my friend on facebook took this

hey so someone commented the first thing on a picture i submitted for a makeup contest. Several kind women and friends replied to him calling him out and he replied about “getting to know the real him”. 

Can I just say that this will never be okay??? I don’t care if this was a joke to him. I know that I have personally always really hated my appearance, especially my weight. I’ve lost a lot of weight since middle school because of my own poor self image and comments like this I had seen being spewed at other bigger people. And not to get too personal but after reading this I went to my gramma’s room and cried on her bed for maybe a half an hour because it hurt me so much at the time. But even if I wasn’t insecure, this shit would still sting. Because to him and people like him, crushing people’s hearts is just a game. 

Don’t be this guy. Don’t put people you don’t know down for the sake of doing it. 

Man okay when I got my wisdom teeth out it was a fucking experience. Before the surgery wasn’t too interesting but as soon as I woke up I saw the nurse next to me and was all like “hey… i think… i died… and now I’m in a parallel universe… and i gotta go back to my house and kill the me from this universe” and he was just kinda like “alright, you do that”. And then the other nurse kept going in and out of the room to get things and I thought there was like 5 of her that kept coming out of the room, and then so when she was wheeling me out in a wheelchair I was like “damn… why are there so many of you… there’s like 5 many of you” and she was just kinda like “alright, you do that”.

Anyway I got to the car and my dad was there and he was like “how ya feeling son” in the dadliest way possible and I was like “MAN I AM PUMPED LETS GET SOME JUICE I’M STARVED” so we drove about 3 blocks to a jamba juice, whereupon I say “I’m good I can do this” and run/drunkstumble 30 feet to the door. I burst in the door like a viking returning from some fucking battle and holler “WHATS UP FUCKS” to everyone in the store, which was thankfully just the 2 people behind the counter, who looked probably as scared/confused as a jamba juice employee could look.

So anyway, as my dad explained the situation I looked up at the jamba juice menu and was utterly fucking lost in it. Like I swear I was looking at this menu board for a year, deciphering this Rosetta stone of fruits. I distinctly remember that I was looking at each item in a smoothie, thinking of how it tasted, then moving on to the next thing and thinking of how that tasted, and how they would taste together. Since most smoothies had 3 or 4 items, this took some thinking. So my dad sees me in this extreme brain blast state of mind and says “hey are you going to order or what”. Keep in mind I’m on the first fucking smoothie on the list here. So I just say “shush man I’m trying to do fruit science”, and then when I realized that this process could take literal years, I just said “yeah give me a smooth regular” which for the uninitiated, isn’t actually a real thing on any menu. Oh, also I asked them if the “boosted” smoothies would give me super powers and then pointed my fingers at them and made “lightning noises”.

So my dad just orders me the first thing on the menu and I go to sit down and stare out the window or some shit and my thoroughly amused dad just looks at me and says “how ya feelin?”. Now at this time I was feeling a lot of things, but most noticeable to me was the gauze in my mouth, so I just look at him and say “there’s these fuckin… tiny sheep in my head” which at the time was the best way I had to convey this feeling. Anyway about that time, the jamba juice guy brings us our drinks and he gives me a small thing of mario kart stickers and I swear I almost cried from the tsunami of emotion that gift made me feel (I still have them).

Anyway the rest of the story is we drove home and I explained this programming project I was working on to my dad in perfect detail somehow and then I came home and went on facebook and posted a comment on my friends status (because I couldn’t find the status update bar) that read: “i just took a lort of painkillers and yelled at everyone in a jambo juice”

1. i don’t know how to say this so i’m just going to say it - don’t text me anymore. don’t call me. don’t ask me how i am when you feel lonely. don’t check up on me. don’t tell me you’re doing well. i don’t want to hear it. i don’t want to hear it because you fucking broke me. GOODBYE.

2. hey, okay, sooo i thought i could be friends with you but it hurts too much. not that you hurt me that much. no, i’m okay. i don’t cry in the shower anymore. some nights i actually fall asleep before 4 a.m. but then there’s some nights where i think about you and her kissing and it’s all that’s on my mind for days. no, no, it’s not like that. it’s not that i love you anymore or that i’m jealous. i just hate you for what you did to me. so yeah, anyways, just thought you should know i don’t want to be friends. hope you’re doing well though. maybe our paths will cross again.

3. i told myself many, many months ago that if i wanted this to work, if i wanted us to be friends, i couldn’t talk to you about my feelings ever again. i couldn’t turn every conversation into our failed relationship. so for many, many months, i’ve been letting it eat at me instead. i don’t want it to eat at me anymore and you don’t want to listen to me whine so i think this has to end. sorry.

4. hey, listen: some days i’m fine, but the smallest things get to me. like i’m pretty sure i saw you on her snapchat story. it’s none of my business, but i’m really mad at you for it. i’m really mad that you still talk to that girl you chose over me and you still like all of these girls’ facebook photos but you never like mine. and it’s not fair for me to be mad at you for having friends or being happy, i have no right to be, you didn’t do anything wrong. but it still gets to me, still eats away at me, still makes me want to knock down your door and ask you why the fuck you had to leave, why you had to do anything you did, why i poured all of my love into you that i didn’t have any left for myself and you took it and gave it to somebody else. god, this hurts. i don’t want you to know how badly this hurts but it does. i’m leaving you and taking this hurt with me.

5. hey, hope you’re doing well, but this still feels like a nightmare i’ll never wake up from. and i’m sorry, i’m so fucking sorry, it’s not fair to you to have to listen to this shit because it’s been two whole years and i’m still not over it. and that’s my problem, not yours. it will never be your fault that i’m so goddamn sensitive. i’ve never been able to get over anything and i hate myself for it. please let me heal. please leave.

6. hey, remember the summer where i hooked up with the first guy who wasn’t you, when you had me blocked on everything and i couldn’t see what you were up to? well, i still read my posts from that summer and i was actually HAPPY. can you believe that? i was actually going about my life without you and i wasn’t thinking about what you did to me. but here i am again, thinking about it and the only thing that’s changed is that you speak to me. and i would love to be friends with you, i would, i’ve been trying so hard to be for months, but it’s making me so damn miserable. and i’m so jealous that she gets to be friends with you and i don’t. i’m sorry i’m not her. i’m sorry i never will be.

7. i’ve been ignoring your messages on purpose and you keep texting me again and it’s exhausting to have to ignore you all of the time and feel so guilty about it. i just don’t understand how you just don’t get the hint. so here’s a bigger one: LEAVE ME ALONE.

8. hey, okay, i know this is sudden but i don’t want to hear from you anymore. i don’t want to think about this anymore. i want to move on with my life and there’s no room for you in it. it was stupid of me to think that just because you’ve always been a good friend to me that we can be friends. we can’t.

9. hey. first off, i want to say i’m sorry, i just need to do what’s best for me. secondly, thank you for always being there when i needed you, but i don’t need you anymore. for now, it has to be just me. it feels like i’m breaking up with you and we’re not even dating, but this is it - this is goodbye. forever. don’t contact me.

10. all you ever did was hurt me. fuck you. i don’t want to see your stupid fucking name on my phone anymore. fucking get out. leave.

—  10 text messages i’m afraid to send because i don’t want to say goodbye to you, not again
I Hate You : Jack Maynard Smut

(basically jack and y/n hate each other but cant seem to keep their hands off each other)

i may do a part 2 to this so if you’d like me to just ask/request :)

“Move.” Jack nudged you as he walked by to get to the fridge. 

 "Wow, some manners would be nice.“ You shot back, rolling your eyes at him. 

“I’ll use manners when i’m talking to people I actually give a shit about.” Jack replied, moving back to sit on Caspar’s sofa. 

“Can’t you two just be nice to each other for 5 minutes?“ Joe groaned, sick of yours and Jack’s bickering. 

It wasn’t a surprise that you and Jack were like this, you have never liked each other. Since Joe introduced you - his cousin - to all of his friends last year, Jack has always been so annoying and pathetic towards you. No one really knew why, you both just never really clicked. However, the rest of the guys love you. You and Conor were super close but it was complicated as he’s Jacks brother and you tried to avoid Jack as much as possible.

"It’s not my fault he’s so immature.” You told your older cousin.

 “You’re both as bad as each other, to be fair.“ Conor laughed. 

 "Please,” Jack scoffed. “I don’t understand why I have to put up with her all the time." 

 “Because she’s our friend!” Conor defended you. 

“And she’s my cousin.“ Joe laughed. 

“I wish she wasn’t.” Jack took a sip of his water. 

“You do realise i’m right here?“ You asked Jack. "Grow up." 

 "Me grow up?!” Jack raised his eyebrows. 

 "Come on you two!“ Caspar laughed. 

You gave Jack the evils before going back to your laptop, scrolling through facebook. 

“So what are we doing?” Joe asked. “Ice skating?”

 "Yeah, buddy, how excited are you?“ Caspar exclaimed as he put his arm round Joe. 

"Get off me!” Joe pushed him away. “Well when are we going?" 

“Now, I think. The car’s here.” Josh told everyone, getting up from his chair. 

“So am I getting a car in 20 minutes yeah?“ Jack asked Josh. 

 "Yeah, you and Y/N are getting that one.” Josh replied. 

 "Why me?“ You groaned. 

“Because you two are being annoying today and need to sort your shit out.” Josh told us.  

“Josh, don’t be a dick head.“ Jack warned, eyeing Josh. 

 "I’m not. You two talk. This car is full.” Josh told us, everyone leaving.

 Everyone said their goodbye’s and eventually it was just you and Jack in Caspar’s apartment. Jack was in the same spot on Caspar’s sofa and you were still stood up, on your laptop, which was on the work top. 

 "You don’t always need to be a prick, you know.“ You spoke up, causing Jack to turn his head in your direction. He raised his eyebrows at you.

 "Yes, I do.” He replied before turning back to the TV. 

“Why?“ You asked, walking towards him slowly. 

“Because I hate you.” Jack replied, standing up quickly and walking past you. He placed his bottle of water on the side before slipping out his phone and leaning against the side. 

“I hate you too.“ You scoff, going back to your laptop. 

 Even though you really disliked Jack, you didn’t hate him. You hoped he didn’t hate you either. He’s just very annoying and has always been annoying. If he hadn’t held some sort of grudge against you since day one then you would probably get on really well. 

 You suddenly had a really good idea as you spotted Jack’s water bottle that didn’t have a lid on. Slowly wondering over, Jack’s eyes stayed on his phone, you went right next to him. As you leaned towards him to go for the water bottle, he spoke. 

 "What are you doing?” He snapped. 

“Uhh… Just getting…“ You started, leaning over and knocking the bottle towards Jack. The water went all over his white t-shirt that he was wearing and he immediately jumped away. 

 "What the fuck are you doing?!” He shouted. 

 "Oops, my hand slipped.“ You shrugged, a small smile on your lips.

 "You’re such a fucking bitch!” He groaned, trying to pull the back of his t shirt round so he can see the wet patch. 

“I wouldn’t wear that out if I were you.“ You giggled, watching Jack. His blue eyes were now narrow and angry, giving you the evils. 

“Fuck off.” He muttered, storming off into Caspar’s bedroom. Within a few seconds, he came back and walked to the corner of the living room where Caspar’s clothes were hanging up to dry.

 Jack picked up one of Caspar’s black t shirts, feeling it to see if it was fully dry. You guessed it was as Jack then took you by surprise and pulled his wet t shirt up and off. You immediately lost your breath as you saw Jack’s body. As you saw his glistening skin, you could feel yourself go bright red and tried your hardest not to look. It didn’t really work though as Jack caught your eye. 

“Stop checking me out.“ He teased with a grin. 

 "I-i’m not.” You quickly replied.

 You looked down at your laptop, trying to avoid the conversation. But you could see him in the corner of your eye as he just wasn’t putting on Caspar’s t shirt. Suddenly he started walking over to you. You gulped nervously, not trusting yourself. Jack went behind you, getting closer and closer. You felt yourself getting hotter as he placed his bare chest against your back. Why was he doing this? You hated Jack, why is he messing with you this way? You felt his crotch against your bum and his hand on your hip. He placed the t shirt down on the work top before moving all your hair to one side. 

 "Like what you see?“ Jack whispered in your ear. His hot breath sent goosebumps all over your body and you suddenly lost your voice. You turned around so your facing him, meeting with his grinning face. 

 "W- what are you doing?” You stuttered, not knowing where to put your hands as Jack kept getting closer and closer. His hands went to the work top either side of you, blocking you in. His body was now pressed against your own as he was getting closer again. As his face was just inches from yours, he muttered something. 

 "I really fucking hate you.“ 

 "I hate you too.” You mumbled back as his lips brushed against yours. You didn’t like him - you really didn’t - but the hatred had created this tension between you and he was standing there with no shirt on, his blond hair was messy but looked perfect, his bright blue eyes were dark and narrow and his lips were almost on yours. You couldn’t help yourself. 

As soon as his lips were pressed against yours, your hands snaked up his body and round his neck. He kisses you desperately, as if his life depended on it. As if he needed you more than anything. His lips were soft and felt good against yours and when he bit down gently on your bottom lip you couldn’t help but let out a moan. 

 "Jack.“ You gasped as his lips went to your neck, sucking the skin and leaving wet marks. 

“Up.” He told you. Within seconds you were up on the work top and he was kissing the life out of you. He moved himself so he was in between your legs and his arms were around your waist. His tongue entered your mouth and your hands went to his hair, running your fingers up and down the back of his head. You were immediately snapped back to reality when Jack’s phone started to ring. He let you go within seconds and fished his phone from his back pocket. 

 "H-hello?“ Jack breathed out, clearly short for breath. You were exactly the same, out of breath. It took you a few seconds to actually realise what had just happened. Jack had kissed you. And you really liked it. The loss of contact from him made you realise how intimate you had been.

 "Now?” Jack spoke into the phone as he reached for the t shirt that was on the side. “OK, see you soon.” Jack slipped the t shirt on after hanging up the phone. 

“Uber’s here.“ Jack muttered to you, not even looking in your direction. You both grabbed your things and made your way down to the car in silence.

 / 

“Hey guys.” Caspar greeted you both as you and Jack met them by the ice rink. 

 "Hey buddy.“ Jack spoke to him. You were angry, to say the least. Why would Jack kiss you like that then not talk to you? So, what happens now… You’re just going to go back to hating each other. 

 "You guys have fun?” Caspar asked Jack.  

“Its never fun with her.“ Ouch. As Jack’s words left his mouth he answered your question. Yes, back to hating each other it is. 

“You alright, babe?” Conor asked you as you all picked up your skates. 

“Yeah.“ You sighed but Conor realised you weren’t. 

 "Y/N.” Conor warned, giving you a look. 

“Don’t worry, i’ll tell you later.“ You brushed him off, sitting down as you pulled on your skates. Your thoughts were clouding up your mind you didn’t even realise how long it was taking you to put your ice skates on. 

“Y/N?” Conor nudged you. 

“I can’t get them on.“ You groaned. The situation was stressing you out. 

“Would you like some help?” A male voice spoke up. You looked up to where the voice was coming from. It was a man, who worked on the ice rink, who was rather good looking. 

“Oh- Uh, yeah please.“ You smiled at him. He bent down to his knees and did up your skates. You stared at him the whole time, his dark hair was perfectly styled and his hazel eyes looked up at you when he had finished. 

“Thanks.” You spoke. He responded with a smile and held his hand out to you. At first you didn’t realise what he was doing but soon caught on and placed your hand on his. He pulled you up and flashed you a grin. It was good timing as the bell went off, signalling that it was ready for everyone to go on the ice. You thanked the man one last time before turning back to the boys. The first person who caught your eye was of course Jack, who was stood in between Joe and Josh, with the dirtiest look on his face. When your eyes met his, he began to shake his head. You shot him a questioning look but he just looked away. 

 All of you finally got onto the ice and you immediately grabbed onto the edge. So did most of the boys. Joe and Jack were quite good though as they skated off past you. You, Josh, Caspar, Mikey, Oli and Conor were all holding onto the edge for a little while until they all started getting more confident and skated by themselves. You were still holding on, moving your skates slowly on the ice but still slipping every now and then. You were no where near confident enough to let go. 

“Here.“ The same voice from earlier said as the man reach for your hand. 

"Second time you have helped me today.” You laughed as him help your hand tightly, going around the ice. 

 "You’re good at this, why are you holding onto the side?“ He laughed, running his gloved hand through his hair. 

“I don’t know, i’m just scared of falling over.” You replied. All of the guys were skating confidently round the rink, although Mikey and Oli kept falling over due to the others pushing them. 

 "I have to go.“ The man spoke after skating with you for a few minutes. Of course, he had to do his job. 

 "Well thanks, again.” You laughed. He winked at you before skating off. You decided to skate in the middle of the ice for a bit even though your heart was beating like crazy - nervous of falling over. Conor and Josh were just a little bit ahead of you so you caught up with them. You went in-between them, grabbing onto their hands. 

 "Well there she is!“ Josh laughed as he saw you. 

 "Whos that guy?” Conor asked as you all skated together, hand in hand. 

What guy?“ You asked. 

“That guy you were just with.” Conor replied. 

 "Oh, i don’t know, he just helped me.“ You shrugged.

The three of you skated together for a while until Josh tripped and pulled you both over with him. You were not happy with him but couldn’t help but laugh. You decided to skate by yourself for a little while to get your balance right. Until you felt someone behind you, nudging you out of the way. You reacted quickly by grabbing onto their arm so you don’t fall. You were met with two bright blue eyes that you loved to hate. As you gripped onto him, you were still unsteady so Jack grabbed onto your waist, helping you gain your balance.

"Why did you do that?” You asked, looking into his eyes as he grinned. 

“Funny.” He shrugged. 

 "I hate you.“ You groaned, getting out of his grip and skating off. 

"Where’s your boyfriend?” He asked as he skated beside you. 

“What are you talking about?“ You snapped. 

 "That guy.” Jack replied. 

“He was helping me, Jack, grow up.“ 

 "Whatever, babe.” He teased as he grabbed your hand, which took you by surprise. 

 "What are you doing? Get off!“ You pulled away but he didn’t let you go. You both lost your balance on the ice and Jack pulled you down with him as he fell. It was so embarrassing as you fell right onto the ice next to Jack, making your clothes soaking wet. "For fuck sake Jack!” You whined. 

Getting up, you were so angry with Jack. Why does he always wind you up? Its like its his mission to annoy you. 

 "Sorry, babe.“ Jack laughed as he got up. ”

Fuck off!“ You snapped before going over to tell the boys you were leaving. 

/

 You had finished your shower - at Joe’s, where you were staying - to realise everyone had come back here.

They were all so rowdy you could hear them a mile away. As you got out, you realised that your clean clothes were in the washing pile that was in the wash room. Everyone was downstairs by the sound of it, so with your towel wrapped around your wet body and tip toed out of Joe’s spare bedroom go the wash room. 

“Y/N.” Jack’s voice made you stop dead in your tracks. You turned to see Jack at the top of the stairs, in the same black t shirt he was wearing earlier. His hair was messy but look good as always and he held a tight expression on his face as he looked you up and down. 

 "I- i’m just getting some clothes.“ You told him as you sped walked to the wash room and picked up some joggers and a t shirt. When you walked back out onto the landing, you were thankful to see that Jack wasn’t there. However, when you went back into your room, Jack was stood there waiting for you. 

“What do you want, Jack? I’m trying to get dressed.” You sighed, placing your clothes down on the bed. 

“Are you still angry at me?“ Jack asked. 

 "I’m always angry at you.” You sighed. Jack ran his fingers through his hair and also sighed. 

“I need to get dressed.“ You told him again. 

 "So get dressed.” He shrugged. You rolled your eyes at him. 

 Thinking about it for moment, you realised you could get him back for teasing you earlier. Walking over to the chest of drawers that had your underwear in, you faced away from Jack. Taking a deep breath, you dropped your towel to the floor. 

 You quickly opened the drawer and grabbed some underwear. Before you could even put them on, Jack  pushed you up against the drawers forcefully - not too hard though. 

“Don’t fucking tease me.” Jack groaned in your ear before turning you around and crashing his lips onto yours. Your naked body was pressed against him as he kissed you harshly. Your hands were around his neck, fingers touching the bottom of his hair. 

“Clothes. Off.“ You muttered in between kisses. Jack broke away from you quickly as he pulled off his - Caspar’s - t shirt. As he went back to kissing you, you ran your hands down his chest and along his toned stomach - the contact causing him to moan against your lips which was quite possibly the hottest thing ever. 

 Jack pushed you back so you were laying down on the bed. This was the first time he properly saw your naked body. His eyes scanned you up and down as his tongue poked out of his mouth and swiped his bottom lip. 

 "You’re so fucking sexy.” He said as he leaned down, kissing your neck, your collar bones, your chest, your stomach, your thighs. 

 "J-Jack.“ You moaned out as he kissed closer and closer up your thighs. 

“Mmh.” Jack hummed in response. Before Jack could do anymore, you leaned forward and undid his belt - hoping he’d get the message. Within seconds Jack’s trousers and boxers were both off. 

Your mouth watered when you saw the size of him. You’d always thought he was big - but not that big. You were a little worried about how that would even fit inside of you. 

“Please, Jack.“ You moaned, pulling him down to by the back of his neck. 

"What do you want, baby?” Jack breathed out, grinning at you. 

 "I want you to fuck me.“ You surprised yourself as the words left your mouth, but you couldn’t help it. You needed him right now. 

 "Do you have a condom?” He asked, kissing you again. 

 "On. The. Pill.“ You told him in between kisses. 

 After kissing for a minute, Jack’s hand went to his member as he pumped himself a few times before rubbing his tip up and down your core.

 "Fuck.” You moaned into his neck before sucking and kissing his soft skin. Jack finally eased into you. Your arms went around his neck as you held yourself close to him whilst he thrusted in and out of you. 

 "I’ve waited for this for so long.“ Jack mumbled between thrusts. 

 Your moans and groans echoed throughout the bedroom and the fact that this wasn’t even your bed turned you on even more. One of Jacks hands went to your clit, rubbing it to add more pleasure. 

As you looked up at him, you noticed beads of sweat starting to form on his skin and his dirty blond hair sticking to his forehead. 

 Both your hands went to his cheeks as you looked into his eyes. His breathing was in sync with his thrusts and he stared down at you with eyes full of lust. 

 "I hate you.” You reminded him as he rocked in and out of you. 

 "I hate you more.“ Jack replied, pressing a sweet kiss against your lips which made your stomach do flips. You could feel yourself getting close as your stomach felt tight. Your legs started to shake and your toes curled. 

 "Faster, Jack. I’m close.” You muttered as he kissed you again. 

“Me too, baby.” He breathed out. 

 The way he called you ‘baby’ whilst fucking you like this made your heart melt. Jack picked up pace and the bed began to rock. 

 You moaned out loud as you came around Jack, digging your nails into the top of his back. It didn’t take Jack long to finish either, releasing inside of you. As Jack pulled out of you, he kissed you again. 

 "Think I need another shower.“ You laughed. 

 "I’d be happy to join.” Jack smiled. 

 "Nope.“ You shook your head at him as he rolled off of you. 

 "Why?” He raised his eyebrows, still trying to catch his breath. 

 “I still hate you, remember.“ You reminded him, getting up off the bed. 

“Wow, Y/N, I never thought you’d fuck and chuck me.” Jack laughed as you walked into the bathroom once again. 

Push the button

A/N: My idea for this fic changed a few times because I came up with a series idea….so enjoy the fluff while you can. The relationship between the reader & Jensen has a lot of inspiration from the one I share with my brother-in-law. I basically took something that happened with me & my brother-in-law & adjusted it to fit this story. Enjoy.

Jensen x Sister!Reader

You were scrolling through Facebook while laying on the bed at your brother’s house when JJ came strolling into your room. Looking up from the conversation you were having with your friend on chat you shot JJ a confused look. She looked upset, an emotion you rarely saw on the happy three year old’s face. Placing the laptop on the bed you got up and walked over to her.

“What’s wrong little bird?” You asked her while crouching down to her level.

“Daddy’s leavin’ again tomorrow.” She replied with a pout.

Giving her a sad smile you embraced your niece, “I know,” You told her, “Sucks a lot, doesn’t it?” JJ simply nodded her head as she wrapped her arms around your neck. “Where is your dad anyways?” You questioned her.

“Wif mama, Arrow, and Zeppy.” She responded, letting out a sigh. With JJ’s words you couldn’t help but squeeze her a little tighter. Jensen and Danneel had been worried about JJ feeling left out with the birth of the twins. Their fear had led to them asking you to move in with them. You could help Danneel with the kids, spend time with your family, and it gave you more time to work on the screenplay you had been writing.

Keep reading

Things I haven't said out loud

Five days before my law school finals my mother called me at 8 a.m.

She told me my two younger cousins, my father’s nephews, my uncle’s two sons, the two younger kiddos always running after us the big kids, had been shot and killed in Ciudad Juarez. I spent that night sleeping in the library because I didn’t want to go home. I knew I would never come back if I did.

Three days before finals I walked into my carrels, had a panic attack, held on to my law school friend as I wept, and watched their funeral on Facebook. I wasn’t there.

That night I wrote my statutory interpretation law final through tears and gasps and guilt. I wasn’t there.

I took five finals. After the last one I went out to a very public basketball game because I needed an excuse to keep pushing the pain back and when I was finally home I wailed.

Why am I telling you?? Because I almost gave up. I almost said that this wasn’t as important. This year I made two A’s, a B+, and some B’s. But this year I didn’t care HOW I made it through…. I just wanted to MAKE it through.

Success looks different for everyone. Behind every cute picture and funny post there is a real life. But, I didn’t stop. I didn’t give up. I let it hurt and I stood up and kept walking and reading and typing because that’s what you do… you keep going. Sometimes you fall, either into someone’s arms or into empty space at 3 a.m in the library on top of a computer keyboard and a million practice tests, but what matters is if you get up, if you crawl your way out…

What matters is that you WANT to crawl out of pain and keep living. That’s why I’m telling you this, because I need you to WANT to crawl out of it. Thank you for being my support through this without knowing it. Thank you.

**ATTENTION ARTISTS**
Please Share this! Beware if this person comes to you asking for art! Eric Neely may seem like a dependable commissioner, but I think it needs to come out that he has scammed many artists here on Facebook and Instagram, including myself. Some artist’s we’ve talked to have requested to remain anonymous, but another artist (Jordie) and I have our own testimonies. 

I posted this on Facebook but was advised to also post this on Tumblr as well. So far lots of other artists have come forward saying they were scammed as well. But just in case, I think it needs to circulate here too. 

Eric had bought a commission from me and told me he’d pay in November, but then didn’t pay me until Jan. 6th. (I don’t do art until I’m paid first). 2 weeks after payment he told me his parents were getting suspicious about the art and they wanted a refund, even though he claims he didn’t want it. I assured him that I was working on it and sent him an update.

I finished the drawing on February 19th, and sent it to him, and I didn’t get a response. About a week later, I got a paypal notification that someone requested a refund from me. I asked Eric about it and he claimed it was his cousin’s paypal (Kenneth) and his cousin was the one who did it. He sent me a screen cap of him messaging Kenneth about dismissing the refund, but then didn’t send a screen cap when Kenneth responded. I disputed it with Paypal, but then I was penalized 20 dollars from this “Kenneth” guy’s bank. I talked to paypal about it and they said he requested the refund directly through his bank claiming he didn’t get the “requested item” even though I finished the art.

Eric apologized saying he was so busy with school and hadn’t been on Facebook, even though it said he had seen my messages and he was posting a bunch of pictures of himself to Facebook. When I came out and said he or “Kenneth” owe me 60 dollars (40 for the drawing, 20 for the penalty) didn’t responded to me. He finally messaged me today saying that he was going to get me the money back tomorrow, but I have a hard time believing him. Plus, how do I know whether or not he’ll just refund that money too? He also blocked me immediately after so I couldn’t message him, telling me he’s gonna be away from Facebook to focus on school. Which I know is a load. He also blocked my friend Audra.

Jordie had come to me in November saying Eric wasn’t paying them for art and then buying art from other artists. Jordie was eventually paid, but I came to Jordie when this happened and Jordie had the same thing happen. This is what they had to say:
“Eric requested five pieces of art from me, each cost $10. Took him 2-3 months to finally pay me in full. A month later turns out he used someone else’s paypal account to send me money and Paypal sent me a dispute which held and took the $50 AND a $20 banking fee, and it ended up being taken away from me regardless of me fighting against it. He has yet to do something about it.”

Now it’s not for certain, but Audra, Jordie and I are pretty sure that his cousin “Kenneth” is fake. It just doesn’t add up. I emailed Kenneth myself, as well as tried to add him on Facebook. I got no response. With all the things Eric tried to pull it, we just think it sounds fishy. Regardless, Eric Neely and or his cousin Kenneth Polk took money from us and that’s not OK.

So why am I doing this for just 60 dollars? It’s not because of the money. He’s scammed other artists. I’m sure he’s scammed other artists besides Jordie, I, and the other artists that wish to remain anonymous. I want this out there so people can be aware, and also if others have been scammed by him to come forward. PLEASE SHARE this around! His name is ERIC NEELY on Facebook. He really needs know that what he did is not ok. 

His tumblr is http://neely-kun.tumblr.com

“You’re the only good thing that i have” – Justin Foley x Reader.

Summary: Focus on the last chapter of the serie, specifically when Justin and his “stepfather” discuss and he throws him out of the house, without the boy’s mother saying anything else. This one shot is focused on the topic of friendship rather than something romantic, what happens after, it‘s left to the imagination of the reader.

Words: 3265

Reader’s point of view.

Enjoy it!

Your name: submit What is this?

The smell of butter coming from the kitchen and the sound of the microwave, causes my mouth to water. Finally, whenever I started making popcorn, those three minutes made me eternal. I was amused as I emptied the contents of the bag into a bowl, then I bent down to take out a pot of salsa. Yes it was going to be a great night; I didn’t agree if I thought it sarcastically, or it was true, considering that most of my nights on a Friday were the same. An exhaustive date between Netflix and me; But this evening would be special and not because I expected someone, but because I would have a home alone and could set the television to the highest volume if it hit me. I’m so funny! I laughed at myself as I packed up my supplies on the coffee table. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Mom go downstairs as she finished putting on her earrings; Dad left his study.

“Are you sure you want to be alone, dear?” I turned to see my mother. “You can join us. They adore you”

I chuckled.

“Because I was a little girl, Mom, now I don’t think they found me so funny unless I let them pinch my cheeks … and that won’t happen.” I pointed to her without erasing my smile. I slammed down on the couch and watched my parents get together.

“Why don’t you call one of your friends?” My father said.

“Because they must be in some party. Besides, I don’t have so many friends.” Me and my smile between teasing and trying to be kind. Sometimes I thought my parents didn’t know me at all.

“You didn’t want to go to the party?”

“Not really. Mom, Dad, I’m perfectly fine with staying here.” I raised my arms.

“And Justin?” I didn’t miss the way the man made a face. What father would like his daughter to be home alone with a boy? Even if that boy was my best friend?

“Probably with Jessica.” I smiled.

I knew Justin Foley since childhood, our parents were friends, or at least my mom was for Justin’s mother, then she started to change and finally they ended up moving away. My friendship with the basketball player didn’t flinch and we got along better than ever, except that I should share him constantly with his girlfriend, I didn’t uncomfortable, however, I also got along well with her, but I knew perfectly when I was doing a bad third and when not.

“Seriously, I’m fine; I won’t share my popcorn with anyone.” I looked at them with feigned adoration.“ You’re going to be late with your friends. Adiós

The little bottle of popcorn lay empty on the coffee table, just like my soda, while I stared at the series on the television. I found it interesting to put myself upside down on the couch, wanting to avoid the boredom I had been having for three hours with my eyes on the TV. It would probably be a good idea to go to sleep, but I wasn’t even sleepy. I had no stories to look at at Snapchat and Instagram, for I had already seen all of them. There was nothing good to do and a part of me regretted not having gone even a while to the party, mocking a few, talking to other people and maybe dancing. I’d be back before my parents came back, but they wouldn’t be back for more than two hours, I wouldn’t have time to do some of those things if I left right now, unless I decided to show up in my pretty pajamas.

I paused the series in progress and stood up taking the junk. I washed, dried them and settled in their respective places. I took a few chocolates from Mom, I knew that she would realize that it were missing two, but that it gave more, I felt like a lot. I returned to the room where I dropped into the sofa and took my phone entering Facebook, almost all my “friends” posted photos of the party, I thought I would find some Justin or Jessica but neither of them had posted anything since hours. I shuddered away from my head what those two might be doing. I left the application and before I blocked it, I got a call from Zach Dempsey. I answered.

“What’s up, Zach?”

“Have you heard from Justin?” He asked in a serious tone.

I frowned and sat on the couch looking at my chocolate, wanting to take the wrapper off with one hand. I focused on the background sound on the other side of the line, i could hear a distant noise that could be the TV, but no music. I was surprised that he wasn’t at the party.

“No. Why?”

“He was calling me a couple of hours ago”

“And … why didn’t you answer?” I shrugged, then chewed my chocolate.

I heard him sigh.

“It’s complicated, Y/N”

“Ok … what’s going on?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

“Is there something he need to tell me?” Okay, now I was confused.

Lately I had noticed the guys acting too strange, they all seemed to be alert, scared, worried, even the face of my best friend seemed increasingly exhausted, repentant, lost and even careless. I still didn’t skip the time when he missed class two days and didn’t show up at the team presentation, when I tried to talk to him, he had told me that he just gave him a stomach infection. I didn’t swallow it, since, after that, it was when the change began. And not only did they look that way, I was even present when Clay Jensen got out of control and accused all of us from causing people to commit suicide, or to speak more clearly, of Hannah Baker. Of course it was a sack that I didn’t have flat, in my life, I dealt with that girl, I only learned of her suicide because it became viral in high school. The only thing i knew about her was that she dated for a very short time with Justin, until his “dear” friend Bryce came up to take his phone and roll the photo my best friend had taken from the poor girl. In conclusion, everyone acted as if at any moment a policeman was behind them with a pair of handcuffs. And I didn’t understand why, and when I asked, they made sure to change the subject, so I just stopped insisting that everyone take care of their life. What if it hurt, was that my own best friend seemed less and less trusting me.

“I just wanted to know if you’d heard of him, Y/N, I see no. I’ll see you Monday”

“Zach” I stopped his intention to cut the call. He waited in silence “If he calls you, you talk to me, please”

“Yes”

After his answer I let him hang me. I leaned one end of the phone on my lips as I thought. I couldn’t know for sure where Justin was, doubted that at home, considering that he had told me that his mother had returned with that imbecile, but neither knew where he could have gone and less in his lost and constantly nervous state. The truth is, that lately, Justin Foley seemed a complete stranger in front of me, was no longer the same funny and carefree boy that I had gotten used to and that filled me with impotence when I thought about him, I was supposed to be one of the People who knew him the most, but, how to help him if he wouldn’t let me in? How to help him if i didn’t even know why he is submerged in constant misery? Didn’t he trust me as much as I thought? But if we told ourselves everything!

I sighed and quickly dialed Jessica’s number. I don’t know why I didn’t call him directly, maybe it was because I was scared to know him in trouble or that he would move away, again, and deny my help, but I would come to him even though he hated me for intervening.

At the third bell, she answered.

“I can’t talk now, Y/N” Jessica was crying?

“Are you okay?” I stood up from the impression. What the hell had happened now? “Jessica, talk to me”

“It’s nothing, Y/N, anyway, you don’t know anything” Sharpened her voice and I was offended “Also, why do you want to comfort me? Your best friend is someone else”

“Did Justin do something to you? I wanted to know if you were with him” she didn’t need me, well, I would just ask her the reason for my call and hang up.

“He was here, yes, and I hope I don’t have him around anymore,” she shouted.

“Jessica…”

But for the second time in the night, I was left alone with the phone in my ear. I went to Justin’s contact and undoubtedly called, but his phone jumped right into the mailbox almost immediately. This asshole had rejected my call. I locked the phone and dropped it on my side. I got tired of trying to help my friends somehow, no one seemed to want to trust me and Jessica had treated me badly. I snorted and rested my elbows on my knees as well as my chin in my hands. What kind of friends had I got? They brought something and completely excluded me from that. Now Justin and Jessica, what problem in paradise now existed? I had never heard her so aggressive and with so much hatred towards my friend, something very big had to happen between them and I was worried, for both of them, at least I knew that Jess was apparently good, but where the hell was the boy? When I discovered and found him, i would give him a good blow.

At least the boredom had passed and I had something to occupy my mind. A case that had no clue and I didn’t even know how to find them.

My phone lit up and I picked it up quickly. Justin’s name lay in the middle of the screen with a new message, I opened it as fast as the artifact allowed me.

I’m outside your house, can you go out for a moment?

I looked at one of the windows, until that moment I had noticed that it had begun to rain. I bit my lip and got to my feet leaving the phone on the couch. Going out in my pajamas was too much, considering that it was urgent to see that my friend was perfectly well, then I would take him to drag him all over the block, to worry me about this way. I took my jacket and my keys and opened the door, there, in the middle of my garden, was my best friend, drenched, hands in his pockets, his sports bag hanging from his body and staring into mine. His appearance looked just like the last few weeks when we had barely spoken, now we were in front of the other and even though i hated to admit it, i felt really uncomfortable.

I spit it out and ended up leaving the house and going into the rain. I slowly descended the porch steps and walked toward it, leaving a considerable distance between the two. Immediately I noticed his swollen eyes, he had been crying and it hurt me that i didn’t know anything about his new, almost permanent condition. I crossed my arms waiting for him to start talking. Neither of us seemed to disturb the rain.

“I know I’ve been pushing you away for a long time.” I raised my eyebrows. He continued, “And I’m so sorry, Y/N, you’re my best friend, I didn’t want to see you getting muddled in this mess; I needed an escape, know that there was still something good and that was you”

“An escape from what, Justin? Your way of acting lately … and that of everyone else? ”

“It’s more complicated than it seems. I didn’t want to tell you, because …”

“You know what? I know that things have gone very bad, and now you come to tell me that you argued with Zach and then you ended up with Jessica, then you remember that at last you have a best friend who cares about you and you come to use it as a cloth of tears” I had been affected by all this, and right now I realized that.

“What?”

“Zach called me a while ago, he told me you called him and he didn’t answer” Justin looked down “Then I called Jessica … who practically sent me to hell for being your so-called best friend. So I guess you’re just coming in to let off steam about that, that’s your problem, Foley.”

“I wish that was just my problem.” He approached me. “I’m an imbecile, Y/N, and that’s why I’ve been losing my friends slowly, even to my girlfriend, Jessica doesn’t want to know about me anymore. I know that if you knew what was happening, right now we wouldn’t be talking outside your house”

“And risking hypothermia” I said “Let’s go in” I suggested.

“Don’t. It will be easier here, you won’t have to ask me to leave you alone”

“What are you talking about, Justin?” I retreated “Who the hell did you kill to act like that?”

“I don’t want to lose you, Y/N”

“You know something? You really are missing out on me. For weeks I tried to help you without knowing what is happening to you, but you throw me away, you tell me not to worry when it is impossible not to do it, and even reject my calls. Now you come here, with me, telling me all this, because I bet, you no longer have anyone else. I’m your last choice, aren’t I?”

I was going to march to lock myself in my house, but he stopped me.

“I didn’t want to come to you!” I looked at him wounded “I didn’t want to do it because I didn’t want to poison you in this hunt” I was about to protest but he silenced me “You’re good, impeccable and graceful. Since the beginning of all this I have needed you desperately, I know that your words will always lift me, but to listen to them you need to know the truth. And I’m not sure you want to hear it”

“Talk about a goddamn time, Foley” I hissed.

“I’m sorry that you’re going to change the perspective you have on me. You have been a true friend to me”

Justin took my hand and took me to take shelter on the porch of my house, was seriously the fact that he didn’t want to enter. My friend had really done something wrong and now I wasn’t so sure I wanted to hear it.

“You remember Jessica’s party.” he started a little nervous. I nodded, how could I forget that party? My neighbor and also friend, Jeff Atkins, had died that night. “She and I were drunk … too”

“I know. I saw you” I murmured.

“We went to her room.” He paused, his eyes filled with tears. “But she was almost unconscious to go on with what we were planning …”

“Justin” I felt breathless.

“I did nothing but lay her down on her bed and cover her with a sheet. She fell asleep and my intention was to take care of her until she felt better.” I nodded following the thread of his story. “When I left her room I stayed at her door for a long time” He took a breath. "Then Bryce appeared, he was drugged and began to insist In that he wanted to enter the room, I told him that Jess was in there very badly. I wasn’t going to let him in.” I covered my mouth as I felt my heartbeat increase. “He manipulated me and entered the room, when I realized what would happen, I tried to remove him, but he pushed me out of the room and closed the door securely …”

“Stop it!” I practically screamed and closed my eyes. I could imagine what had happened then and now I understood why Jessica was crying and her sudden hatred of Justin. My head started to spin.

“I’m sorry” he sobbed.

I looked at him.

“It’s been weeks since that … And you barely spoke?” I chuckled, consumed with horror. Poor Jessica.

Then he explained me that it wasn’t by his will that he had to tell his girlfriend about what happened that night, she didn’t even know it, instead he brainwashed her with lies. Justin began to tell me that it had all started by tapes that Hannah Baker had left after her death, or rather, it came to them after. In these tapes, she explained the reasons why she decided to end her life and in each one spoke about someone specific and the actions they did against her and that led her to cut their veins and bleed in the tub. In one of those tapes, Hannah explained that she was in that room where Bryce Walker had raped Jessica Davis. At least those were Justin’s words.

“I think I’m going to vomit” I mumbled, looking away. “So … Is that why they’re acting like someone is going to kill them? On those tapes Hannah talks about you … about Zach, Jessica, Bryce, and how many more?” Justin nodded.

“I was the first … because of that damn photo that Bryce took”

“God, Justin, why didn’t you tell me?” He blinked confused.

“Are you not upset with me?”

“Of course I am! You’re an idiot and I shouldn’t forgive you! But it hurts me more than you haven’t trusted me”

“Like I said, I didn’t want to poison you with this. I didn’t want to lose you”

“Is that why you’re outside of your house at this hour?”

“Losing my girlfriend, a friend and now my best friend” He pointed at me “It’s not the only bad thing that happened to me this day”

“What else happened to you?”

“My mother’s boyfriend threw me out of the house after reading a summons”

“A summons?”

“Because of Hannah, they found evidence that points us … and well” He shrugged “I have nowhere to stay, they all turned their back on me, I know Bryce won’t do it but I don’t want to see him. Anyway, I’m sorry, Y/N, thank you for being my best friend”

He went down the steps of my house. I almost let him go but I snorted. At first i didn’t intervene because i knew nothing and he didn’t tell me, but now that he had done it, i couldn’t ignore our years of friendship and that he has always supported me. He will be an accomplice to a very serious crime, but i couldn’t bear to know that he was wandering the streets all night.

“Hey, idiot” I called him. He turned.

I walked resolutely toward him and hugged him. I wasn’t going to belong to that group that turned their back on him, because I wasn’t like them. I hadn’t done anything wrong and I wanted Justin, not to help him bother me for the rest of the night and maybe for the rest of my life in this place.

Masterlist

I took this directly from my facebook, yes.

But seriously, my b-day is on July 18th! And all I want is work, as usual. I will do nearly any artwork, I will read tarot cards and runes, I will make you cosplay props and costume pieces. Just ask and ye shall receive, for a price.

I need to pay off bills for this month and next, and bus tickets to my friend’s house, and then I get myself outside employment. That’s about $700 at this point.

All the info is available on my artblog sidebar; @sailerscrimshaw

Okay, I’ve done it again. I just can’t help myself. I don’t know what’s going on with me but Yousana has really stolen my heart and I have so many feelings and the only way I can deal with them is writing even though I’m not a writer at all, like I know I’m not really good. It helps that you are all being so amazingly kind to me, you’re inspiring me.

This time I decided to focus more in Yousef, especially his relationship with Elias. I guess you could say Elias is the real mvp of this fic. 

Again, like I said before, please know that this is written with all my respect for the muslim religion. I would never dare to be disrespectful towards any of you. And if you feel like this somehow disrepects you please let me know and I’ll erase it because the last thing I know is to upset any of you. 

This is just me trying to cope with my feelings after yesterday’s clip.

I hope you like it, those of you who take the time to read it.

She still hadn’t answered. Almost 24 hours later and she still hadn’t answered. As soon as he had sent that text he knew that everything was about to change. He had tried to avoid the issue since they had started texting but when she told him that she would try to make her mom believe that he was a good muslim he knew he had to tell the truth. She deserved to know, even if it meant that things between them would be over before even starting.

He hadn’t seen her since last night either. Any other Saturday he would’ve been at the Bakkoush’s with Elias and the rest of the squad but he had managed to convince everyone to go to his house instead. He knew that he needed to keep his distance from Sana, at least until she’d decide to talk to him. It was her choice now and he would respect it whatever it was.

 That didn’t mean that he didn’t have hope that she still would answer him. He had spent the day checking his phone every five minutes, his heart beating faster and faster every time it beeped with a message. He would unblocked his screen with trembling hands only to have his heart broken again each time he’d find that the text he had just received wasn’t from Sana, but from his mom or some other acquaintance.

 This, of course, hadn’t gone unnoticed by his best friend, Elias. He knew something was bugging him but he also knew that Yousef didn’t like to share his feelings with other people so he waited till the rest of the boys had left to talk about it.

 Yousef was still looking at his phone when Elias approached him.

 “Okay dude, what’s going on with you?”

Yousef looked at his friend who was standing in front of him with a concerned look on his face.

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Yousef, it’s me, you can try to pretend that you’re cool with the others but not with me. I know something’s going on with you since yesterday and I want to know what so I can help you”

“I’m telling you Elias, I’m fine”

“And I’m telling you, I don’t buy it”

“Whatever” Yousef said standing up from the couch and walking by Elias.

“Does this have something to do with my sister?”Elias said making Yousef stop dead on his tracks.

He slowly turned around to look at Elias in shock. He wished he hadn’t heard well, he wished his friend hadn’t just said what he thought he had. He couldn’t know.

“I’m going to ask you this once, just once Yousef and I really hope you answer me with the truth. What’s going on between you and my sister? And don’t tell me it’s nothing because I don’t believe it. I’m not stupid.”

“Nothing is going on…”

“Yousef.”

“…anymore. Nothing is going on anymore” The truth of his words made Yousef want to cry. Because that was it. Nothing was going, not anymore.

“What do you mean by that? What happened between you two?”

“I screwed up Elias, I screwed up big time” he took a deep breath trying to keep the tears away just like he had been doing the whole day.

“Okay, okay Yousef, relax. Take it easy” Elias said when he saw the state his friends was in “Come here, sit and tell me everything”

“You’re going to hate me” Yousef said but he obeyed his friend and sat on the couch next to him.

“Yousef, I’m trying really hard to stay calm, it’s my sister who you’re talking about. But you’re my best friend and I’m willing to listen to you so please, just be honest and tell me what’s going on”

“I like Sana, Elias. I like her a lot” he said with a huge sigh.

“Okay that I already knew. I mean do you think I don’t see the way you look at each other? And I know yesterday you took the blame for her, not for me.”

“Yesterday…”

“Wait, is that what this is about? Do you think what? That my parents will give you a hard time or something?”

“No, no, it’s not that, it’s not that” he took a deep breath before continuing “After we left the house yesterday, she texted me”

“You text each other…”Elias said raising his eyebrows

“It’s really new, I added her on facebook last week and we started talking about random things, I honestly just wanted to make her laugh”

“So when I said that you two were flirting in the kitchen that day I was right, you were”

Yousef only looked at his friend not really knowing what to say.

“Okay, okay, I’m not judging, I’m not judging, continue. She texted you last night. What did she say?”

“She said…” he covered his face with his hands trying to gain strength to continue “She said she would convince your mom that I’m a good muslim even though I drink vodka” he mumble between his hands.

“But…Yousef, you’re not…I mean you don’t…”

Yousef looked at his friend and bit his bottom lip while nodding.

“I know…and now she knows too. I told her the truth yesterday and she hasn’t answered since and to be honest that doesn’t surprise me. Go on, yell at me, tell me how I shouldn’t have approached her in the first place when I knew what would happen, even punch me if you want, I deserve it”

“I’m not going to punch you, you dickhead”

“I should’ve told her sooner, I know I should’ve told her. I just…it felt so good to talk to her. I thought…I thought that maybe if I waited a little bit longer she and I would connect you know? Like really connect and that eventually when I would tell her, we would find a way to work things out. But yesterday, I couldn’t just lie to her, it’s one thing not to tell the truth and another to lie. And to think that I’ve put so much effort in trying to get her to like me and now…she and me, it’s impossible. And don’t tell me it’s not because you know it is”

“I’m not going to tell you it’s not impossible, Yousef”

Yousef’s heart broke a little more because as much as he was trying to convince himself, deep down he wanted to hear his friend giving him some hope.

“But I’m not going to tell you that it is impossible either” Elias continued “Because it’s not my call. It’s hers and it’s yours. If you want my opinion, all I can tell you is that I can’t think of someone better for my sister than you, you’re my best friend and the nicest guy I know and I want the best for my little sister. And yes, I would’ve preferred if you had told her sooner because you knew how much her faith means to her. But again, it’s not my decision. It’s between you and her.”

 He had spent the whole day trying to keep the tears away but right now Yousef couldn’t help but let some roll down his face.

“She won’t talk to me Elias, you know that.”

“Maybe not now, but give her time. It’s a lot to process.”

“I don’t even know if she liked me back or if it was all in my head”

“Believe me, she likes you, I know my sister, I know the way she looks at you. She likes you but you have to give her time and space so she can think about what she wants. Just don’t give up on her yet. Let her come to you when she’s ready to talk and whatever decision you two make it’ll be the best for you whether it is moving forward or stop everything at all.”

Yousef nodded while wiping away the tears from his face.

“Thank you. Seriously Elias, I needed this.”

“That’s what friends are for”

 —————————————————————————

Sana? Are you in there?” Elias said knocking at his sister’s door. “Come on sis, let me in”

“What do you want Elias?” She said opening the door and letting him in.

She was a having a hell of a day and she didn’t want to listen to his brother, she knew he was probably there to lecture her about the party from last night.

“I’ve talked to him Sana, I’ve talked to Yousef”

Sana froze in the place. She had been holding the tears for so long, trying to be strong but she couldn’t take it anymore. It started slowly, only a couple of tears but as they continue rolling down her face she couldn’t help but continue crying until it turn into a uncontrollable sob.

“Come here” Elias said pulling her in a hug.

She didn’t remember the last time she had hugged his brother but right now it was all she needed so she let him.

“What am I going to do?” She mumbled against Elias’ shirt.

“You don’t have to do anything. Not right now. You can take all the time you need to think. It’s up to you Sana, no one is going to judge you whatever you decide”

He felt her nod but he didn’t let go. Instead he hugged her tighter and rested his chin above her head.

“It’s okay, it’s all going to be okay” he whispered, and he sure wished it was the truth. 


Okay, this is it. Again I’m sorry this is too long. And I hope this doesn’t upset anyone in any way. 

Thank you so so much for reading it means the world to me.

I hope you like it and it’s okay if you don’t.

Also sorry for the grammar english is not my first language and I suck at descriptions.

Thank you again!

Choices - Part 1

Originally posted by markleetrashh

Part 1 | Part 2

Genre: angst, fluff

Pairing: Mark x Reader, Johnny x Reader

*REQUESTED* Can you do a scenario where you are Mark’s classmate in college and he likes you, whilst Johnny who happens to be an upperclassman but was your tutor back in high school likes you too? And you are kinda torn between them and don’t know who to choose. You can put her up with anyone toward the end, your wish. I just want romance with both of them being into her and confusion on her part. TIA ❤

“Y/N?”

You turned to see a familiar face, but you weren’t sure where you knew him from. For some reason, you couldn’t think. You smiled as you walked toward the booth that he was sitting in.

He said, “Remember me?”

Keep reading

Nighthawk

I was fifteen when I realised that my imagination was the strongest force I would ever feel.

My mum knew too and she knew I was up to something. I scrambled around pulling on jumpers I owned and then threw them repetitively back onto the floor of my bedroom with an audible angst. I hadn’t eaten any dinner. I had pulled straighteners through my thick curls over and over and filled the room with plumes of smoke as they singed through my tangled hair.

“Sophie has fallen out with her mum again and wants me to meet her in the field behind her house.”

“It is cold, why don’t you just invite her here and we can all talk it through?”

“She’s been crying, she is too embarrassed”

My mum smiled and I blushed.

“I am pleased you girls look out for each other”.

She knew I was telling a lie, she had witnessed the tell tale signs, my wavering shoe gaze and freshly made up face at 22.00 on a school night but having once been a teenage girl herself she kindly ignored my lie and told me to “be careful”, her own sort of blessing.

It was cold. This far into the countryside the stars shone like they were at a party in sequined dresses. The lack of pollution prohibited any heat from the day from lingering and I shivered feeling a direct closeness to the universe. I was fifteen and at the center of it.

I had asked him to meet me four doors down from my house, which I told him was “the one with the most flowers”. I spun a few more lies for fun; I told him I was with friends behind the wooden stile drinking wine. I wanted him to think he flowed into my sociable evening, not that I had been cross-legged on the floor of my bedroom for the last hour reading Anais Nin thinking of this moment. The night was so full and heavy, I smiled knowing I had yesterday eaten all my carrots in preparation but I knew the trees and the brambles like I knew the crack in my bedroom ceiling and so could enjoy the woozy mixture of bravery and fear, which I guess they call rebellion.

I stood in the alleyway in silence and I waited.

After five minutes some headlights slowed and my phone vibrated. There he was in a car on the other side of the road- my future. I climbed over the stile with my hood up; the single strand of hair fell down on purpose. His tall frame was hunched over in the old mini cooper; I couldn’t see his face, just his luminous BFG silhouette in the single street lamp. I tried to open the door but couldn’t seem to get the latch right. He lent over and opened it for me.

“Hi”

“Hey”

I shrank into my hood and turned my gaze to my 15-dernier tights, which I picked at with devout concentration. He didn’t say anything but he didn’t need to, there was music on and we started to drive out of my village towards the town. He’d said he needed to fill up his car so I guessed that was where we were headed. I was so full of awe. I stared at his curled hands on the wheel of a vehicle that could move foreword at a rate of 30 mph or more, a whole vessel rattling along with us enclosed. Driving was the best way to get to know someone, both concealed in the foreword gaze, gaining distance if nothing else. I turned my face to study his, lucky that his eyes must stay fixed on the road giving me a moment to study the corners of his jaw, where the headlights hit his nose, the shaking human hairs that covered it like lit up grass and in its shadow, caved his eyes into darkness. I was trying to take a picture in my mind of the beginning of the rest of my life. I guessed he was thinking of something wild and serene like a renaissance painting or a Keats poem. He looked kind and nervous. In short I was in love.

I had imagined all these scenarios about what might happen if we were to meet. Words would tumble out of our mouths and erupt into bursts of laughter, we’d drive, taking it in turns with no regard for the law to a coastal town where we would crack open a pink lobster on a sun warmed step, the sea water licking our toes. I would write letters to my friends back at school, who would writhe around in jealousy while we discussed real questions that exceeded my age group, good and evil, the teachings of Freud… I had taken everything I wanted out of life and encased it all in his image, the ones I had clicked repetitively over on Facebook. I decided that I would fill him with ideas and polish all of his lacking thoughts so that he could be perfect, and I could be his. Young girls in love were selfless.

We were still driving in silence; I was feeling calmer now and in tune with my thoughts. I took down my hood and hummed along to ‘when the sun hits’. Why wasn’t he saying anything? I wanted to surprise him with my adaptability, my ability to compliment and to laugh. The car pulled up at the petrol station and he swung his long limbs out to pour petrol into the car. I felt it flowing into the engine and giving me courage. The petrol station shone in artificial light like the bar in Nighthawks. I thought, “I will tell this to him and he will be impressed”. I got out of the car and propped my arms onto the roof with my hair falling down my back, I was shaking like a cat in fur. He looked at me and walked in the opposite direction.  I would have done anything for him.

When he came back to the car I compared our scene with the painting. He said he hadn’t seen it and that he thought art was ‘pretentious’. I pondered the word, which I have never liked. Then he smiled with his teeth, put his hand on my head and said:

“You shouldn’t attempt to understand things that aren’t useful’

I smiled back and the corners curled down. If I were a painting I would be wielding a weapon. As we started to drive again I felt a strange new feeling cloud my previous awe it was like disappointment with a backbone. Had I made him up inside my head? I wanted to watch his face say something that would inspire me in the same way the idea of him had so unfairly moved me. I stared at him, like I might look at the taxidermy dodo in Tring museum whose feathers were rotting and frowned. The lights in the road rolled away under us, cat eyes winking with a knowing nod. We were getting closer to my house, my favorite trees a canopy of lit up leaves and I was almost grateful. The music started to interest me, it’s floating shoe gaze words cut through the scene.  A wash of carefully selected notes played on instruments somebody looked at and loved. I came back to myself. We pulled up onto the curb. He looked over with questioning eyes and was different. I smiled and got out. The night seemed warmer now, my vision focused and my head clear and full of wonder.

Through the window in the kitchen I could see my mum, reading in the corner with her glasses on and wild hair tumbling around her face and felt all that awe settle on her in her simple solitude. I went to read with her and felt my heart get stronger.

A Little Mistake Messenger

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7 Ch. 8  Ch. 9 Ch. 10


Summary:  MC has exciting news to tell Zen and the other RFA members. That is until the MC gets a shock from Zen. MC finds comfort in a close friend, Jumin Han.

Rating: M (language and adult themes)

Tags: Mystic Messenger, Jumin x MC, Zen x MC

Authors Note: I’ve been working on a 707 series while also working at this story as well. So that’s exciting! I hope my Jumin fanatics like myself reallllly enjoy this chapter. I’ve been listening to a Firefly music festival playlist for a lot of inspiration to get my butt in gear. 

I’d love to hear from you guys about what you like or what I can improve upon. Keep liking and sharing to spread the love <3 

Lazy weekends were the best weekends especially after Jumin got home from his business trip. Jumin was napping soundly on the couch Elizabeth the third purring on his chest with his hand on her body. I smiled to myself as I watched the two of them snoozing the afternoons away. I grabbed a blanket and gently laid it across his legs and on lower part of his chest. His top shirt buttons casually unbuttoned. Elizabeth moved in his arms at the startle of the blanket but settled back into her position once she realized I had helped her out.

I sat back down on the lounge chair and scrolled through my phone.

MC has logged into the Chatroom—

Jaehee: I’m relaxing at the beach getting some sun.

707: I burn to a crisp in the sun

Oh MC is here!

MC: Jaehee how is vacation going?

Jaehee: You can keep my job forever if you would like. 

Has Jumin ran you up a wall yet?

MC: hahaha hardly. 

Everything is good on our end, however business end is a different story.

Jaehee: What happened was it his father again?

MC: not quite Mr. Han per say more like Jumin’s fiance.

707: wait hes engaged that damn bastard

MC: no don’t misunderstand this is not his choosing.

Jaehee: and what happened?

MC: they may or may not believe that Jumin and I are-

Jaehee: He did what?

MC: Its just a misunderstanding, until Jumin can collect enough information to refuse this marriage proposal.

707: Oh thank God! 

I was worried that I would have to come save you from Jumins clutches. 

Defender of Justice to save the innocent MC from the gate keeper Jumin.

MC: all good on this end here! 

Seven don’t worry I’ll know who to call to save me next time.

707: All is well then.

Defender.

Of.

Justice.

Out.

-707 has logged out-

Jaehee: I have to go too I need another drink.

MC: Don’t have too much fun you have to come back soon!

Jaehee: No promises here.

–Jaehee has logged out—

 It was inevitable that I would run into Zen news on my Facebook page. South Korean Musical Actor Trending in the United States of America. I quickly scrolled past the news page my friends shared on Facebook. Hyun Ryu and Amelia Corina officially an item? I turned my phone over trying to ignore the burning feeling in my heart. 

I could not tear my eyes away at his calm and collected mannerism. Did he even lose any sleep over me? He looked as if he didn’t spend too much time letting a breakup hinder his acting and public appearance. Hyun was somebody now, and I was just holding him back. It took me a week and RFA taking turns keeping my mind occupied before I was finally composed enough to be alone.

Why was I craving to see him, was it because he was happy and doesn’t seem to be too worried about a cheating scandal? I still cared for Zen. I will always love him in some way or the other. I cant forget the man that he was before things started to go downhill. Still, I can admire him from afar. Maybe one day Jaehee and I can fangirl over him and we can bring the baby to watch Zen on the TV.

There were thousands of pictures mostly of Zen, and selfies on date nights. Late nights under the stars, his motorcycle, backstage at his musicals. Was he happy? Was he finally accomplishing his dreams? Did the woman in the new pictures know how he likes his DVD collection at home? How he snores lightly when he’s exhausted from a long night of drinking?

I looked at my camera roll on my phone hesitant to look at the beginning. If I wanted a clean slate I needed to delete photos off of my phone. It was going to be now or never. I selected every photo, video, selfie, and saved screen shots I had saved since I met him. I quickly hit the delete button before my heavy fingers would change their mind. Clearing out all the memories, and moments that I treasured the most with Zen. I took a deep breath as I emptied my trash bin on my phone.

I felt as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I could start looking forward to cute baby pictures. I finally opened my text messages and deleted any and every message with Zen involved in it. It would be better to rid myself of the temptation to look back and feel sorry about myself. I smiled to myself that I was finally released from a large amount of temptation to look at those photos that brought me so much happiness.

I was startled by Elizabeth crawling in my lap. I looked over at Jumin who was lazily stretching out on the couch with a loud groan. I pet her soft white fur as she sat down between my legs encouraging me to pet her.

“Have you decided to sit with the ladies?” I said to Elizabeth who was enjoying extra attention from another person.

She cozied herself up on my knee and sprawling out. “She just wants more attention” Jumin said groggily and I laughed at her cute little face and tail.

“Jumin, Elizabeth the Third needs a womanly figure in her life to keep her straight. Sometimes it’s good to take a short reprieve from her favorite and only man in her life.”

He laughed and sat up on the couch, blanket wrapped around his shoulders and hair disheveled in all directions. I smiled to myself at his rare and slightly appearance. Jumin would hate to look like a mess in front of anyone.

“What are you smiling at?” He asked looking at me seated on the edge of the couch arms resting on his legs.

“Nothing!” I told him scratching behind Elizabeth’s ears averting his stare and blush on my cheeks. I took out my phone and took a quick picture of Elly. I knew who to send this picture to, Seven. Seven immediately responded with heart emojis: “Elly my love! She is so adorable! Jumin however looks like he just woke up with the bad case of bed head.”

“Wait was I in that picture that you just took?” He asked sitting upright on the couch. “Maybe. A lady never divulges her secrets Jumin.” I teased and he smirked. “Can I see it?” He asked softly.
I got up and sat next to him on the couch and showed him the picture.

“God is that what my hair looks like?” He ran a hand through it in an attempt to fix it only making it stick further out. I laughed uncontrollably at his hair and his expression when he asked me if it looked any better. He got up and went to his room. “Can you help me since my efforts have been to no avail.”

“Yes Jumin.” I sat on the top of the couch and had him between my legs. “Let me know if I pull your hair.”

I carefully brushed his hair back towards my body. “Have you ever worn it any other way or has it always looked like this?”

“Its been the same for as long as I can remember.”

“Jumin have you ever been in relationships with other women before?”

“What?”

“I didn’t mean for it to sound like that, I just never have seen you show interest in many women our age. Nothing is wrong with that I was just wondering.”

“Women are out for my fathers money and influence not so much myself. The way to my fathers heart seems to be through winning me over. None of them actually cared for me or was around long enough for one anyways. Most women only see me as money and future CEO.”

“I understand your difficulty then finding someone you can actually trust and talk too aside from V and Rika.”

“Yes it was only them for a while but now that V is absent and Rika passed I only have Elizabeth.”

“You have me too Jumin.”

“I know and I’m thankful for some sanity in the madness.” He sighed deeply. “How does it look?”

“It doesn’t look half bad pulled back.” I said and he got up to look at himself.

“If I didn’t look old before this makes me look much older now.”

“I think you look mature, well you already looked mature. More mature.” I said shuffling down to the couch.

“You think I would scare Jaehee if I wore it like this?” He asked smiling as he ruffled his hair out with a shake of his head and hair returned to its normal position on his head.

“I think she would think something was wrong.” He smiled shaking his head.

“What were you doing earlier on your phone? You looked upset?” He asked concerned tone in his voice.

“Hmm oh I was just deleting photos.”

“Of him?”

“Yes of him.” Silence deafened between the two of us before he spoke again.

“You still love him?”

“I don’t love him now but I think I always will hold a place for him. There is a baby that will probably remind me of Zen every day soon.”

“Is love a strange and powerful emotion?” He asked sitting back down on the couch his arms reclined back on the couch behind him. I looked at his face searching himself for some grasp on his tone and curiosity.

“Love?” How do I describe love?

“Well love is different for everyone,” I tried to explain. “Theres the love you have for your family or your father. The love you have for your friends V, Seven, Yoosung, and Jaehee. Finally there is romantic love that you feel towards another person.”

“I love Elizabeth the Third, is that more a familial love?”

“Yes exactly shes a part of your family.”

“Familial love is similar to when Yoosung and Seven talk about chocolate milk and cat jokes?” I nodded my head smiling. Jumin trying to make mental connections to the emotions he was feeling and putting a name to the emotion and it was written on a furrowed line on his forehead. The wrinkle he gets when he is deep in concentration and deep thought. He was silent again before he spoke up once more. 

“What about romantic love?” His asked softly in my direction. 

I took my time trying to find the right words in which to describe romantic love to him that would make the most sense. Your heart starts racing uncontrollably out of your chest around them. Your face gets red when they say anything remotely similar to flirting.” He nodded his head. “Do you find it hard to eat when you think about them?” he asked genuinely. “I think so depending on the situation.”

He met my eyes in an instant, “I think I know what it is.” His hand rested on top of my hand his eyes locked with mine. His fingers grasping onto the sides of my hand and making small circular motions with his pointer finger. I took a deep intake of air before speaking “Romantic or passionate love for another person I think is when you put the other person before yourself, and you worry not just for your needs but for theirs and in a more intimate way. Physically and mentally.” 

His dark eyes stared into my own and I was memorized at the deep color of them as our eyes locked onto one another. “I think I know what it is,” he said moving closer to me on the couch. My face felt warm under his intense stare. Jumin closed the space that was between his lips within inches of my own. I closed my eyes in anticipation of his warm lips to meet mine. His hand sliding to the back of my head. 

There was a loud knock on the door. I immediately sat back and lowered my eyes to avert his own. He cleared his throat and buttoned his shirt to check the door. 

“Jumi! I came to-“ a loud and shrilling high pitched voice pierced through the air and could only belong to the voice of a red-haired, overly perfumed woman in a purple dress.

“This is not a good time Sarah.” Jumin said and she barged into his home. Sarah threw open the door that Jumin was guarding. He palmed his head in frustration. .

“Oh shes here.” I shifted in my seat making sure my little baby bump was hidden from her watchful eye. Shit. The ultrasound was on his fridge. This could implicate Jumin already more than he already was.

“shes my lover of course she would be here.” Jumin said coming to sit by me leaning on the sofa arm casually.

“I brought something for Liz!”

“Elizabeth the third?” Jumin corrected

“yes the cat,” Sarah snared back at him.

I slowly got up to make my way over to the fridge. “Shall I let you two discuss?”

“No I want you to stay.” Jumin said grabbing my hand from my side. I turned to look at him and his expression pleading for help. His slim fingers intertwined into my own.

“So how did you two officially meet?”Sarah asked trying to latch herself onto Jumin. Her breasts spilling out of her top as she attempted to press herself to his arm. Jumin immediately shook her off in disgust and need for personal space. I gave him some space as he tried to push her off of him. 

“Well-“ I started when Jumin chimed in. 

“She is the coordinator for RFA parties for a while, and-“

“I have no interest in Jumin’s businesses, he’s a genuinely kind man with a huge heart.” I added as i looked at Sarah who looked like she bit into something sour and bitter. 

 “Romantic love will never last.”

Her comment struck a nerve deep within me. 

“I know that, more than anyone.” She started going through my papers i had laying on the dining room table. I stepped in front of her putting the papers back to their location.

“You have a limited amount of time with the people you love than you spend that time doing just that.”

“I have a right to see what those documents are since I am his fiance.”

“No you don’t. and No you are not. You can leave the gift for Elizabeth on the table and then escort yourself out.” I was fuming with annoyance. Jumin was smirking behind me at how little patience I had for this woman.

“Jumin are you going to let her speak to me in such ways? I know you are faking this relationship with your secretary. Wont you let me comfort you?”

“I find no issue with her tone.Is that so? We are faking it?” He said questionably at her comment. His arms folded against his chest in annoyance.

“MC.” Jumin said grabbing my arm and pulling myself towards him closely. He felt like he was on fire from the heat he was exuding.

“I want to be honest with my feelings for you. I had intentions on letting our relationship grow however I ant deny that there is a strong attraction to you. I cannot hold myself back any longer.”

“Jumin-“

I felt his hand on my chin and he pressed his lips firmly against mine. My mind went blank at his tender kiss. I wanted more. I needed more. But I also needed to breathe before I was consumed in his heat. I looked into Jumins eyes that were tenderly looking into my own. I don’t know how long we stood there just looking at each other. 

“You would kiss her in front of your own fiance!” Sarah screamed and loudly screaming at us both. Sarah must have let herself out on her own because I was too busy letting Jumin consume me with his tender kisses. Jumins hand placed behind my head. My hands holding tightly onto his shirt. I let my guard down and allowed myself to initiate the kiss again and pressed myself into his warm and soft lips. His tongue tracing around my lip as if asking for permission from my lips to enter.

He was the first to pull away his head resting on mine. “I have been wanting to kiss you for a long time now.” He smiled kissing my head as if I were a child. 

“Did you mean what you said earlier?”

“All of it.” He just held me tightly against his chest. 

“I have never felt this much before I met you.” He whispered into my ear and I smiled knowing that he was becoming more open with himself and allowing himself to feel. He pressed his lips against mine as if he was trying to consume the air in my lungs. My lips brushing against his over and over again.

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Hii!!

New prompt! This is a mix of all the prompts I received about yesterday’s clip.

The prompts were:

“ I have a prompt request if it'a okay because I love the bakkoush siblings and Yousana :) Based on the latest “Ramadan” clip : Elias is angry at Yousef and confront him. “

“ Prompt after the newest clip of sadness, (please only get to this if you have time) Elias pov, talking some god damn sense into Yousef about what he’s doing. Cus Elias doesn’t have time for nonsense like this. “

“ Hellooo I have a prompt if you are looking for ideas: Elias grilling Yousef about what’s going on with him and Noora (I’ll let you decide whether he lets on that he ships yousana haha). Also possibly Sana overhears?? “

“ I have a prompt. Sorry, I know you probably have so many, but I want things to be okay, even if everything is so sad now. So I was thinking that while Sana was in her room, crying, Yousef will come back to the boys and he will be sad and will tell them everything, he will start to cry and then he will ask permission to Elias to let him see Sana and he will go to her room and she will not let him enter, but he would do that anyway and they will see each other crying and they will fix everything.”

“ Hi! Okay so I know you already wrote something about Elias confronting Yousef but I wanted to ask if you could write something about Yousef finding out what the boys said to Elias and realizing that Sana could have heard them and Elias could have thought he was playing with her sister’s feelings… let me know if you decide to write it! “


So I decided to make a mix of all these prompts. I didn’t want to make Elias angry or violent or anything like this because I think that being Ramadan he would want to try and be patient with him and understand him. 

I hope that you like it and that it doesn’t upset anyone.

————————————-x———————–

Elias was still shocked and angry about Adam’s and Mikael’s revelation about Yousef meeting Noora when his friend joined them.

“Hey, I’m sorry I’m late” Yousef said greeting each boy with a hand shake

When he got to Elias, though, he didn’t returned the greeting and just stared at him

“Where were you?” Elias asked

“Just out, dealing with some stuff” Yousef said shrugging

“It’s that how people call it these days?” Mikael asked laughing

“What are you talking about?” Yousef asked confused

“I know you were with Noora” Elias said bitterly

Yousef widened his eyes at that comment and looked at the rest of his friends trying to figure out how he could know

“Mikael and me saw you and Noora in a park in our way here” Adam explained

“It’s not what you think. I have an explanation” Yousef said facing Elias

“Really? Enlighten me”

Yousef thought for a moment about the best way to explain everything, he didn’t want his friend to think that he had been playing with his sister all this time, because he hadn’t, not at all.

“I met Noora to tell her that there won’t be anything between us, ever”

“And why would she think that there could be something between you in the first place?”

“Because…because we kissed a couple of weeks ago…at the karaoke place” Yousef admitted looking at the floor

It took Elias a moment to process all the information, his mind went back to that day and then to the days that had passed since then, everything was starting to make sense, especially certain girl’s behavior.

He wanted to scream at his friend, he wanted to curse him, he even wanted to punch him but he tried to calm down, he decided to give him a chance to explain everything, he wanted to forgive him.

“That’s why she’s so upset” Elias whispered more to himself than for the others to hear

“Who?” Yousef asked

“Who do you think?” Elias said, he didn’t want to say his sister’s name out loud, he didn’t want to reveal her feelings, not in front of the rest of the boys

“How could she…?”

“She saw you. I’m pretty sure she saw you”

“What? No, she couldn’t, how?”

“She didn’t leave with me, she probably just went back inside after the fight”

“I screwed up, I screwed up big time” Yousef said covering his face with his hands

“She’s been acting really weird since that day, always sad, always angry. I thought it was just about the fight but I’m not so sure anymore” Elias explained

“What’s going on?” Mutta asked “I’m lost here”

“Nothing, this is between me and Yousef” Elias said

I screwed up, I screwed up, I screwed up” Yousef kept repeating

He looked at the sky and then back at his friend but something caught his attention.

“Is that Sana’s bedroom?” he asked pointing at a window on the house

“Yes, it is” Elias said confused as to why that was important

“The window is opened. Have you talked about me and Noora here?”

“Yes…”

“Do you think she…?” Yousef left the question unfinished

Elias widened his eyes when he realized what his friend was implying.

“Let’s go”

Both of them entered the house leaving three confused boys behind. They went straight to Sana’s bedroom and tried to open the door but it was blocked, like something was against it.

“Sana? It’s me open the door” Elias said

“Leave me alone Elias” Sana said

“Sana, please, why are you blocking the door? What’s going on?” he tried again

This time she didn’t answer. She had been crying for the past half an hour. She looked at the paper on her bed, the one with Noora’s password. She was tempted to use it, to expose Sara and to hurt them all the way they had hurt her, but something was stopping her. She didn’t want to be like this. She wanted to be a better person than them.

“Sana? It’s me, Yousef. Please let me in”

She froze the instant she heard that voice. What was he doing there? Why did he want to talk to her? Was he there to tell him that he was dating her best friend? She was definitely not ready for that.

“Please, Sana…” he almost whispered.

He turned around to look at his friend with a defeated expression.

“She’s not going to open the door” he said

“You think the window is still opened?” Elias whispered

“There’s only one way to find out” Yousef said making his way out of the house.

He went back to the backyard where the boys still waited for them. He got to the window, which was in fact opened, and climbed it getting in the bedroom with a jump.

“What the…what are you doing Yousef? Who do you think you are to enter my bedroom without my permission?” Sana yelled angry

“I’m sorry okay? But you wouldn’t open the door!”

“And why do you think is that?” she asked exasperated

“We need to talk”

No, we don’t” she said wiping away the tears that had been rolling down her face.

“Please, don’t cry” he said taking a step towards her, a step she took backwards.

He nodded and looked behind him, all the boys were looking at them from the grass. He walked over to the window and closed it, this was a private conversation.

“Let me say what I have to say and then if you want me to, I’ll leave”

She avoided his eyes but nodded knowing that he wasn’t leaving anyway.

“Did you see us? At the karaoke place, did you see us?” he asked

She closed her eyes and said nothing

“I’ll take it as a yes.” He nodded “Did you hear the guys talking about me meeting her today?”

Again Sana said nothing, which he took as a confirmation.

It’s not what you think” he said

“I don’t want to know”

Just hear me out please”

Sana took a deep breath and sat on the bed preparing herself for the pain.

“I kissed Noora because I wanted to forget about you”

“What?”

“I…I thought you didn’t feel anything about me, I thought there was no hope between you and me.”

“So you kissed my best friend? Great” she said bitterly

“Sana, you ignored me for a week, you unfriended me on Facebook, then we spent this amazing afternoon together and I thought that everything was going to be okay, but then you didn’t talk to me during the whole week”

“Neither did you”

“I know…But I thought…I thought that maybe I was bothering you, that maybe me always trying to contact you was annoying to you. I thought that if you felt something about me you’d talk to me, that maybe you were just being polite and that’s all”

“I didn’t talk to you first ‘cause I was afraid that it was all a game to you” she admitted

“It wasn’t. I swear it wasn’t” he said taking a step closer. “When I got to the club that Friday and saw Even there, I thought that I was right, that you were only being nice to me so you could reunite us. It was stupid and I’m sorry. So when Noora kissed me I kissed her back thinking that I’d be able to forget you. But I couldn’t, so I stopped the kiss, told her I was sorry and left”

“You stopped the kiss?” she asked

“Yes. I didn’t know you were there, if I had known…I wish I had never kissed her.”

“I wish you hadn’t…”

“After that, you kept ignoring me and again my fears came back, I was sure that you didn’t feel anything about me, I was ready to finally give up on you but yesterday…playing with you, seeing you smile, it made me feel alive and I realized that I didn’t want to give up on you, I don’t want to give up on you”

“It was the first time I’d smiled in two weeks” she said looking at the floor “It was important to me. So that’s why it hurt me so much when I found out you were with Noora today”

“I was with her to tell her that I’m not interest in her, that nothing will happen between us, because I like someone else…I like you. And even if you hate me now, even if you never give me a chance, I can’t pretend that I can forget about you and be with someone else. I just can’t”

“We have a serious problem of communication you and me” she said shaking her head and feeling stupid for making assumptions.

“We do” he said approaching her and crouching in front of her. “But maybe now that it’s all out in the open we can get better”

“Not everything is out. There’s still one more thing that has been left unspoken”

“What is it?” he frowned

“I like you too” she said smiling

His smile matched hers after hearing those words from her mouth.

“But we can’t keep doing this, we can’t keep assuming things and not talking to each other” she said

“I agree. And I promise that I won’t act stupidly again”

“That’s a lot to promise” she laughed

“Okay, I’ll probably act stupidly, but I won’t ever hurt you again”

And I promise I won’t make assumptions and I’ll talk to you when things happen”

“Cool. It’s a deal” he said smiling

“It is”

—————————-x————————-

This is it!!

Thank you so much to everyone that sended at prompt and I really hope you’ve liked it!

Thank you all for reading♥

I never got to be her maid of honor 😢This was the last Facebook message from one of my best friends before she passed away. We thought she beat the brain cancer, but later she had a bad stroke from the Chemotherapy & that’s what took her life. She was only 23 and about to get married and start her life. I miss her so much.

“Time travel will be invented in the year 2025. How do we know? Because that is the year that this delightful lady claimed to have traveled from. In the year 1898, according the contemporary reports, Alexandria Alexis appeared ‘as if from nowhere’ and took New York society by storm. Some fawned over her while others claimed she was insane. This debate was however rendered moot when, on New Year’s Eve 1899, she simply disappeared…

As it turns out, this particular story was meant to entertain people, as It started to be cycled on the internet in 2013 as part of a advertising plan for a then upcoming “steampunk” science-fiction novel. I first ran across this particular story through Facebook, of all places; one of my friends sent me the link, knowing my predelection for the strange [link].

The original post, whose description I posted as the legend above, was put up by the Facebook user known as- The Victorian Academy of Magick’
which has proved to be full of many other stories that will likely end up here someday. Digging further, I found a forum at The Magic Cafe [link] where user Voodini explains the fact that the Victorian Academy of Magick Facebook site is an advertisment of sorts for a steampunk novel still in the making. Should be fun when released… but in the meantime, I’ll be getting emails from people who don’t realize the Facebook site has fictional content!

This was the last messages between my guy best friend and me on Facebook. After that, he barely used Facebook anymore because of how sick he was and how worse his cancer was progressing. I was there for him through it all, for about 4 years. I even took him to my senior prom. I saw him at his worst, I’ve slept over his house, the hospital, and hospice. He was a true genuine friend, a very smart boy, and he had so much to offer the world. He passed away March of 2016. I am at his house with his mom and brother right now as I’m typing this. I will always love him and always be there for his family. I miss him so terribly it makes my heart hurt just to think about him not being here with us.

Dear people who complain about the lack of Amedot content, there is a solution:

Make more Amedot content. 

That’s it. That’s all. 

Post your goofy headcanons. Write fics. Draw things. Request Amedot if you know of artists who take requests. Commission Amedot art if you can afford it. Write fics based on your fave art, or draw something from a fic you love. Do cosplay. Make gifs. Take photos of purple and green things next to each other that remind you of Amedot. Wear purple and green and take selfies. Make playlists. Make AMV’s. Post it all to tumblr in the appropriate tags. 

If you can’t do any of those things, support the people who do! Like and reblog the silly headcanons and add comments if you want. (In case it needed saying: you are always welcome to add to my silly headcanon posts, or use them as jump-off points for other content.) Leave kudos and comments on the fics you like. Like and reblog your fave Amedot art and send nice messages to your fave artists. And it doesn’t have to be some analytical masterpiece: one of my fave ao3 comments is intentionally-misspelled keyboard mashing, you guys. I took a screenshot, edited out the username and icon, and posted it to facebook to show to my non-fandom friends because I loved it so much. If someone makes something you like, tell them! They’re a lot more likely to make more!

I’m just as desperate for Amethyst and Peridot to even interact in new episodes as y’all are, okay.  

But the secret of fandom is that the the fun stuff we do in fandom, amongst ourselves, for each other, is always going to be the best part of being a fan. For real. I’ve been in fandom for, um, a long time. Don’t wait for canon to give you what you want–make it yourselves.  

Expensive Headphones AU: A Hairy Situation

“Oh my God, and he doesn’t know?” Rich couldn’t stop laughing as Michael kept pulling up more and more of Jeremy’s search history.
“I told him I’d delete it later but I couldn’t! It was too funny!”
“I can’t believe he used your laptop for this! What’s this…Furschange to the Extreme…I don’t want to know yet I do.”
“This isn’t even the worst thing I have on him.” Michael clicked on a link in his E-mail and a picture of Jeremy in a dolphin suit popped up. Rich found himself on the floor laughing.
“That…that is amazing! He,he actually sent you pictures?!”
“It was an accident, he doesn’t know I have them!”
“Well, are you still angry at Jeremy?”
“A little bit. Why?”
“Well what if these pictures were to…accidentally surface on Facebook?” Michael stopped laughing for a second before an even bigger grin plastered his face.
“Normally I wouldn’t do this to my friend but he said it himself, I’m just a loser. A loser with embarrassing photos.” Rich took the laptop, opening his Facebook and attaching the photo.
“What should we add?”
“How about, Jeremy has somefin to explain.”
“That’s perfect,” Rich typed the pun in before hitting the post button. “And like that any social life he had will be dead in a matter of hours.” He was surprised by the uncomfortable look on Michael’s face. “What’s wrong?”
“Maybe we shouldn’t. I mean I’m mad at him, but I don’t want to hurt him…”
“He’ll be fine, besides from what you told me it’s not like he cared about hurting you.”
“Yeah, you’re right…hey do you wanna play some videogames?”
“Sure what do you have?”
“There’s this little game I have called Apocalypse of the Damned.”
“That sounds awesome.”