my reason to exist

This is literally just Aleks fucking up an intro

“Last night, Danny saw his great friend Julie Katz for the first time in years. She starred in the NSP video “The Decision” and was the person who originally introduced him to Ninja Brian! She’s a fabulous lady! Here’s a picture from last night of her trying to feed Danny a giant chocolate dick!”

Awwww!  What a heart-warming reunion.  Well.  I mean.  Besides the HYEUGE chocolate penis.

six word stories

Aries
Screaming loud but nobody can hear

Taurus
I have no reason to apologise

Gemini
I’m not alone but I’m lonely

Cancer
The first time we held hands

Leo
But nobody knows the real me

Virgo
Tell me why I feel alone

Libra
Pretending to be someone I’m not

Scorpio
I care too much about everything

Sagittarius
I wish I had no regrets

Capricorn
I can’t let my walls crumble

Aquarius
Show me my reason for existence 

Pisces
I feel everything - it’s too much

Know that it is you - and only you.
It has always been you.
And it will continue to be you until the sun burns out and the stars fall from the sky and we’re all nothing but dust and memories.
You are my soulmate, my other half, as you were in the hundred lifetimes before this one and you will be in the hundred lifetimes to come.
You are my infinite… My universe…. The missing piece my soul aches for. You will never be lost to me… I will always find you and always love you, of that I am sure….
Because you are the one for me… You define my existence; you are my reason for being….
I begin and end with you.
The Signs as School Subjects

Aries: P.E. because they literally thrive off competition like what

Taurus: English because both are pretty chilled back unless you start throwing books around/at them

Gemini: Maths why is every single gemini good at maths ????? how ???? teach me your ways !!??

Cancer: Biology because cute plants and stuff yeah

Leo: Drama because literally every single Leo I’ve ever met is into musical theatre ????????? why ?????????

Virgo: History because they’re always telling you to learn from past mistakes yes okay i get it murdering people is morally wrong

Libra: Food because then they can use the actual scales to balance things aw cute omg

Scorpio: Chemistry because you think you’re doing fine with Chem or Scorpio and have everything under control and then they violently explode and suddenly your life is a mess hahhahahhaa :(

Sagittarius: Geography so they can learn about the world and know where to travel away from this mess of a country lmao bye 

Capricorn: German because both use long complicated words that I can’t say or understand for shit

Aquarius: Music because they’re just on completely different level from you like they read circles with tails according to position on lines and that’s magical

Pisces: Physics because NO ONE FUCKING UNDERSTANDS EITHER OF THEM