my family is pretty cool sometimes

gone girl starters

below are random starters taken from/inspired by the novel Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn.

  • ❝Should I remove my soul before I come inside?❞
  • ❝Please don’t eat anything in that area.❞
  • ❝He is the kind of guy who carries himself like he gets laid a lot, a guy who likes women, a guy who would actually fuck me properly.❞
  • ❝I would like to be fucked properly.❞
  • ❝I sound quite slutty, don’t I?❞
  • ❝You look all twitchy.❞
  • ❝There’s no romantic present for wood.❞
  • ❝Go home, fuck her brains out, then smack her with your penis and scream, ‘There’s some wood for you, bitch.‘❞
  • ❝Seems lonely.❞
  • ❝The cat was sweet, but extremely stupid.❞
  • ❝Well you certainly take your time about it, don’t you?❞
  • ❝So how likely is it I’ll meet someone I love, much less someone I love enough to marry?❞
  • ❝'He’s doing what you tell him to do because he doesn’t care enough to argue,’ I think. 'Your petty demands simply make him feel superior, or resentful, and someday he will fuck his pretty, young coworker who asks nothing of him, and you will actually be shocked.'❞
  • ❝Let me guess: baby of the family.❞
  • ❝I am fat with love!❞
  • ❝Neither of us gets stage fright.❞
  • ❝This is how I always pictured it. This is exactly how I pictured it.❞
  • ❝I sometimes bring my coffee and the paper and just sit.❞
  • ❝You’re a planner, aren’t you? You don’t seem like the type to wing anything.❞
  • ❝We call them the 'dancing monkeys’.❞
  • ❝I am content with letting him be himself.❞
  • ❝I wanted to play it cool, but then I started crying.❞
  • ❝Please don’t lay a guilt trip on me on top of it.❞
  • ❝Not according to the prenup.❞
  • ❝I can’t even figure out if I should be angry.❞
  • ❝My dad isn’t someone I like to talk about that much.❞
  • ❝I feel like something is going wrong, very wrong, and that it will get even worse.❞
  • ❝I don’t feel like a person at all : I am something to be loaded and unloaded, like a sofa or a cuckoo clock.❞
  • ❝I don’t feel real anymore.❞
  • ❝I still say it’s the river.❞
  • ❝Picture me: I’m crazy about you.❞
  • ❝Wow your parents must really hate me.❞
  • I ❝Hope you like canned soup.❞
  • ❝If there was ever a time for assisted sleep…❞
  • ❝Just got to keep on keeping on.❞
  • ❝I’m making the best of a really bad situation.❞
  • ❝He/She seemed to have lost all interest in both me and said ailing parents.❞
  • ❝Baby, why the fuck haven’t you called me?❞
  • ❝I need to feel your hands on me, that’s all I’ve been thinking about.❞
  • ❝Come up with me. I want to be with you.❞
  • ❝You fucking idiot.❞
  • ❝Sometimes, I look at myself and I think : No wonder why people around you find you ridiculous, frivolous, and spoiled.❞
  • ❝No it’s not that, truly. I’ve never given blood. My doctor gets angry at me because I can’t even handle a yearly blood test for, like, cholesterol.❞
  • ❝How old are they?❞
  • ❝You’re a cheater!❞
  • ❝It would be funnier if our sex life were as carefree as the rhyme would suggest. But last week we did… fuck? Something more romantic than have sex but less cheesy than make love.❞
  • ❝I can’t help but wonder, what’s the catch?❞
  • ❝You were in a screaming argument about a cat box.❞
  • ❝He uses me for sex when he needs to.❞
  • ❝Quiz: Your husband, with whom you shared a wonderful sex life, has turned distant and cold – he only wants sex his way, on his time. What do you do?❞
  • ❝I’ve been indulging in toddler therapy.❞
  • ❝Well, now might be the right time. To start a family. Try to get pregnant.❞
  • ❝I m cracking under the pressure. I will snap.❞
  • ❝I didn’t realize until I was almost there that it was Valentine’s Day. It was Valentine’s day and I was going to buy a gun and then cook my spouse dinner.❞
  • ❝I just would feel safer with a gun.❞
  • ❝I don’t know what would be good luck : plus sign or minus sign.❞
  • ❝This man might kill me.❞
  • ❝Picture me : I’m a girl who is very bad. I need to be punished, and by punished, I mean HAD.❞
  • ❝I’ve told you, I’ve told you so many times!❞
  • ❝To start: I should never have been born.❞
  • ❝Is she still alive?❞
  • ❝I was the girl/boy who battled oblivion and won.❞
  • ❝I ruined my mother’s womb in the process.❞
  • ❝I’ve always been better than the rest of them. I was the one who made it.❞
  • ❝They get to be perfect without even trying, without even facing one moment of existence, while I am here on earth, and everyday I must try, and every day is a chance to be less than perfect.❞
  • ❝That’s because you loved a person who didn’t really exist.❞
  • ❝Being the Cool Girl means you are a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes, and anal sex.❞
  • ❝Men actually think that girl exists.❞
  • ❝The Cool Girls are even more pathetic. They’re not pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be.❞
  • ❝It’s tempting to be the girl every guy wants.❞
  • ❝They never taught me how to be happy.❞
  • ❝I would always try to figure out why this is fun.❞
  • ❝If you let a man cancel plans or decline to do things for you, you lose.❞
  • ❝What a cunt.❞
monster factory episodes summed up in a single line
  • skyrim: And he does have a reason to hate Mondays.
  • the sims 4: I don't know why you're looking for a mom when you could be looking for a third dad.
  • fallout 3: What even in the world do you think you're DOING, Fallout?!
  • wwe 2k14: Welcome to the ring, America’s burden. Our grim legacy. God’s favorite mistake.
  • mass effect 2: It's a gachapon, only it's a guy's face.
  • ark survival evolved: Take a T. rex bite out of crime!
  • second life: Second Life, you shouldn't let me do this! Ethically!
  • bloodborne: Whoa, hey, some of these aren't colours...
  • oblivion: setactorfullname "A Dead Person"
  • fallout 4: I do a lot of bad shit today.
  • black desert online: The thing is... he looks just like Bart.
  • dragon's dogma: Swear fealty to me and I will only throw you a little. Just kidding.
  • blade & soul: I don't know why you are self-sabotaging like this right now.
  • dark souls: I don't know, man, you'd have to take it up with the Arby's witch.
  • wwe 2k16: Yeah, that's what I look like.
  • dark souls 3: That man is gonna be mad at me forever.
  • second life, second chances: What's up everyone, I think dogs should vote!
  • soul caliber 5: But how underrepresented are furries in fighting games?
  • tiger woods 08: Did not golf. Failed to golf.
  • saints row the 3rd: I'm gonna Dairy Queen these guys out of the fucking sky!
  • spore: Hey, someone come fuck this!
  • wii sports resort: Dick Cheney, your reign ends here!
  • champions online: This is the fucking dude of the century. I can't even process everything that's going on here.
  • conan exiles: You gained a level of comfort with your own body!
  • dragon age inquisition: We've easily tripled the amount of grease we're getting off this grandma.
  • monster mania: Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with God.
  • sweeps week: Was it worth it, Todd? What you did to my family for ratings?
  • super mario bros maker: Oh, no, I don't like having this power over this brother!
  • final fantasy 15: Look at this cool shit. That's pretty fucking cool though.
Paris | Getting To Know You Series Part One

Word Count: 1,035

Request: @champagne-for-the-painn Hey, can you please do an imagine where the reader and shawn are still at the begining of the relationship and they are just hanging out and getting to know each other, and can it be cute and fluffy cause i’m having serious Shawn feelings rn pls

A/N: special shout out to my homie @sowhatshawn for coming up with this concept u rock fam. this is inspired by the TNHMB video and I’m gonna make it a little series bc this part ended up being way longer than I expected. hope you enjoy :) 

The clicking of your heels echoed through the streets as you ran. You didn’t know how long you were running for, but you knew it would be a long walk back to the hotel. You covered your mouth in attempt to hide your giggles, each one becoming louder with each stumble over your own feet you took. You couldn’t even feel the chilly wind cutting through your spine- the feeling was covered up by Shawn’s warm hand in yours, making your entire body heat up. His body was still hot with a thin layer of sweat showing, a reminder that he had just gotten off stage less than an hour ago. 

The adrenaline pumped through your veins, making each step more energetic. You didn’t know where he was taking you. You didn’t care. The excitement of being in a new relationship and in a new place took over all your emotions. 

He quickly ran up a set of steps, taking two at a time making it impossible for you to keep up. When he reached the top of the steps, he turned around to take both of your hands, pulling you with him.

“We are almost there,” he told you as he turned back around, pulling you along with him with force. You two ran for just a few more minutes before he abruptly stopped, making you crash into his back with another giggle. He turned around and caught your stumbling body, wrapping his arms around your waist.

You two just stood for a couple moments, catching your breath between giggles. It wasn’t until Shawn spun you around that you noticed the setting around you. The sky was a deep black, making the stars clearly visible. The Eiffle Tower’s lights gleamed bright in front of you, lighting up the entire city. Not a sound could be heard. Just your pants as you continued to try and catch your breath.

You felt Shawn’s body press against your back, placing his hands on the fence in front of you on both sides of your body. You were captured in his embrace, protecting you from the night winds that continued to get colder with every minute.

Not a word was spoken. You took in the scene in front of you. The lights, the sky, the arrangements of buildings in front of you. After a few moments, you felt Shawn kiss the back of your head, bringing you back to reality.

“How did you know to find this place?” You asked quietly, afraid of disrupting the silence that hung over you. He placed his head on your shoulder. 

“I like to explore in my free time,” he answered, his voice just as quiet as yours, making sure the conversation was only between you and him. 

“This reminds me of when I was young. The house I grew up in had a great view of the city with a balcony. Sometimes at night, when the sky was especially pretty and it was a little bit cool out, me and my family would sit out on the balcony as just look at the city. My dad would sometimes swing me around and we would dance. I miss it,” you said, almost forgetting you were talking to someone. You felt Shawn kiss your shoulder and spin you around.

“Like this?” He asked as he grabbed your hand in his, raising it up to the height of your shoulder. His other hand found your hip moving you closer to his body and away from the fence. He spun you around gently, accidentally stumbling a little on the way. You laughed at his attempt of elegance as you stepped on his feet lightly, bringing you slightly closer to him. He moved his feet slowly in a pattern, swaying you back and forth. Every few seconds he would stumble, making laughs escape both of your mouths. 

“Yeah, exactly like that,” you said between laughs as you stepped off his feet and sitting down on the concrete. 

“I think I did pretty good. I’m not the most graceful person,” he complimented himself and sat down next to you. 

“So, tell me something about you now,” you requested as you lowered your head onto his shoulder. 

“Like what?” he asked. His arm moved to scoop you closer to his body, once again shielding you from the cold wind.

“Anything. Childhood. Family. Friends. Pets. Anything. I told you something about me, so now it’s your turn,” you said, your head lifting to face him.

“Hmm… When I was about nine I attempted to shave. I didn’t do it right and that’s how I ended up with this scar,” he told you as he pointed to a small indent on his left cheek. You laughed at the story resulting in him forming a fake offended face.

“Don’t laugh! I was nine. And you think it’s cute,” he defended himself as you quieted your laughing. You placed on hand on his cheek, right next to the small scar, and planted a kiss on the mark. 

“Of course I do. I think everything about you is cute,” you stated, rubbing your thumb along the edge of his cheek. The pout on his face disappeared, slowly forming a smile, which you reciprocated. He leaned down slowly, placing his lips on yours, the smile still lingering on his lips. The kiss lasted only for a second, ending when you pulled away unexpectedly from a thought popping into your head. 

“I have an idea!” you exclaimed, leaving Shawn still leaned in with a face of disappointment.

“Is it so important you had to ruin our moment?” He asked with fake annoyance. You nodded your head vigorously, ignoring his tone.

“So, I think every time we go somewhere new, we should share something new with each other. Like we shared something new with each other here. We should make it like a tradition,” you said with excitement. Shawn contemplated the idea for a second before nodding his head in agreement. 

“I think that would be a great way to get to know you better,” he said with a smile, pulling you in for another sweet kiss, leaving you excited for all the new things to come.

slimemoldsubways  asked:

Been following you a while for the reptile content, but not enough to know what your deal is-- who are you? What's your education background? What do you do for a living?

My name’s Caitlin! I graduated from Notre Dame in 2012 with a BA in anthropology. I went to boarding school as a teenager, and that actually has a ton of influence on how my postgrad education’s turned out because the professors there were friggin’ amazing. I got my masters in anthropology in 2015 and am working on my PhD. I don’t ever actually say the name of the university I’m at now in posts, but it’s pretty easy to figure out, tbh. It’s a state school that I actually like a lot better than I did Notre Dame- we might be broke, but there’s just something about us that I really dig. I also do research at the Field Museum of Natural History- my diss subject is state-enforced maize consumption and the immediate effects on health at the Wari periphery during the Middle Horizon and Late Intermediate Period (CE 400-1400, give or take). I use teeth as my primary avenue of investigation, which is kind of the Family Trait- my dad’s an oral surgeon, my brother’s going to be an oral surgeon, there’s dentists going back in the family tree for years, etc.- but I’m the only one who studies them academically. My research population is a collection that’s been with the Field since before it was incorporated as a museum- the Ancoñeros I work with have been in Chicago since 1893, which I think is hella cool. I have no idea when I’m gonna finish- probably sometime in the next couple of years. For some reason, the university pays me to teach ANTH 105, which slays me because I’m getting paid to do this thing that I love. I’m not actually a herpetologist! I thought about it pretty seriously for a while, even did some job shadowing at the Louisville Zoo, but in the end, anthropology was really where things clicked for me. 

So yeah! That’s me in a nutshell!

Vegan & Gluten-Free Kids.

My kids and I currently follow a vegan diet 100% of the time and a gluten-free diet 99% of the time.

*My kids are not technically vegan because I don’t have any control over what they eat at their dads but when they are with me they eat my way.

People ask me all the time how I get them to eat vegan food.

The answer to that is that I make familiar food just veganized.

They don't miss anything when they are with me because they get everything just without animal products and gluten.  

My kids are pretty young, and Serena is in that 3-year-old picky phase, but for most meals, they eat their food like it’s nothing different. 

So I was thinking I would start posting recipes for the foods that I cook for us.

I thought it would be cool and would help anyone who was thinking about switching their family to a more plant-based diet..

I have so many meals I want to share and I’m going to be doing a mix of text posts and videos. 

So if your interested like this post so I know. 

I’m planning on posting my first recipe sometime next weekend. (assuming everything goes as planned. lol) 

Roadhouse Blues

Hey y’all! :)

I’ve been wanting to write this for a while, but kept getting distracted by other stuff (aka rewatching Supernatural). Well, I finally sat my ass down and wrote this in a burst of productivity, so here you go!

I do not own the song lyrics in this story (I don’t think I was even born when it came out), so don’t sue me. 

Warnings- minor swearing, mentions of blood and guts

Word Count- 1,734

Y/N- Your Name

Y/M/N- Your Middle Name

Y/L/N- Your Last Name

Y/F/C- Your Favorite Color

Y/N/N- Your Nickname

Originally posted by janaenaenae

Sometimes you hated being a hunter. Yeah, sometimes it was pretty cool- like that time you saved a family from a spirit that had been haunting generation after generation, or the time you rescued a kid from a thirsty vampire. It had its highlights, but sometimes it just plain sucked. Like today, for example. You had just finished a particularly brutal hunt that left you resembling Carrie at the prom. There was blood all over your favorite shirt, your boots, and you were pretty sure that you had some chunks of intestine in your hair. Attractive, right?

You had gotten in your car, which would definitely need a deep cleaning in the near future, and drove to the Roadhouse- it was pretty much the only place on Earth where you could walk in covered in blood and get a few high-fives. Not to mention a free hot shower and an actual bed- after sleeping in your car for weeks on end, a bed was basically the best thing ever.

You pulled into the lot about an hour later and got out of the car, grabbing your backpack and duffle bag from the backseat before locking the doors behind you. You opened the door and stumbled into the bar, and everyone turned to look at you. You waved at everyone and made your way to the bar, greeting a few people you recognized before dropping your bags at your feet. You were about to sit on the bar stool when you heard a voice behind you, and you quickly changed your mind.

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So today is my birthday (yeah finally 19 yrs. old…kidding, I feel like if I don’t begin with t very soon I’m going nuts.) and I’m not a birthday person tbh I just wanna oversleep this day but yeah I just wanted to make a short résumé of how far I’ve come this last year and I gotta say my life changed a lot. I’m feeling better than ever, my classmates are all pretty cool and call me by my right name and pronouns and my family also make a lot of effort. Even though I sometimes have bad days I must say that I’m a lot happier with being openly trans. A few of my friends still don’t know this fact about me but I plan on telling them if I see them the next time (I’m not even quite sure if I can call them friends). So all in all I’m quite happy even though it would be nice if I would lose this blobs on my chest very soon (yeah I’m an impatient person but dysphoria is hitting me hard sometimes). I hope everyone is doing fine and if you need someone to talk to you can always write me a message, we are in this togehter! :]

A Magical Christmas; Peter Parker x reader

Okay this was my first Peter Parker oneshot that I had thought back several months ago and yeah it’s another Christmas theme. Now this is Tom Holland’s spiderman and I’m sorry if you’d wanted this to be Garfield’s or Maguire’s spiderman. Anyways this is now a romantic oneshot so now child comforts for now except mentioned because well………….spoilers! I’ll just let you read on okay :) Again I do not OWN the Marvel characters, they belong to their respected owners and any other references belong to their respected owners/companies. Enjoy :)

Originally posted by v-writings


“But I thought you said you’d be able to take a day off” I said through the phone.

‘I know but you know my new job’. I chuckled softly then continued solemnly.

“I just can’t believe I’ll be spending Christmas without you”.

‘I know sweetie, I hate it to, if I could I would reverse time and make Wong give me the day off’.

“I know you would, but he’d probably bust you even more and force you to work for all holidays”.

‘Probably. I’ve got to go now sweetheart. I love you, you know that right sweetheart?’

“I do god-papa. Bye”

Bye’. I hung up the phone and leaned up against my locker sighing sadly.  I can’t believe that my Godfather has to work on Christmas keeping the world safe. Christmas should be a time celebrating with family and friends, considering that God-papa Stephen is all I have of a family.

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Ivy’s Ref (EndSnake Child)

  • Yep I said she was next.And Here she is.
  • Second Fanchild that doesn’t have much Items.
  • I couldn’t give her a Horrible problem thank Twix for that.You could say he didn’t let me Torture his little Sis.
  • But he couldn’t save her Personality sadly.
  • Expect long things like this from me when it comes to Ocs/Fanchilds.

Her Ref:

Attack: 60 Def: ??? Lv: 0

She’s Still blind.


Name: Ivy

Nickname: n/a.

Age: ????

Birthday: September 28.

Height: 4'8

Chaotic Neutral

Status: Single

Special Ability: She can use Lu as a Weapon.The Snake will become Huge and Ivy uses her Mind and Hand movements to control the Snake.But If Lu gets Hurt in this Form Ivy will Suffer also.

Hobbies: Sitting near her Window on her Room,Singing when noone is around.

Favorite food: Anything with Vanilla,She Likes drinking Hot Choco.

Likes: Empty Places,Being alone,Beautiful Places.

Dislikes: ????


  • She prefer to hangout with Twix and His Girlfriend(Lavender)
  • She meets up with a Friend each Firday
  • Her Right eye is Turning Red to Violet,Her Hair is Growing as Time passes by.
  • Ivy locks herself in her room whenever she’s home.


This should Explain it:

Imma Run away from Twix now .

Ivy still has a large chance of tripping down and Smacking on the wall.

She also have a Hobbit of walking out when she knows she can’t reply or answer.It takes two times to call her when she’s in a Deep though.




She loves hanging out with Twix and Lavender and she prefer to be around them when she’s not at home.





Ivy doesn’t like to give Ender Problems so she doesn’t tell Ender about what’s her situation.And She Acts Normal Around him.She still Smiles reguardless of what she feels when she’s around Ender.


Ivy Adores him even if she doesn’t talk to him often.She knows he has reasons on his Actions.And She knows its for the Sake of the Family.(:v she’s still young)

Other people:


Her And Crimson are Very Close friends and They Hangout on Fridays.(Sometimes they don’t).


Ivy thinks she’s cool and pretty much love her Reaction when She teases her Brother.Again She Prefers to hangout with Twix and Lavender alot.

[Be noted that I only include Siblings and people that Interact with her.I might put new things in the Future]

I used to be a runner...

I feel like I’ve lost a lot of my running roots over the past few years. A move from a city I loved (Conway) to a city I tolerated (Hot Springs) was the first know. I had a great group I ran with most mornings, and they really pushed me to be better. A job change in January 2012 coupled with some life difficulties firmly knocked me off the wagon.

In Hot Springs, we took to the trails and found solace. Rachel in particular found her home in the woods. I’ve always liked it, but missed the pure running. In Hot Springs, there wasn’t a morning group to run with, we couldn’t run near our house, and the city didn’t have great running roots. I tried to make lemonade out of it… I did. But I struggled with my running and it wasn’t the same. Mother’s Day 2012, I ran a great half marathon in 1:30, but that was the beginning of the drop off. Since then, I’ve slowed more and more. Some pain in my right knee hasn’t helped either.

It wasn’t all bad. We started the LOViT 100 in 2013, and have really enjoyed highlighting the trails we loved. I ran the Thunder Rock 100 in May 2015, and had my most positive 100 mile experience to date. Rachel broke 24 hours for 100 in there sometime too. Also, we started backpacking with the kids, throwing in some adventures in some really cool places in the Ouachita Mountains.

A job change and a move to Charleston in August 2015 was a big change for the family. While it is an overall improvement, it hasn’t been the easiest transition. However, I think we’re happier here than we were in Hot Springs. We love our house and neighborhood, our church, and our friends. In my work, I took a new job based here, and then have gone through two promotions. I get to lead a pretty big team now, and really enjoy the work we do. The kids are growing and changing, and it’s a new adventure every day. Rachel has come out of her shell here, and really likes it.

Running-wise, I haven’t quite caught up. Charleston has some great running routes. It’s pretty nice to run in my neighborhood too. But, I haven’t taken full advantage of it. My normal 50+ mile weeks are now 10 to 20 mile weeks. I’m a lot slower too.

I’m ready to change this. While Rachel is gone, I should use this opportunity to get into better shape. I need to push myself more. I’m still capable of running fast… I just need to find it again.

I will. Let’s go!

since i hit 1.4k and i’ll be 17 tomorrow i decided to do a mini follow forever! this is basically just a mutuals appreciation thing, because my mutuals are the ones who have made such a lasting impact on my life. thanks for being my friends and most importantly my family. i don’t like to talk about Feelings™ most of the time but i genuinely don’t have a proper support system in my life so it’s pretty cool to have a bunch of strangers validating my terrible life choices *finger guns* y’all are pretty rad.

@xsmallpidge @i-sometimes-say-stupid-things @gunnley @hotchickswithsuperpowers @willozsummers @kathubs @19thsentry @rahnesinclair @jenny-calendar @sanverspotsticker @emofaith @sunnydaleslut @spikexsummers @sunflowjr @planetjpg @theaterkidlester @ladyluckless @princessofsunnydale @bisexualcordelia @wlwbuffy @troyeboyish @catsgrant @catty-words @hydratedhowell @ohsupergirls @fcrbiddenfcrest @mearcats @faithandbuffy@anyasbunny@emoreggiemantle@whedoncon

Mr. Fairy Floss

Fandom: GG/Youtube

Chapter: 1/1

Word Count: 6,227

Pairings: Rubberbang, background Egoflap

Rating: T

Warnings: Lots of typical teenage-boy cursing, Dan being a dork

Summary: While stuck together at the top of a Ferris wheel, Ross and Dan become acquainted with each other for the first time.

Read it on AO3 here!

[A/N: Based off the prompt: ‘I was third wheeling with my best friend and his/her bf/gf at the amusement park when I got stuck sitting on a two seated roller coaster with some stranger and something happened so now we are stuck almost at the top and I hate heights but at least they are really hot’ au

The rest of my A/N is in the AO3 link ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ]

“Hey, Ross! Roooosssssss.

Suzy’s bouncy, gentle voice easily pries him awake. The next time Ross blinks his eyes open, she and Arin are both standing in front of him, Arin with his eyebrows knit in concern, and Suzy bearing an expression devoid of nothing but worry. It takes a moment for him to sleepily comprehend their surroundings and remember where he is, but the abundant noise of screaming, gleeful children around them and the sight of the giant, overbearing rollercoaster poised in the distance behind his friends is just enough to jog his memory.

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Nebula: The Courtney chronical

A/N: The Year: 2004. The Place: Brisbane, Australia. Baby Courtney is 11 years old. And she has her first crush. And it is not going well…

(Special thanks to @samrull for providing the inspiration for Courtney’s obsessive desires.)

Written by @veronicasanders ❤️


Loving someone from afar was hard work. Ever since Isabelle’s family had moved in the summer before, Courtney had been praying, wishing, hoping against all hope that the older girl would notice her. Would talk to her. Would look in her direction for more than a passing, dismissive glance.

Courtney loved everything about her. From the red streaks in her platinum blonde hair, to her wide hazel eyes, to her sarcastic laugh, to the dimples that appeared in her cheeks when she flashed her crooked smile. She loved how Isabelle didn’t give a fuck what the “popular” kids did, but instead had her own style, her own interests, her own laissez-faire attitude. She kept a leather-bound journal and used to scribble in it angrily, glaring at people when they pissed her off. She told one particularly dickheaded boy in their neighborhood that she was a witch, after she saw him push his sister down a hill. Helping the girl up, she stared at him with daggers in her eyes, swearing to curse him for all eternity unless he apologized.

She was everything.

Of course, a girl like that - the epitome of cool, the queen of counter-culture - that girl had no use for Courtney. Who never spoke up, who never made trouble. Never stood out in any way. Courtney was everything Isabelle was not. Ordinary. Vanilla. Boring.

And then, one day, at the start of Summer holiday, a miracle happened. A bone-fide Christmas miracle. Courtney’s parents decided to take her brother to Sydney to look at colleges (as if Ben was going to college. Courtney’s parents meant well, but they were a little slow on the uptake sometimes), and voila! Suddenly she was staying with Isabelle’s family. Sleeping on a twin bed in her room. For five. Whole. Days.


“I hate ALL my clothes!” Isabelle moaned, tossing yet another outfit dramatically to the ground. “I have literally NOTHING to WEAR! This fuckin’ SUCKS!”

Courtney bit her lip. She wanted to offer a solution, but wasn’t 100% sure how a drag closet would be received. “Um…we could go to my house. Ben has some pretty cool shit.”

“Boy clothes?” Isabelle looked skeptical.

“Well…not exactly.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s sort of hard to explain.”

Isabelle narrowed her eyes and sighed, exasperated. “Alright, Miss Mysterious. Let’s go.”

Butterflies filled Courtney’s stomach as they walked outside, through the garden, across the narrow creek, up the hill to Courtney’s house. Courtney led her up the steps to Ben’s room, where giant, dramatic black letters warned them to “KEEP OUT OR SUFFER THE DIRE CONSEQUENCES!!!!!!!!” She pushed open the door, feeling more nervous about Isabelle in her house then invading her brother’s sacred personal space.

She slid open the mirrored closet door, revealing the two-third’s of the closet where Ben kept all of his drag stuff. Sequins and feathers and lace…fringe and sparkles and pleather and fishnets. Rows of heels on the floor below the clothes, and stacks of wigs and boxes of jewelry on the shelves above, along with his extensive makeup collection.

Isabelle’s eyes practically bugged out of her head. “This is your BROTHER’S stuff?”


“So…your brother is gay?”


Isabelle considered this for a moment, and then nodded approvingly. “That’s cool as.”

Courtney felt a sense of relief wash over her, pride replacing her edgy nerves. “He does my makeup and stuff all the time.”

“Really?! You’re sooo lucky. All my brother cares about is surfing and his dumb motorbike.”

Courtney gestured grandly to the closet. “Well…you can try some of his stuff on if you want.”

Soon enough, they’d both concocted entirely new ensembles. Isabelle in a shiny copper halter top and houndstooth shorts, and Courtney in the more ridiculous outfit that Isabelle had insisted on: a padded, sequined bra and pleather mini-skirt with a fringed bolero jacket. After Isabelle used Ben’s prized palette to add some color to Courtney’s face, all that was left was loading themselves up with every piece of jewelry Ben owned, before collapsing, giggling, onto his bed.

Isabelle gazed around the room at all the pictures on Ben’s walls. She smiled appreciatively at his Moulin Rouge poster, and then her eyes lit up at the shrine to Robbie Williams over his desk.

“Your brother has good taste. I’d give anything to pash Ewan. Or Robbie.”

Courtney nodded in agreement, though she wasn’t sure she saw the allure, exactly. Although she had to admit that Ewan was at least relatively cute, compared to most boys she knew.

“You ever pashed anyone, Courtney?” Isabelle had a slightly teasing lilt to her voice. As if she already knew the answer.

Courtney bristled a little. She was determined not be seen as a baby. “Yes,” she lied.

Isabelle raised an eyebrow. “Really? Who?”

Thinking quickly, Courtney answered, “Greg.” The tall, soft-spoken boy on her cheer team was always nice to Courtney, and he was clean and didn’t smell nearly as bad as most of the other boys in her class. If she was gonna have to pash any boy, it may as well have been him.

Isabelle burst out laughing. “You sure love the homos, Court. Greg is gay as mardi gras.”

Courtney felt her cheeks heat up. She cleared her throat, racking her brain to try and divert the attention away from herself. “Have…have you pashed anyone?”

“Nope!” Isabelle said. “I want my first time to be magical. Like in the movies. My friends think I’m weird but I don’t care.”

“I…I don’t think that’s weird.” Courtney suddenly wished she hadn’t lied. “I think it’s cool.”

“Yeah, well. I’m not just leaving it up to fate, though. I practice a lot.”

“How do you practice?”

“Like…you know…on your hand, or a pillow, or…you know, with your friends.”

“Your friends?”

Isabelle flashed a crooked smile, revealing those dimples that Courtney wanted to reach out and touch. It took all her strength to keep her hands to herself. “You know…like…girls don’t count. That’s just like, so you can get good at it for when it’s time to kiss a boy. Like, for real.”

Courtney’s palms began to get sweaty, and her mouth was dry as chalk. She swallowed.

“Of course, you don’t need practice, since you’re already an expert. You and Greeeeg.” Isabelle winked and Courtney thought she might die of embarrassment.

“I…may have lied about that,” she whispered.

“No shit,” Isabelle replied, hazel eyes glittering with delight.

Courtney focused away from her eyes, on her shoulders, tanned a deep caramel from the summer sun, such an enticing color that Courtney had a desire to lick her. She heard rustling and felt Isabelle moving closer to her on the bed. She looked up, saw her plush, round, plum-colored lips. She wondered if they would taste like the watermelon candy they’d eaten earlier.

“Do you want me to show you?” Isabelle asked, one finger just barely touching her chin.

Courtney prayed that she didn’t appear overly enthusiastic when she nodded, closing her eyes. And then Isabelle’s soft, moist lips were on hers, and her fingertips itched, tentatively reaching out to graze her bare midriff, circling her waist, just as Isabelle lifted her head.

“Okay, now, remember, I’m the boy,” Isabelle reminded her, rolling Courtney onto her back. “So you need to follow my lead. This time, you gotta open your mouth.”

Courtney nodded, glassy-eyed. At that point she would’ve followed her off a cliff. Her lips parted eagerly and Isabelle slipped her tongue inside, shifting the weight of her body so that she was pressing Courtney down into the mattress.

Hands cupping Courtney’s face, Isabelle murmured soft instructions to her. “Rub your tongue against mine…suck on my bottom lip…squeeze my butt…” Courtney tried to hear and follow as she floated through the clouds, ecstatic and breathless by the sheer proximity of their bodies, bare skin of their bellies pressed together, the scent of her strawberry shampoo.

Skin flushed and burning, Courtney arched her body up, rolling her hips, lifting her knees, rubbing against the older girl, in a state of utter lust, until she was slammed back into reality by the sound of laughter, Isabelle rolling away. “Damn, Courtney. You’re a little nympho, aren’t you?”

Courtney raised herself onto her elbows, panting, hair falling into her eyes. She tried to catch her breath, watching Isabelle straighten her top and fix her lipstick, at a loss for words.

“It’s cool if I borrow these clothes, right? I’m meeting Megan and Zoe at the mall.”

“Y-yeah. It’s cool.”

“Great. See you later!”


By dinnertime, Courtney was still too embarrassed to join the family. She told Mrs. Peterson that she had a stomachache. Did Isabelle think she was…what did Isabelle think?

It turned out that her fears were for naught. Isabelle didn’t seem to think anything at all about her. She spent the next few days out with her friends, mostly, and when Courtney’s mom came to pick her up that Saturday, she merely gave her a casual wave and a “see you around,” barely looking up from the fashion magazine in her lap.

They didn’t see each other much over the next school year, either, since Isabelle was in the High School and Courtney was still in Primary. It was probably for the best when her family moved again the following summer. After seeing her boyfriend dropping her off a few times, Courtney knew that there would be no more “practicing” required, and she couldn’t bear those knowing smirks Isabelle would toss her way on the rare occasion she actually acknowledged her existence. Like she KNEW something.

She didn’t know anything.

With Isabelle gone, it was much easier for Courtney to paint on a smile and be the perfect daughter, the perfect student, the little angel that everyone wanted her to be. And over the next few years, the sharp pain Courtney felt every time she thought about the older girl faded into a dull ache, a small, insignificant scar on her psyche that she barely remembered, a part of who she was without ever thinking about it.

Although occasionally, the kissing lessons did come in handy.

So my little foster sister accidentally came into the bathroom as I got out of the bath. Naturally I was horrified (not because she’d see me naked but because of my psoriasis covering my whole body) and I tried to cover up asap. To my surprise she laughed and said “you look like a leopard and that’s so cool!!” This made me smile already, but then she asked me if it hurt to which I responded that it does hurt sometimes. She immediately began searching for something and came back with my ointment to treat it, and asked me to teach her how to apply it because she wanted to “make me feel all better and pretty again”

So here I am, on the bathroom floor, my 6 year old foster sister applying the ointment to my back where I can’t reach. I feel like I might cry

anonymous asked:

Sarge (and Red to a point) remind me of granddad on my dad's side of the family. You see he was a motor pool mechanic in the Army sometime between the Korean and Vietnam Wars. After leaving the Army he became a firefighter, and then the owner of a car dealership (which he had to unfortunately sell off before I was born). Sadly he passed away back in 2007, two months after sustaining injuries in a freak highway pileup.

This is super cool, thanks for sharing!

I think this goes to prove how important/cool it is to have relatable characters. Someone that seems pretty normal could actually mean something really deep to a viewer, and that can make all the difference.

anonymous asked:

Moving next to Dylan, please? <3 I love all your imagines!

Thank you! <3

You pull up to the house with your family and look out the window with hope. When your mom had told you she got a new job in Colorado, you started packing your things almost immediately. You’d never really felt accepted in your old town, so you’re hoping for a fresh start. The moving truck pulls up behind your car and you all get out, starting to unload things. You go upstairs and quickly claim your room, falling back on your bed. After a couple minutes, you get up and look out the window. The movers are carrying your couch inside and your mom and dad are talking to a man and woman on the front lawn. Your mom says something and they all look towards the house, nodding. The woman turns and calls towards the house next door. You watch as a tall, handsome boy walks out and makes his way over to them. You move away from the window and head outside again.

“Oh, there she is,” your mom says, “Y/n, this is Mr. and Mrs. Klebold, and that’s Dylan. They’re our new neighbors.” “Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” you smile. “You too,” Mrs. Klebold smiles, “Your parents were saying you’re starting at Columbine next week. Dylan goes there.” You look at Dylan and the two of you smile faintly at each other. “Do you need help unpacking?” Mr. Klebold asks. “Oh, we couldn’t ask you to do that-” your mom starts. “Don’t be silly, we’ve love to help,” Mrs. Klebold says reassuringly. Your parents thank them and you all start carrying boxes inside.

You walk outside and see Dylan holding a box that says y/n’s CDs. “Um, where did you want these?” he asks. He follows you up to your room and puts the box on your bed. You open it and look through it, making sure nothing is broken. Dylan smiles faintly as he watches, “You have a really good taste in music.” You look at him, “Oh, thanks.” He nods, “Yeah. I have a pretty cool system in my room… if um, if you wanted to bring some of these over sometime.” You smile and nod, “Yeah, that sounds good.” Dylan nods and the two of you walk outside again, unpacking until his family invites yours over for dinner.

part 2

anonymous asked:

What if we all entered the cars universe and we became the type of car that we own? Like I would be pretty lame and normal because my car is a white 2001 Mazda 626 that I have coated in stickers on the rear bumper (so maybe that would be like a bunch of tatoos?). But then my grandma would be a freaking 2016 Corvette and my mom would be a 2015 Jeep Wrangler, so I guess things would be pretty cool.

My mom would be an ‘84 Subaru Legacy and my sisters would be ‘92 and ‘96 Subaru Legacies, and I’d be a 2006 Subaru Legacy (named Lightning, ehehe), so I’d come from a family of Legacies! Nay, a LEGACY of Legacies!! Hatchback cargo space, AWD–can’t complain.

And my dad would be a Prius, lol. And sometimes a Honda Pilot SUV with a Pirates of the Caribbean tattoo.

What about everyone else???? What would you be?

“One of my close friends lived next to a house that was always vacant. It would sell, people would move in, and then one day they’d be gone and the house would be up for sale again. One summer, when the house was listed again and the last family had moved out, we decided to go take a tour and eat some Jack in the Box we had picked up. We weren’t very smart sometimes and thought it would be cool to play chicken with whatever was haunting this house. 

My friend was really skinny and crawled through the dog door that led straight into the kitchen, then opened the back door for me. We went through all of the rooms and it was pretty nondescript, just a typical 50s style bungalow house with a similar layout to his home, lots of pretty woodwork and built-ins. After we determined that the house really wasn’t that creepy after all, we sat down in the dining area, on the floor, across from a little horseshoe shaped nook with a kitchen table and built-in bench. 

It was dusk out but the windows didn’t have curtains and it never got that dark in our city, anyway. At this point, we had been in the house for maybe 25 minutes and after we finished eating we stayed sitting just to hang out and talk since we weren’t spooked out at all. All of a sudden, mid-sentence, completely out of nowhere, my vision went black and I felt this eerie coldness wash all over me (I’m getting chills thinking about it), a feeling so thick I felt like it penetrated my through my body down to my bones. At the very same moment this happened, my friend screamed. 

I virtually could not see anything and was groping around trying to find something to grab onto and I felt so unsettled and ..cold. There’s really no other word for it. After what felt like hours, I felt my friend’s hands in mine and he pulled me to my feet and drug me through the house to the back door. He kept pulling on my arm and I still couldn’t see anything. 

We got outside and slowly… you know that feeling when you get a whole body shiver and it runs down your spine? As soon as I was outside, that’s what I felt, except this was a whole body shiver that started at the tip of my toes and went all the way up to my scalp, and unexpectedly and suddenly I could see again. My friend was as pale as a sheet and looked absolutely terrified. I felt off and sort of, gross, I guess is the best word, and in shock. 

I told him that I couldn’t see at all until I was outside, that it felt like I had been enveloped in blackness. He was just staring at me and I finally asked him why he had screamed. He hugged me and told me that he pulled me out of the house as soon as I started reaching around like I was blind because a little girl who was completely black, and yet see through, crawled out from under the table we were across from and sat on top of me.”

By: aigret  (What is the scariest thing that has ever happened to you, paranormal or otherwise?)