my poor roommate

Talking About Rhack Fanfics w. my Roommate
  • Me: So yeah, mostly they have a lot of sex on Jack's desk or up against that big window.
  • Roommate: You're all obsessed with that window.
  • Me: It's a nice window.
  • Roommate: Why don't they like, have sex on Buttstallion or something?
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...I'm putting this on tumblr as a prompt.

that post about phichit and yuuri with their hair combed back is all over my dash and i’m just sitting here like “please step on me and choke me with your glorious thighs, also feel free to take all my money and let me thank you profusely for it”


I didn’t figure out that Elsewhere University was anything other than a place filled with shivery-but-ultimately-harmless traditions until I’d already started my second year.

It wasn’t anything too exciting - I stumbled into the wrong part of the library, came out and realized I hadn’t missed my afternoon classes after all. I went to class, came back to my dorm room, had a panic attack, and went on with my life. Oh, and I changed my safename. I think I ended up going through half a dozen in the next few weeks, trying to find one that didn’t actually mean anything to me. (I remember Toucan was one of them, though I think I got anxious over what if it somehow offended the crows.) Sunny was the one I stuck with that year, mostly because my TA for Intro to Statistics sat me down and told me to just pick one so he’d know who to give the assignments back to.

I already knew most of the lore by then. I’d thought it was just fun bits of knowledge, traditions and legend-building, but I’ve always collected that kind of thing. After that initial panic (having made sure the horseshoe was securely over my doorway, and stuffed salt packets in all my pockets, and turned my underwear inside-out, and written and deleted several emails to my parents) I remembered that according to everything I heard, Bio majors didn’t usually interact much with the Fae. I’d actually been disappointed by that, back when it was just a story not quite close enough to touch, but it was a comfort now. So once I’d settled on my new safename (and stopped side-eying my poor roommate), I caught up with my assignments and moved on, just a little bit more careful than before.

I fell in love with lab work that year, and on the advice of a professor shifted into the tiny Molecular Biology concentration. Elsewhere University doesn’t do much research, but there’s lab space available for fourth years doing a thesis, and you can use it earlier if you have a Prof willing to supervise and sign off for you. The Molecular Genetics professor was full of ideas for what I could do with the reagents left behind in the fridge and one big freezer, and between us we managed to get me an internship the next summer, to stay and start on my own project.

I spent those months sharing a tiny apartment in the next town over with an English major going into her fourth year. (I don’t know why she was staying for the summer. I asked, but she gave me a different answer every time - she needed to hang teardrops on the rainbow, or count crow’s teeth, or find the door out of the laundry room. After a while, I stopped asking). In the mornings she’d drive us both into the university, and in the evenings I’d either wait for her in the library (always near the front) or I’d take the single late-night bus that ran from the university to the middle of town.

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anonymous asked:

I miss your nsfw art ;;

I would say that I miss it too but I, am in fact, drawing porn every day right now just no one else gets to see it but my poor belabored roommate 

But hopefully once I am done I can start doing more nsfw doodles again ;;

Imagine a nervous Yoongi fretting over Jin’s (already totally packed) bags, worrying about him leaving for the Jungle…. 

“You sure you have enough socks Jinnie, how many socks did you take, I only see 20 pairs here, you’ve gotta keep your feet dry remember that - that’s the most important part…” 

“Yoongi, you silly, I have another few stuffed in the corners there, It’ll be fine…”

“Ok, I know, but …how about sunscreen and medicine, that stuff you take for your stomach when you eat something that doesn’t agree with you, and you have headache medicine right, and - do you think you have room for this little first aid kit…”

“Gigi,…you know the crew will have first aid kits, I’m sure everything will be ok…”

“I’m just gonna miss you, Jinnie, gonna have to go cuddle with Namjoon if I get cold - get my head snored off..”

“I’m not gone yet gigi…you can cuddle with me now..”

And so he does.  

Life Tips for Uni

Do not take 8am classes: Plenty of studyblr’s will tell you that 8am’s aren’t that bad and with a bit of willpower you can make it. In my experience (as a person who thrives at night), 8am classes are useless. My brain is not prepared to learn that early, I do not pay attention and therefore it is a waste of my time (and money) to take a class at that time of day. 

Take classes based on how you learn: If you can sit through 3 hour lectures and maintain focus through the whole lecture, go for it. However, if you struggle with focus see if the class is available in a twice a week format. 

Do not schedule all your classes on one day: This was another first year mistake for me, I packed 3 lectures into one day. Sure seems like a good idea when you have 2 days off a week, but not when you have to try to focus through 9 hours of lectures with barely any time to eat. 

If you want to change your major: and this happens, make sure you talk with BOTH your student success office AND your program coordinator/the program coordinator of your new program. Failing to talk to the correct people can lead you to miss important information about classes/grades/other requirements. 

Try different styles of note taking: Everyone learns differently, I started first year typing my notes, which I quickly learned I could do without really listening or paying attention. I switched to taking my notes by hand and I found a complete change in my grades. Again, this is something different for everyone so whatever works best for you, but trying something new could be beneficial!

Get to know your profs: I know not all professors are necessarily the most approachable people, but making connections and getting to know your profs can only benefit you. You never know when you’ll need a last minute extension/letter of recommendation/help with a draft, and if they can put a face to a name they will be much more likely to help out. 

Go to class: This might seem obvious (and I am bad for this because I find I learn more from the textbook than I do in class), but going to class is important. You are paying for it after all. Even if you attend and only half-ass pay attention you might be surprised by what you remember when it comes to studying. 

Take notes: Do it. Take notes, and lots of them. I am a huge advocate of using slang/swear words to paraphrase what the prof is saying because that helps me remember.

Go to the library: Libraries are good places because they put you in the right mentality to get things done. But it’s important to find a study place that suits you. If the library is too quiet for you, try another building or a coffee shop!

Read your textbooks: As a law student, there is no way I would have passed my classes without doing the readings. Annotating textbooks and paraphrasing important concepts is a really good start so that when you get to exams you aren’t completely lost. Plus no one wants to catch up on 12 weeks worth of reading right before exams, trust me. 

Take advantage of available resources on campus: There are SO MANY resources available on university campuses for every possible thing, employment services, writing workshops, counselling etc. Do not be afraid to seek these services out because that is exactly what they are there for!

Organize yourself before the semester starts: Chances are on the first day of class you are already behind a week of readings. I like to organize my semester right away so I don’t get any farther behind. Personally, I need a large month calendar above my desk with my assignments on it so I can see when everything is due/ how much time I have. Write out your weekly readings, make sure you know when everything is due and make sure you organize your time during busy weeks!

Try not to procrastinate too hard: I am a serial procrastinator so this is something I still struggle with. The best advice I received about this was “commit to doing at least 5 minutes and chances are you will want to keep going”. Even if you don’t, thats 5 minutes more than you would have done! (Also keep in mind research ALWAYS takes more time than you think it will)

Learn how YOU study: This is another thing that is different for everyone, personally I have to talk through/teach everything to make sure I know everything. (My poor roommate had to listen to a semester of 17th century law). But there are so many different methods (flash cards, mind maps, group studies etc) that work for different people, don’t be afraid to try new things!

Do not take an elective because you heard it was easy: Just don’t (unless it sounds interesting to you), find an elective you know you will enjoy. There is nothing worse than sitting through a class you hate/don’t care about. Your grades will likely suffer too. 

Make sure you look after yourself: Take mental health days when you need them. Eat. Sleep. Shower. Get a little exercise. Clean your room (this makes a world of difference). Don’t be too hard on yourself for a bad grade. Spend time being social. You will thank yourself for it, school is stressful and not taking care of yourself can really reflect in your grades. 

These are just a few of my tips from my personal experience, I realize they do not necessarily cater to everyone but I hope they can help some of you, especially those just starting university or college!

Feel free to message me if you have any questions and please add to the list if you have tips you find helpful! (:

Stubborn Love - Steve x Bucky x Reader

Plot: What happens when fall in love with two different people, for different reasons, but they just so happen to be each other’s best friend?
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Words: 1,127
Warnings: None
Author’s note: I’m starting up a new little drabble series to play on for a while. (This one was a bit longer, so who knows what that’s supposed to mean for the rest. Oops.) Let me know what you guys think! :)

Originally posted by hoechlins

The crazy thing about bad days is that they can, on rare occasion, turn around and become something amazing. Something can happen that changes the mood of the whole day, and you suddenly forget why you were upset to begin with.

Between waking up late, having your boss scream at you once or twice, and missing your train to get home, you were convinced that you couldn’t possibly have anything worse happen to you. That is, until you stand outside your apartment complex and realize that while you were scrambling to get to work today, you locked your keys inside the apartment.

You almost gave up after that. Your feet ache from being on them for hours, the continuous noises of the city are getting to you more than normal, and there’s a good chance that your two roommates won’t be back from visiting their families until tomorrow so it’s not like you could call one of them to let you in.

You start buzzing your neighbors to see if anyone could let you in, but no one answers. You start pressing random buttons, hoping to get someone’s attention, when a man from one of the floors above you finally answers.


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Voyeurism (2) Masterlist

part one

Butterflies And Hurricanes - camisadan

Summary: Sex on a piano with Dan as a power bottom.

Camera Ready - somanydestiel

Summary: Dan Howell, the beautiful model, brings his boyfriend into work for a photoshoot.

Cherry Candle - edhasgotphanxiety

Summary: Phil buys a new brand of candle with a very interesting name: charming urge-changing cherry. After he brings it home and lights it in the living room, both Dan and Phil start to notice that something isn’t quite right.

Dishwasher Safe - quietlyposts

Summary: ’the guy at the sex store told me that my new dildo was dishwasher safe and you’re my poor, traumatized roommate.’

Helping Hand - dadhanzo

Summary: Dan leaves a camera in Phil’s room to record a prank, but the prank doesn’t work. Instead, he ends up videoing Phil getting naked/jerking off. Dan watches the footage back later and ends up jerking off to it.

Introductions - jilliancares

Summary: Punk!Phil introduces pastel!Dan to his friends, and he has a great reception.

Noises - phanjam

Summary: Dan listens to Phil masturbate to him in his bedroom often. What he doesn’t get is why Phil won’t admit that he likes him already.

Paper Cut - jilliancares

Summary: Dan’s hands are covered in paper cuts, and masturbating has become entirely to difficult. Luckily Phil is there to help him.

Rain Boy - crescendohowell

Summary: Phil spends his time chasing rain and thinking. It isn’t until days where even he doesn’t want to be caught in the swirling weather outside, that Phil is forced inside to a coffee shop with a seat perfect for watching the weather outside and the cute barista that begins to call him Rain Boy. (Or in which Dan is sad and Phil loves the rain.)

Sleepy Drawings - jiliancares

Summary: Dan is drowning is textbooks, and he can’t help it that he falls asleep in the library. Phil, an art major, can’t help it that he draws the sleeping boy, and neither of them can help the relationship that blooms.

The Jacuzzi (ao3) - wantyoumorethanbreathing

Summary: Confusion swept over Phil as he stood frozen in the doorway for a moment, hand still on the doorknob as he tried to make sense of the sight in front of him. Then he noticed Dan’s hand that was working furiously just below the surface of the water and he felt suddenly very warm.

Those Noises - the-butt-llama

Summary: Dan was alone in his room when he hears a noise from Phil on the opposite side of the wall.

Voyeur (ao3) - phantastic

Summary: Phil watches what Dan does alone.

Why You Should Wear Your Hearing Aids - jilliancares

Summary: Dan is deaf and doesn’t realize how loud he’s being while he masturbates, which is driving Phil crazy (in a good way).

I'm making my roommate watch Hellsing and...
  • Me: Alucard totally stole Abraham's jacket. I can see him at his open casket funeral and he just takes that shit off of him like- "Gimmie this shit motherfucker, gonna fucking stab my ass and beat then shit out of me, MAN FUCK YOU, takin this dumb ass jacket"
  • Roommate: But you know he came back like, I luv you tho bitch, you my bitch
  • Me: Nah, he probably acted like those widows in the movies, they were lowering him down and Alucard just throws him self onto of the casket like "DON'T PUT HIM DOWN THERE!"
  • Roommate: And he has like the full black veil and everything
  • Me: With like make-up running down his face and the old southern lady press-n-curl, just swinging everywhere
  • Roommate: I can just see Integra trying to pull him back while he's trying to get down there again

so my two other female roommates and I are all on our period (or as we call it, “being invaded by the communists”) and our roommate, B, (Kara’s fiance) comes home from work with a bag of groceries and tells us “I brought reinforcements.”

We are confused- UNTIL he pulls out oreos, dark chocolate, and a pack of ferrero rocher and continues: “for the war against the Communists.”

this guy knows whats up.


Madi's ~A-Double-Plus Student~ Sterek Fic Rec

(a.k.a the “Highschool and College” fic rec list)

The answer to any question regarding whether or not I have a few fics in mind for fill-in-tropes-name-here is always and forever: Yass.




shattered-beautiful  asked:

Hi! So not too long ago I read a fic where Dan put his dildo in the dish washer and Phil found it and was /really/ confused and was like 'dildowasher?' And then it lead to smut? I hope this is enough to find it! Thank you!

Dishwasher Safe - “the guy at the sex store told me that my new dildo was dishwasher safe and you’re my poor, traumatized roommate.“

- Gabriela