my otp is hotter than yours

So…which one of your OTP is dumb enough to ask if a lightbulb that’s been on all day is hot, and then proceed to test it by pressing their finger hard against the top of the bulb as long as they can before screaming, while the other person just watches in silence like ‘wtaf’?

Me Proposing to my future wife: I swear fealty to you, Klark kom Skaikru. I vow to treat your needs as my own and your people as my people.
My future wife (probably): That’s not my name…

@jeylovestoblog Submission :

‘’Hello my name is Jungkook and I’m in love with a couch named Brenda. I believe I’m having a very healthy relationship with my couch and all I’m asking from my friends is to respect our relationship.’’

My response :

Hi jungkook? Are you sure everything is okay up there and down there? O.O I believe you have your rights to fall for a couch, but are you sure about the healthy relationship part ? Her Name was Brenda, right?

Is she a good F*ck ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ? Your hyungs are just jealous cause’ Brenda is hotter than any girls they ever hooked up with.  #BrendaTheCouch&Jungkook 4life #LET MY OTP LIVE 

Originally posted by narika-a

anonymous asked:

For the one-word prompt: Natray/Gratsu and the word burn

Sorry this took so long to write, anon-san! I had fun writing it though. Your one word prompt got me thinking and this huge AU headcanon came out. It’s kinda long, warning in advance and since I’m on my phone, I can’t put it under the cut. It’s a lot of Natsu/Gajeel brotp, but it revolves around Natsu’s relationship with Gray. I hope you like it, anon-san :) thank you for the request!

— — — — — — —

Natsu watched as the intern from Sorcerer Weekly fawned over his…. What were they again?

Natsu scoffed at himself when he realized they didn’t put a label on what they were. They flirted all the time, made out behind the guild when everyone was brawling, and slept in each other’s beds now and again, but they never once spoke about what it meant.

Was Natsu his boyfriend? His lover? Friend with benefits? Fuck. He didn’t know, and that made the situation at hand really fucking delicate and complicated.

Natsu didn’t like the way this woman, Sammy (was that her name? Or was it Sarah? He didn’t really give a shit either way), was sitting too close to Gray. He didn’t like the way her hand lingered on his chest when she playfully pushed him. And he definitely didn’t like the way she leaned forward and pushed her tiny tits together.

Okay, maybe they weren’t tiny. Maybe it was just the strange burning in Natsu’s chest that prompted him to insult her.

That was the most fucked up part of this whole thing. The way his chest physically felt like it was burning. Beyond that, it actually hurt. Natsu had never had heat feel painful before. It felt wrong. Did someone cast a spell on him? Was he sick? What the hell was going on?

No matter what it was, he didn’t like it. He didn’t like a damn thing about this situation.

‘Don’t touch.’ A voice snarled in his head when the intern ran her hand over Gray’s forearm. 'Mine!’ Natsu’s brow tensed. What the hell was that?

Gajeel sat himself down beside Natsu. “Someone’s aggravated.”

“Aggra-what? Speak English, metal head.”

“I am, ash breath. Your vocabulary just doesn’t go very far beyond 'fight me’ and 'all fired up’.”

“Up yours, bolts for brains.”

“I came over here to help you out and you’re gonna insult me? Forget it.”

Gajeel moved to stand and Natsu shot his arm out in front of his chest, preventing him from going far.

Gajeel’s arm made brief contact with Natsu’s skin and sizzled. Gajeel hissed and pulled his steaming flesh away from the fire dragon. “Are you really so pissed off that you can’t control your body temperature?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Natsu stated smoothly.

“Please,” Gajeel snorted, “I can smell it on ya.”

“Are you gonna help me or are you gonna give me a hard time?” Natsu shot him a glare.

“I’m not tryna give you a hard time, Salamander. I can’t help you if you aren’t honest about what’s going on.”

Natsu turned his gaze back to Gray and the woman who was slowly edging her way closer. His fists clenched and he felt smoke leaking out of the side of his mouth.

“I feel weird.”

Gajeel let out an exasperated sigh. “Oh, boy. This is gonna take longer than I thought.” He pinched the bridge of his nose before slowly exhaling. “What kind of weird?”

“I… I don’t like the way she’s all over him. It makes me feel… I don’t know, angry? But not the regular kind of angry. This doesn’t feel like any anger I’ve felt before.”

“Maybe it isn’t anger. What else do you think it could be?”

“I can’t put my finger on it. I’ve never felt this way before.”

“Describe it to me.”

Natsu looked over at the iron dragon in pure curiosity. “Why do you care? What makes you want to help me?”

Gajeel shrugged. “Listen kid, despite how much I like to bug ya, us dragon slayers gotta help each other out. We gotta stick together. Besides, I think I know what you’re going through and I think I can make it a little easier for ya.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really!” Gajeel threw his hands up in exasperation. “As much as I wanna help, I’m not the most patient man when it comes to this kinda crap so why don’t you tell me what I need to know?”

Natsu blinked, soaking in what Gajeel had said. What a freakin’ softie.

“Fiiine.” Natsu blew stray salmon coloured locks out of his face. “Like I said, I don’t like the way she’s throwing herself at him. I don’t know her, don’t know a damn thing about her but I don’t fucking like her. I had no issue with her until she started hitting on Gray. I… I like Gray. A lot.” Natsu finished quietly.

“Yeah, I noticed weeks ago. You two have been spending a lot of time together.”

“How’d you…?”

Gajeel simply tapped his nose. Of course. Why didn’t Natsu consider that? Oh, God. That meat Laxus probably knew too. Natsu groaned and dragged his hand down his face.

“Moving on.” Gajeel looked at him pointedly.

“There’s something else.”

The iron mage looked a lot more interested. “That being?”

“My chest feels weird. Everywhere from my mid to upper torso feels like its burning. And it hurts.” Natsu rubbed his chest with the palm of his hand, trying to quell the ache inside to no avail. “Fire has always been my strength, my source of power. Why in the actual fuck is it hurting me?”

“And did this start when you saw that woman,” Gajeel indicated the hussy with a nod of his head, “started shamelessly hitting on your boyfriend?”

“He isn’t my boyfriend.” Natsu grumbled, the simple action of uttering those words seemed to make his chest feel even worse. “But yeah, it started about an hour ago.”

“So he’s decided it’s your time.”

“Who?”

“He found the one for you. That’s why your aching has started.” Gajeel continued, leaving his question unanswered.

“He? Aching? What the hell are you talking about?”

“Have you heard his voice yet? The one in your head that you don’t control. It kinda sounds like you, but it comes out as more of a… growl.”

“I heard it once, just before you sat down beside me.”

“Let me guess, the woman touched Gray and he got pissed.”

“Yeah. But who is he?”

“He’s your inner dragon.” Natsu’s face fell. He’d heard Igneel mention an inner dragon in passing but he thought he was yanking his chain. “Did Igneel teach you about what would happen when you found your mate?”

Natsu turned his head, slightly embarrassed to admit that he knew nothing on the subject. “He was going to, but he had to leave before he got the chance.”

“I figured as much.” Gajeel waited for Natsu to ask rather than push it on him.

After a few silent minutes, Natsu took a deep breath. “So why did I only hear my inner dragon today and what does he have to do with this 'aching’?”

A smile pulled on Gajeel’s lips. It didn’t take him as long as he’d thought it would to ask. “Most of your life, you’ve gone on instinct, right? Fight when you have to, protect those you love, strive to survive, etcetera, etcetera.”

Natsu let out a hum to show he was paying attention.

“And you know most of us dragon slayers are hardheaded stubborn asses.” It wasn’t a question so much as a statement.

“Ha!” Natsu snorted. “That’s putting it mildly.”

“Right?” Gajeel agreed with mirth. “Anyway. For some odd reason, a lot of us fight the instinct to claim our mate. I don’t know about you, but the whole 'hey, this asshole dragon living in my head chose you so you’re mine now’ thing seemed unfair when I heard about it.”

“I feel ya.” Natsu looked at Gray and it started to click into place. “Oh, for the love of Mavis. Are you telling me Gray is my mate?” That definitely was not fucking fair. Didn’t the Ice Princess get a say in this? What if Gray wanted someone else?

Gajeel held up a finger both to silence him and to tell him to be patient. “I’m gettin’ to that.” He sighed. He knew exactly how Natsu felt. He could see it in the way he looked at the ice mage with pity in his eyes. “I felt the same way when I found out Levy was mine. It didn’t seem fair so I resisted every urge I had when it came to her. But soon after, the aching started.”

“If you’re gonna tell me about being horny for her, I’m outta here.”

“I’m talking about the aching, not the longing, moron! Although I know you and stripper boy have already acted on those hormones in some way.”

Natsu flushed and crossed his arms over his chest.

A loud, obnoxious giggle travelled over to Natsu’s ears. “Oh, Gray you are so funny!” Natsu looked over to see her leaning her head on his shoulder. Gray not only looked unimpressed, he looked downright uncomfortable.

'Do not let her touch him! Do not let her hurt him. Yours. Claim what is yours.’

“What the fuck? He switched from saying 'mine’ to saying 'yours’.”

“Because you know he exists now. He doesn’t have to try to convince you by making you think his thoughts are your own. He’s trying to reason with you.”

“Tch. I’m gonna do what I think is best. Gray wouldn’t want to be anchored to me the rest of his life.”

'Idiot.’ The burning in Natsu’s chest intensified.

“Idiot.” Gajeel echoed a moment later.

“He just said the same thing.” Natsu tapped his temple with a finger.

“He’s been with you all your life. He knows you’re being stubborn.”

“Whatever.” Natsu shrugged. “Back to the aching shit.”

“Alright, alright. So I’m guessing since you feel it that you and Gray haven’t actually had sex.” Gajeel burst into laughter when Natsu’s face turned the same colour as his hair.

“No, we haven’t. And keep it down, will ya?”

“Sorry.” Gajeel let the last of his chuckles out before shaking his head to compose himself.

“Liar.”

“I am sorry! Okay, back on track. You feel a fire in your chest, right? Like it’s attacking your heart and your lungs.”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“When you haven’t consummated your union with your mate, the ache in your chest starts the second your inner dragon decides it’s time for you to be with them. It feels like your own element is attacking you from the inside. It’s supposed to draw you to your mate. No one can soothe that pain but them.”

“Are you fucking kidding?” Natsu buried his face in his hands. “You mean I’m stuck like this forever?” The ache in his body got worse, hotter, spreading to his stomach. “Ahhh! Fuck.” Natsu clutched at his torso, doubling over before taking deep breaths to calm down.

“There it is.” Gajeel shook his head.

“What? What is it?”

'He is the only one who can take away your pain.’

“The moment you make the conscious decision not to pursue who your dragon has chosen, the pain gets worse.”

“No shit.” Natsu eased his way back up, leaning his sweaty head against the wall behind him.

“You don’t get it yet, do ya? The original pain you felt? That was nothing. It was merely supposed to draw you closer to him. If you think what you’re feeling now is bad, you’re in for a rude awakening. It will continue to get worse the longer you fight your instincts.”

“Are you serious?!”

Gajeel nodded. “I was a wreck by the time I gave in. It felt like my lungs were being punctured by iron nails and my heart? Fuck. It felt like it was in an iron vice grip.” Gajeel shuddered and rubbed his hand over his chest. “Hurts just thinkin’ about it.”

“It feels like your own element is attacking you…”

“Yeah. Laxus felt like his insides were being struck by lightening. Cobra told me he felt like poison was eating him from the inside out.”

“I guess it could be worse.” Natsu subconsciously palmed his torso.

'It will stop hurting once you pull your head out of your ass and claim him.’

“Shut up.”

“'Scuse you?” Gajeel glared.

“Not you. Him.” Natsu pointed to his head. “He’s insulting me now. And he’s talking more often.”

“That’s another thing. Once they have their minds made up that it’s your time, they don’t shut the fuck up.”

'Hit him.’

Natsu chuckled and shook his head, focusing once again on the topic that troubled him. “Is there any way I can… not force Gray to be with me and not wanna rip my chest to shreds?”

“Nope. Believe me, I tried.”

“Tried what?”

“Everything.” Gajeel let his breath out in a huff. “I tried distancing myself. My dragon wouldn’t shut up enough to let me sleep more than 4 hours. I tried pushing her towards other men. That worked out terribly. I nearly ripped some dude’s head off. I tried reasoning with him. Every time I did, he laughed at me, the bastard.”

“Fuck.” Natsu grumbled.

“Listen, I get it. I know how you feel, but with a mate, it isn’t like that. Gray loves you too. He can’t help it.”

“That doesn’t seem fair either! We both know damn well if he had a choice, it wouldn’t be me.”

What felt like a simple burn in his chest was nothing compared to the inferno that ignited with his words of doubt.

'You dare question me, boy?’

'Yes, because you are wrong. Now shut up.’

Natsu wrapped both arms around his midsection and tossed Gajeel a dirty look for shaking his head at him.

“You’re pretty fuckin’ dense, you know that?” Gajeel rolled his eyes.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before the long haired dragon slayer spoke up again. “I spar with Erza sometimes.”

Natsu waited for him to continue, and when he didn’t, his first instinct was to be annoyed. Natsu heaved a sigh, knowing the elder mage was just letting him go about this at his own pace.

“And?” Natsu prompted.

“And we talk a lot.”

“For fuck’s sake, Gaj! Get on with it!”

“She talks about your team quite a bit. About how on first glance, you and Gray look like you can’t stand each other. And when you really watch the two of you for a while, you see the way you look at the other when you think no one else is watching.”

“What?” Natsu deadpanned.

“You guys aren’t as slick as you think.” Gajeel snorted.

“Fuck you.”

“Aside from that, Gray loved you before your dragon chose him.”

“What the hell are you talking about? I thought he didn’t have a choice.”

“Have you not been listening? This isn’t something to do with fate or destiny. While there is a magic that makes him more prone to wanting your affection, it doesn’t make him love you.”

“Prone to wanting my affection? How the fuck does that work?”

“It’s a small part of our dragon slayer magic that only has an effect on one person. The more physical contact you have with them, the more likely they are to seek out your affection in one way or another.”

“That isn’t fai–”

“Shut up for 2 seconds. It just makes him wanna kiss you and that kinda crap. It’s to encourage physical bonding. It doesn’t force him to love you. It doesn’t work that way.”

“But you said he loves me too and can’t help it.”

“I was trying to say you’re a good guy. I guess I didn’t phrase that right.”

“Ya think?”

“Last time I give your dumb ass a compliment.”

“Whatever.” Natsu scratched at his abdomen, becoming increasingly irritated at the growing pain. “So this isn’t some weird fate thing, eh?”

“Nope. Your inner dragon watches over you your entire life and he chooses. He doesn’t go about choosing someone for you until you’re 16. Gray has loved you since before your dragon decided it was him.”

“How can you possibly know that?”

“Erza told me. She knows your guys’ relationship better than anyone in this guild. That includes you two boneheads.”

Natsu let that soak in. Was his love for Gray that obvious?

He shook his head. “I can’t force a relationship on him just because I have a fucking sadistic dragon living in my head that wants him.”

'Sadistic?’ The dragon gave a deep laugh. 'You have yet to feel true pain.’

'You’re a bit of a dick, you know that?’

“I’ve explained everything to ya, kid.” Gajeel stood and stretched. “The rest is up to you. There’s no avoiding it. You can only put it off for so long. You might as well do as the dragon asks and claim him. He wants you to anyways.”

“Pfft.”

Gajeel shrugged. “If you want to suffer, suit yourself. I got a job to go on with Levy.” He looked at the solid script wizard, the love he felt for her on full display in his eyes. Natsu felt a pang of jealousy that Gajeel did not fail to pick up on. “It’ll be you and Gray someday. When you look back on this, you’ll feel pretty stupid, but as I said before, I get it. Do this on your own time.”

He turned and began walking to the bar. “Hey, Gajeel.” Natsu called after him. He paused mid-step and turned his head to glance back. “Thanks.” He simply smiled and gave him a nod before continuing on to his mate.

'They look really happy.’

'You will be the same once you take what is yours.’

'What if Gray doesn’t want me?’

'Fool. I’ve seen the way you two interact. Years of trust, laughter, bonding through fights, growing stronger together. Do not insult my intelligence.’

'Just because he likes to fight me and fool around with me doesn’t mean he loves me.’

'If you cannot see it, then you are just as stupid as your friend says.’

Natsu’s eye twitched, but he ignored the insult. 'I love him. I can’t make him do this. It doesn’t feel right.’

'Being with him does not feel right?’

Natsu scoffed. Nothing felt as right as when he was with Gray. Kissing him, holding him, talking about their fears and what drives them.

'That isn’t what I meant and you know it.’

'You cannot force him to be with you. It is as much his choice as it was mine.’

'Gray wouldn’t choose me.’ The fire in his chest got hotter, burned with more anger and passion. 'Stop that!’

The inner dragon ignored his plea. 'He already has. Love is not simply an emotion, Natsu. It is a choice. It takes determination to stay by the person you love. It takes patience in putting up with their flaws. It takes trust to depend on you to do the same for them. Gray chose you long ago, boy. You have simply doubted yourself for so long that you cannot see what he wants.’

'Why Gray? The word mate implies we fuck and make children, pass on our genes.’

'Eloquently put.’ The dragon said wryly. 'Every inner dragon chooses their human’s mate differently. For some, they choose the one who makes their human a better person. For others, it is true that they choose a mate with strong genes. I chose Gray for you because he gives you a sense of fulfillment you have not felt since Igneel left. He balances you out. He is calm when you are reckless, he is thoughtful when you are oblivious. He gives you courage, knowing that as long as he is at your side, nothing will harm you without consequence. He brings you solace, does he not? His very presence soothes your soul.’

“Thank you for your time, Gray.” The intern purred. “I’d love to repay you somehow. Let you take me out to dinner, maybe?”

Natsu bristled at the sight of the woman fluttering her overly mascara’d lashes at his mate.

'MINE.’

'Yes. Yours.’

'Shit. That was me that time?’

'You can’t fight your instincts forever. I won’t ease up this burn in you until you get it through your thick skull. You belong to him. He belongs to you. You are perfect for each other.’

“Uh, sorry but I’ll have to pass.”

'Good.’ Natsu nodded.

'You love him. You are being ridiculous. Go over there.’

“What? Why?” Natsu couldn’t help but gloat at the put out look on her face.

“I’m interested in someone else.” Gray looked over at Natsu, his face softening into a loving smile.

Natsu felt his heart beat faster, and the ache in his chest eased for a small moment. 'Mine.’

His inner dragon purred, happy to hear Natsu think the word with such care.

“Someone else?” The woman snapped. “You’ve been flirting with me for the entire hour and a half I’ve been here! Whoever she is, I feel sorry for her.”

Gray arched a brow at her. “No, I haven’t.”

“Yes, you have! You’ve been smiling and flirting and taking your clothes off!” She screeched.

Natsu’s spine stiffened every time she flailed an arm in Gray’s direction.

'Mine. Don’t touch.’

“I really don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m sorry for the confusion. Have a nice day.” Gray stood to leave, the look on his face both bewildered and unimpressed.

“You bastard!” Sammy shrieked, cocking her fist back.

'Protect.’

'What is mine.’

Natsu was on his feet in the next moment, sprinting at full speed with his fists spewing fire behind him to push him forward faster.

'She will not harm him.’

'Protect!’

Natsu shoved his shoulder into Gray’s, pushing him sideways just before he could be touched.

Natsu’s head snapped back at the impact of the small fist. He shook his head, a shit eating grin on his face.

“Who the hell are you?”

“Never mind that. Get the hell out of here and don’t come back.” Natsu took a step towards her, threats of violence dancing in his eyes. “If you ever try to touch him again, I will turn you into a slutty pile of ash. I don’t care if you’re a woman nor do I give a shit who the fuck you work for. Gray. Is. Not. Yours.”

“Who are you, his boyfriend?” She scoffed, trying and failing not to show the fear that coursed though her body.

“No. I’m his fucking mate. Now get out of my sight!” Natsu’s fists were clenched in anger, his skin had steam rolling off of it.

The reporter backed away slowly before grabbing her bag and gunning it out of the guild hall.

“Mate?” Gray breathed.

Natsu’s eyes widened, he slowly turned to look at the ice mage.

“Like what Levy is to Gajeel?”

Natsu nodded, eyes downcast. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

The fire in his chest flared, the dragon snarled. “You having to be linked to me like this. I’ll try to figure out a way for you to –”

Gray cut him off, grabbing his vest and yanking him forward. His mouth was on Natsu’s in the next instant, lips and tongue zealously moving with the dragon slayer’s until he returned the kiss in earnest.

The gasps that chorused throughout the guild hall went unnoticed by the two men. They held each other tight, tasted each other, soaked in everything about that moment.

The burn in Natsu’s chest dimmed down to a flicker.

His thoughts were incoherent and primal. 'Gray. Mine. Home. Mate.’

They broke free, gasping for air, staring at each other with lust ridden affection.

“You aren’t getting rid of me, Dragneel. You’re mine.”

Natsu sputtered. “Y-yours?!” He shook his head vigorously. “No! You’re mine!”

“No way, you’re mine!”

“That’s what you fucking think.” Natsu grabbed Gray by the waist and tossed him over his shoulder and turned for the door.

“What the hell, asshole! Put me down!”

“Oh, I will. But not until it’s on my bed.” Natsu purred with a smirk plastered on his face. This slight burn in his chest had yet to completely go away.

Natsu had waited long enough to claim his Snowflake.

His mate.

November Drarry FAV! - golden quaffle list

I wrote this post as a list of my November favorite Drarry (& Wolfstar & Harry Potter) stuffs, mainly want to say ‘thank you so much’ to everyone who wrote/created/drew my favs this month! May be you guys miss some in this list, pls chk it out! They are all beautiful and brilliant:) And me too, surely miss many really good stuffs! If you are not here, it may be just I haven’t seen it yet! Feel free to tell me, rec /talk/msg are welcomed!!!

(If you don’t want to be tagged, I’m sry. Pls send me ask/msg. I’ll remove it!)

I. Golden Quaffle - Best of November!!
//sry to have 2! I really can’t cut one off

1. Some like it hot @goldentruth813
I re-read this one about 4 times already! (I hardly re-read stuffs cuz u know! there are so many out there to catch up!) It’s utterly cute!!! The best flirt with the warm scent of coffee shop; Barista! Harry, Posh-as-always!Draco, I love every single detail of this story<3

ps. I really want to know the taste of Chai tea with peppermint syrup, may you tell me:)?

2. Scared, Potter?? @glitterifficshipper I had a problem to cry lately. I mean I couldn’t but after glanced this one, I sobbed like a child. Loudly. OMG. Not only that, I feel I read lots of stories but this’s my first time to read the last moment of Draco and Harry’ lives. It should be called as the happiest ending ever but if it is, why I cried this much idk.

Other Drarry favs: sure these are going to plaster a smile on your face!
Moondust in your hair @genderfluid-elvendork (I really love the song “close to you” - the cranberries so, this is perfect!)
Dorm Mates AU @i-see-my-otps-in-erised (ooc Draco but oh-so-cute! with drunk confession, lap sitting, hair playing)
Duck face Draco @hotter-than-potter (posh!Draco for mobile cam!)
- Blind Date @goldentruth813 (I really love your style of writings!)

II. Drarry arts:

The Saviour @citruslimey (sry this one originally posted in Oct but I really love the idea and the way of writing. Absolutely, the drawing is beautiful!)

III. Fav Wolfstar: 

Sensible Sirius is my type so these story are lovely for me
Amor @katestclair - I think I am weak for incarnation plot and here it is!
cute!drunk! Remus Request @lumosinlove - Haha! Remus is so cute. I’m melted!

V. Harry Potter Arts

Hogwarts Bathrooms @romyyao This is absolutely brilliant. Oh. I adore your drawing and imagination! Love Slytherin and Ravenclaw bathrooms most! but want to visit all. I think I can sleep in them. lol! 
Hogsmeade Places @asheathes I love the bright and colourful of these photos. Make me feel so happy just by looking it!

Hope I didn’t make any wrong tags or links! Some of them I can’t find the titles so, hope you don’t mind my setup names (I can change if you have, sry, if I missed it!) 

Thank you again!!! I love you all<3

Bleach fan pick-up lines


As requested by blueflamesofhell. :)


Last week we considered what one Bleach fan might say to another to make them go away. Now it’s time for the opposite! Let’s say you see the Bleach fan of your dreams sitting there, and you want to use a cheesy Bleach-themed pick-up line. Well here are 10 you could choose from!


1. “Baby, let me be your hogyoku and make your wishes come true.”


2. “You’re more beautiful than Rukia’s zanpakuto, hotter than Yamamoto’s bankai, and have eyes that pierce me faster and harder than Bazz-B’s magic fire finger.”


3. “Hey baby, why don’t you and I make like Yoruichi and disappear?”


4. “Excuse me, have you seen my heart? I think I left it here in your palm.”


5. “Like Ichigo said to Rukia - feel free to stab me from behind any time!”


6. “If Szayel met you, he could die happy. Because his search for perfection would be over.”


7. “I will cosplay your Bleach OTP with you.”


8. “I have a feeling that you and I are more compatible than Urahara and his hat.”


9. “We have so much chemistry that if we were Bleach characters, Tite Kubo would have to kill one of us off to keep us apart!”


10. “You know who you remind me of? Ichigo. Because you’ve got it all!”

Look At Us Now (Sung to the tune of Look At Me Now by Chris Brown)

[Intro]

I don’t see how you can hate from outside a fandom
You aren’t even in
Hah-aha, leggo

[Verse 1]
Yellow haired chick
Yellow champagne sipping
Yellow eyed hybrid
Yellin’, “I ship it.”
Yeah, yeah.

That ship look like a mistake.
We call what we get in two years, endgame.
Our ship is canon, we’ve got confessions.
If you saw what we saw, what would you say?
“I intend to be your last,”- this ship is endgame.
And them imitation ships? Hardly worthy.

[Chorus]
Look at us now, look at us now.
Oh, our ship is canon
Look at us now
Yeah, Klaus’s a button popper.

[Verse 2]
KC shippa better than imitators
‘Cause we’re destroying every ship that thinks they’re better than this ship
Better stand aside while we grow bigger, and you get littler
And we own this.
Oops, I said we own this
I ain’t tryna say we own this
But since I said we own this
All of you haters: we own this
I’m done

[Verse 3]
Hell, 
Let me show you how to keep gloating
When you’re doing that shipping thing homie
Ay ay ay ay ay ay 
Let’s go!
'Cause I’m feeling a little vindictive
And I’m feeling like I gotta say, what I gotta say, gotta say
Better know that we don’t and we won’t ever stop
'Cause this ship is ours, from the first first day, day
Go!
You ain’t ever gonna stop KC
Every time we excel, a writer gotta bash it, then we gotta go, and then we gotta get it
Then we gotta trend, and then we gotta shut out any little thing that haters think they be doing
'Cause it doesn’t matter, 'cause we hear dadadada
When ever haters speak, because all we see is KC sex against a tree
We do a lot of things, to make it clearer to all the haters
We always trend and then we trend again, and again, and again [breath]
And we be shipping it to death, and now we a little foul
But we stay classy- and that will always be our style
And haters know that KC’s the best when it comes down to all the rest
KC be banging- it’s the best, and they bang on a tree, and they’re banging with no rest
And we reblog that gif some more and they will only give you less
You will hear it in worldwide tweets or you can read it on fanfiction.net
Do you really wanna know what’s next? Let’s go
See the way we on it and we all up in first place and you know
We gotta go, now try to keep up with the pace
And we struggle, and we falter, but we come and we get it
And we always gotta do it and remain above the rest
Gotta ship it, and re-gif it
And we gotta cut through all this bashing
Just to sit atop the throne
Better know that we have it, have it

[Chorus]

[Verse 4]
Man, screw these anti-KC haters- how ya’ll doin?
You sound bitter, 'cause we’re better, We go harder, You get quieter.
We don’t ship klayley, impossibabies, not no klami, no substitution
Got a ship that has chemistry- it ain’t cheesy. Got endgame on our radar
We don’t care about no werewolf or psych major, we burn brighter
Dressed to the nines and in blue ball gowns- stares that linger
You haters need life savers, ya slippin under water.
Klaus said, “Caroline” She said, “Klaus”
And that’s all it takes to be “endgame”
We don’t care what you say, so don’t even speak
You ship’s been beat, like eggs in a soufflé.
That’s word to my ship, my unstoppable ship.
You’re out of your mines, the facts ain’t lyin, to the top we climb
You ain’t hotter than ours, nope, not with that writer who ain’t even trying
They’re poppin’, buttons? Nothin’ but hot forest sex.
Ain’t got no time to listen to you cry, this ship’s alive and it won’t die
Klaus and Care had sex all night,
Been growing since, “you’re full of light”,
And my fanfic’s getting longer, and I still continue to write
About the one true pairing that wins without a fight.
You shred paper cause you’re desperate, we’re still around
We say screw your disrespect
This is our OTP, this ain’t no joke, we’re the hottest ship around, 2013.

[Chorus]

[Outro]
Okay, okay.
It’s our ship, aight?
We’re shipping it forever.