my money is ready but not my heart

Famous Romans as Dril Tweets
  • Livia: i pay good money to load my sons bag with treats, and if Erasmus Infowars Copfucker wants to devour them in the university library, so be it
  • Ovid: if youre one of the guys who blocked me on here, i Forgive you, and im ready for you to unblock me now.
  • Catullus: I TAKE BACK EVERY KIND THING I'VE SAID ABOUT THE GIRLS ON HERE ! SHALLOW AND CRUEL ! HEART LESS DEVILS ! MANIPULATING MY POSTS & TRICKING ME
  • The Gracchi Brothers: "FEAR IS USED 2 ENSLAVE THE MASSES," I SAID AS I RIPPED THE FUCKIN DECORATIVE CARDBOARD SKELETON OFF OF THE COMMUNITY CENTERS BULLETIN BOARD
  • Cicero: in the midst of jade helm 15 and high gas prices. a good boy looks to the stars and asks where have all the angels Gone ...............
  • Claudius: startling how im the only person on this site with an actual human soul. you would think the other guys on here have one, but no
  • Agrippina the Younger: "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit
  • Caligula: me: nobody has to get owned today. please, please put down the keyboard and step back 9 year old child: Fuck oyu
  • Julia Domna: measure to approve massive depressing statue in the center of town depicting an emaciated mayor carrying a boulder that says "My Sons" on it
  • Julius Caesar: dis charged from the army for doing memes too much
  • Augustus: blocked. blocked. blocked. youre all blocked. none of you are free of sin
  • Nero: the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit
  • Cornelia: THIngs other people like: being bastards, being Uniformly tasteless THINGS I Like: Being reasonably kind, and trying to help, when i can
  • Cato the Elder: ive never laughged at a piss joke. (sees how impressed everyone is, takes it one step further) in fact, ive never laughed before in my life.

I’m about to start a whole new life. I’m ready I’m ready I’m ready let me crack open in seeds and float to every corner of the wind I’m ready I’m ready I’m ready

Emergency Writing Commissions!!!

Fanfics, Fafics, and more fanfics!

Come one, come all, to my emergency writing commissions! My laptop is finally here and ready to write stuff on it, and I’m in desperate need of money! I’m super short on money for paying for school, so I’ll write anything, and I mean anything, if it’s for fandoms I know! My prices are below, but we can adjust it as needed, so nothing is set in stone! I’ll tag and make a list of my fandoms too, so you guys can pick and choose from those! I’m practically begging at this point because I really do need to pay for some stuff, and I don’t have the money to do so.

My AO3 for Examples of my Writing

Prices:

 500 words- $5 USD
1000 words- $7 USD
2000 words- $10 USD
5000 words- $20 USD
10000 words- $30 USD

Fandoms:

Kingdom Hearts
Haikyuu!!
Free!
Yuri!!! on Ice
Gravity Falls
Voltron: Legendary Defenders
K Project
Katekyou Hitman Reborn
Miraculous Ladybug
Bungou Stray Dogs
Harry Potter
Doctor Who
Danny Phantom
Owari no Seraph
Assassination Classroom
Hetalia
Moana
Attack on Titan
PJO/HOO
And if there’s something not on here, but you really want me to write you something, let me know what it is, and I’ll try to research to be able to write it.

JOANNE starter meme

Lyrics taken Lady Gaga’s 2016 album JOANNE. A mix of angst, fluff, comedy, shippy, and nsfw inbox starters. Feel free to adjust pronouns and what.

  • Some asshole broke me in.
  • And this dance is on you.
  • I’m not flawless, but I gotta diamond heart.
  • Want a good thing? Put the money down first.
  • ‘Cause soon I’m breaking out of here.
  • Here we go!
  • I can’t wait to rev you up.” 
  • Now it’s a party.
  • My body’s got you pleadin’.
  • Light me up and breathe in.” 
  • Take my hand, stay _____.” 
  • Heaven’s not ready for you.
  • Every part of my aching heart needs you more.
  • Where do you think you’re goin’?” 
  • If you could, I know that you’d stay.
  • We both know things don’t work that way.
  • And baby, you’re just movin’ on.
  • And can you go a little faster?!
  • I crave a real wild man.
  • I’m strung out on John Wayne.
  • Here I go, into our love storm.
  • I lay around, touch myself to pass the time.” 
  • In the fire, I call your name out.
  • Up all night tryin’ to rub the pain out?
  • Your hands are mine.
  • Oh, can you hear me singin’?
  • My guessing game is strong.
  • It wasn’t love. It was a perfect illusion.
  • You were a perfect illusion.
  • Maybe you’re just a dream.
  • You’re giving me a million reasons to let you go.
  • I try to make the worst seem better.
  • But baby, I just need one good one to stay.
  • And if you say something that you might even mean, it’s hard to even fathom which parts I should believe.
  • Every heartbreak makes it hard to keep the faith.
  • Tell me that you’ll be the good one.
  • He has a funny way saying forever too fast.
  • Can’t blame a tramp for something he don’t have.
  • I don’t wanna break the heart of any other man but you.
  • Hear my sinner’s prayer. It’s the only one I know.
  • She wants nothing more than a man to please.
  • He’s thirsty when he drinks.
  • I can carry you, but not your ghosts.
  • Tell me who hurt you.
  • There’s gonna be no future if we don’t figure this out.
  • Are you holding out your heart?
  • We don’t need to keep on one-in’ up another.
  • I been callin’ out your name. Tell me that you need me.
  • Everyday’s a heartache. I’m just tryin’ to keep it sane.
  • I’d rather save an angel down.
  • Has our young courage faded?
  • I was spiraling out, and she was so alive.
  • Keep it real cold 'cause it’s a fired up world.
  • When I’m feeling small, I toss that cork and call.
  • Just another way to prove I love you.
  • We both know I could learn a thing or two about relaxing.
  • Today, I won’t be so hard on me.
  • After all, it’s just another day.
shadowhunters  thoughts

I’VE BEEN SITTING HERE IN A BALL FOR THE PAST HALF HOUR SOBBING AND MAKING INHUMAN NOISES AFTER THOSE SHADOWHUNTERS CLIPS HOLY FUCKING GOD HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE A WHOLE SEASON I CAN’T EVEN HANDLE LESS THAN TEN MINUTES anyway let me attempt to put my hella messy thoughts down before i spontaneously combust

PART 1 CLIP

first off totally digging the music it’s gotta edgy sexy vibe to it

alec my precious bby but also alec my sex god my heart and my ovaries are confused??

izzy looking like she’s ready to murder some fuckboys

the sets pretty too props for those pretty twinkly lights me likey 

DOM LOOKING LIKE THE JACIEST JACE I’VE EVER SEEN JUST FUCK ME UP

looks like the squad’s taken some gymnastic lessons since the movie 

they could give taylor’s squad a run for their money ngl 

I’M CLACE TRASH ALREADY IT’S OFFICIAL

CLACE FLIRTING AND THEY MET .2 SECONDS AGO

SIMON LOOKING ADORKABLY CONFUSED

LOVING CLARY’S SASSINESS WHIPPING OFF HER JACKET

‘let’s all just pretend to be more sophisticated than we actually are’

ALBERTO ALREADY EMBODIED SIMON IN LIKE TWO LINES

‘this place isn’t even hygienic’ 

PART 2 CLIP

pandemonium looks lit af

GOLDEN TRIO READY TO FUCK SHIT UP

alec you still looking fine go find magnus and fall in love pls

clary go find your man boo boo 

magnus protecting his fav red head 

MAGNUS’S EYES I GOT CHILLS LOVE HOW POWERFUL THEY’RE SHOWING HIM TO BE 

i would sacrifice my first born child for izzy’s hair 

clary’s lines tho

‘somebody works out’ ‘cool contacts’

nuff said

jace’s voice talking to demon lady turned me on tbh 

IZZY WHIPPING HER WAY INTO MY HEART

JACE ALREADY WORRYING ABOUT THIS SMOL RED HEAD 

‘CAREFUL’ ‘ARE YOU HURT’

jace you haven’t even been on a first date yet and you’re already slaying demons together sloooow down boy

whatevs the couple that slays together stays together

JALEC KEEPING THE OTHER ALIVE I LIKEEEE 

what do those men in black looking wannabes want with my child?

IN SUMMARY

everyone’s acting is pretty on point from what i’ve seen maybe kat’s could use some work with her reactions and everything but it’s the pilot chill people she can improve off of others 

special effects at some points were a little cheeseball especially the fight scene but what can you do it’s tv also again it’s the pilot 

that fight sequence choreography was hella good 

gotta say i’m pretty happy with it all (hope i’m not in the minority there) counting down the days till january ANNNDD TMI FANDOM

Help :(

I really really hate to do this but myself and Xthedarkone are in a tight spot right now.
With baby being so close to being born and having to move to a suitable new home, myself having to leave work early due to health issues and X starting a new job so receiving very little pay, this month we have come up short for a lot of our bills.
I hate feeling like a charity case but the fact is that my car insurance hasn’t been paid. Phone bills need paying (which when you’re nearly ready to give birth, it’s vital to have a phone). We’re short on rent (thankfully the landlord is nice) and our gas and electric bills need paying and we’re short on food.
If anyone can find it in their hearts to spare even a tiny amount to help us out this month, i would truly appreciate it.
Anyone who knows me well knows that i hate asking people for money but without my car, i cant get to hospital appointments and the others for obvious reasons.
If you can spare anything, please send it via paypal to t.herbert@hotmail.co.uk.
Thank you in advance and sorry again for being a bother :(
Love you all