my mop

you, an intellectual: you can read a Shakespearean play 10 times and every time come away with having learned something new about it
me, also an intellectual, who is on their 43 rewatch of the FXXK IT mv: theres a mop at 1:33 which obviously symbolizes bigbang mopping up my tears 

Suggestions for glitter removal

These are all real responses to a question somebody asked about removing glitter from a stage earlier today:

  • A Magic Eraser
  • Human tears
  • A buttload of black paint
  • A shop vac named Mike Dyson
  • Sandblaster
  • Braze the entire deck with a plasma torch
  • Euro-mop it

And my personal favorite: “I will throw myself into the actual sun if my costume people ever do this to me.”

3

PUGS HAVE BREATHING PROBLEMS AND IT AIN’T RIGHT. THEY ARE LOVELY LITTLE CUDDLY BABIES WHO HAVE BEEN BRED HORRIBLY. BUT I JUST FOUND OUT THERE’S A SOLUTION THAT CAN SAVE THE SILLY BUTTER BALLS FROM SUFFERING FOREVER.

RETRO MOPS. 

LOOK AT THEM.

RETRO MOPS.

NICE GERMANS HAVE BEEN CROSS-BREEDING PUGS WITH PARSON JACK RUSSELLS AND THEN BREEDING THEM BACK INTO PUGS, THUS CREATING THE FABULOUS SNUGGLE BLANKETS CALLED RETRO MOPS.

THESE WEENY MUFFINS CAN RUN AND PLAY WITH THEIR LONGER LIMBS WHILE BREATHING FREELY THROUGH THEIR APPROPRIATELY SIZED PUPPY SNOUTS. THEY’RE BASICALLY THE SAME RIDICULOUS LITTLE SUGAR LUMPS THAT WE ALL LOVE TO HUG AND MEME BUT HEALTHY.

WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS INSTEAD OF BREEDING FROM THESE TROUBLED ANGELS WE CAN BREED HEALTHY RETRO MOPS AND SAVE THE WORLD. HAPPY LITTLE SQUISHIES FOR EVERYONE. YES.