my experiences with men

anonymous asked:

In your opinion what is the main thing women want from men?

In my experience women, even strong confident women, want a man who makes them feel safe and secure. A man who can take her in his arms when things are difficult and say “everything will be alright”. Strength. That is what women want.

anonymous asked:

Virgos are such fuckboys! They are the worst at making up their minds.

Don’t get me started on my experiences with Virgo men.
Virgo women are queens though

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top 7 things i wish i’d heard as a young man/i think are important to hear in general
  • you won’t ever figure it out perfectly, so don’t let that hold you back. don’t even bother trying. why are you trying to decide if you’re a man or not before taking testosterone? there’s no reason. you can still take hormones if you’re “just” genderqueer, you can take them if you’re a woman for that matter. you can take them no matter what, so and if you’re sitting around dissecting every aspect of yourself to see if you ‘deserve’ them you’ll waste ages on a pointless question.
  • that being said, you’ll transition when it’s right for you. not that that’s ever an end-goal process, but i mean, the main showy part (if there’s going to be a main showy part for your particular journey). sometimes it just seems fortuitous, sometimes you wait for a reason. Lord knows, I almost tried to wait for my parents to both pass on (decided that was a bit morbid in the end). If I’d had kids I would’ve waited forever, most likely. It happens when in happens even if you do it at one of the most absurdly stressful times in your life (transitioning during your last year of nursing school not recommended)
  • you don’t particularly need same-gender friends. this is absurd. does it even make sense? what is same gender, do two people ever have the same gender? i guess maybe. i have a few male friends but what, am i going to get into another (more “male-dominated”) hobby? am i going to change to another (more “male-dominated”) career? your job and your hobbies are generally how you make friends, and tbf it’s just silly to go shopping for people when you’re already so introverted you can barely talk to the 5 (not-male) people you do talk to 
  • don’t even bother buying a commercial packer. or do. it was hilarious to own one, just having a dick in a ziploc bag in your closet. note to self: the smallest commercial packer will look, proportionally speaking, like you’ve shoved an armadillo in your tiny-man pants. you will never wind up feeling comfortable with something stuffed in your pants (unless you’re actually having sex) and you’ll never shake the idea of it being false advertising. Perhaps no one notices, or maybe they do. You know how many dudes have small dicks and no bulges? I check out a lot of dudes. i know. lots of people are pretty ungifted there. note: If you’re cosplaying in tight booty shorts for whatever reason, generally speaking, rolling up a handkerchief will suffice for a proportionally-appropriate bulge.
  • bind as much as you want. bind however you want to. dear past self: it’ll be a few years before people come out with helpful hints, and by the time they do half the time it’ll come across as a bit condescending. here’s the facts: you might have a job where you work for 16 hrs. you’re not going to go to the bathroom mid-shift and come out with tits. fuck it. it’s your body. like with everything else–eating, drinking, smoking, whatever–know the risks, and do what makes you safest. sometimes you fuck up your body to save it. and if that’s your journey, that’s fine, too. 
  • you don’t need to stand to pee. this is so dumb as a concept, nothing against those who do it. but dear self: you’ll always feel more self-conscious trying to use a stp than just going in a stall and pretending you’re taking a dump. anyway, you’re just be more apt to break a hip when you’re 95 if you pick up the habit. fuck it, sit and pee if you like. (are the seats grosser? not really. or maybe they are. it’s been like 6 years, maybe i’ve forgotten, like how i think seitan is chicken when it’s nothing like)
  • everyone’s got a different experience. reading “helpful hint” guides like this is only as helpful as knowing this: your experience of being will never be anyone else’s. there will one day be a million “tips” posts out there one day, most of them made long after you’ve already finished the brief flicker of time they’re writing about. it’s best to understand–rather than holding your own experiences on trial as being “valid” or “not–that all these comments and posts come from a different human, from someone tempered by very different forces and experiences. Your own path will be just as strange and wonderful as any.
Just thought of something

In 10th grade, I sat down in class and there was a boy who liked me. So he sat beside me and I don’t remember too much that was said. I always remembered being a shy girl (and I still am) and I was always too afraid to say “no” and “please stop.”  He took it upon himself to place his hand on my thigh and caress it. This was a blatant display of affection and I didn’t say no.

I was too shy, too nervous.

I did tell him at points that his hand was going too high. I wish I told him to not touch me, I wish I was stronger then. This type of shit is what gets me being forcefully kissed by married men at clubs, or grinding on me despite my all-too-calm protest. For those I said no, but for them it wasn’t strong enough, they had to keep trying to convince me. I told a man one time I was gay (I feel bad on it now, using the gay community like that) to get him to leave me alone, but he insisted on trying to “convert me” as he constantly rubbed his lower half over me.

I need to learn to tell men when they make me uncomfortable, with conviction. I end up never being taken seriously because I laugh when I am nervous. It is something I always done, laugh, or smile slightly. It is like when others get their palms sweaty, I laugh… and men think I’m being a tease. 

But I am not.

You’re making me uncomfortable. 

Please stop.

ENOUGH, or, My Experiences With The Middle-Aged White Men Who Dominate Events Concerning British Music Journalism

Enough with retrospective panels about music journalism (I could stop right there) led by middle-aged white men (and again) who crusade against online music writing (in the form of a sole scape-goated young writer) despite clearly not having read any.

“Where are all the professional music journalists going to come from now?” There’s no such qualification (and never was, other than misplaced ego), to the form’s great benefit.

Enough with the falsehood that in the good ol’ days, opportunity to get read and paid and forge relationships with editors was open to all as opposed to today’s so-called unpaid, untethered digital wasteland. Literally a few dozen people had the privilege of passing through those storied music magazine newsrooms, and they were 95% the same kind of person, to the form’s great detriment.

If you still use “Buzzfeed” as a pejorative, you’re betraying both your prejudices, fear and ignorance. See also: “where are all the political bands?”

Enough with conferences that focus on music journalism’s past, and how much better it was. Enough with giving the old British rock writer hegemony the platforms to dominate these events. If the future doesn’t fit your programme – and in a way that’s not doomsdaying – scrap it.

Realise that the next wave of great music writers a) probably won’t just write about music, b) probably couldn’t care less about becoming part of the legacy you’ve appointed yourselves, because they have their own smarter, more inclusive, more astute, more representative things going on.

Enough with the idea that online music writing is confusing and lacks consensus. What is it that you’re looking for? Hand-holding? Some kind of consumer guide? Did you used to buy all the music papers? No? Exactly. Curate your own damn experience. Read challenges to your existence. Death to the idea of there being a few totemic gatekeepers dictating the dialogue.


Saying all that, tbh I’m delighted that these old men fear the internet as it more swiftly determines their impending obsolescence.

All of this underlines just how badly we need an EMP equivalent here. Who’s in?

Sex is a very intimate experience to me. Although I am not a virgin, the more I learned about the importance of sex, the spirituality of sex, the blessing of sex, the more I see the act as sacred. There is an intimacy that I desire, a vulnerability that I require, that I only want with the man who has declared before the world and before God that I am his soul mate. 

 This is only my experience. The bible talks about celibacy for men and women, but a lot of the rhetoric in Christianity discusses a woman saving herself for a man. I did not like this perspective. As a result I did my own prayer and research and discovered that for me it wasn’t about saving myself for anyone. It was about protecting my spirit and doing what God called me to do. I had relationships that were great and we had sex. I have no doubt that if me and my guy decided to start having sex, we would be fine. The world wouldn’t end, we wouldn’t go to hell, we would be like everyone else and it probably wouldn’t be a big deal. But we made this commitment together and with each passing day we grow stronger and deeper in our faith. 

 Abstaining is almost like fasting. You know, when you fast for lent or in preparation for something. You fast and realize that when you stop doing one thing it makes room for other things. That’s how I see our celibacy. In absence of sex we had to discover what intimacy and commitment and faith and love looked like in a way we never tried before. It forced us to grow up and be serious and move with a purpose. We had to learn how to say I love you and make each other feel loved and special and yes even sexy, without sex. It has brought us together in ways I couldn’t imagine. 

 At this point, abstaining is not difficult. We have been at this for years and were comfortable in our choice. We set up boundaries, and we both respect them. But I think what still makes it exciting is that every day we discover new intimacy. Whether is praying together or doing bible study together or just sharing things with each other that we never shared before. Its been an amazing experience, and I love being with someone as committed to our choice as I am. and as a person who has had sex before, i’m excited for the day when i will be able to discover a newness, and new intimacy, with the man i marry.

guys are so dumb, i’m sorry. i posted a selfie on a metal page i admin on facebook and i happen to be wearing my Mjölnir necklace. half the same people who LIKED AND COMPLIMENTED MY LOOKS AND HIT ON ME in the photo also liked a comment saying i was a poser and that i’m not actually Norse pagan.

do you see the hypocrisy or is that just me?

like, since i’m attractive, i have to be a poser and i’m not actually Norse pagan? like, i can’t be intelligent or believe in a religion because i’m conventionally attractive?

newsflash to a post i just saw on my dashboard: guys don’t realize girls are wearing makeup unless they’re wearing a LOT of it. i’ve been wearing makeup since i was 12 and when guys find out they’re like, “you DO?!" so those guys who are like, uhh i want a girl who doesn’t wear makeup, …no you don’t. makeup really helps and it’s great when girls wear makeup that looks natural.

that being said, makeup is really fun to do dramatically too. but at night. and for photoshoots. not everyday stuff.

Hi everyone, sorry to interrupt your regularly schedule pictures of Arizona.  I’m one of the co-mods and I have a favor to ask.

I’m a graduate student studying sociology at Northern Arizona University.  I am doing my Master’s thesis on trans men and their experiences living outside major metropolitan cities. I am looking for six guys to interview. In order to participate you have to be at least 18 or older, on HRT living socially as male, and not live in a major city. If you do live in a major city you may be able to participate as long as you have spent most of your life living in smaller communities/rural areas  Due to restrictions from my university, interviews must take place in person.  I currently live in Flagstaff, AZ and I am willing to drive to you depending on your location.

I will make all efforts to maintain confidentiality.  Any identifying information will be altered or removed completely.  This is extremely important to me.

If you have any questions or would like to participate, please let me know. I will be incredibly grateful. Thank you!

You can contact me through my blog sociolab

in my personal experiences, gay men are all devils and straight men are always the only men who are nice to me 

Paradise lost: an interview with Lana Del Rey (Electronic beats).

Interview made by Lisa Blanning , picture by Robert Carrithers.

<< Yeah. Like, I remember it was the San Francisco Chronicle or whatever who wrote this huge thing about me being an anti-feminist. But the thing is, I don’t really have any commentary on the female’s role in society. It was the same with my first song that got big, “Video Games”. People had criticisms about it being submissive and whatever, but nothing I ever wrote had a message. It was just my own personal experience, and it’s the same with “Ride”. I believe in free love and that’s just how I feel. It’s just my experience of being with different kinds of men and being born without a preference for a certain type of person. For me, that is my story in finding love in lots of different people, and that’s been the second biggest influence in my music. >>  My chosen quote.

The complete interview can be read here.

jane012607 asked:

This is so cute. It's so different too. Usually, Asians don't really mingle with other races - I speak from experience from my own family. The women and men look so happy. ❤️ Some of the women and men here really catch my eye. They're so beautiful 😍

Thank you, we’re glad you like our blog. 

something I’ve discovered about my sexuality is I definitely am more sexually attracted to cis or transmen but I prefer the company and companionship of women/other genders besides cis men and probably would be better off with a female or nonbinary/transmen/transwoman companion than a cis male. 

Because while not “every” cis male is a toxic piece of shit to be around, I’ve found in my past dating experiences that cis men tend to fall under these creepy flaws that I can’t deal with and they were all similar in nature. Flaws that would just bring me down and make me feel unhappy. I don’t get these kind of vibes from other genders. Even in semi-dating situations those flaws are much more apparent in cis men and as a companion or even as a friend they let me down more.

But I have never gotten to a sexual stage with any other gender besides cismen, so I’m not sure how I would react, if I would just be uninterested or unexcited or what. I’m generally an asexual to begin with but I still feel more aesthetic attraction towards androgynous or babyfaced men.

It’s like wanting a cat, but realizing you’re allergic, so you get a rabbit or dog instead

ive never dated anyone my age lmao

i learned after a few times that when you say no to dating boys they will stalk you and harass you so you just say yes. then i learned that they do the same thing when you break up with them. and that they no matter what you do theyre also going to force you to do stuff with them

so then i learned just not to talk to boys. theyre not that great anyway.

     I see a lot of these white/Asian  race play blogs that are laden with no shortage of racist labels and derogatory racial tones.   “Inferior Asians,” “Gook,”  “Chinky,”  Etc.  People are going to do what they want to do with their blogs, but I don’t like it.  I am no racist.   I just happen to be dom who finds Asian women to be the most beautiful on the planet.  I also have found that they are simply “hard-wired” for fun.   They typically have tiny, tight pussies, become out-of-control horny once aroused, are loud, ultra-sensitive and responsive, and multi-orgasmic.  They also tend to be thin, which I like. That has been my personal experience, at least, as a white male.  It seems white men/Asian women are a perfect match, racially.  I’m sure its the same with black men, but I can’t speak for them.. 
     Frankly, my wife is my sub.  The truth is that I love her deeply, and we have something most couples do not.  (I know, I was married twice before)   I do not look down on my wife, nor do I care to ever really hurt/injure her, or force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do.  I don’t make her walk around the house nude, or “be” a table for me to set a drink on, or any of that nonsense.  The plain truth is that the dom/sub is sex play for us, and nothing more.  We simply found that I am aroused by dominating her, and she is aroused by being dominated.  
      She was a virgin when we met.  As soon as she got over the initial pain of being “broken in,” almost from the start, she always loved being pounded hard, deep, and FAST.  She would even ask for it in pillow talk.  (HAMMER ME, baby!)  I suppose that’s how it started, in a way.   Then one night, when I was basically telling her what to do sexually, she surprised me by saying, “Yes, Master!”  
      Well, I didn’t need anymore prodding.  I took her lead, and we’ve been a dom/sub couple ever since.  Now, I don’t know what others REALLY do in their personal lives, Again, we are a perfect match in more than a few ways.  We talked about it once in bed, toward the beginning of our dom/sub awakening, and I wanted to make sure we were doing something she wanted to do, not something she was doing only to please me.  Her answer was simple:  “I like my man to take charge.”  
    Some of you reading this will recoil in disgust.  “Why, you’re no real dom at all- you’re a phony!”  Some of you may being saying.  Well, you have a right to your opinion.   At least what I’m telling you here is real, and is the truth.  When I write about the things I do to my sub, at least you’ll know its not all bullshit.
Now, I don’t know what everyone else does in their private lives, but lets be serious- we all know damned well that many of these people are completely full of shit, and are just playing out their fantasies on tumblr.  Hell, a number of them are probably 14 yoa boys spending all their time in front of the computer in their bedrooms- probably virgins.  Well, that’s their prerogative.  But before some of you write me off as a “phony,” just think about who is the real dom- the one who BSs you about how they are a dom 24/7, and their subs are waiting at the door for them when they get home, nude, on their knees, and wearing a collar- (I guess some may be out there) or me, when I’m telling you the real stuff that goes on between us?  
    At any rate, I’ve decided I will no longer re-blog anything that degrading on a racial level, or that uses any slurs.  I have up to this point, only when I found the posts highly hot, but from now on, I will either edit them and make them my own, or not re-blog them.  

anonymous asked:

Caryl positivity! Carol or Daryl: 1. Who misses coffee the most?. 2. Who steals the covers? 3. Who checks all the windows and doors every night before bed? 4. Who sneaks love notes into the other’s pockets? 5. Who holds Lil Asskicker more? Tag this as Caryl positivity and spread the Caryl love!

1.) Carol, most definitely. I feel like a morning cup of coffee (or three, or four…) was in order having to deal with that “lovely” husband of hers, let alone raising a child on top of that. Not that she didn’t enjoy being a caring mother, I’m sure she absolutely thrived on that. I just feel that with all of the external factors involved, she could use some extra energy to handle everything!

2.) This was a tough one, but I’m going to have to go with Carol yet again. In my experience, men tend to be very warm, almost like human teddy-bear companions. Combine that with Daryl’s superior musculature and redneck charm, I feel like he’d be the type to roll around in his heated sleep and manage to get wrapped around in the sheets despite his higher body temperature. Carol would awake randomly in a shivering spell, but smile slyly at the sight of her lover contained within their bedding, snoring in the most obnoxious, adorable way.

3.) Yet again, Carol, without a doubt. Since arriving in Alexandria, it has been clear that Carol has been anything but trusting (as she should be considering the group’s past history). However, any time Carol is away from home for the night, Daryl takes over this duty in honor of her, knowing that he couldn’t sleep peacefully unless he honored her habits completely.

4.) This is split equally between Carol and Daryl. I feel like Carol would initiate this tradition, dropping anecdotes in Daryl’s pockets before he left on runs so he would know that he had love to come back to when on runs. After Carol breaks the note-ice, I feel like Daryl would take the opportunity to leave little notes around the house before he left on any journeys, perhaps in his clothes that he knew she’d wash or in her cooking supplies that he knew she’d use to bake her famous cookies (which he so looked forward to enjoying when he returned to Alexandria, in more ways than one ;) )

5.) Contrary to popular opinion, I would have to say Daryl. Yes, Carol has more parenting experience and has been more present in Alexandria up through canon present. However, considering Carol’s experiences with losing children and the scene (I can’t remember exactly which episode, but I believe it was the episode in which they spend their first night in Alexandria) in which Daryl maintains a close eye over Judith in her crib, I feel like Daryl is the one spending the most time with Lil’ Asskicker. This has nothing to do with who loves that child more. I feel that both have an intense connection with her. However, I feel that developing any kind of bond with her beyond necessary would destroy Carol, and Daryl having known Carol since the beginning (and a decent gist of the Lizzie/Mika storyline) would result in Daryl stepping in and taking care of that child in all of the ways Carol could not emotionally. He would not be doing this just for the baby, but for, in NR’s words, “his girl”.

#caryl #carylpositivity #carolpeletier #daryldixon #protectivepookies

anonymous asked:

"This is my experience of men in love. I've been fortunate enough to see it first hand. :-) They CAN NOT physically stop themselves from talking (ad nauseum) about the object of their affections." this reminded me of the interview for a radio with the cast, last time in NY, which Cait didn't attend, and when asked about Claire, Sam started to talk and talk about Cait and some of the other actors had to tell him they were asked about Claire, hehe

Hahaha oh god that was funny. I think Cait’s name is constantly on the tip of his tongue and he’s just waiting to talk about her. I don’t know how anyone could say that he’s not in love with her. Poor guy isn’t very subtle…