Here’s the long awaited video of Drunk Trek! I’m doing my best to retell a classic Star Trek episode while being completely wasted. To prepare, we played the Star Trek drinking game (drink every time kirk rips his shirt, every time a redshirt dies, every time there’s gay etc.), using the very episode that we’re going to explain later. Enjoy this mess!
So our group was on a quest to recur some kid’s cat and we’d found it on the opposite side of a river. As it was too deep to ford and too wide to cast any spells at the cat from the riverbank, the paladin waded out neck deep into the water, carrying me (the wizard) bridal style so I could Mage Hand this cat over to us without getting swept away by the current. This is when the following exchange took place.
DM: Once the cat is safely in your arms, you realize it’s not breathing.
Wizard: Gods. I. I think it’s dead.
Paladin: (looks at me, dead serious) Wizard. Boop me on the nose.
Paladin: Boop me on the nose with the dead cat.
Paladin: You’ll notice I’m not moving from this spot.
Wizard: (looks nervously around at the rushing water) Okay, okay fine, I’ll boop you with the cat.
Paladin: (to DM) Okay, I want to roll for Lay on Hands.
DM: Roll it, but take a -2 penalty.
Paladin: I Lay on Boop the cat! (rolls)
Long story short, the paladin rolled ridiculously high, her Lay on Boop succeeded, the cat woke up and freaked out, and we barely managed to make it safely to shore.