my room is full of pineapples

So I used to work for a grocery store, in the produce department part time. There were 4 other employees other than myself. My manager, B, the assistant manager, D, our resident salad bar and team mom with one hand, with the same name as D, and S, who was a college student working part time and ready to graduate with a degree in soil??? Anyway.
So one Tuesday I come in, and there is a green potato with a face carved into it, on top of the shelf wearing a mushroom hat pinned to his head w/a toothpick and shriveled carrot arms.
Turns out S got really bored and thought it would be funny to carve a face into the potato and turn him into some weird sculpture.
He even found a dowel-rod and put him on a stick and then stuck him in a corner above the over-wrapper.
As every day went on more and more things were added to the new produce idol. He was given a grass-skirt of pineapple leaves, jalapeno legs, a coconut hat to cover his shrivelled mushroomcap, and then a paper penguin mask.
This went on for two full weeks and one day I came in to find that our potatofriend had gone missing. I didn’t ask about it but I went into my tiny back-room to do the salad bar. It was at the end of the day when I was mopping the floor that there was a cloth over something the back corner. The potato was lodged in the back corner hidden from everyone.
It stayed in our back-room for two months (and in case anyone is curious, all the things that were on the potato don’t really decay in the grossest manner, they just kind of shrivel up and get old and wrinkly or green and grow extra whatever) before there was another visit from the district and they made us throw him out.

Needless to say it was not the last time we made a sculpture out of things we found that were trash/bad.

Beach Getaway

BLSummer bingo! Popsicles where they shouldn’t be, sunburns, and sand in uncomfortable places

Jackothy, T rated <3

Tim wished he could actually enjoy having a rich boyfriend. He’d started from gold digging Jack to actually digging him, realizing he liked Jack’s company and affection outside of his job.

That was the problem- he only wanted Jack outside of work, but work had taken over his life. Jack worked on average 14 hour days and Tim didn’t do much better. Any time at home together they were typically too tired to enjoy each other. Jack sometimes broke down and had late night parties with all sorts of substances to escape the stress, but Tim never went.

He tiredly unlocked the door and walked in at 2 AM after having too much work to do keeping an eye on Helios and Elpis and taking out a would-be assassin. Jack snored loudly on the couch and Tim frowned, feet and body aching and a lump in his throat. “Saved your life,” he muttered, tossing his identical grey jacket on the floor and working on his waistcoat, noticing a bottle of tequila next to Jack and throwing his coat at it. “Can’t even kiss me goodnight.”

Tim knew he had to take action.

The next morning Jack had his persona back on, spinning in his yellow chair with sunglasses on. If Tim didn’t know the glasses were to hide how hungover Jack was, he’d think them stylish. Tim strode in and Jack grinned at him. “Heard you did a pretty nice job last night, killin’ that scav assassin. What was his name, Taser Face? Sounds like if- if fuckin’ bandits were running out of email addresses! Oh no, badassbloodbath is taken, guess I better settle for taserface@fuckos.net!”

Jack jumped when Tim heavily clanked a bottle of rum on Jack’s desk. “I need a vacation, Jack. We need a vacation. Together.” Tim smiled, just thinking about what he wanted. “You and me, a sunny beach, lots of good drinks- what’s not to like?”

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Cameron Dallas Imagine : " Stuck" - Part 3

  Part 1 || Part 2 

A/N: I hope you like this part :D Send me requests if you want to, or ask me stuff or advice, also if you need help or someone to talk to you can talk to me, I’ll be glad to help <3

  I went back to my room after taking the boys to the beach. Cameron tried to take me out to eat pizza, but the only thing I said about that was “You must be crazy if you think I want to eat my dinner with a bunch of girls trying to kill me by stare!”, then I got up and made my way to the hotel.

  I changed clothes into a tank top and large sweats and spread all my collection papers in my bed and just stared at them. Those were all my designs for the collection, the ones that would be in my portfolio and would decide if I got in fashion design in college. As I stared at them and tried to realize what was missing when someone knocked on my door.

  I went to door and opened it carefully, after what had already happened that day I think it was natural for me to be afraid of someone getting in my room without me wanting them to.

  At my door was Cameron Dallas… again.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked looking at the corridor to see if there were any fans.

  “I brought pizza!” He said showing me the pizzas and smiling. I was really hungry though.

  “God! Come on in before anyone sees you.” I said pushing him in and shutting the door.

  I started collecting the papers in my bed but he already had his hands on one of them.

  “You busy?” He asked lifting it up. “These are pretty cool”

  I snatched the paper from his hand and made a smirk.

  “I was just working on these.  Nothing special.” I said putting them in the coffee table with my laptop.

  “Nothing special (Y\N)?” They are awesome!” He said sitting in my bed and suiting himself with a slice of pizza.

  “I still need to work on them, that’s all. If I want to get into Otis I need to be better.” I said sitting in front of him and watching the interrogative look in his face. “It’s a university of design” I explained myself.” But well, let’s not think about that, what do we have?” I asked with a smile.

  “We have pineapple with chicken and chicken and peperoni” He said with his mouth full and I took a slice. “I believe you’ll get in. Just so you know” He looked seriously at me.

  “Thank you Cameron” I said with a shy smile. He was actually so sweet; I didn’t imagine him like that.

  We had finished our pizzas; we actually managed to eat them all, and were just chilling in my room.

  “I’m going to your room to check on you. Katherine’s already asleep” Said the message Hannah sent me.

  “There’s no need for that. I’m fine you beautiful ass, go to sleep” I replied.

  “Don’t be a dog poo, I’m almost there.” She replied.

   I heard the knock on the door and pushed Cameron out of my bed throwing him to the floor.

  “(Y\N)? What the hell?” He shouted and pulled me out of the bed making me fall on him.

  “Shh, keep your voice down!” I whispered staring straight into his eyes.” Go hide in the balcony” I said getting up fast and helping him on his feet.

  I started pushing him to the balcony.

  “Why?” He stopped the door when I was about to close it.

  “It’s my best friend. She’s a huge fan and she will be so mad if she sees you here.” I said quickly and with a worried look “I didn’t tell her what happened today. Please don’t make noise” I begged him.

  “Okay, I won’t. Promise.” He pouted his pinky and I pouted mine and we intertwined them.

  “Thank you” I kissed him on the cheek and closed the door of the balcony running to the room’s door.

  “Jesus. What took you so long?” She asked as soon as I opened the door and hugged me.

  “I was in the bathroom. Sorry.” We got to the bed and the two pizza boxes were there.

  “Well you were hungry” She looked with smirk at me. “Okay, (Y\N), I’ve known your big ass for four years. Spear it out.”

  “Okay but don’t turn into a crazy ass bitch on me okay?”

  “Swearing on my love for the Hemsworth brothers.” She said doing the Hunger Games sign.

  “So I may have spent all this time with Cameron Dallas and some time with Nash Grier too.”

  Her mouth cracked open.

  “You know you’re the bitch of my heart but right now I want to kill you”

  “Ok, but before you do that” I raised my finger telling her to wait and went to the balcony’s door.

  “Cameron” I said and he looked at me with a smile. “There’s someone you should meet”

  He got in the room and I could see Hannah’s face turning red with excitement.

  “Try not to strangle him to death when you hug him” I said to her but she made no sound. “Cameron this is Hannah. I promise she’s not always this quite.”

  “Hi Hannah I’m Cameron” He said approaching her. She immediately hugged him and I just laughed.

  When they broke the hug Hannah took some steps back and looked at us side by side.

  “I can already tell something is going to happen between the two of you.” I blushed and looked at Cameron who was smiling. “I swear to you, you break her heart and I’ll break your neck. I don’t care who you are.” She said pointing a finger at him.

reginaoflocksley  asked:

are you still taking prompts? i'd love 16 + bellarke if you can :)

bellarke drabble, based on this gif:

the zombie!au that nobody asked for and has probably been done

Bellamy had always had a bit of a one track mind. Whatever he was focusing on at any given moment, nothing else could pull his attention from it. And right now, in this abandoned grocery store in the middle of nowhere, all he could think about was sex.

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the ideal time, but when the closest anyone had come to touching his dick in the months since the world had gone to complete shit was a roamer who tried to bite it off, it was hard not to find the hot blonde with the gun pointed at him a major turn on.

He was well aware of how ridiculous his current fantasy of pushing her against the empty freezers and feeling her back arch against him was, so shut up, okay?

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