my name is wade

2

Wanda: It’s about time we got introduced. The Mod has had our designs planned out for like ever.

Wade: Yeah yeah, just don’t make this dimension jumping a regular thing. Peter can’t know about all this multiverse stuff it’ll rack his brain.

Wanda: Peter…Peter…You mean Petra? I have a Petra Parker.

Wade: No! Ugh, let’s just finish this update already.

Biblical

Deadpool x Reader

A/N: So @bkwrm523hounded  (haha) me about this dialogue prompt she had, “ “FINE!  BUT ME AND MY BOOBS will be playing together in the bedroom. ALONE!”. So I caved and added the anon prompt request in my inbox "I’m going to stop you there before you say something that really crosses the line.” And this is the result. Enjoy.

Originally posted by marvelheroes

Keep reading

Massage Therapy

Nineteen yo!Peter and Pretty!Wade AU
Idk guys a scene came to me while I was driving so here ya go.
****************
“Peter, I don’t understand how you strain your back.” Harry shut the door to the fridge in their tiny loft apartment. “You never even go outside. All you do is study.”

“I do stuff.” Peter mumbled and looked away when Harry bent over to get the pans out of the bottom cupboard.

His crush on his best friend was bordering on obsessive, and was definitely unhealthy, but Peter didn’t know what to DO about it. The worst thing was, Harry knew and took every chance he got to smile that wicked smile and run his fingers through that thick hair and basically rub his and MJs relationship in Peters face.

It was like torture every fucking day.

“You don’t do anything.” Harry was still arguing. “But when I strain something when I work out, or you know, marathon sex-” he dropped a flirty wink and Peter wanted to scream. “-I have a guy I go see. Names Wade, he works out of the spa off fifth, you know the place?”

“Yeah.” Peter said shortly, neglecting to mention that he knew the place only because Harry paid for MJ to go, and she always told him about it.

“Go see Wade. He will fix you, I guarantee it. Guys got magic hands, and I feel like you need that. Seems like life’s been–” Harry’s gorgeous eyes dropped lower to Peters lap. “–hard for you lately.”

(Jesus Christ I hate him) Peter thought, but he took the card Harry handed him anyway.
****************
Peter felt weird lying on the massage table in just a towel, exposed and vulnerable and he hated that.
But it was too late now, the receptionist had assured him Wade would be in fairly quickly.

(Oh shit) the door opened right then and Peter sat up nervously.

“Hey, man, how’s it going?” Wade was tall, all muscles wrapped in a tight white shirt and fitted khakis, topped with hazel eyes and dirty blonde hair.

“Uh hey. I’m Peter. You must be–”

“Wishing I hadn’t worn such tight pants.”

Peters mouth dropped. “WHAT?!”

“Uh, what? No I said Wade. My names Wade.” A charming smile that put Harry’s to shame crossed a perfect face and suddenly Peter was very aware that he was just in a towel.

“So.” Wade started dimming the lights, flipping on music. “How do you know that obnoxious prick Osborn? He’s the one who called in your appointment. You guys dating?”

“No. NO. Just friends.”

“Well that little piece of information is going to make this massage so much more fun.”

Peter couldn’t help laughing, tugging at his hair a little in a frankly adorably shy way. “I don’t know what that means.”

Wade just wiggled his eyebrows. “Why don’t you lay down on your stomach there, cutie pie. It’s frowned on for me to ask customers out while they are mostly naked, so please stick around after I’m done so I can get your number.”

Peter rolled over, keeping the towel over his ass carefully. “Why–why do you want my number?”

“Oh my god I already love you.”
****************

Being best friends with Wade Wilson aka Deadpool would include (spoilers):

  • Meeting him before he knows about his cancer.
  • Sharing an apartment.
  • It’d probably be a bit of a mess, but you’d turn to clean the place.
  • Playing aggressive videogames.
  • Giving him speeches as if you were his subconscious voice.
  • Basically having the same humor as him.
  • You being a superhero/antihero too.
  • Getting excited when he finally meets a girl.
  • Getting close to Vanessa too.
  • The three of you eating chimichanga and inviting Peter Parker over.
  • Being friends with Weasel, and always being welcomed to the bar by everyone.
  • You breakdown when he informs you about said cancer.
  • You’re the first one he talks about the scientists with.
  • Not trusting them and expressing your concern.
  • Getting angry when he leaves Vanessa.
  • Keeping her company to make sure she’s alright.
  • Being determined to find Wade, and you do after the explosion.
  • Him being afraid to show you his face.
  • Your first reaction is to hug him tight, followed by a ridiculous joke.

‘’I guess I am the hot friend now.’’

‘’I’m still being the sexy one, duh.’’

  • You hit Weasel when he comments about Wade’s face.
  • Helping him beat up guys to find Ajax.
  • He gets impressed by your skills/powers.
  • Still, he’s fucking overprotective ALL THE TIME without realising.
  • Expressing all of his worries about Vanessa to you.
  • Having matching Hello Kitty backpacks.

‘’You may be wondering, why the red suit? Well, that’s so bad guys can’t see me bleed.’’

‘’Smooth Pool, smooth’’

‘’Can you shut the fuck up?’’

  • Helping him find Vanessa at the streptease club.
  • He ends up beating the shit out of some guy who tried to lay his hands on you.
  • You’re the one who asks Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead for help.
  • When you find Ajax, he continuously firts with you to annoy Wade.
  • It definetly annoys Wade.

‘’What’s my name?’’

‘’I’m gonna fuckin spell it out for ya.’’

‘’I didn’t know you could spell, Wade.’’

  • You get your turn to beat the shit out of Ajax.
  • ‘’You touch my best friend, you answer me.’’
  • Giving Wade and Vanessa private space after the events.

‘’Let’s celebrate that I saved my girlfriend from the psycopath who detroyed my beauty.’’

‘’Chimichangas?’’

‘’Yeah.’’

‘’OK, I’ll call Parker.’’

  • Wade thinking there’s something between you and Spiderman.
  • He basically scares guys away from you.
  • You probably would walk into something intimate.

‘’Wade, I’m going to the cinema with Peter, I’ll be back arou… Oh my god, oh my god. I think I just puked a little bit. Seriously guys, in the kitchen? We eat food there!’’

  • But basically him becoming your brother figure.
  • And you being the little sister he always wanted.
Hired Help (Part 2) (Deadpool x reader)

Part 1

Language, obviously, because it’s Deadpool.

“Run, run, run,” Deadpool muttered under his breath, pushing you up off of him with a loud grunt so that you rolled right into the pile of shattered glass.  “I think I just saw someone!”

Keep reading

  • So what if the next Deadpool movie started like every white teen movie?
  • *valley girl voice* hi, My name's Wade.... And I'm not like those other girls, oh no. I'm not a cheerleader, or emo, or a nerd. I'm just Wade. *pan over to Spider-Man". That's Peter. He is soooo hot. He's like if Ryan Reynolds and Andrew Garfield had a baby. *pans back to him* but me? I'm just Wade. And this is my story * Dirty Little Secret plays*
change.org
Please Remove Travis Aaron Wade from ALL Supernatural Conventions in Europe and the US.
This petition is to have the actor Travis Aaron Wade removed permanently from ALL Supernatural Conventions both here in the US and abroad. He is known for being extremely disrespectful to many female participants by sexually harassing them and then when these same participants try to make a stand against...

The situation has gone from bad to worse. On May 19, four people in the SPN fandom received Cease & Desist letters from Travis Aaron Wade’s lawyers. It’s ExorcisingEmily, Lua, Ash and a minor who he previously groomed and harassed. (Unlike the other three, she hasn’t tweeted about it, and also she’s a minor, so because I have a shred of decency, unlike Travis Aaron Wade, I want to keep her name out of this as far as possible.) He’s demanding that they take down every post about him, on all social media platforms, in 10 days or he’s threatening lawsuits and damages.

To spell this out: Travis Aaron Wade groomed and sexually harassed girls and women, bullied them, harassed and cyberstalked them, somehow found out their home addresses, and is now trying to scare them into silence.

Travis Aaron Wade keeps escalating and he seems pathologically unable to stop. This is a time when the fandom needs to come together. Please sign this petition to have him banned from cons and stop his access to young women in the fandom. Have people who care about your safety sign it too. Sign it even if you don’t go to cons but worry about the fans who do. Let’s show how we feel about this specimen. Let’s show him he messed with the wrong fandom.

⚜Mimic’s Writing⚜

All Writing

All Cesaro

Or Individual Cesaro one-shots by name:

Champion. ::Cesaro Smut::

He Should Get The Message. ::Cesaro Smut::

All Dean Ambrose

Or Individual Dean Ambrose one-shots by name:

Christmas, Light Up. ::Dean Ambrose Smut::

We’ll Do This Together. ::Dean Ambrose::

All Jack Gallagher

Or Individual Jack Gallagher one-shots by name:

CountDown With Me. ::Jack Gallagher Smut::

All Sami Zayn

Or Individual Sami Zayn one-shots by name:

I Know. But I Want To. ::Sami Zayn Smut::

It’s The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year. ::Sami Zayn Smut::

No one’s going to hurt you, okay? ::Sami Zayn Drabble::

Midnight Dance. ::Sami Zayn One Shot::

Fight For Me. (Part 1) ::Sami Zayn Mini-Series::

Fight For Me. (Part 2) ::Sami Zayn Mini-Series::

Fight For Me. (Part 3) ::Sami Zayn Mini-Series::

All TJ Perkins

Or Individual TJ Perkins one-shots by name:

Revelations. ::TJ Perkins Smut::

Christmas Cookies. ::TJ Perkins One Shot::

That Kind Of Accidental Photo. ::TJ Perkins One Shot::

All Tom Phillips

Or Individual Tom Phillips one-shots by name:

It’s A Christmas Miracle. ::Tom Phillips Smut::

Suit And Tie. ::Tom Phillips Smut::

Reward. ::Tom Phillips Smut::

Christmas Family Beginnings. ::Tom Phillips One Shot::

A Very Valentine Surprise. ::Tom Phillips One Shot::

All Wade Barrett

Or Individual Wade One-shots by name:

My Turn Now. ::Wade Barrett One Shot::

Dance For Me. ::Wade Barrett Smut::

Drabble Prompts

Practical Class - Deadpool

Originally posted by ageofsuperheroes

You were attending the third year of Medicine at Oxford University, you knew how difficult it was to be there, so you gave full value to your study and future, even more, because it was your dream coming true. At least that was your speech when it comes the time  of discursive and practical exams, where you always stay studying for hours and hours until you pass out from exhaustion.

Medicine wasn’t easy and sexy as Grey’s Anatomy, in fact, when you were in the classes or hospital you felt anything but sexy. Especially when the day at the hospital was busy and your internship went to emergency, and you ended up all bloody and sweaty and tousled. Today was one of those days, you were exhausted but had to review for the exam that would be in two days. So using only panties and a tank top, you were lying on your stomach on the bed while reading the huge book of surgical procedures. 

Then you heard the sound of something breaking in the living room, but you didn’t bother to go see what it was, just listening to the mutterings of Wade and his steps down the hall. You kept reading the book until he reaches your door, pausing for a moment to observe your body in bed. Wade groaned satisfied, rubbing his hands together in a light show of anxiety before playing beside you on the mattress.

“You want me to help you study anatomy? This one here is a nice ass, it’s meant to be tight and treated with respect.” Wade whispered hoarsely bringing one hand up your ass and squeezing it, an effect that you had when you didn’t wear pants.

“Today’s surgical procedures, Wade.” you merely answer, biting your lower lip to hide a smile.

“Great, then we can move on to the practical class, inserting objects to have reactions.” 

Before you could say anything, he had supported a hand on each side of you and stayed over your body, thus being able to rub his erection in your buttocks with ease. Wade grunted satisfied with the friction and put a hand to the elastic of your panties when you tried to get him off you just moaned excitedly.

“Oh, babe, I’ve missed your perfect ass… And you, of course!” he muttered with difficulty, stopping the friction to remove your panties carefully, using his digits to play with your entry already wet. “Oh shit, you need to relax, right? I can make you feel good, just wiggle your ass and moan my name.”

“Wade, just shut the hell up and fuck me already.” you grunted a mixture of excitement and impatience.

“Little girl being bad, daddy likes it.”