my heart yearns for these two

anonymous asked:

fic prompt: Isak married even, a moment between Isak and his best buddy/man Jonas before the vows

“Man, I can’t believe you made it to twenty-four without learning how to tie a fucking tie. What the hell,” Jonas says, rolling his eyes. And it’s not like Isak can’t do it by himself—he’s just so nervous that his fingers had felt like lead. But he’s about to marry the love of his life, and that should be an excuse. Even always has this effect on him, no matter how many years they’ve spent together. It’ll be a dark day when the mere thought of Even doesn’t make Isak feel like a fumbling mess again, seventeen years old and learning what it felt like to fit in his own skin for the first time.

Isak takes a deep breath. He’d promised himself he wouldn’t get sentimental until the vows. Even’s no doubt going to be sappy as hell, and all Isak has is a sweaty index card tucked into his jacket. He’s written and rewritten them, but no words can ever capture all that Even means to him. Isak isn’t sure he even knows the full extent of it yet, not when they have years ahead to figure it out.

Jonas must sense his mood, because he chuckles as he puts the finishing touches on Isak’s tie. “Who would’ve guessed you’d be the first one out of all of us to get married?”

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I don’t know about you, but I have a gigantic need for Mr. and Mrs. Pines, the parents of Dipper and Mabel, to be involved in the greater Pines family clan that’s developed through the events of summer 2012. Their kiddos have formed such close bonds with all these people- both great uncles, Soos, Wendy, McGucket, etc.- and I’d really hate for that to have to be a part of their life that they have to keep separate from their home life. 

In nearly every fic I’ve read the parents never get the full truth about what happened that summer, and…? I dunno, but that kind of seems sad? That forces Dipper and Mabel to have to keep an entire part of themselves a secret, and at this point I think that’s the last thing they need. The stuff with Bill was traumatizing and what they need most is a support system of people who know and can help them with any lasting emotional scars moving forward. 

The kiddos may have Stan and Ford, but… I really want them to have their parents on their team, too. 

I want Dipper to get a skype call from Stan and Ford out at sea, and for the whole family to hear and rush into the room with excitement. I want the kids and their parents to all eagerly listen to Ford’s newest cryptid story. 

I want Candy and Grenda and Pacifica to all come down and visit Mabel one weekend, and for Mabel’s parents to allow them to all spend the night.

I want Mr. and Mrs. Pines to give emotional support to their kids when they both wake up at one am with night terrors. I want them to be able to hug their children and reassure them that Bill’s gone; the two of them defeated him last summer, and they’ll never let him harm them again.

I want the entire family to drive up to Gravity Falls that next summer when the working parent has their sabbatical, and for the parents to be able to experience the weird, incredible place that’s captured their children’s hearts. I want them to be on friendly terms with Stan and Ford, and to meet Soos and Melody and Wendy and everyone else…

to sum: I yearn for more content where Dipper and Mabel tell their parents everything about their summer

anonymous asked:

Dan ate two gummy bears too

LISTEN!!!!!!!!! THI S IS THE SHIT THAT MOST FUCKD ME UP ABOUT THE GUMMY BEAR VID!!! ! ! it mightve totally been a coincidence but you don’t even know how much my heart yearns for the idea that phil truly does have an established rule of eating gummy bears two at a time so they’re not lonely and it’s not just some horrifically cute shit he said for the sake of the video and obviously dan knows this rule too, so before phil even reminds him to take two he was already grabbing two and  like,,, he probs gave phil so much shit for that habit when he first found out about it, and i can just hear his high-pitched whining like ‘philllllllllll you are such a fucking flopppppppp’ but then internally being like, ugh you adorable shit i will obviously have to adapt this habit as well bc you are adorable and to be frank, you’re right, the bears cannot be lonely even as they’re being devoured, we cannot risk this, and that’s some shit children do and GOD!!! WHY ARE THEY UNBEARABLE ALL THE DAMN TIME IM TIRED~~~!!!

“Jungkook Cheated.” Finale 2 of 2 - Alternative Ending ~

Part. 1 ☜  ☞ Part. 2 ☜ ☞ Part. 3 ☜ ☞ Part. 4 ☜ ☞ Finale 1 of 2 ☜ Finale 1 of 2 Alternative Ending ✓

Y/N’s p.o.v ~

It’s been three days since he last messaged me, it’s been five since we broke up and our meant to be 3rd year is in two days time, not that it even matters anymore, but a part of me wants him to try harder. Wanting to reconcile, to have some sort of closure between us. I miss him - more than I could ever explain with words, it feels empty without him, I feel as though there’s a huge hole in my heart that even with time it won’t heal because it’s that badly damaged. I want him back, what he did was wrong, and I shouldn’t take him back but I don’t want to throw away what we had. What we had was beautiful, so incredible that it still makes my heart skip a beat every time I think back on those dates, those moments we had.

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Scandal 6x10 - Alternate Reality

Hello world. For the past 29 hours I have been glued to my tv, rewatching this scandal episode that I feel I have memorized verbatim but every time I watch it I see something new or different that I didn’t pick up on from the last rewatch. But my heart is open and filled with love as Shonda dedicated this episode to our star crossed lover, Olivia and Fitz.

Me coming out of my room after remaining in seclusion. I feel lightheaded. 

This episode was fundamental to the core of Scandal and what the story has always been, the evolution of Olivia Pope and her quest for life. This alternate reality did not disappoint me but left me optimistic and thoroughly sedated. For so long we have watched Olivia fall from grace that at times it appears as though we are looking at a stranger, but we are seeing a change, a slight turn on her axis. Bless you Shonda, for this episode. I never doubted the story or the quest to live a open, honest life.

Now. Let us say our Pledge of the Allegiance.

I pledge allegiance to United States of Olitz and to the republic for which is stands. One nation under Shonda indivisible with jam and love for all. Amen

We start the episode off with Olivia, Fitz and Jake in the oval. Fitz is trying to come up with a plan to free Cyrus but Jake is currently attempting to thwart his plan considering it’s something they all want, Mellie to be President. But is that necessarily true though considering Abby told Jake in 602 that she knows he doesn’t want Mellie to win. *hint hint* besides who actually wants to win an election that way and Fitz knows that they want Mellie in the White House for a reason otherwise why kill Vargas. Real Bitch and Penis did not stoop to those lengths just to support their fellow white lady. Nothing about this is right, hence Fitz wearing the light shirt and appeasing to Olivia’s former self about doing the right thing whereas we have Stevie Wonder appeasing to Olivia’s current side hence the dark shirt. A very obvious play of both good and evil, light and dark and of course the love triangle. Stuck between the two men she’s been entangled with for a few years; and her lack substance in her gut Olivia is torn as if doing the right thing will be all that right. Olivia begins to side with Fitz but the second she does Jake attempts to bring them both down about ‘something he knew 3 hours ago’

Originally posted by humorinrecovery

Hoe, how did yo Stevie Wonder ass tell time? Anyways ..ugh Jake brings up Defiance being a good thing and completely ignores Olivia’s obvious discomfort and pain regarding that ordeal that took place 8 years ago. Fitz looks to Olivia for back up but she rebuffs and begins to talk about Huck dying and how many more people have to get hurt, but Fitz isn’t agreeing with Olivia or Jake regarding them doing nothing and before he leaves he tells Olivia and Jake that he needs to know whether they are 'in or out’.

With Fitz out of the office, Jake turns to Olivia and ignores her pain but begins to talk about how life would have been much worse for Fitz had Olivia not the rigged election all the while Olivia’s head is bowed in evident sorrow for all the pain she has caused to Fitz and herself. But before Jake walks out he reminds Olivia that her life would have also been worse too had she not rigged election. Cue the dream

But as Olivia flashbacks to the past, most of her prolific memories are shaped around Fitz. We see the most memorable moments for Olivia, good and bad.

Back on the plane with the original illuminati…I feel nostalgic at the sight of Hollis and that old hag Verna. Ugh. My heart’s feeling all warm and fuzzy. But as we all know in real life Olivia said ’ yes’ but in the alternate reality she says:

 ‘No. We are not fixing the election. Fitz can win. He can do this. He can turn this around. And when asked about them losing Olivia says 'At least we lose with our souls intact.’

 Wow. Olivia believes in Fitz that he can win. But we know how this story ends and it ends with Fitz losing and Olivia being ashamed and heartbroken that she could have won this for Fitz and she chose to let him fall. Mellie makes sure to rub it in Olivia’s face about all she had to say was ’yes’ and so ironic how Olivia has used that same word when she declared her love for Fitz. But anyways, Olivia is feeling the pain and you can see her clearly wondering if she made the right decision at all. Now we know Olivia enjoys carrying the weight and burden but this wasn’t her fault especially not in this world. But. It Hurts nonetheless .

 Olivia is trying to escape and act as if she doesn’t hear Fitz calling her name, but she stops and tells Fitz she wrote him a letter saying she’s sorry for not winning the presidency for him. A letter, Olivia . Really? I understand you are hurt and you would rather do what you have always done, which is run. But don’t you think Fitz is deserving of a goodbye or an answer even one as painful as the truth? But Fitz tells Olivia that she didn’t let him down, and while America didn’t chose him, she can.

Excuse me for a minute.

Okay. I’m back. But barely breathing. Olivia being Olivia bypasses Fitz’s request and tells him that she is going to Washington to help Marcus Walker get a criminal justice bill passed. Puppy eyes and lips quivers couldn’t begin to describe the yearning those two people feel every time they have to part. Fitz wishes Olivia good luck and Olivia wishes Fitz good luck with Mellie. Olivia leaves Fitz dejected and broken hearted . My eyes hurt from the light of their love, and my heart breaks for the star crossed lovers, and my thirst is finally being quenched after such a long olitz drought that I am edematous.


Two months later after breaking up with Fitz, Olivia appears to be trying to fix herself by doing what she does best, staying busy working. Abby, Marcus and even Hobo Huck are all at Olivia’s workshop. It’s old, ugly and so very unlike our Olivia yet you can see the joy that she has with owning something that belongs to her and she’s not some boujee D.C. Girl like she is today. She’s humble and appreciative of the hardwork they have put in to create this. Beautiful. That’s pretty refreshing but I will tell you what’s not and that is Olivia dating Leo. Yup I threw up in my mouth at the idea of them….but another parallel to help dig the knife even deeper into olakers heart is the fact that our Olivia did this exact same thing with Jake after Fitz found out about defiance. She went on a date and shared a bit here and there but deep down it doesn’t erase Fitz, in reality or alternate reality, Olivia can’t escape the inevitable that is Fitzgerald Grant. Wherever she goes, he is always with her.

Originally posted by bballinspiration

The only difference about Olivia’s date with Jake and her would be date with Leo is that Fitz showed up for her and stopped her from making a mistake. So you see olakers it wasn’t necessarily Jake that was special it could have been ANYBODY even Leo! And before I hand olakers the final dagger, let me say that Olivia created this alternate world, and not once did she dream of Jake being in it. Olivia wishes she never met Jake, she wishes Fitz would have came to her and stopped her date like he did with Leo.

@dontfrget pic

Freshly defeated, Fitz shows up at Olivia’s apartment ready to ask for her hand in marriage. Unlike our scandal time we’re we see these two people both yearning to be with one another but because of time and circumstance they are always parted. Not in this world. Fitz isn’t going to wait to be with Olivia, he’s ready to be out in the open with her. Fitz showed up for Olivia even in her dream, he came back for her and stood on her doorstep telling her that he’s just a ex presidential candidate asking his campaign manager to love him, and do him the honor of becoming his wife because he’s so desperately in love with her and if she ’loves me half as much as I love you then it was worth the trip’

Originally posted by peaceisthenewhappy

As Fitz professes his love for Olivia, softly in the background their song plays. 'Will You Still love me’ the same song played when Olivia was arrested for releasing Rowan and we watched Olivia silently beg Fitz to still love her in spite of her short comings.

There is a reason why that song was played. Olivia was at her worse at the time and yet she still desperately wanted Fitz to see her and love her even though she was unable to love herself at the moment. Fitz’s is requesting the same of Olivia except much different circumstances. But the message is evident and by the shutting of Olivia’s elevator door just as Fitz had shut the door on them. But in this world, they don’t give up. They Fight. Olivia quickly opens the door and said ‘yes’ faintly with such overwhelming love pouring through her. The proposal is everything and more but again the one word Mellie said earlier comes back, all Olivia has to do is say ’yes’. Something she has failed to do often in her current life, and not to mention Shonda’s subtle mention of her own book. Yes.

@dontfrget  pic

I cannot begin to describe the joy still festering in my heart at the sight of Olivia following her heart instead of listening to her head, the unsurmountable joy radiating from her. Seldom does Olivia make such drastic choices without thinking it over but this time she went full force something she was unable to do in the real world out of fear.

The parallels are uncanny Mellie told Olivia in the beginning she just had to say 'one word’ and like in our realm of scandal when Olivia said ’yes’ to being Fitz’s mistress and effectively ending Fitz’s and Mellie’s marriage. Olivia done did it again, by saying yes to Fitz’s proposal. And we see Mellie lurking in the shadows at their wedding but she’s clearly over Fitz and not jealous of Olivia.
I’m sorry my pettiness is flaring up. But Olivia stays ruining Mellie’s life by getting her own life. You go girl with yo natural hair and backpack wearing self.

Now, back to Olivia and Fitz screwing the world so they could make their own.

@bananadome pic

Me watching olitz get it on. The whimpers. The moans. The eye contact.

Reunited and it feels so good. Ladies and Gentleman Fitz and Olivia are floating in space. Olivia done magically grabbed them keys from her purse and opened the door and left everything else behind. Olivia literally left her baggage behind but does that actually mean she left it behind? Yes and no. More on that later

Can I just say that I love that Olivia dreamt of all this. She dreamt of Fitz showing up and being her beacon of light and good. While Olivia has Huck, it doesn’t replace the hearts hunger for love and affection that can’t be suppressed. When the heart speaks it speaks. The attention to detail is a thing of beauty, Shonda truly out did herself with this episode, perfectly layering Olivia and Fitz’s relationship, once again reminding the audience and Olivia and Fitz that their love is real. For so long we have seen Olivia yearning but never actually tasting the sweetness that life could bring, the joy she will find in being ordinary, the fulfillment of reaching her goals without losing herself and the one she loves. This is the tender epilogue that these two souls deserves. They have suffered enough at the hands of others and themselves, it is time for Olivia to start claiming her life and taking it in her own hands.

The wedding


We see Olivia in the dressing room with just Huck as they get ready for the wedding and Huck cut his hair and trimmed his beard for Olivia’s wedding.(don’t cry. Don’t cry, okay cry) you can see the wedding jitters plastered  on both of their faces but Olivia walks to Huck and gets him ready for their big day.


As they walk another olitz’s greatest hit plays in the background. ‘You’re All I Need To Get By.’ This song was a turning point for Olivia and Fitz’s relationship, were Fitz finally earned Olivia and Olivia was accepting of being earned. The crowd is around her but all she can see is him standing there waiting for her. Olivia doesn’t appear frightened or scared about getting married but joyfully moved at the man waiting for her to cross over on the other side. Yes, he is all she needs to get by.

They exchange vows with their eyes remaining focused only on each other. With the chapel filled with roses we have set the scene to their very own rose garden. The church is filled with gold, roses, and lights that you get this feeling that this must be heaven.


Rowan’s clearly not happy with there union even in the alternate reality just as much as it displeases him in reality. The fact that Olivia chose love over power is an enlightening moment. Olivia is giving herself the life she genuinely wants and is becoming the person she feels she could be with Fitz by her side with Rowan staying in the shadows. Who would have known how much Olivia would have changed had Rowan never influenced her.

A year into their marriage and Oliva and Fitz are still happy and very much in love; with Oliva wearing Fitz’s navy shirt these two are still newlyweds with Olivia keeping count of how many times Fitz brings her to climax. I know Olivia took that navy shirt with her when she left the White House, there’s no possible way she could have left without taking a piece of him with her.

Even though Olivia and Fitz are married; Olivia still has her commitment issues as evident by her lack of compromise on moving and Fitz being lazy with his lack of effort in everything; but one thing is certain which is Olivia still feels the calling to be more, to create a name for herself, to be somebody whereas Fitz is looking to be a nobody.

Olivia wants to get this bill passed but because Fitz isn’t President in this realm and she thereby has no real power and knows any of the Washington elite Olivia is once again powerless, a feeling she hates to her core especially when she has to watch her husband with all the power vested in him be a reporter instead of a leader that she knew he could have been had she rigged the election. Oh Olivia and Fitz.

Originally posted by vhsnetwork

We don’t need to see Mellie and Cyrus and their pretense marriage and I began to ask questions about how Jake met Fitz and why now and most importantly I bet Rowan has him following Olivia and Fitz but I’m not going to do that because it’s not real and Olivia obviously doesn’t care about jake or even find him to be even equivalent to a boyfriend or stranger. So I shall keep it moving. Jake’s involvement is minimal to none and that’s why this episode is perfect.

 Ironic that Olivia has made a point to separate herself from the people she’s been the closest too and the people who tend to bring out the worse in her (Rowan, Mellie, Jake) versus the people she’s been the most distant with yet represent her moral values ( Marcus, Abby, Fitz) oh Shonda the subtle messages you are delivering in this episode has left me completely and utterly flabbergasted. Even subconsciously Olivia is aware that associating with her dad and Jake bring out the worse in her, which is why this episode is refreshing to see, Olivia is aware of the moves being played around her  but in this realm because she is not morally compromised and is wearing the white hat she associates herself with the people who do as well. Olivia is basking in the glow of light and love my friends.

Olivia with Marcus…where’s Harrison! Okay. Anyways. Olivia finds OPA and she buys it without Fitz knowing. Now, I’m not saying Olivia needs Fitz’s approval but in a marriage their is this thing called respect and communication something even in this realm Olivia and Fitz still lack. You talk with your spouse, you communicate your plans and desires with your spouse and not leave them flying in the wind. Fitz made sure to make note that Olivia wasn’t okay with buying a house but totally okay with  buying OPA. Different reality but still the same damn olitz. Even married Olivia still suffers from commitment issues and taking the next step toward the unknown.

Sidenote: can I just say that I think it’s really cute how excited Olivia is to be in the oval versus now. Our Olivia walks around the oval like she owns the place and she partially does but this Olivia is able to appreciate it in a way our Olivia never has. And Olivia taking a selfie with JFK’s poster is the cutest thing ever but unfortunately as her and Marcus wait and wait for the President they quickly see that it was a mishap and they are never granted entry into the oval. Such a sour yet profound moment for Olivia. She wants power, she wants to make a difference but she is tied.

Upset and dejected Olivia comes home to see Fitz wasting away his potential with a glass of scotch. Oh this is going to hurt, the two begin to talk around one another like Olivia normally does when she doesn’t want to fight but ends up going for the gutter…*cough 509* …*cough breakup scene* Olivia and Fitz are having the same fight they had during the breakup, Fitz being selfished, Olivia constantly hiding, and the unforgettable blows under the belt they exchange.

Olivia references the ’big dog’ again, how she looks at Fitz and she doesn’t recognize him anymore but Fitz can’t live with the fact that he failed Olivia not Olivia failing him. Fitz drinking this much is never a good sign. The thing about Olivia and Fitz is that when things are good they are great but when it’s bad; it’s bad. Fitz fills his glass of scotch while asking Olivia if she’s screwing Marcus since he knows it’s not him. Olivia fires back by telling Fitz he never had a chance of winning and that he was ’unelectable. Grant for the people? Pathetic.’

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

Always one for perfect timing; Olivia found that after insulting her husband she should then confess that the reason they are miserable is because she opted not to fix the election  and she is the only person who could have given him the presidency.

Originally posted by fuckyeahdragrace

I’m not sure what Olivia was thinking telling Fitz this now, oh I know it’s called self sabotage something Olivia does frequently and the most recent being after her abortion. She creates these near impossible situations to come out unscathed just with the hopes of being able to walk away from it all. Olivia plants these moments of destruction because it is much easier to be the one leaving versus being the one left. Fitz tells Olivia she should have rigged the election and Olivia is shocked at hearing Fitz say those words but she tells him “you wouldn’t have want to win that way.” Fitz disagrees and Olivia tells him that defiance would have destroyed them but it seems that they have done that already with Fitz’s final words being ’ at least I would have been President.’ Won’t lie I was pretty nervous at this point. This was the 509 fight all over again and I found myself having flashbacks and ptsd of that unforgettable episode.

Five months later

Olivia and Fitz are still together but are they really? Everything about them is cold and distant. Big sigh and deep breath.  

Instead of focusing on politics Fitz is now interviewing Lindsey aka Quinn aka the  bachelorette. The idea of having to lower himself to such standards and with Olivia’s words echoing in his head about being pathetic. Yeah. This is bad. And with Olivia’s Bill headed to the floor she is gaining the power without the help of the White House, showing that it is possible to have power and not lose your soul but one part still remains, will she and Fitz get through this together? And with Abby handing Olivia her divorce papers. The chances of them coming out of this together are slim.

Olivia isn’t playing games, she is getting her life and leaving Fitz behind. It is safe to say that one way or another Olivia was going to make a name for herself but the thing is that being on the top alone isn’t all that fun when you don’t have anybody to share it with, welcome Abby. Abby is forever Olivia’s voice of reason and truth(4x10)  and it still saddens me how low Olivia stooped with slapping Abby and treating her the way she did when she clearly holds her to such high esteem. Olivia brings up Abby and David being happily married, but Abby tells Olivia that she never gave Fitz a chance, and she honestly never has. Whenever Fitz falls from her ridiculously high pedestal instead of lowering the legs and waiting for him to get back up she runs or makes excuses as to why they will never work. Before leaving, Abby reminds Olivia why she is still living in her apartment. Woah.  In their current realm Fitz didn’t ask Olivia to move in to the White House but just took it upon himself, whereas this Fitz asked and pleaded and Olivia opted to stay put arguing that it was too big and cost too much. In both realities Olivia always had one foot out the door, she never gave them a chance.

 Olivia has some resentment over losing the election and having to watch Fitz chose being a celebrity over being a hero, for chosing that lifestyle over her and their shared ideas and politics that were so fundamental to who they were and who they strived to be. Regardless of time or the exact definition of their relationship, Olivia and Fitz always seem to connect through politics and the ideals they envisioned. ( ex. Brandon Bill) their relationship was at one of its most tumultuous moments with Fitz going to war to bring Olivia back. It was that bill that connected them once again and Olivia was remind of the man she voted for. It must be hard a pill to swallow for Olivia and Fitz as they move in perpendicular roads . Fitz needs his ass kicked that’s for sure but stick around Olivia to receive your reward otherwise someone else will. * cough Angela* *cough Quinn*

Quinn came into Fitz’s trailer to sleep with him and all I kept thinking was ‘don’t do this Fitz’. Don’t repeat Amanda Tanner cause this time you will actually be the father and Quinn would put you on child support before your pants drop. But Fitz and Quinn kiss and soon we find Quinn on her knees…yup…Amanda tanner style. The camera pans to Fitz looking at himself in the mirror as he attempts to drink his pain away but it doesn’t work and he sends Quinn away but somewhat sobered he sees his reflection in the mirror again and this time it’s stick. It’s a chilling sight to see but a much needed moment of reflection as he looks at the stranger staring back at him.

Mellie and Cyrus staged marriage comes to a climax where Mellie once again finds herself on the losing end, having been betrayed by Cyrus and Rowan who I’m ignoring throughout this episode. Mellie having been deflated goes to OPA to meet Olivia and tell her once in for all that she was right about defiance and she hates admitting that Olivia was right about defiance destroying Fitz. The parelles and tone of this monologue. Mellie confessed that she did what she thought she had to do in order to win and now she is trapped and being controlled by Rowan and Cyrus the same way Olivia is being controlled by Rowan in our current scandal. Agreeing to defiance, Olivia did what she deemed necessarily but now she is the one trapped. One of the good things that came out of not committing voter fraud was saving not only her soul but Fitz’s soul which is ultimately what hurted Olivia the most about Defiance. Hurting Fitz hurts Olivia.

Discussing Sally’s husband’s extra martial affair with James and the ’life of pretending’ On the air Fitz stops mid sentence and walks away. Fitz had been pretending for so long in our scandal realm that he forgot at one time what it meant to actually feel. Remember, pretending is real. Fitz walking off the set is setting the tone that he no longer wants to pretend, he’s ready.

Originally posted by bobs--burgers--flipping

Fitz comes home to a clearly pondering Olivia. Immediately Fitz tells Olivia the truth that he didn’t want the election, that he never wanted anything in life until he meet her. Cue the Olitz anthem ’the light ’. I just want to reiterate that Fitz has said this before, Rowan even acknowledge Fitz being a spoiled rich white boy who never worked for anything but found Olivia and was suddenly ready to be a man. This is true. Olivia showed Fitz the man he could be, the man he aspired to become with her by his side. While Olivia helped Fitz turn into a man, Fitz gave Olivia the freedom to love, and she does.

Fitz’s monologue is a thing of beauty but this wasn’t just entirely Fitz talking. This was Olivia. Fitz said everything Olivia has wanted to say but could never bring herself to speak aloud.

“Saying no to defiance was the right choice. I know that now. You tried to give me freedom. You tried to give me the chance to find happiness and I squandered it. That was on me. Only me. That’s why I’m sorry. I hadn’t  recognized it. I didn’t understand it.  I wasn’t thinking. It took me far too long to realize …. I have things to figure out. I have work, a lot of work to due; if there’re any hope of becoming the man I know I can be. The man you deserve. I still want you Olivia, if you’ll still have me.”

Olivia hands Fitz papers and Fitz timidly opens them expecting it to be divorce papers but it’s actually an ad of their soon to be Georgetown complex. Fitz picked Vermont for them and Olivia picked Georgetown. You see, unlike 509 where they broke up and went their separate ways, here in this world Olivia is claiming her life and ready to put forth the work and work towards creating a better life for her and Fitz, the life they deserve. In this world instead of fighting each other they hope to fight for one another. There is something unequivocally satisfying at watching Olivia finally seeing the life and light she’s been so afraid to have and to finally know now that it’s possible. Olivia doesn’t have to sell her soul for power and sacrifice love in order to be victorious. Olivia can claim the life she wants, if she is willing to fight for it.

Now that Olivia has found the key, she comes back from her dream with the biggest smile on her face as she once again leaves her baggage behind to find Fitz but this time I think the baggage might stay away. Olivia walking out the oval and leaving behind her pursue and coat and other possessions signifies this significant change inside her, now all of her worldly possessions me nothing to her without him by her side. The power, the money, the jewels are all an illusion that kept her from seeing the truth. Love. This episode is only about love. Olivia has denied herself this amazing love for so long and it seems that it is just now hitting her what it truly means. Love comes with setbacks and downfalls, you won’t always be happy but at least you know you have someone to fall back on if you fall. 

  But as Olivia walks through the corridor, she’s not exactly walking to Fitz but she’s running to him with such joy and vigor at what her life seems to have foretold. The mood is infectious and I feel we all have found ourselves rooting for Olivia and her pursuit of happiness as she runs to the balcony to find Fitz alone and at the same spot where she last confessed her love and desire to start a real relationship with him (4x22) . The balcony is a significant monument to Olivia and Fitz, it was here that Olivia came to Fitz after she removed her father (temporarily) from her life to create a new one with Fitz. As the camera pans on Olivia; we see her staring adoringly at Fitz with those little specks of light in her eyes. With this new found glow and light it is obvious that Olivia is feeling this extraordinary surge of love for Fitz and from Fitz. My God Olivia is in love and it feels as though she is just now realizing just how profound her love for him and the possibility of them is. Turning to Fitz she smiles at him happily as she tells him “I’m in.”  And she’s not just referring to Cyrus being exonerated but she’s ’in’ with him. Olivia is ’in’ her right frame of mind, she’s ’in’ love with Fitz, and she’s ’in’ this to win it. Olivia Pope is ’in’. I do not see Olivia making a complete 360 overnight but this is promising episode leading to a more satisfying ending.

For the first time in quite some time Olivia felt a tangible sensation she swore she lost long ago.


So I've come to a realization.

I’m in a lot of fandoms. Past and present and probably way more in the future. That’s not my realization though. My realization is that I’ve never before missed a fandom as much as I do with Hannibal. I’m a relatively new fannibal. I finished the series about a two to three months ago, but I do feel as if I’m pretty connected with the show. I find it fascinatingly complex, and I just miss it. I miss being able to follow the story of two men that share yet repel each other’s minds. However, I’ve never missed a show like this. I miss all my other fandoms whenever they go on hiatus or something, but it’s different than with Hannibal. I just genuinely miss and ache for more of my murder husbands. It’s amazing. It’s as if this show is a physical person in which my heart yearns for. It’s so strange. Look at what you’ve done to me, Hannibal fandom. I’m a longing and sad mess now.

you are that unattainable ideal
I admire from
my perch below,

an embodiment of joy
that does not seem real,
the stranger
I will never know.

you are the light
when the universe sings,
the sun can only rise
when you smile.

I am the bird
with two broken wings
who passed through
your life for a while.

I watch from below,
above me you soar,
as I try to fathom
a heart wanting you more.



the misery of
a lonely heart pleading.


the pain of a tormented
soul burning.

burning if only that I
may shine it’s light
to the sky,
to catch one more
stolen glimpse
of the wonder of you
passing by.

A Olicity Historical Romance AU: Touch can be so much more than just, physical.

A/N: There are quite a few flashbacks of dialog and scenes in this final chapter so I have made them italicized and bold.

Thank you all so much for reading my story and caring for and loving my AU Olicity.  This version of them was especially poignant to write and are extra special to me.  And one last thank you to @quiveringbunny for the gorgeous cover art she made for it. xoxo

You can read previous chapters HERE and AO3.


Chapter 6

Oliver had taken his mother to London knowing she would enjoy the end of the season, to be around friends and society, instead of the isolation of their ancestral home in Devonshire, which is where he was headed next.

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desperate day

(from over here, right here,
right where i am,
things just don’t seem fair at all;
none of it makes any sense,
none of it feels right.)

mcdonald’s bathroom, 2 am
it used to be they wouldn’t stay open this late
but things change, the times, they change,
everything changes eventually–
except people.

every fragment i meet is presented out of order and out of place,
every thought in my head is a mess yearning to be free.
i flush the barf away, but the stench remains–
on my chin, on my collar, on my sleeves.

(from over here, right here,
right where i am,
things just don’t seem fair at all;
none of it makes any sense,
none of it feels right.)

the parking lot is fresh and empty, after rhe rain–
almost no one’s around,
except of course the odd stray cat or two,
and a wraith or three but they’re gentle towards me these days,
they don’t reboot my heart as often as they used to, just by showing up.

the day was desperate, hot and worn,
so you’d think the night would offer some reprieve but no.
this is a giant joke, a sort of farce.
everything feels wrong.
i remember, just before leaving the restroom, i saw toilet water flow over the seat and onto the tiled floor…

there’s no magnum opus,
there’s no play or song or story,
just the coming of the bells
that shake heaven to its roots,
shake hell to its foundations,
shake the earth and its buttresses,
shake me down and leave me empty
as the drums subside
and leave me gasping on all fours,
right there on the asphalt of the lot.

“the bottom of the sea is cruel”
–hart crane

/// title is taken from the lou reed song “the blue mask” and bits of the poem were inspired by other songs of his ///

Promptly Prompted.

“A non-canon moment where Jamie and Claire are doing the same thing at the same time, he in the past and she in the future. They each can feel the other’s presence and are able to talk to each other, just for a moment.”

Here we go, folks. FIRST EVER PROMPT. Thanks for the nudge @romancoin

This takes place in two chapels at midnight: Claire in the chapel she finds solace in (St Finbar? Yes, no? Or is that just the dude’s school in Prince Caspian? Cuz I thunk I just made that up.) in Boston, Jamie in the tiny village chapel in Broch Mordha. Claire begins her first day of doctoral training in the morning, Jamie will hand himself over to the Redcoats come first light. Both come to find peace in their decision.

For some reason the chanting chorus of “Our Love is God” keeps going thru my head as I write this. ( @bonnie-wee-swordsman I’m looking at you) Mostly just the phrase “our love is god”, the rest of the song only tangentially applies.

“You’re not alone… when the morning comes… we’ll plant our garden here… our love is god.”

My hand slid along the wooden banister as I made my way towards the rows of candles. Their soft glow drew me in, setting my battered soul at ease.

It always did and I could never explain it. Something about the place seem to transcend the barrier of time. Having crossed that divide myself, it was comforting to be in a place that would have looked much the same two hundred years earlier.

Frank had scoffed at my need to come here, but that only firmed my resolve to do so. “You have your first lecture at eight a.m., are you really going to leave the house in the middle of the night?”

I couldn’t sleep. I might as well be here.

I lit a candle, whispering the centuries-old words into the silence of the empty chapel.

Kneeling, I closed my eyes and pictured him standing in front of me.

Blood of my blood, bone of my bone.

“Can you see her?” I asked the man who lived in my dreams, who would always live in my heart. “She’s beautiful and so like you. Its unnerving sometimes, how much her expressions mimic yours. Especially when she smiles. She has your smile, Jamie, and those blue Fraser eyes.”

Wiping the tears from my cheeks, I asked again, “Do you see us from where you are?”

I had to come. Not because I feared what lay ahead, nor out of the need to be absolved of my sin. I couldn’t put a name as to why, but I knew I had to be here.

The large wooden doors were unlocked. The small stone chapel had been here for generations and the priest who currently oversaw the parish felt that none should be barred entry to the House of God. I slid into the dark, cool interior of the chapel and stood listening to make certain I was alone.

I walked down the center aisle in the darkness towards a small flickering candle, the reverberating silence urging me forward. Taking the long taper, I lit a second, smaller candle from the flame of the first. I watched the tiny flame flicker and grow as I recited the words in Latin from memory. This rote recitation finished, my eyes slid shut, my knees resting on the cold stone floor.

I give ye my spirit, ‘til our life shall be done.

She stood in front of me, holding our child. My son or daughter would be seven, of an age with Jenny’s twins. My heart yearned to know if Claire had birthed a son or a daughter, and yet I knew it didn’t matter. They were safe, spared from the destruction and famine that overwrought the Highlands following Culloden.

“I see the two of ye everywhere, Sassenach,“ I spoke aloud. “I see our bairn in wee Michael and Janet. I see yer smile in the stars of a night.”

Something was different, yet nothing had changed from one moment to the next. I was still alone in the darkness. I could hear nothing but the clatter of my heart as it leapt into action, responding to a sudden surge of emotion.

I came to my feet, looking round. He was here. I knew he was.

“Jamie?” my voice trembled as I said his name for the first time in years.

Aye, mo nighean donn, I’m here wi’ ye. I made tha’ vow wi’ my blood an’ I intend to keep it. I will always be wi’ ye, ‘til yer life be done and it isna done yet, Sassenach.

The tears surged down my cheeks in earnest now and I did nothing to keep them in check. There was no one to see them, save the man who had dried them many times before.

“Oh, Jamie.” I sighed, words failing me.

Soon, Claire. I promise ye that ‘twill be soon.

“Where are you?” My arms opened wide, my soul torn into two. “Jamie, I need you!”

I need ye too, Sassenach.

My body shook with every word as I shouted them into the blank darkness.“Then me when, you bloody Scot! When will I see you again?”

I canna say, for I dinna ken. But ken this, mo nighean donn, no’ even death can keep me from loving you.

“Nor I you,” I whispered back, every ounce of anger gone.

an deireadh / the end


『i want to meet you, i can’t meet you…』

SolidS is Takamura Shiki, Okui Tsubasa, Sera Rikka and Murase Dai (CV. Eguchi Takuya, Saito Souma, Hanae Natsuki, Umehara Yuuichirou)

Or, in which SolidS is half hard, half crying, please send help. Full translated lyrics under the cut!

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The Games Goddesses Play
Fandom: Samurai Jack
Pairing: Jack/Ashi 

(Notes: Guys…I really need to purge my heartbroken feelings in fic-form. I’m glad Jack/Ashi is canon…but goddamn did that finale still hurt. I can never accept the occasion they decided to drive a stake through his heart. I’m not entirely sure how long this will be. Two-part, three-part? I shall see. The italicized poems are from the Hundred Poems).


If I live on longer,

shall I again, I wonder,

yearn for these days?

The world that I once saw as

bitter, now, is dear to me.

The samurai heaved a sigh, his back leaning against the tree, the bark scraping him beneath his gi as he slid down to the gnarled roots. He remained under the canopy of leaves, arms around his knees, lost in thought. It had been weeks and the throbbing ache in his heart still continued to plague him. The beauty of Ashi and her love, forever out of reach, was a lodged dagger, twisting painfully, slowly, everyday…

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Stealing The Bite Pt. 3

Word Count: 8,815

Genre: Smut, angst 

Author’s Note: The whole plot of this series is a thinly veiled excuse to write angsty werewolf Tae smut and I’m not even ashamed to say it.

                 The air was stifling, heavy with the weight of the centuries of secrets it had to bear. The walls glowed green under the light of torches stacked against the walls, the previous mosaic luster of the granite stones dulled by the blood and tears it had soaked up. The outlines of wolf shamans carved into the wall seemed to gain more depth with each flicker of the torches, the figures struggling to escape their stony prisons, itching to get at you. Fear numbs your body, and you fight to get out of your bindings before it is too late, seeking to invoke your magic. But it was futile, this place held ancient powers, binding you and thwarting any attempt at conjuring your magic. You were trapped. Even the air wasn’t allowed to leave. This wasn’t your place, you didn’t belong here, and the temple felt it too. It closed in on you, attempting to expel the intruder out.

The queen stood in the entrance-way observing you, a pleased look on her face. A shaman was circling around you, chanting and blowing incense into the air, the aroma invading your lungs and seeping into your bloodstream, crippling you further. His words were aimed at you and you felt every one of them like the lash of a whip lacerating your skin. Repulsion turned the meager contents of your stomach and you felt ashamed for having even thought about denouncing your origins in an effort to fit in with these creatures, in a plea for them to accept you.

You yearned for Taehyung to be here, wishing to know what will become of you. You were told that the reversing ritual will be performed tonight. The idea was simple enough, the shaman would cast a spell and then Taehyung would come in to bed you, stimulating the mate bond. But just before his climax, his betrothed would join you, and Taehyung would bite into her neck, marking her. His body, with the help of the spell, would get tricked into thinking it was you. Thus releasing his venom into the bite and transferring the bond from you to her.

You’ve never heard of such a spell before, and you didn’t know if it would really work. But the possibility terrified you, and with the origins of the spell traced back to Iblis, you had little doubt it would work. If you lose the bond with Taehyung, your fate would be sealed. You would be publicly burned at the stake as an example to any witch who dared to rebel. And the worst part was yet to come… If you die today, your soul will forever belong to Iblis, to do with you as he pleases. You wonder if that was the reason why he gave the queen the spell so readily.

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Dirty Little Slut (Wall Sequel) (M)

OH YEAH PART TWO IS UP WOOT WOOT - You can access the first part here.

Characters:  Song Mino (WINNER) x You (Reader, OC) x Sora x WINNER Members (cameo)

Genre:  Smut, Angst, AU


Length:  2280 words

Plot:  This is the second installation of my first Mino fic (WALL)  

You have been missing Mino since the first time that you had sex with him.  You wanted to hate him for using you as a toy; however, you cannot deny the fact that your heart still yearns for him.  How would you react if you will see him again?



Another Friday Night.  Thank God.

You slumped on your bed and let out a loud groan. Work has been stressing you out a lot these past few weeks.

However, there is one more thing that kept you so stressed and worked up for the last two weeks.

Song Mino.

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Once Upon A December

Originally posted by canonspngifs

Request- Hi could you write a fic based on the song Once upon a December from Anastasia- Like the reader somehow got separated from her brothers and lost her memory as well. One day she goes to this town and well she gets small feeling of deja vu, and vague flashbacks when she sees a certain black car (*cough* the impala *cough*) You can take it from there… sorry it’s long and discriptive 

Word Count-561

(Y/I)= Your initial (but the first letter)

Link to song  Masterlist  Prompt list 

Tag- @evyiione

A/n- This is my first song fic so I hope you enjoy it anon :) Also guys I’m finally back after a mini break look out for more requests and ‘That Boy Is A Monster’ soon! <3

As you stepped outside of your car you locked it and took in the scenery around you. You decided you wanted a change of scenery and Kansas sounded like the perfect place. However as you went to get your bags out of your car you saw a black Chevy impala.

Dancing bears, painted wings
Things I almost remember
And a song someone sings
Once upon a December

Two men got out of the car. One tall and one short. Suddenly you felt your stomach flip. Why did you recognise the car? Why did you recognise the men.
“Let’s just go to a bar and figure this stuff out later Sammy.” One of the men said in a gruff voice. Sammy? Why did that name and voice sound familiar to you?

“Yeah sounds like a plan.” The other man, Sammy, says before patting his pockets. “Dean you have money right?”

“Of course I…no I don’t.” The man named Dean says sighing and throwing his head back.

Someone holds me safe and warm
Horses prance through a silver storm
Figures dancing gracefully
Across my memory

The Deja vu feeling was getting stronger and stronger. Closing your eyes and breathing calmly you tried to scan your brain for any ideas on who Sam and Dean were.

Far away, long ago
Glowing dim as an ember
Things my heart used to know
Once upon a December

You didn’t realise while your eyes were shut Sam and Dean walked over.
Sam placed a hand on your shoulder causing you to jump and loose your balance. Luckily he caught you. “Are you okay Miss? “He asked with clear concern.

Someone holds me safe and warm
Horses prance through a silver storm
Figures dancing gracefully
Across my memory

Why were these men so familiar to you? And why did you feel so safe and not freaked out in Sam’s arms?
“Yeah yeah I’m fine thanks.” You say as Sam let you go.

“I’m sorry but have we…”

“Ever met?” You finished Dean’s sentence.

“Yeah.” He says matching his brothers confused facial expression.

Far away, long ago
Glowing dim as an ember
Things my heart used to know
Things it yearns to remember

“May I please look at your car?” You asked, and Dean tensed up.

“If you think it could help please have a look.” Sam says before Dean could say no.
Carefully you walked to the car and lightly touched the paint work. Bending down to look in the window you saw three toy soldiers. But there were two men?
Turning back to look at them you smiled and carried on looking at the car. You saw carved initials of S.W and D.W. But looking closer you saw the initials of (Y/I).W.

“Are you both brothers?” You asked turning to look at them.

“Yeah Sam and Dean Winchester.” Sam says scratching the back of his head and looking around. Almost like he was scared to say their names out loud. As he said that your heart dropped.

Both brothers tilted their head and Dean stepped forward.“Are you okay Miss? You’ve gone really pale.”

That’s why you’ve heard the names before. Taking a deep breath you also stepped forward towards the brothers…

And a song someone sings
Once upon a December

“My name is (Y/n). (Y/n) Winchester.”



“Follow your inner moonlight; don’t hide the madness.“
– Allen Ginsberg

A Poem By Christy Birmingham:
“Selene Awakens”:
Selene is moving fast,
Driving across the heavens in a
Lane of her own, behind the reins, in a
Moon chariot that lights up with her determination,
Pulled by two horses and a faith in Greek spirits larger than Earth.

Watch for Selene overhead, with her head shining brightly, bearing
A crescent moon that reaches from her forehead to
Your heart, as you watch her in hopes that
She will know the secret to why the
Sun chooses to sleep at night,
While she awakens and
You yearn for


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The future is amazing.

I haven’t been writing much because my free time has been utterly consumed by a new toy.  I bought a HTC Vive.  Normally I am not an early adopter of technology.  I get on the curve early, but not this early.  However, after trying a VR headset for myself, I broke with my tradition of waiting for the next generation.

You see, it is the most immersive experience I’ve ever had.  When I held a sword after defeating my enemies and a dragon flew overhead, I felt like a hero.  When murderous robots flew out of the dark at me I panicked and called my brother to get on his headset and play multiplayer with me so I had someone to watch my back.  And when three flying buzzsaw drones came at me I emptied my assault rifle at one, threw the empty gun at the other instead of reloading, and then screamed and hid under the table with my eyes closed until I died and it all went away.

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Aftermath: Life Debt

Grand Admiral Rae Sloane and Fleet Admiral Gallius Rax

Oh man, I’ve been enjoying this book and the interactions between these two are incredible. I’ve not been this entertained in a long while. I love Rae and Rax is a great new addition, he’s such trash. Anyhow, they’re honestly my faves and super important to me! (For the ‘good guys’ side, I love Mr Bones and Sinjir).

I’d say I could talk about them for hours, but I’m already doing that, huge thanks to @permian-tropos for the heaps of inspiration fuel. This is also a public howl to please contact me if you wish to share thoughts about these two. Thank you.