A YouTuber AU SnowBaz fanfic for the Carry On Countdown
Simon Snow’s first YouTube video is one of my
favourites. It’s as painfully awkward as
any other YouTuber’s first video. He
sits up too straight in his chair, he smiles and laughs too mechanically, and
the film quality itself is poor, with half of his words lost to shoddy editing.
Yet despite all this, it’s adorable.
of course, it’s the origin of the biggest OTP on YouTube, SnowBaz.
guys,” Simon waves at the camera, his hand going all pixelated at the
movement. “Welcome to the first video on
my channel!” He’s inserted a sound
effect of people cheering. I have to
laugh. It’s so damn cringe-worthy.
goes on for a few moments, trying to make jokes and jump-cuts that work, when finally,
it’s everyone’s favourite part.
are you doing, Snow?” comes a voice from off-camera. My heart turns to mush.
new flatmate, or at least he was new at this point.
my first YouTube video,” Simon grins up at someone behind the camera. “Come say hi!”
the censor sounds old, like it was stolen from the year 2007.
looks a bit panicked, like he’s realizing that he’ll have to edit out the swear
word. A door slams somewhere out of the
my new flatmate,” he tells us. “His name
is Baz. He’s kind of a prat.”
you wait,” I whisper at my computer screen.
“Just you wait.”
and Baz do not get along. At all.
much is clear from the first video, but it become increasingly obvious as Simon
posts more frequently. He often films in
the living room, which drives Baz insane.
don’t you film in your own room?” he says, audibly annoyed.
lighting in there is terrible,” Simon protests.
I’d like to be able to walk around my own flat, if you don’t mind.”
ahead, no one’s stopping you,” Simon shrugs.
“Besides, the viewers keep saying they want to see you.”
old Baz. Sarcastic and full of
himself. They don’t appear to realize
it, but the two of them balance each other out perfectly.
by little, Baz begins to make his mark on Simon’s channel. At first we only hear him from off-screen,
offering his two bits about nearly everything Simon has to say. Many of his comments are admittedly quite
mean and uncalled for, but Simon never edits them out. Baz is the invisible heckler. Viewers begin to latch onto this weird relationship
of apparent hatred and, as YouTube viewers are wont to do, turn it into a new
ship. “SnowBaz” they call it, and before
long the comment sections on all of Simon’s videos are full of things like “I
ship it” and “OTP”.
not to fall victim to this shipping trend myself. It feels insensitive to me, shipping real
live people that I’ve never even met like they’re objects of sorts. But even I can’t deny that the two of them
would be cute together. Provided they
stop hating each other.
Baz appears onscreen for the first time.
on the couch in the background, facing away from the camera. All we can see is long black hair. He only moves when he’s shouting ridicule at
Simon’s words. Once he turns his head
further to make himself heard, and we catch a glimpse of the light brown skin
of his face. This time the comments are
all “is that Baz?” and “OMG BAZ”.
that he starts to appear more often.
Sometimes he’s facing the screen, looking down at his phone or a
book. He’s tall, and his hair reaches
his shoulders. The expression on his
face goes between concentration and a sneer, that latter of which he reserves
for his heckling. It doesn’t take long
for people to start commenting on how attractive he is. Still Simon leaves all the footage of Baz in
his videos, not hiding a single rude comment from his viewers.
Simon tries to get Baz to join him for a “meet my flatmate” video. Baz responds simply by flipping Simon off in
the background, which Simon has to pixel out.
He’s gotten better at editing at this point.
Simon posts daily vlogs on days when he does things that he considers
exciting. The things that Simon finds
exciting are too cute for words. They
tend to be little events like going to a coffee shop, things that are almost
mundane but for some reason they excite him.
He does this thing where he dances when he’s excited. He’ll bob his head cheerfully as he walks,
glad to just be out. He’s gone to the
grocery store with Baz a few times in his vlogs. Those videos are some of the best ones. They bicker about everything from which kind
of milk to get to who gets to carry the baskets. Sometimes we can see Baz’s mouth quirk like
he’s trying not to laugh, like all this bickering is just a game for him. Of course, this sends the SnowBaz shippers
into a frenzy, the idea that maybe, just maybe, Baz doesn’t hate Simon as much
as he lets on.
there’s one video on Simon’s channel that is the absolute bread of life for
anyone who ships the two of them. Simon
is doing a Q&A, and as usual Baz is sitting and reading in the background.
question is from Twitter,” Simon says, reading off of his phone. “They ask ‘Are you in love with anyone right
if you look closely, you can see Baz go rigid.
Simon leans in close to the camera, “I have been messaging with someone quite a
lot. I don’t know who the person is, but
we’ve gotten really close and I’m starting to think -”
you keep it down, Snow,” Baz pipes up, his voice tight. “I’m trying to read over here.”
doesn’t speak of it any further, but Baz sneaks glances at the back of Simon’s
head more than once before the video is over.
I don’t know how Simon could have not noticed it. Certainly every single one of his viewers
did, which is to say over a million people.
Perhaps love is completely daft.
I arrive home from work on a particularly rainy day in October, I am delighted
to open my computer and find that Simon is in the middle of a livestream. Comments flow constantly from the sidebar and
I settle in to join the party. He’s in a
different room this time, one with a neatly made bed on which he sits, and I
gather that it’s his room. It looks so
clean, but I wonder if there’s a disaster hiding behind the camera.
leans towards us like he’s trying to read all of the comments and questions as
they flood in. He gets a lot of I love you’s and he grins in response,
trying to return as many of them as possible.
got to go soon,” he tells us and I sigh in disappointment, “but I’ll answer a
few more questions first.” He’s quiet
for a minute as all the viewers catch up with the stream. “Here’s one: ‘Did you find out who was
messaging you so much?’” He pauses
before answering. “Funny you should ask,
because yes, I did, and that’s a perfect segway into what I wanted to talk
about.” He shifts on his bed. “I have a bit of an announcement -”
door opens behind him, and Baz in all his glory appears in it.
start flying in of “BAZ” and “OMG”
are you doing?” Baz asks without a hint of a sneer in his voice.
filming a live show,” Simon tells him.
He seems… nervous?
live show, eh?” Baz strolls over and –
wonder of wonders – sits down on the bed next to Simon. We’ve never seen him this close to the
camera, and his eyes are this lovely mix of gray and green.
also never seen him this close to Simon before.
heart kicks up a notch. I’ve fallen down
the slippery slope and now there’s no denying that I ship it completely. I grab a pillow to hold to my chest and go
into fangirl-mode, overanalysing every inch of their proximity. With a click I maximize the screen, blocking
the other comments from my view. I want
to see every pixel of this.
was just going to make that little announcement,” Simon says, staring at his
hands in his lap.
Baz nods, apparently understanding. “Go
on, then. Carry on, Simon.”
Did he just call him Simon?
He never calls him Simon!
“I can’t do it if
you’re here!” Simon protests.
gives a shrug. “Then I’ll tell them.”
takes Simon by the collar and kisses him.
scream into my pillow.
and Baz are kissing, right now, in front of millions of people.
practically hear the collective aneurism that the fangirls are currently
still kissing, and Simon is grinning against Baz’s mouth. It’s the most genuine smile he’s ever graced
the internet with, and it’s not even for us.
tearing up, I’m so happy for them.
lets Simon go and turns to smirk at the camera.
“That one’s for all you SnowBaz shippers out there. Don’t think we don’t know.” He winks.
He fucking winks.
then he leaves.
turns back to the camera, his cheeks red and his lips puffy. He grins sheepishly.
yeah,” he stammers, “that’s what I was gonna tell you about.”