were demolishing it.

They were breaking my balls.

“Kali has taken half of his lifeforce! Let us relinquish the rest!”

I don’t know how many more kicks, punches, stomps, and heels followed that one. My right nut had always been a little bigger than my left, so I guess it makes sense that it lasted longer.

Splat!

Of course, my head couldn’t comprehend any of these thoughts.

Crunch!
-
Only one thing occupied my barely conscious mind

Splat!

The fact that a group of amazons, naked and hotter than any woman I’ve ever seen

Squish!

Were going to turn me into a eunuch.

SPPLAT!

And there goes righty.

————————————————–

I woke up drenched in sweat. My alarm read 3:34. I had work in 4 hours, but there was no way I was going back to sleep. I swear, I could still feel the bruises from the nightmare.

————————————————–

I hadn’t really needed a therapist before. I started going to Karen shortly after my divorce, mostly because I needed a pretty face to look at once a week. She had raven black hair, and perky, petite breasts. Her legs went from the floor all the way up to her perfect, toned bubble butt. Lying on her couch, I could usually look up her unprofessionally short miniskirt, and caught a few glimpses of her panties once or twice. In short, she provided an expensive, classy, personal striptease. Not that she knew it, of course. I usually made up some bullshit issue about my parents or childhood or something. Nothing too embarrassing, just convincing enough that I would get a sympathy hug or something.

I certainly didn’t want to tell her that I’d been dreaming about girls removing my testicles in a variety of ways for the past few weeks. I still held out hope she would sleep with me at some point, and no girl wants to fuck a guy with those types of problems. But this had seriously started to interfere with my personal life.

“Anything in particular you want to talk about this week, Jeremy?”

How do I start…

“Karen, what do you know about dreams?”

She giggled, her breasts bouncing wonderfully. I don’t think I’ve ever managed to return from once of these sessions without immediately jerking off.

“Dreams are more significant than most people realize. They can symbolize desires, fears, anxieties, hidden deep within your subconscious. Have you been having some strange ones?”

I was planning on toning down the severity of my dreams. I figured just telling her I was getting beaten up by women was good enough. But as I looked into those almond-brown eyes, I realized I couldn’t possibly lie to her. Maybe she won’t sleep with me, but I need to stop these fucking nightmares.

I told her about the amazons, cheerleaders, nurses, teachers, swim instructors, dominatrices, businessladies, and random women on the street who have been castrating me for weeks. I told her about the vicious ball popping, and how none had been kind enough to leave a solid chunk of manhood floating around in my nocturnally abused sac. I spared no detail, and as I elaborated my surprisingly intricate recollections of these terrors, she seemed to enjoy it.

Maybe enjoy is the wrong term. She just wasn’t giving me the dry heaves and disgusted looks I expected one to give upon hearing story after story about a guy losing his most valued organs in the most painful ways. In fact, a wry smile was forming on her lips, as if she enjoyed hearing my pain. After I finished, she delivered her diagnosis.

“Your case is not as uncommon as you might think. Freud called it ‘castration anxiety’, for obvious reason. There have been numerous studies into treatment, and luckily for you, I did my PhD in this very specific subfield!”

Ah, so she wasn’t some kind of sadist. This stuff was just familiar to her. Relieving, although I wondered what kind of person would voluntarily specialize in hearing first-hand accounts of vicious castration.

“Your case sounds particularly severe, but I’m sure I can help you out. Castration anxiety comes from an internal fear of the feminine …”

She prattled on and on about ids and egos and whatnot. As hot as she was, Karen was no slouch intellectually. Not that I cared; I’d bang the brains out of any girl with an ass like hers. As she went on, I caught a glimpse of her skirt, and felt blood rush to my nether regions.

“So, are you ready? We can start right now!”

“What?”
“I’m going to need you to get completely naked, to start.”

WHOA. In any other case, I might have asked a few questions about what I had just missed, but I knew a come on when I heard one. I practically jumped out of my clothes, and sat on her couch bare-ass naked, awaiting her “treatment”.

She giggled again. “Wow, so eager. Most guys aren’t excited when they hear what’s necessary to cure a severe castration anxiety disorder. I probably won’t even have to tie you down.”

Wait, wha-

CRUNCH

Before I could react, her kneecap connected with my all-too-real nuts. No nightmare. This was real.

SPLAT

A second knee. It’s incredible how much more conscious ballbusting hurts than its unconscious counterpart. Nothing any Amazon ever did to me in my sleep compared to this.

“Like I was saying, I’m not going to castrate you or do any permanent damage of course.”

Well that’s a relief. If only it matched the treatment she was delivering to my nuts. I tried to beg her to stop, or roll out of the way, or do something to prevent another ball-exploding impact, but before I could, her balled up fist connect squarely with the center of my left testicle, jabbing it into my pelvic bone, and releasing an agony I couldn’t describe if I wanted to.

“The purpose of this strategically-applied testicular pain is to make you realize that females can’t castrate you as easily as your subconscious mind thinks. Your balls can take quite a beating, you see.”

I realize she wasn’t drawing back for another hit, and let out a sigh of relief. Then I realized that was because her hand was already firmly on my sac, squeezing the shit out of it. My balls bulged between her fingers, and my eyes bulged out of my head. Her fingernails were digging into the sensitive tissue in the back of my manhood. How could this possibly be helpful to my mental health?

“In college, less than 20% of the males I tried this treatment on suffered a ruptured testicle! And nearly 98% came out with at least one testicle intact! Since you only really need one testicle to do anything with, I can guarantee you’ll be fertile after I’m done with you.”

Through the haze of pain, I could barely comprehend her words.

“Now, for the rapid testicle compressions.”

She wrapped each of her petite hands around one of my testicles, and leaned forward. I could see down her blouse, to the soft, tender breasts housed within. I could imagine a slightly different scenario, with her being the one completely naked, under my control. Rubbing my rock-hard cock against those puppies….

“Oop! That’s not an unusually reaction, nothing to be embarassed about.”

I realized my rock-hard cock was no fantasy. Even though my mind was in incomprehensible pain, some part had managed to realize that a beautiful woman was touching my most sensitive parts.

She stared for a while at my member, a small smile growing on her lips. I hoped it was in admiration, but I knew better. I had never been a particularly “big” guy, with my biggest hard-on coming in generously at 5.5 inches. At least she was professional about it.

“Here we go!”

Her hands rhythmically compressed and uncompressed my nuts. Her nails were like daggers, scratching the tender meat that housed my surely damaged genetic material. How could this not leave permanent damage?

But my eggs were too scrambled for me to voice any of these concerns. I kept staring down her chest, futilely hoping to counteract the pain from my junk with some pleasure. My cock remained marble-hard.

“Aaaand that should be it for today. You can get dressed now. Next week, we’ll try to take it a little further. Remember, you won’t be fully cured until you’re not scared of testicular damage, no matter what kind of abuse you take!”

I tucked my tender balls into my pants. I’m not the kind of guy who wears tight jeans, so I knew my balls had swollen considerably when I couldn’t fit them into my pants without a painful squeeze. As I dressed, Karen watched me, a grin from ear to ear. I guess she must have been proud of herself for her work.

“Oh! One more thing, I almost forgot. You can’t complete your treatment without these!”

She pulled out a small bottle of blue pills and handed them to me. I almost questioned her ability to prescribe medicine as a therapist, but I was too pain-addled to question anything.

“One per day, before you sleep. See you next week!”

That night, I went my first night without any nightmares. Of course, I hardly slept at all, as my huge, black and blue nuts kept me from passing out for more than half an hour without jolting me awake, screaming and clutching my wounded manhood.

The week passed uneventfully. My nuts began to shrink back to their normal size, and I almost was able to walk in a normal manner. I managed to go to work without anyone noticing my malady, so I thought. And, until Tuesday night, I thought I was cured. No nightmares at all!
—————————-

GOOOOOOAAAAAAL

A soccer ball whizzed by my head. A cry of disappointment came from my teammates. As I surveyed the field, I realized I was the only male there. Strange.

“You can’t fucking do anything right! I knew choosing a boy for a goalie was a bad idea!”

Some girl (on my team apparently) was bitching at me about my inability to be a team player or some shit. At least she couldn’t see my eyes behind this goalie mask, as they were firmly fixed on her massive tits. I couldn’t believe she wasn’t wearing a sports bra. Those things were seriously the size of soccer balls themselves.

“Are you even fucking listening to me?”

Ugh, what is she eve-

SLAM

A cleated heel connected with my ballsac. Why didn’t I get a cup as a goalie?

As I fell to the ground, she lifted my legs up and spread them. I tried to resist, but I couldn’t, somehow.

Her foot rested on my busted balls, the tips of her cleats digging into my nuts. A smile curled on her face.

“Maybe these are distracting you. You really think me and the other girls can’t see you ogling us behind your mask? You’re a goalie. You are supposed to block balls, not have them.”

Oh shit.

Her weight shifted, and suddenly her cleats were not gently resting on top of my manhood. They were digging in, crushing my only chance at children.

“This won’t take long, and as soon as I’m done with these, we can get back to the game.”

She giggled. Why weren’t the refs stepping in? I felt my sac splitting where her cleats dug in.

Suddenly, just as I was sure my manhood was going to explode into a familiar sac of goo, she stepped off and bent down. If I were smart, I would have bolted off then. But of course, like an idiot, I sat there and waited for her next move.

She ripped my gear off with unbelievable ease, leaving my mangled nuts and dick uncovered for all to see. When she saw what my manhood had to offer, she broke into a laugh.

“I know some guys are growers, not showers, but that is the most pathetic dick I’ve ever seen! At least you won’t miss getting laid when I finish crushing these.”

I begged her to stop, but it was as pointless as begging the tide to come back in.

She stepped onto my nuts, grinding them into the muddy field. Pain exploded through me.

“Why are you even on a team if you can’t fucking play soccer? Honestly, losing these makes you fit in with team dynamic so much better.”

I looked up her leg. Through her shorts, I saw that she wasn’t wearing underwear. What kind of girl plays soccer commando? In fact, I realized she was completely naked. Had I had an ounce of mental comprehension at this point, this would have tipped me off that I was in a dream.

I stared up at her well-shaven bush, hiding a cute, tight pussy. Those massive DD’s swung ominously, like bells tolling for the end of my manhood. My dick was at its full 4.5 inches (what?! What happened to the last inch? How could I even measure my dick this accurately? Fuck I can’t think about this I’m getting castrated).

“Good. Keep that little thing out of my way. I’ll take care of it after I’m done with your nuts.”

SPLUT! SPLUT!

A last wave of nausea spread through me, and I knew it was done. The spikes on her shoes met with the mud on the other side of my sac. My two balls were now many chunks, and as she ground her heel into my mess of a scrotum, I felt them transform into a fine mush. The all-female crowd cheered.

My cock stayed rock hard the whole time.

————-

I woke up, in the usual sweat. This dream was so real, I could swear I actually could feel bruises on my nuts. Then I realized, I hadn’t finished healing after last week’s “session” with Karen. I squeezed my sac, making sure they were simply bruised and not broken. Surprisingly, my erection hadn’t been part of the dream. It was as hard as it had been during therapy. I realized I hadn’t masturbated since then, due to the pain. I started stroking gently, thinking about the soccer girl’s knockers. But something felt off. It felt…different.

I went to the bathroom and took a look. There was no way this was my imagination. My dick had shrank! I rushed to my desk and grabbed a ruler.

4.5 inches. My dream was right. I needed to go back to Karen and ask what the fuck was happening. Surely this couldn’t be unrelated to the castration anxiety.

———-

“So, any dreams this week?”
I laid on her couch again, naked as the day I was born. This time, she had me strip as soon as I came in. Something about familiarizing my body with a feminine space or some psychobabble.

I noticed this week there were some kind of leather straps attached to the bottom and sides of the couch. I could only imagine what fresh hell she had in store for me.

“Just one, yesterday. Soccer girl with cleats.”

She shook her head. “That doesn’t sound so fun. Did she leave anything in there this time, or was it another total castration?”
“Not a thing.”

She shook her head. “Were you aroused this time?”

I nodded my head slowly. How could she possibly have known that?

“I understand if you’re embarrassed. It’s a common side effect of the pills I gave you. In addition to the reduction in the frequency of the dreams, they make them more…pleasurable.”

Oh yeah. Maybe those damn pills were to blame for my smaller dick.

“Did those pills have any…other side effects?”

Her gaze shifted down to my shrunken cock. Soft at the moment, it barely stood out; I could practically feel it retract farther into me as she stared at it knowingly.

“I assume you’ve been experiencing some… shrinkage?”

I couldn’t bring myself to respond. The humiliation was too great.

“Rest assured, it’s purely temporary. In fact, there have been some reports that males can gain permanent growth after the treatment is complete, up to 1.5 inches above the original size.”

Hot damn! A whole inch and a half? I can’t wait to finish this therapy business.

She must have noticed my reaction. “I figured you’d be pleased. Normally, I don’t prescribe them due to…other issues, but I figured you need all the help you can get in that department.”

I couldn’t believe how blunt she was being. She noticed my offense and quickly changed her tune.

“I mean, from a purely medical standpoint of course. I’m sure the women you sleep with are very satisfied.”

I know she was trying to be professional, but it would have been nice if she had kept from smiling entirely on that last part.

“Anyway, you’re penis isn’t what’s giving us trouble here. We’ve got to focus on your balls again. I’m going to have to strap you in for today’s procedure.”

Before I could protest, she secured the leather straps around my ankles and wrists. I was spread apart, my swollen sack cushioning my shriveled dick, the whole package resting on the cool leather of the couch.

“Today, I figured I’d try making it a little more real.”

“How much realer can it get than jamming your fingers halfway through my nuts?!”

She looked down at me sternly. “You men always exaggerate. I was barely touching them. Anyway, I got my farmhand friend to lend me a little…equipment this week.”

She brought out a massive, metal tool. I would call them pliers, but the end was too broad. I hadn’t been on a farm, but I recognized a castration tool when I saw one. She was going to do it for real. I was going to lose my nuts! I started struggling, trying to get away from this crazy bitch.

“Now now, those restraints aren’t going anywhere. And like I said, I’m not cutting your nuts off for real! You really need to separate fantasy from reality here.”

“In order to show you how fantastical a castration really is, I’m going to get as close to castrating you as possible. I will include verbal enhancement and pressure from the burdizzo, as well as the same testicular pressures and impacts from last week, although with a greater intensity and frequency.”

Not a single word of that sounded remotely pleasant.

“Oh, one last thing.”

She pulled out a ballgag and gagged me. “I know you know this is fake, but you may feel some mild terror at times. Try to keep calm; this will keep you quiet.”

She smiled wickedly. “Now, are you ready for me to cut your balls off?”

She positioned the burdizzo around the top of my sac, squeezing gently enough not to crush anything, but hard enough that I could feel the circulation running out of my nuts.

“Feel those little strings attaching your nuts to your body? Those are called your spermatic cords. The burdizzo is meant to snip them right off. This would be the first time you’re castrated without having your balls converted to a mushy soup first.”

She laughed. “Of course, that’s assuming I DON”T convert them to soup.”

She let go of the horrible thing with one of her hands, and swung her first hard into my nuts. She left the burdizzo clamped around my balls, so they had nowhere to go but into it. I felt them flatten against the hard metal, and then the pain hit me. Tears welled up, and I realized her fist hadn’t left my sac. She was driving it deeper and deeper into my nuts.

Usually, I kept my eyes glued on her chest and ass during therapy. So I guess I never noticed the large, pointy ring on her left ring finger.
I noticed now.

I screamed as loud as I could into the gag. There is no way she was faking this. This was not “Verbal enhancement”. I was not walking out of here the same gender I came in.

Just before I was sure the ring was going to punch through my right nut, she removed her hand. I could feel the indent left on the bottom side of my sac.

“Maybe you deserve a little treat before you lose these little boys forever.”

She smiled that smile again.

“And I do mean little. How often do you get laid anyway? I’m surprised none of the girls you’ve slept with have crushed your tiny balls just for trying to stick your dick in them.”

“But anyway, looks like your sac is pretty full. Maybe I could empty it before I ruin it?”

Was this still part of the roleplay? What the hell was going on? What did this have to do with my nightmares?

Before I could answer, I turned my head over to see the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen. Karen had taken her shirt off, and was in the process of removing her bra.

She saw the look on my face, and looked down at my rock-hard cock. “I assume you haven’t been able to masturbate all week after the beating from last Wednesday. Hopefully that means this will go quick. This is just a final orgasm, nothing more. We’re not doing this for your pleasure, after all. It just makes castration easier.”

“That doesn’t mean you have nothing to look forward to, of course. My ex did say I gave fantastic blowjobs.”

Oh my god oh my god. I don’t care if this was for roleplay or whatever, this was the hottest thing that had ever happened to me. She was right about my sex life; my dick may not have been ultra tiny, but I sure as hell wasn’t any good with it.

And it didn’t help that I couldn’t last very…
Last very long in…uh…

Oh god….

Cum sprayed everywhere, before Karen even finished taking off her bra. My dick shot its huge, week-long backlog. The couch, burdizzo, and my chest were covered in my spunk.
Maybe that was it. Maybe the therapy was just making me cum, and we’re done now. I looked at her, hopeful that she would remove the tool constricting my manhood.

Then I saw her face.

“Well, that makes my job easier. At least you managed to miss me.”
She smiled.

“And I would have swallowed to.”

My cock managed a final spurt, hitting the one spot on my belly not covered in manjuice.

“I hope you enjoyed that at much as I enjoyed avoiding it. Say goodbye to your precious balls now.”
She stood up, strapping her bra on before I even got a glimpse of nipple. The burdizzo clamped down again, this time harder than before. I could feel my cords being crushed. My mind screamed in pain as my manhood swelled up.

She stood over me, her high heel pinning my right nut down. High heel?! What kind of therapist wears those?

“I see you’ve taken an interest in my heels. Wore them just for you. How else am I supposed to puncture through the strong Tunica albuginea?”
What the hell was she saying? Was that Latin? It didn’t matter.
The pressure on my nut increased. Had I been more lucid, I would have noticed that the tip of her heel coincided with the indentation left by her ring. I would have figured out that, although my nut could withstand either of those forces, there is no way it could have taken them in rapid succession in the same spot. Unfortunately, I didn’t manage to figure that out before she put all her weight onto the testicle.
Even more unfortunately, neither did she.
In my dreams, ruptured testicles happened instantaneously. One minute I was a man, and the next minute only half of one. As her heel skewered my nut, I realized how long a real rupture takes. I could feel the tip going all the way through my poor testicle, and coming out the other side. I saw the expression on her face change from malice to surprise as she realized what she had done.

“OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! THAT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!”

Her mouth formed the perfect “O” in surprise, the same O that had been promised for the most heavenly blowjob. She unstrapped me and removed the ballgag for my mouth, before pulling her phone out and rapidly dialing 911.

In all the pain and terror, I hardly noticed the burdizzo was still clamped around my nuts. I guess there must be some sort of lock or something. Why would someone invent such a cruel device? I feebly batted at it, in an attempt to remove it before my last nut died.

My last nut. That’s all I have now. Just one. Maybe the doctors could fix righty? But even before I thought it, I knew it to be a lie.

Karen saw what I was doing and unhooked the burdizzo. Blood flowed through my crushed right cord, filling up my sac. I lay on the ground, clutching my good ball and the remains of the other.

Karen looked down at me. The shock and horror was gone from her face, and she looked strangely calm, albeit puzzled. “Crushing your ball was supposed to knock you out instantly..,”

A kick connected with my ruined ball. I guess it hadn’t been entirely soup before, because I felt its remains disintegrate in front of her high heel.

Finally, unconsciousness took me.

————
I awoke in a hospital bed. A cute Asian nurse walked in, and a smile broke out on her face as she saw me gain consciousness.

“Look who finally woke up. Do you know the details of your injury yet?”

I tried thinking back…I remember being tied down, a false promise of a blowjob, a ruined opportunity…then, nothing.

“I can’t remember anything. Last I remember was going to a therapy session with Karen…Did she bruise my nuts? What happened?”

The nurse giggled. I’ve never seen an Asian with a rack like that. Her neckline was strangely low too, like she had unbuttoned it on purpose. I could see the top of some massive cleavage peeking out, teasing me. My dick managed a chubby. I took that as a good sign.

“Your remaining testicle is certainly bruised. The right one was crushed completely. We’ve finished removing it and the spermatic cords.”

Oh god…

“You’re still technically a man, but you should be more careful with your remaining nut. Were it to break, you would no longer be able to father children.”

“In addition, with the loss of a testicle, your testosterone production has decreased.”

The smile returned. “What that means is you may find a reduction of size in certain…key regions.”

She didn’t need to elaborate. My dick was getting even smaller. I just hoped the gain from the pills would counteract it.

“Now, let’s see if you can manage an erection for me.”

Without so much as asking my permission, she lifted my hospital gown up and bent over to look at my junk. I could now see down her whole uniform, and her breasts were even more amazing than I imagined. My dick went rock hard.

Then she asked the worst question any man could hear.

“Is..,it fully erect yet?”

I nearly died of embarrassment. Glancing down, I realized I had shrank even more in the short time since my therapy.

“…yes.”

She giggled. “I see.”

She marked something down on her clipboard and walked off, leaving the door open and my half-empty sac exposed to anyone walking down the hall.

A short time later, Karen came to visit. She brought a bouquet.

“I’m SOOOOOOO sorry! Can you ever forgive me?”

She sat down on the chair next to my bed, her breasts tantalizingly exposed.

“No man deserves what happened to you. I’ll make sure you get the very best treatment from now on.”

Despite the circumstances, my cock went rock-hard. She didn’t fail to notice, and gave me a playful smile.

“You know, during the session, I wasn’t lying about the blowjob. Orgasms given by females can help reduce a male’s castration anxiety. I would have really given you one.”

She sighed. “Of course, circumstances prevented it…But who’s to say I can’t make up the favor now?”

In my private moments, I had often thought about how much I would give for a blowjob from Karen. Never had I imagined I would literally give my right nut.

“Let’s get a little privacy, shall we?” She closed the door quietly.

My cock was so rock-hard, it felt like it had gained back a bit of what it had lost. As she bent over to reach my cock, I felt shivers run down my back. Whoever her ex was, he sure was a lucky man. My now-shrunk dick did have one upside: any girl could deep throat me with ease.

With the week’s worth of cum drained, I managed to last a little longer this time. But before too long, I felt that familiar rising, deep within my remaining nut. I was going to cum… oh god….

Footsteps came from down the hall. Karen shot off my dick, a millisecond too soon. The door opened, and the nurse from before was greeted my rock-hard, angry purple, still moist dick, standing a solid 4” above my solitary, deep blue ball.

“You’re free to go, Jeremy. I suggest wearing a cup for the next few weeks, as your left testicle is still fairly bruised and subject to rupture. In addition, please try to refrain from orgasm if possible. A buildup of semen can stimulate the production of testosterone.”

She smiled at my meager manhood. “And you’re really going to need as much of that as you can get.”

I had never been this close to orgasm before for so long. That single smile, and her jutting, soft breasts, were just enough to set me off. I erupted everywhere, my second ruined orgasm. The nurse smiled viciously as I covered myself with milky semen, while Karen looked on in horror.

The nurse waited until I finished to continue talking. “I’ll take care of this mess. Please try to be careful.” She grabbed my solitary ball, rolling it around in the palm of her hand. “Let’s just make one last check for ruptures.” Her small finger prodded into the back and top of my ball, and I grimaced as she found the bruises Karen had left. “We wouldn’t want you losing this one as well.” She let go of it with an unnecessarily vicious yank downwards, and it felt like it was being ripped out by its roots.

“It’s all you have left.”

——–

“No! Aim lower!”

The fencing coach was guiding my opponent, a girl several years my junior. The score was 4-0, my favor, and she clearly needed some help. I didn’t bother listening because I figured I would get the last point with the same ease I scored the first 4.

“En guarde. Ready, Fence!”

She lunged towards me. I parried across, but her blade went lower than usual. She had finally landed a hit.

I looked to see if it was on target.

Her foil was pinned to my right nut. She’s obviously scored, why won’t she move it?

Suddenly, the pain cleared my mind of all these thoughts. I collapsed to the ground, clutching my dear nut for all I was worth. I needed ice. I needed a hospital.

The judge, a cute asian with large tits, bent over me. “Righty’s gone. All you have left is the left one.”

What? It was just one hit. But feeling around my sac, I realized she was right. Through the pain, I realized my right cords ended only in mush. I began to cry.

“Stand back, I’m a nurse.” The judge bent over and grabbed ahold of my sack. “It’s not completely mush, and they might be able to save it if you go in 15, 20 minutes tops.”

I headed for the door, when I felt a hand grab my already-mangled sac and pull it backwards.

“Where do you think you are going? 1 point to opponent. Good hit, keep it up Jenny.”

“I…need to go to the hospital.”

“The bout’s almost over. You can manage.”

I couldn’t believe her cruelty. Her smile was so familiar. Her tits were nearly popping out. What kind of judge wears that uniform?

I hobbled back to the starting line, hoping to god that I would get this last point quickly.

“Ready, fence!”

Of course, she lunged again. This time, I couldn’t even attempt to block. The nutpain racked my entire body.

I felt the blade land, on the only place it could. My left nut took the brunt of the blow, as my right nut disintegrated fully.
POP!

This one was loud. The judge didn’t even need to manhandle me to tell that I was now a eunuch.

“Good point, jenny. Jeremy, you get a black card for bad sportsmanship. It’s unacceptable to crumple on the ground after every point. Jenny, you win! Jeremy, let’s call you an ambulance and finish this sex change.”

I lay on the ground, holding what used to be my sex organs. I hardly even noticed when the judge/nurse kicked my legs apart to stomp on them, finishing the job Jenny had started.
————————————————————————

Another nightmare, of course. I woke up and felt my rockhard cock, now a mere 3.5 inches. I couldn’t wait for these pills to wear off.

But something else was up. My shorts were soaked. Feeling around, I realized I had jizzed all over myself again. I remember bitterly the nurse’s words about testosterone, and how I should avoid orgasm, before drifting off to sleep.

————————————————————————

Wednesday evening. I had stripped as soon as I walked into Karen’s office, even though she didn’t ask me to. It just felt natural.

“Have the nightmares gone away yet?” she inquired hopefully. When I relayed her the tale of the particularly cruel fencing instructor, she look crestfallen.

“Did you have both of your balls in the dream? Before they were ruptured, of course.”

“yeah.”

She laughed. “That must have been nice. Having your other ball back, even if it was only a dream.”

“I guess…It was incredibly painful as usual. There wasn’t much to enjoy about it.”

She returned to her previous stern expression.

“I can’t believe it…That last session should have cured you…”

“Maybe…the rupture ruined the therapy? You weren’t expecting it to happen, right?”

She bit her lip. She wasn’t telling me something.

“You…didn’t meant to pop it, right?”

“Not right then. But I mean…I definitely had to rupture it at some point.”

WHAT?!

“That’s the only way to permanently cure castration anxiety! Get you to the brink of castration. It really makes you grateful for your remaining nut!”

I felt like I was sinking. How could she do this to me?
“So…you popped my nut on purpose?”

“I got a little caught up in the role playing. It was early; usually the popping follows weeks of bruising and kneeing and kicking and whatnot.”

At this point, I’m almost glad she took my nut so early.

“But…there is one other option…”

I listened meekly, still barely grasping the reality of the situation. Karen had purposely driven her heel into my nut hard enough to rupture it. She had made me half a eunuch. How many other men has she half-castrated?

“During your dream last night, you were aroused again?”

I nodded.

“Did you happen to ejaculate during your arousal? I know you have…problems with ejaculation.”

I nodded again. I was hardly even embarrassed of my sexual failings at this point; Karen was used to them.

“I have an idea!”

“As long as it keeps my other nut intact, I’m game for any-“

OOF.

Her knee connected with my ball. How she came off her chair and onto the couch so fast, I’ll never know.

This knee was somehow even more vicious than any from the weeks before. I could literally feel my nut deform beneath her weight, as she pressed it into the couch.

“I’ve been misdiagnosing you all along!”

A fist connected with my sole nugget of manhood, flattening it against the couch beneath.

“You don’t have castration anxiety at all! You have castration anticipation!”

A heel stomped into my mostly-empty sac, and my ball swelled up to fill the space left by its missing brother.

“It’s much rarer. You see, in some men, the psychoanalytical signals are mixed. Rather than being scared of castration, you desire it!”

I tried to explain to her that I most certainly did not desire such a thing, but it’s hard to form words when a

OOF

Another sharp toe jabbed into my ball. I was crying openly, and lay in the fetal position on the floor. Karen stood above me, looking down. From my vantage point, I could see up her skirt, and realized that she was wearing no underwear.

My dick stood rock hard.

“See? Even now, as you know that I’m going to crush your nut, you’re erect! You’ve been wanting this!”

I managed to get to my feet and run to the door. Forget my clothes. This is insane. I don’t want to lose my nut. It’s all I have.

It was locked.

I felt a familiar tug from behind. Karen had my ball in a vice grip, and was pulling with all her might. I couldn’t believe this was happening again.

SMUSH

Her knee came between my buttcheeks, and slammed all of my manhood back up into me.

“You won’t have to worry about your dick anymore either. With your balls gone, sex won’t be an option.”

THUD

Her toe connected with bone. My ball had really gone up inside of me, and gotten trapped. I could feel it swelling against the inside of my inguinal canal. It was going to pop. My own body was going to pop my last ball.

“Oh no you don’t. I’m getting this one.”

She laid me down. I had no control of my body at this point. Once again, my mind had been reduced to a numb nexus of pain.

Her heel stomped on my nut as hard as she could with her heel, leaving a mark on my belly where my nut was hidden. Three more times her foot descended over my hidden testicle, and three more times I experienced more agony than most men feel in their entire lifetime. Finally, the ball popped out, twice as large as it went in.

I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted this over.

“Why cant…you just….cut it off? You have a burdizzo.”

She paused for a minute. “Y’know, I bet that would be just as effective…”

Mercy. Finally.

“But this is really so much more fun. You think I haven’t noticed you looked up and down my clothes every chance you get?”

I was truly fucked.

SLAM

SLAM

SPLAT

SQUIIIIISHH

My nut gave way to mush, and her heel connected with the floor. A geyser of semen erupted out of my now-useless dick, and I thought back to that blowjob I never got. And never will. My penis lost its last erection, and Karen stood over me. I could see her pussy perfectly now, as her skirt was off. She was rubbing away furiously, like it was the last orgasm she would ever have.

Last orgasm ever. Like she would know what that’s like…

I lay on the floor, crying in pain as she cried out in pleasure to her first orgasm.

“I…castrated you. For real. You’ll never have sex again….”

Another orgasm gripped her, and I passed out.

——————————————————————————

I awoke in a familiar hospital, greeted by a familiar face. My gown was already lifted up, leaving what was left of my genitals visible to anyone once again.

“What a surprise, Mr. Jeremy. It looks like you didn’t bother getting a cup.”

That goddamn nurse again.

“It’s much too late now, of course. Both your testicles are irreparably damaged. You will never have children.”
She giggled like this was the funniest thing she’d ever heard.

“Of course, you can adopt. Or pay a real man to fuck your wife. But your genetic line has ended.”

“Not that that little worm would have passed much on to begin with. I’d be surprised if a peashooter like that could even clear the barrel, if you know what I mean.”

She laughed again. “I’m so glad we can joke about it, now that both of your nuts are gone. After all, you can hardly be sensitive about how small it is, now that it’s totally useless.”

She straightened up. “Of course, I’m exaggerating. Many ‘men’ go on to live long and healthy sex lives after losing their nuts! You’re going to need your therapist to write you a prescription for testosterone though. It will allow you to still have erections and orgasms, even if they’re completely pointless.”

I perked up. I didn’t know about that at all!

“Assuming you want to keep your penis, that it. Many men have a full penectomy after sustaining…your type of injury.”

“What? Why would I want that?”

“It’s just…less hassle. Like I said, your penis is…quite small. I frankly don’t see the point keeping it. It’s hardly aesthetically pleasing.”

This was humiliating.

“Yes, I would like to keep my penis. Can I go yet? I need to go talk to my therapist.”

The nurse continued staring at my dick. It really was small now, but it looked a little bigger without my nuts dwarfing it for once.

“Yeah, you can go. No stitched to worry about now, since your whole sack is gone.”
—–

A week went by. No nightmares for once.
—–

I go into Karen’s office. I stay clothed now, and explain to her the situation.

“So I think my castration disorder, whatever it was, is cured. All I need is for you to write me a prescription for testosterone so I can have my sex life back, and we’re done.”

I couldn’t believe I was talking civilly to the woman who had unmanned me. I guess I was thankful, in a way. After all, she had cured me, and if I could still have sex, what more could I want?

She looked up at me, mystified. “Why would you possibly need that prescription for?”

“To…so I can still be a man.”

“Jeremy, you’re no more a man now than I am, and you never will be.”

This was not going well.

“Your desire for castration won’t be fulfilled if you can still have sex and get erections. It’s not about losing your testicles. It’s about losing your manhood. It needs to be permanent. I’m sorry, but I cannot in good conscious approve of something that will bring back a disorder we spent so long curing.”

“But…I’ll be a eunuch…”

“You ARE a eunuch. Look at you! The only piece of your manhood left is that penis.”

She smirked. “And let’s face it, there’s not much left of that after the penis-shrinking pills I gave you.”

“What…”

“You really think there’s a functional drug on the market that grows your dick an inch and a half? Get real. That loss is permanent, just like your balls. I’ll write a recommendation for a penectomy, but that’s the only thing you’ll get from me.”

——————————————
I refused the penectomy. I tried to hang onto the tiny scrap of manhood I had left, but it was shrinking away from me. Literally. Without my balls, my penis shrank to a thimble sized bump above my castration scar. I have to sit down to pee now, and the thought of sex is a long-lost dream.

The castration dreams come back occasionally. I’m thankful when I get them. They’re the only time I can be a man, even if it’s for a short time.
—————————————-

Feedback? I’ve been reading stories on here for a long time, and finally wanted to try my own. I wrote all of this today, and haven’t really edited it or anything, so sorry it got so long, and for grammar errors and stuff.


Is it weird to jack off to your own stuff?

Demon Game

Dean x Reader

Reader is trapped in the bunker with Demon Dean. Dean chases the reader and it ends with a game. 

Warning: Smut, fluff, sexual tension

Tags: @iamascreamermakememute 

Dean is a demon.

Never in my life would I even think that this would be possible. How could it? Dean was always on the other side, the good side. But here I am, in the bunker, chased by a very demon Dean. If I loved him so much, I would gladly kill him. But to kill Dean, is to kill myself and that was not going to happen.

Honestly, this would never have happened if Sam had not gone out to find our dear Castiel. So yes, I am stuck in the bunker with Dean chasing me down. If he was not hellbent on killing me, I would be very turned on by it.

“Baby! I know you can hear me. Come play with me!” Dean yells.

I keep silent because answering would give away my location but somehow, I felt compelled to reply.

“Dean, you don’t want to do this! Please, we can talk this out.” I yelled back.

Right after yelling I ran away from where I was. The hallways were like the streets of New York City. It is like a never-ending maze. But Dean knew the place and I did not.

“Baby, don’t you know how much I have missed you, your kisses, and your touch?” Dean replies. He sounded like an abandoned puppy.

“Like hell I would kiss you now!” I yelled back at him.

“Ninety-eight days! That is the number of days since we had sweet sex.” Dean said.

That was true. Ninety-eight long days of brutal sexual frustration. I had to admit, I was and still am very addicted to Dean. He was my first and probably will be my last if he managed to track me down. The “Mark of Cain” has made Dean a demon. Besides that, it also gave him incredible strength. I knew that I would be overpowered easily if he managed to catch me. But I was curious of his change since Sam forbid me to see him.

Oh, did I also mention that I have not seen him for the past ninety-eight days? It is true. I was yearning to be in his arms and to tell him that I still loved him even with his black eyes.

“I still love you, you know that? I am doing this to protect you Dean!” I yelled.

“I love you too baby, why are you running away from me?” Dean replies.

“Sam said that you are dangerous and that you would try to kill me!” I yelled back.

“Really? You would trust Sam over me? I thought that you trusted me with all your being? Wasn’t that your promise to me? Remember the witch hunt in Idaho?” Dean asks.

I remember that day like it was yesterday.

*Flashback

We had finally finished the job and were in the motel room. I was in the shower when Dean barges in and kissed me. I struggled, initially. Then I gave in.

“Don’t ever make me worry about you like that again” Dean pleaded.

“I’m sorry. I will never do that again.” I said.

“Good, now let’s finish showering and get back to bed.” he said.

“Together?” I asked.

Dean pulled back from me, got out of the shower and started taking off his wet clothes. I turned away. A part of me was excited and the other part was scared. I had never been naked with anyone, let alone a man in a shower before. This was all new to me. The next thing I knew; Dean was in the shower with me. He squirted some soap into his hands and started washing my back. I jumped as I felt a chill run down my spine.

“Relax, do you trust me?” he asked.

“I do, but I just…”

“I know it is your first time and you are scared. But just trust me, you are in good hands. Alright?” he asks.

“Alright. I trust you.” I said.

Dean then pries my hands off of my chest where they were tightly secured. I turned around to face him. Now, I am completely naked in the shower with Dean. I felt so vulnerable, yet secure. Dean then takes more soap and lathers it on my body, his eyes never leaving mine. He started with my back, my hands, my legs, then my breasts. I whimper at that sensation. Dean’s mouth curls up at the side. He was enjoying this. He spent the longest time making sure my breasts were thoroughly lathered up with soap. He took my nipples and rolled it between his fingers. My legs felt like jelly, my moans were getting louder, and my eyes were rolling back into my head.

Dean then lowered his hands onto my belly and tickled me. I laughed and swatted his arm. He laughed and his face lit up. But that only lasted for a few seconds. Then his face becomes serious. At that moment, I felt his fingers in my most intimate area. He slowly caressed my lower lips, tracing circles. His movements were soft but sure. He knew what he was doing to me. My breath labored as he continued to play with my lips. As time went by, his movements became faster and more erratic. The suddenly, I felt his fingers enter me. I let out a soft scream of pain and pleasure.

Dean then nudged my leg. I looked at him, annoyed that he had stopped. I wanted more.

“Put your legs on the seat.” he orders.

I obeyed and lifted my leg and placed it on the bathroom seat. Then, I felt his fingers entering me again but this time, he moved it in and out at a slow pace. Dean eyes was still locked to mine. I felt embarrassed so I looked away. Then his fingers stopped moving.

“Why did you stop? Don’t stop!” I begged.

“Then look at me!” he ordered.

I locked my eyes to his. He started moving again. This time, he was faster and more aggressive. Every stroke hit the same spot in me, the right spot. I could feel something building in me. It was as if I was about to explode. His fingers moved faster and faster. I moaned louder and louder. Then, it happened. I came hard on his fingers. My eyes rolled back into my head, my back arched, and my body tensed. I have never felt like this before. It is as though a star had burst in my body. I saw stars.

I was out of this world. I don’t remember how long it lasted but when I came back to reality, I realised that Dean was holding me tight and my feet were no longer on the floor. I looked at Dean and he had that smug smile on his face. That smile that emerged after a he had killed something evil. But this was something else. He had breathed life into me.

“Do you still trust me?” he asked.

“Yes, I do. Now and forever.” I said.

“Promise?” he asks.

“I promise.” I said.

*Flashback ends

“I remember.” I yelled.

There was no answer; I wondered why. Then I turned around and there he was. Dean was right behind me. He looked different. His face sharper, more rugged, and more handsome. His eyes were black, like his soul, if he had a soul.

“I am happy to know that you remembered.” he said.

Then Dean knocked me out with a punch to my neck.

I woke up with a headache. I looked around and realised that I was in Dean’s room. The next thing I realised is that the alarm and red lights meant that there was a lockdown. I immediately sat up straight and tried to leave the bed but something was holding me there. I was handcuffed to the bedpost. I tried to break free from them but obviously it did not work. Not even the King of Hell could break free from them.

“Sam!! HELP!! Anyone?” I yelled.

For a minute I wondered if Sam had come back in time to stop Dean. The lockdown would have made a lot of sense. That meant that Dean could not leave.

The door then flung open. Dean entered with nothing but his jeans. My worst nightmare came true. If Dean was in the bunker and there is a lockdown, that means no one from the outside could come in. Specifically, Sam and whoever could not come in to save me. But was I in need of saving?

Dean walked over to the bed. His face was hard. It was as though he was a predator stalking its prey. He came to the edge of the bed and started to climb on the bed. I instinctively move back. It wasn’t long till I ran out of place to hide. Dean crawled over me. His face was inches away from mine. His eyes did not give away his emotions. They were black and empty.

With no warning, Dean kissed me hard on the lips. One hand behind my head and the other on my neck. His kiss was fierce, intense and forceful. I tried to pull away but his hand on my head kept me in place. I refused to reciprocate. I just kept still while he devoured my lips. Soon enough, he pulled away.

“Don’t worry, that was plan A. There are 25 more letters in the alphabet. I am not giving up until I get what I want.” Dean said. He moved fast this time. The next thing I knew, my shirt was torn off. I wish I had worn a bra before running away from my room. I guess this was his plan B, literally.

“Stop! What do you want? Just tell me what do you want?” I asked. I was tempted to play his game, but I will only do it on my terms.

“I want you.” Dean said. His face was inches away from mine. I could feel his breath on my skin. His eyes was burning a hole through my face.

“No.” I answered. I kept a straight face knowing well that my answer would set the game on my terms. I was determined to win this game.

Immediately, Dean’s lips were on my neck. He sucked hard, leaving marks on my skin. He was territorial. He wanted everyone, including me, to know who I belong to. He pushed me down flat on the bed as he kissed his way down to my breasts. He took his time, sucking each nipple until they were hard. His hands had a mind of it’s own. His left hand, grasping my neck while his right at my core. My head was in the clouds. I could feel the pressure building from inside of me. Both his hands and lips were working in tandem leaving me helpless. It wasn’t too long until he pushed me over the edge. Dean one, Y/N zero. I was losing in my own game.  

Before I could even recover from the first orgasm, I felt his manhood teasing me. I opened my eyes and took a peek. Demon Dean was huge. I was both excited and scared. I tried to move away but Dean’s strong hands held my hips in place. He bent down and gave me a sweet kiss on my lips.

“Shh, don’t worry. It won’t hurt, much.” Dean said. Barely a second later, he pushed his manhood into me in one movement. There was just the right amount of pain and pleasure. My hands grabbed the sheets as I yell out in pleasure. He stayed in there for a while. The anticipation was killing me. I just wanted him to move. I looked up at him and saw him smirking. I tried moving my hips to get some action but Dean stopped me. I was certain there will be handprints on either side of my hips.

“Please! Dean!” I pleaded. I was desperate. I needed to feel him move inside me. I needed release. This was going to cost me but I could not be bothered about that now.

“Please what?” Dean asks. His voice was calm. I underestimated him. He was obviously on top of the game. He hated losing, especially in this department.

“Make love to me, please,” I begged. Dean smiles.

“Game over.” Dean says as he pulls out and thrusts into me hard.

He was taking hard and fast. He hits the right spot with every thrust. The noise of our skin slapping each other could be heard from miles away. Dean was grunting harder with every thrust. It didn’t take long before he started to thrust harder and faster, which I thought was impossible. This was the point of no return. I came hard, my legs were shaking, my back arched and my eyes rolled back. My orgasm lasted for eternity.

When I came back to reality, Dean was standing naked on the edge of the bed. He looked like he had just won a nobel prize. I sat upright and realized that I was no longer cuffed to the bed. Did he want me to leave? I looked at him questioningly.

“I think, I’ll keep you, pumpkin.” Dean said.

“I think I’ll keep you too, my demon.” I replied.

Isak giggled and pushed Even’s hands away

“you are so dorky” he grins, his world glowing as he watches Even twirling a yellow flower in the sunlight. 

Even smiles and pecks a soft kiss on Isak’s nose, his cheek, the bruise under his eye and then softly on his lips before brushing his fingers across Isak’s cheek. 

“only a dork for you my love” 

Isak’s heart is about to explode. He is so madly in love with this boy and his hands on his face, and the lips pressed against his neck, and the way his entire smile radiates warmth from Isak’s chest…

which is why when Even places the little yellow flower behind Isak’s ear…Isak lets him. 

he pulls Even towards him by his hips and melts their lips together. 

the sun is shining upon them, and his hands are feeling the fragile intricate of Even’s shoulders and Even holds him close against his chest. 

“you look so beautiful baby” Even whispers in Isak’s neck causing him to turn into a a bright blushing pink giggling mess in his boyfriends arms

This is love,

this is beauty

this is Isak becoming a total flower prince softie for only one boy. 

The boy. 

his boy <3 

Cross Them Lines - Part 2

Summary: Reader and Chris Evans have been childhood best friends. She wakes up the next morning in his bed.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Part 1

A/N: I admit I am a very slow writer. For which, I do apologize. Anyway…I’ll do my best to get this fic out as much as I can. Your feedback is always welcome :)


I am not sure what it was exactly that woke me. I felt a little disoriented so I remained still until I could get my bearings.


I was covered up, all warm and cozy. My throat was dry and my head throbbed a little, clearly indicating I’d had a night of drinking. There was an arm wrapped around my waist. The palm rested on my bare stomach. Was I naked? I sneaked a peek and was very much relieved to find that I was not.


The body attached to the arm was happily spooning me. Ugh. Dave. But then I remembered. The blonde. The “accident.” I had broken up with him right after. Unless…unless I was too stupid for my own good and had actually gotten back together with him.


Cursing myself internally, I glanced around the bedroom, trying my damnest to decipher clues as much as my disoriented brain could manage. It was too uncluttered to be Dave’s bedroom. That dumbass would leave literally everything everywhere.


Chris.


This was Chris’s bedroom. I was being spooned by Chris’s warmth.

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