my orlesian queen

Set List For The Wedding:

The Bard is from Kirkwall and likely does not realise the cultural significance of most of these songs.

  • Fereldan Folk Song about How Much I Love Andraste (Andraste is a metaphor for Queen Moira. But like, also, you know, actually Andraste.)
  • Andraste Had A Dog
  • Elven Folk Song that’s Basically The Mourner’s Kaddish and probably shouldn’t be sung at a wedding reception (In Uthenera.) 
  • Drinking Song About How I’m totally DTF King Maric and/or Teryn Loghain and/or Queen Rowan and/or Queen Moira.
  • Flemeth Stole All Of My Elfroot
  • I’m Orlesian And Queen Moira Kicked My Ass. Holy Shit I’m DTF. (Not sung in French.)
  • Hine Ma Tov, but in Elven.
  • I’m A Noble Woman and I Asked A Weaver To Make Me Fine Cloth (it was a metaphor for lesbian sex.)
  • I’m Getting Hanged In The Morning (Because I Killed A Chevalier.) #NoRegrets. (Credit to @biotic-raptor-lady)
  • King Maric is The Best King Ever. 
  • Shemlen Nobles Are Treacherous, Even If You Share Their Beds. (In French.)
  • I Picked Berries In The Woods with a Boy But We Got Chased By A Bear (It was a metaphor for sex and getting knocked up afterwards.)
  • A Song That Seems Like It’s About How Brave a Woman Warrior is (But is usually interpreted as being about Queen Rowan, so probably not a great song to sing when her husband is getting married to another woman.)
  • Fereldan City Elf Song About How My Farm Went Barren and My House Burned Down (My farm and house are a metaphor for the Dales being stolen..)
  • I Had Sex With An Apostate Woman Who May Or May Not Have Been Flemeth. She Was Into Some Kinky Shit.
  • The Soldier And The Seawolf.
  • I Cheated, So My Girlfriend Is Literally Murdering Me


I need to think of more though, cuz I don’t think this is enough.

I want to write a fan fiction/draw a comic where my Warden Queen loves Orlesian gowns, but never wears knowing that her people would probably see it as some sort of betrayal. So for her birthday, Alistair secretly has a gown bought and presents it to her. Shes overjoyed but at the same time sadden because she could never wear it. He tells her to go put it on, he just wants to see her in it at least one before she puts it away forever. So she goes to put it on and when she comes out, he’s gone, she calls for him but theres no answer.

So she goes out into the hallway, still calling for  him when he comes up behind her, putting his hands over her eyes. She asks what he’s doing and he says “you’ll see” and guides her into the ballroom, where there is a group of musicians sitting, and a table with two settings, and everything dressed up like a fancy orlesian ball. And when he removes his hands, she almost starts crying shes so happy.