my dog is kind of stupid

headcanon where everything’s fine after infinity wars. there’s still some awkwardness, but the avengers are back to being okay with each other. steve is trying his best to win tony back, and tony, being the little adorable shit that he is, loves to play hard to get, because, hey, steve kind of deserves it, okay? steve tries everything. e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. he’s so desperate that at some point he even tries some stupid crap lines like,

steve: if i were a cat i’d choose to spend all my 9 lives with you, tony

tony, casually sipping coffee: i prefer dogs

rp sentence starters using lines from leigh bardugo’s work , six of crows 

“ of course they were wrong. ”
“ every act of violence was deliberate. ”
“ every favor came with enough strings attached to stage a puppet show. ”
“ it’s always good to have a country in debt to you. ”
“ this night smelled like violence. ”
“ it’s about sending a message. ”
“ i’m not going to bet on my own death. ”
“ i don’t know what you are, but you’re not made right. ”
“ when everyone knows you’re a monster, you needn’t waste time doing every monstrous thing. ”
“ greed bows to me. ”
“ i don’t think gods work that way. ”
“ men mock the gods until they need them. ”
“ are you going to tell us anything else about your miraculous plan? ”
“ there’s a difference between confidence and arrogance. ”
“ i’m not sure i have a heart to give anymore. ”
“ unless you can be useful, go away. ”
“ i’ll make you wish for death. ”
“ i’m not in a very rational mood. ”
“ you do not argue with a man covered in blood and a knife up his sleeve. ”
“ look for miracles and listen to bedtime stories. ”
“ if they want my blood, let them come for it. ”
“ it is an insult to the dog to call you one. ”
“ i’m going to feed you to a pack of hungry hounds. ”
“ congratulations on your recent advancement to murderer of rank. ”
“ i’ve spent most of this last year trying to find a way to set things right. ”
“ has a true word ever left your lips? ”
“ i might have loved you too. ”
“ your conscience is interfering with your memory. ”
“ i’m a very valuable investment. ”
“ i don’t want to go back to sleep yet. ”
“ at least we’re both the same kind of stupid. ”
“ i’ve been looking for an excuse to talk to you for two days. ”
“ i don’t want your prayers. ”
“ our luck is changing. ”
“ that seems like cheating. ”
“ we both must take the risk together. ”
“ you’ll see who wins in the end. ”
“ don’t leave me. ”
“ someone had to pay. ”
“ doesn’t matter how big the gun is if you don’t know where to point it. ”
“ we’ve managed to get ourselves locked into the most secure prison in the world. ”
“ the trick is in getting back up. ”
“ i’m not going to pretend everything is okay. ”
“ i don’t want to kill people, not really. ”
“ i’m already a ghost. ”
“ better terrible truths than kind lies. ”
“ the heart is an arrow. ”
“ how long have you been holding onto nothing? ”
“ i practice the art of ‘pull his shirt over his head and punch till you see blood’. ”
“ i made a bad call, and i deserve the blame for it. ”
“ if we don’t survive this night, i will die unafraid. ”
“ you should have drowned. ”
“ you don’t deserve miracles. ”
“ if your god is so delicate, maybe you should get a new one. ”
“ we really need to get more suitable friends. ”
“ you know they would not offer you mercy. ”
“ let them live in shame instead. ”
“ we are all someone’s monster. ”
“ i want you to stay. i want you to … i want you. ”
“ and how will you have me? ”
“ give me a reason to stay. ”
“ we all carry our sins. ”

The vagabond and his dog

Dont even ask lmao. The breed is a King Charles Cavelier for anyone who’s interested thy are like, the least scary dog in the world.

The alleyway is cold and unforgiving.

The rest of the crews panicked yelling had died with his ear piece and so he finds himself half dead and alone, bleeding out behind an overflowing dumpster. Not quite the dramatic death he’d imagined. It’s pathetic actually. He coughs into his hand and wipes the blood on his shirt.

Ryan hears footsteps and swears under his breath. He’s in no condition to defend himself, if he’s spotted he’s fucked.

They come to a stop a few feet away from where he was hiding and he holds his breath.

“You’re sure he came down here?”

“I know I saw something!”

There is a rustle and he presses himself closer to the wall. The assailants swear.

“A fuking dog? Are you serious you saw a dog?”

There’s a muffled yelp and Ryan waits until the footsteps fade before crawling out. 

It is a dog. A tiny dog. It’s almost as pitiful as he is and he can’t even tell the colour of its fur behind the dirt and grime. It spots him and climbs to its feet shakily, snarling. Considering its barely reaches above his ankles, Ryan thinks that’s a rather ambitious move.

He sits in front of it and crosses his legs. Slowly its hackles lower and its growl turns into a small whimper. He reaches out a hand, ignores the bared teeth and picks it up.

“You saved my life huh?”

It’s the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

-

He passes out.

Ryan wakes up with the little dog bathed and clean, snuggled up to his side. They make an odd pair. Her scruffy coat and tiny body next to his blood stained form. He thinks he likes it.

As soon as he’s walking - and doesn’t have Jack breathing down his neck - he goes out and buys her a bandana with a skull on it. Jack thinks it’s adorable, Gavin thinks it’s stupid. Geoff kind of looks like the word is ending. Ryan is too distracted feeding his little dog treats to care.

When she finally understands sit the glee on his face is probably terrifying.

He doesn’t take her on heists. Of course he doesn’t, she’s small and breakable and well, hardly intimidating. Turns out he doesn’t have to because she finds a way of making it there on her own.

Michaels maniacal laughter is cut off into a startled yell when he spots the little dog in the rearview mirror, grooming her paws as if she’s meant to be there and she isn’t surrounded by screaming and explosions. Michael swerves and screams when Ryan appears at the window, opening the door, tossing Michael out and throwing him his explosives before climbing in the driving seat, driving her home.

The others return an hour later to him scolding her.

The next time the go on a heist, Ryan make a point of taking off his mask, giving her a look and locking her in his bedroom.

This time she’s in Geoff’s car.

In the end they realise she can’t be stopped, Ryan also realises that she’s a crafty little shit who somehow manages to remain unharmed. Their enemies very quickly learn that any attack on the dog is the worst sin they can commit.

He watches her latch on to the leg of one of their enemies amidst gunfire and blood shed and decides to call her Hurricane.

When she turns, gives him a smug look and sits on her haunches he decides its appropriate.


—-

Being best friends with John Wick would include:

Originally posted by thebloodybaronishere

It’s my first imagine\headcanon in English, it was pretty interesting and cool :D (english isn’t my native language)
Thank you @my-dear-watson and @queenselana for the support! It’s important to me!
So, enjoy and please leave some feedback!

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Of Stitches and Broken Bones

Originally posted by xopsychogirlxo

Summary: Bucky works as a nurse in the ER and you keep getting hurt. You fall in love.

Warning: minor injury, major injury

Main masterlist


A/N: This is based on that prompt, but it changed quite a bit along the way. I hope you like it anyway! 

P.S.: my medical knowledge is nonexistent, sorry for the inaccuracies.


1. The one with the wine glass

You fell for the first time immediately after coming out of your mother’s womb. The doctor’s hands had slipped and you’d been dropped on the cold hospital floor. That first incident had only been the premise of what would become your entire life.

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A Blue Prince To Own, Chapter 2

“Lance, you won’t be needed for this mission in particular. You should train today while the others fulfill their duties.”

That’s what the princess said three hours ago when I woke up to the others being gone. I promised I would, but I don’t have the energy, really. I don’t have the energy for a lot of things. I just want to go take naps in Blue’s cockpit all the time. I’ve just been stretching the entire time, pretending to get warmed up for something cool every time Allura or Coran passes by.

But, I can’t do anything cool. I’ve never been too physically gifted besides being bendy and stretchy as hell, other than that I have nothing. I’ve been getting my ass kicked in friendly sibling wrestling for years and getting my ass kicked by people at school even more often. I’m not going to lie and say I was completely a victim, I’ve got a mouth on me, everyone knows it. Hunk’s usually the only one who can stop me from saying stupid crap because he’s not as grossed out when I lick his hand.

Really, I wish I could trade my flexibility for some muscle because I’m kind of sick and tired of being a wimp. I’ve always been a skinny guy and I’ve accepted that it doesn’t really matter how much I train, it’s just the way my body is. Skinny applies even more now that I’m growing like a weary dog that’s too depressed to eat. Don’t get me wrong, food is great. I’m just losing the will to get it from the plate to my mouth everyday. I wish my armor would just slink off of me and clank loudly to the pristine white floor so that maybe someone would look over and realize I’m decaying.

Maybe I’m being dramatic, I think as I slide into full split and lean forward apathetically. When I sigh it feels like I’m breathing out my life. As soon as Allura and Coran stop walking past the training deck to make sure I’m not goofing off, I grab a pillow and my jacket and book it to Blue. I may not be able to fight off a hunkering monster or a bulky soldier, but damn I can run. I’ve been running all my life, really. That sounds dark. It is.

It takes a little longer to fall asleep because I’m so restlessly exhausted, but I’m determined. I get there, eventually. I haven’t had dreams in a while, I’m kind of thankful. I don’t have to dream of how my family’s getting on, thinking I’m dead, or if they think I just stopped responding to their emails and letters. It’s just like the Garrison to cover up their mistakes, namely in letting three cadets and a dropout steal their Shiro, by saying some shit like we ran away out of rebellion or not saying anything at all. Telling the teachers and students we all were expelled and leaving the parents a wreck.

So, yeah, I’m eager not to dream. But, I do dream. And it’s a painful one. I’m under the water, blinking up at the surface, unable to reach there. I’m trying to keep stale oxygen as it expires in my lungs, but the pressure is beginning to wretch my mouth open. A big bubble escapes and floats to the surface, so now I’m choking but when my gaze follows it, I spot everyone up there, floating ; Hunk, Allura, Pidge, Keith, Shiro, Matt, even Slav.

I’m being yanked to the depths, there’s chains on my wrists, ankles. They’re so heavy. I’m sinking, sinking, sinking. Everyone’s up there laughing, I just can’t reach them. Eventually, I can’t help it and I let out my air in one motion. I’m struggling so hard to scream with everything I have, but I can’t breathe. They’re… they’re so happy without me. They’re smiling. They’re happy. Maybe… this is how it’s meant to be. I… I give up. I let myself sink like the dead weight I am. I take a lungful of water. I prepare to die.

I jolt awake with a small electric current pulsing through my body and the sound of Blue’s panicked voice echoing, explaining that I started choking in my sleep and that she freaked and woke me up.

“I’m fine,” I gasp, clutching my chest over my thundering heart, “fine, just… I had a bad dream, but I’m okay.”

As if on cue, Lotor appears on the holo screen, looking significantly casual as apposed to his royal finery from before. His white hair is in a messy top bun, there’s glasses perched on his nose and he’s wearing a thick white turtleneck. He looks softer this way. I… can’t help but think he’s rather cute in this light.

“Greetings and Salutations, my Lance! It is I, Prince Lotor, heir to the Galra empire!” He announces in his overzealous way.

I wipe the sleep from my eyes and smile at him. “Are you always going to say that when we speak, Princey?”

“Indefinitely, my Lance!” His brows furrow and he gets a rather serious look about him. “Though, I come with important questions. My source of information has informed me that you were not with your team on the latest mission. Might you explain why? Have you fallen ill? Are you injured?”

My smile falters. Of course he would innocently ask about the missed mission ordeal, though it only seems to matter to me. “Yeah, I’m… a little sick in the head. But, they just left while I was asleep because they didn’t want me there. I… get in the way. Pretty useless, haha.”

I pull my knees up to my chest and when I look back up, the Galra’s expression is positively murderous, rivaling even Keith’s default expression. A hard feat to surpass, my man.

“Anyone who should think you are useless is unwise, my Lance. You are precious and your body should only be lavished with the finest of silks, only touched with the most delicate of hands and the softest of lips, you should be protected like a jewel. Kept happy and loved with me for the rest of eternity. Never exposed to the inadequacies of a universe that would take for advantage and abuse you. Happy forever, with me. Owned by me, my Lance. I should be the only one you need until we both reach our end.”

“That’s… that sounds so nice.“ In the back of my mind, I know that he is delusional with something he thinks is love. I know that I should remind him love is not obsession, that I can’t be owned, that I will do whatever I want with whoever I want, but my heart aches so bad. I know somewhere he’s reached me at my lowest possible point, when I am weak and powerless emotionally and mentally. He has the upper hand because I am not strong and I reach for him. “I want to be happy.” There’s a flood of tears behind my eyes. In an uncaring world, he’s spouting nonsense, but it’s a beautiful nonsense that I want so much more of. “I’m so sad all the time.” I’m crying now, shaking. “Please, I just - anything, anything to not be here, they hate me, I’m so worthless here, I - ”

There’s a rippling growl that comes from the screen. When he snarls, his teeth are all sharp and flat. Not like most Galra. I should be so afraid, but the apathy from everyone ignoring me is seeping in. He doesn’t scare me when he should. Maybe it’s the space between us that’s made me fearless. “Soon, you will be mine, gorgeous Blue Prince. We will rule together. We will be unstoppable. I’ll never let anyone make you feel so unhappy again. I’ll never let them get close enough. I will own you, Blue Prince.”

The dark possessiveness is so hypnotizing. I’m addicted to the relaxed happiness he gives me, the feeling of security, the feeling of reaching the surface of the ocean I’m drowning in. Fat tears are dripping off my chin. I’m tired of holding everything inside, of being second best, a seventh wheel, a mistake. I want to be someone’s Blue Prince, I like the sound of it. I’m tired of crying alone in the shower late at night when I can’t hold it all in anymore. I’m tired of dragging my nails down my face when my depression is violent, I’m tired of this sadness sucking me so dry.

The connection times out. I fall asleep again and Blue shocks me awake again, telling me that the others are back from their mission. So, I drag my feet to the central controls and find everyone at their stations, working, except for Hunk. He’s playing a video game on some platform Pidge must’ve fixed up. Maybe… he’ll want to hang later?

“How’d the mission go?” I ask, collapsing into my own station and drawing my hood down.

“It went surprisingly well, Lance.” Shiro responds airily. “Thanks for asking.”

I smile faintly. Hey, at least they were doing good without me. I’m glad that… I’m glad to see the team is fine if I ever happen to… go.

“Did you do anything useful today?” Keith asks from where he’s cleaning his knife.

He wants me to get mad. He’s provoking me. He thinks I’m stupid. Is he that far off? I’m too empty to even take the bait like I’m supposed to. “I trained for a few, then chilled with my girl, Blue. Almost got electrocuted, super dangerous stuff.”

“Yeah, well, I asked if you did something useful.” He mutters in response. What the hell is his damage?

I throw my head back, grin cockily. “I get that you’re jealous that I’m much better than you at piloting and combat, but you don’t have to be a dick about it, Keithy boy. One day, you might be as great as me.”

“Please, I’ll remind you that you were a cargo pilot and you look like you weigh ten pounds. I wound crush you in hand to hand combat. In fact, you would fall into my fist before I could ever throw a punch.”

“Dang, you Galra just never wanna play fair. Reminder, I punched Sendak and saved - ”

“Lance, stop starting a fight.”

Of course. That’s Shiro’s Reprimanding Voice™. Most commonly directed at me. I’m just a burden to them. Lotor might think I’m worthy of his obsession, but they don’t even think I’m worthy to stand beside them as equals. Everything is my fault all the time. I’m not even worthy enough to point out our leader’s bias towards his precious, gifted cowboy.

“Sorry, Shiro. I just…” Why can’t I fight beside you guys? Why do I mess up all the time? Why is some delusional Galra Prince the only one who seems to care about me? Why… why can’t I just go with him since I’m so unwanted here?

“Yeah, well that’s no reason to come in here and provoke. Just…” He sighs. I’m sorry. I feel like crying. God, I’m such a pussy. “Try and be a little less - ”

“Less Lanceish. Got it, my dude.” I send him double finger guns and a wink before getting up and making some excuse like I have to go clean Blue (which I do, but that’s not what I’m doing) so I can flee to my room. I fall face first into my bed.

Shiro, believe me, if I could be less Lance, I would.

Chapter 3: https://langst-mccpain.tumblr.com/post/163260781795/a-blue-prince-to-own-chapter-3

Tyler Seguin: Then There’s You

Originally posted by mapleloafs

FLuffY Seggy

word count: 1304

warnings: some sexual innuendo



All day you had been insanely busy at your office job. Finally, getting a chance to settle down at your lunch break you got to check your multiple snapchat notifications from Jamie Benn. The team was back to conditioning together before the start of the season and apparently the boys had been teasing Ty about you all morning. Your relationship had been going strong for about 6 months. In the beginning, before it was official, you had been weary about how serious he was about you. It wasn’t until Jamie began sending you snap videos of Tyler drunk and talking about you endlessly that you truly gave him a chance. Since then, the endless videos of teasing your boyfriend were a daily occurrence.

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Paws - Jason Todd

Prompt: “ Dick Grayson / Jason Todd (your choice!) x reader where reader just got an alaskan mamaluke puppy and all of the reader’s attention is on the puppy? how you choose to write is really up to you! x” (x) requested by @tgwltw

A/N: I decided to go with Jason. Hope you like it!




     Jason sighed in relief when home came into sight. He had been away on a mission with his brothers for the past week and was glad to get home to you. It was late and the window of your shared apartment were dark, he didn’t expect you to be still awake. So he was as quiet as he could be when he opened the window next to the fire escape and climbed in.
      Loud barking made him jump. His guns appeared in his hands before he even registered that there was a dog. Or more of a puppy. It stood a few feet away from him, barking as loud as it could. Jason starred at it, his mind failing to come up with a reason as to why there was a dog in his home.
     Lured out by the barking you entered the room, holding a baseball bat ready to strike at whoever the intruder was. Seeing it was Jason you quickly dropped your weapon and rushed forward to greet your boyfriend. “You scared me.” you admitted. The puppy, seeing your reaction to the stranger, stopped barking and watched you carefully.
     Putting his guns away Jason took his helmet off. Turning to you he rose an eyebrow at you and shot the puppy a glance before shaking his head. You laughed when you saw him pout. His eyes returned to you, drinking in the sight of you.  He had missed you. Reaching out he pulled you in for a kiss, earning a smile from you as you drew your arms around his neck.
     The puppy, not understanding what you were doing, barked. At first Jason only rolled his eyes, but then you turned away without giving him a kiss and bend down, calling your dog. Crossing his arms, the vigilante glared at the canine. Well, wasn’t that just great.
     Hesitant because of the stranger the puppy shambled over into your waiting arms. “Such a good boy. You’re watching out for me, aren’t you?” you cooed to your four-legged friend, rubbing his ear. Wild tail-wagging was your answer. “Yeah you are. But Jason isn’t going to hurt us, he is living with us.” you explained to the puppy.
     You were unaware of how Jason was watching you. He would admit, it was cute how your entire face lit up when you were looking at the puppy. Even if he didn’t like the animal and would have it rather that he would have been the one you were looking at like that.
     Looking up you signed for Jason to kneel next to you. it wasn’t hard to guess what you wanted and really he didn’t want to, but one look into your face and he just couldn’t say no. With a sigh he crouched down and held out a hand for the puppy to sniff.
     "Max, this is Jason.“ you told the dog. Still petting him you turned to Jason. "Max is a alaskan mamaluke. I found him abandoned on the streets one day on the way back from buying groceries. And we did talk about getting a dog.”
     He studied the dog as the latter did the same with him. Finally Max barked and Jason sighed. “We did talk about it.” he admitted. Mainly because he just hadn’t been comfortable about leaving you alone at home each time he had to on patrol or a longer mission. “But I thought we would pick out one together.”
     Understanding you nodded. “I know.” you agreed, turning back to Max. “But he was all alone and needed a home.” You picked up your puppy and sat him in your lap, facing Jason. “Besides, can you really say no to this face?”
     How you would react if he did was the real question here. For Jason could say no to the the dog, no question. A laugh ran from your lips as you tried to avoid getting licked by the affectionate puppy and he felt his resistance  break down. You clearly loved your new pet and he wouldn’t hurt you by telling you to give it away. “We see how it works out.” he said and reached out to scratch Max’s ear. This earned him the brightest smile from you.


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What Happens In Vegas... (Part 1)

Originally posted by nerdyfandomimagines

Summary: After a nasty breakup, you head to Vegas to try and have some fun, only to find yourself completely overwhelmed and alone. However, your bartender comes to the rescue, making you an offer you don’t want to refuse. Thanks to him, your week long vacation certainly turns out differently than you could have ever expected.

Author’s Note: This is my first ever Bucky story and I am so excited! It was written for @bionic-buckyb‘s AU Writing Challenge in celebration of 5k followers. My prompt was ‘vegas’, so I really hope I did it justice! I’m planning on turning this into a mini-series, so please, let me know what you think!!! 

Warnings: Language; mentions of cheating; pure, teeth rotting fluff; heavy make-out session

Word Count: Roughly 5,000 (yikes)

*******************************************************************************************

Sliding onto the stool with a sigh, you propped your chin on your hand and stared at the colorful bottles of various alcohols in front of you. This was so not how you wanted to spend this night, but it was better than locking yourself in your room like a hermit. If you were being honest, just thinking about the next few days made anxious nerves twist in your stomach. This trip was mistake, I should’ve just left well enough alone-

“What can I get you, sweetheart?” The deep voice broke your trance, bringing your attention to the bartender.

“I’ll have a shot of Patrón,” you mumbled, straightening up and pointing at the bottle. “Silver, please.” You watched as he poured the liquid into the glass, picking it up and slamming it back as soon as it was full. Shoving it back toward him with a grimace, you cleared your throat before speaking again, trying to talk around the burn. “Hit me.”

Not taking your eyes off the glass, you watched as he poured you another, once again slamming it back and repeating the request. After the third, you needed a break.

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anonymous asked:

renovation au stevebucky, thinking they're being Subtle (TM): "we need an extra huge custom bed b/c we have threesomes sometimes and y'know what if we found a 3rd person we fell for and wanted to add to our relationship permanently and needed the room??? just a thought exercise haha????? completely unrelatedly do you think there's enough space for a workshop in the basement"/ tony, thinking: is this their way of telling me they're interested in someone else?? pepper: *facepalming in background*

Pepper would be so torn lol. On one hand she’s sworn off of being involved in Tony’s love life ever since the Tiberius debacle when she’d walked in on Ty sweet-talking Tony while Tony clutched at his bruised cheek and looked like he was about to accept Ty’s apology (he still has a restraining order against her, but whatever, they needed to surgically remove her stiletto from his thigh so she won). These guys look like they couldn’t hurt a fly except by accident and then they’d cry about it.

On the other hand… This is two guys who could break Tony’s heart. And they’re pretty big. She could probably defend Tony from one of them but she’d be hopelessly overpowered by both of them. She confides in her friend Natasha. “Steve and Bucky are big doofy dogs and all you’d have to do is raise your voice to scare them. But don’t worry they’ve been gushing about Tony to me so they’re sincere. Stupid, but sincere.”

Pepper thinks about that for a while. “The last guy who mistreated Tony had to have my stiletto surgically removed from his thigh.” She gives Natasha an intense look. “Tell them that.”

(”I am both frightened and aroused,” Bucky admits.

Natasha shrugs. “Yeah that’s how I felt too.”)

i-am-the-altman  asked:

Yuri walks outside one evening to find a (very handsome) stranger (Victor) drunkenly trying to "steal" his dog from the backyard (by that i mean he's just crouching there petting it. And sort-of crying. Someone help him)

“What are you doing?”

There is a man in his back yard.  There is not supposed to be a man in his back yard, unless Vicchan suddenly learned how to shape shift, which would be really scary because what if he could turn into an octopus or something too?  It would be really stupid and humanocentric to assume he would only go dog to person.  If he became a fish while Yuuri was at the store he could die!

Anyway.  Dude.  In the yard.  Crying.  That seems wrong.

“I’m not crying!” says the crying man in his yard.  “I s-swear I’m not!”

“Doubt dot jay-pee-gee,” Yuuri says because he is apparently a dork who says that kind of thing out loud.  “Vicchan?”

“My name is Viktor and I live here,” says the very pretty crying man.  That’s weird.  Vicchan’s name is Viktor.  “Please marry me.”

“Why would I do that,” Yuuri asks incredulously.  “Why would I ever do that?  Vicchan is–no way.”

There is a bark.  Yuuri jumps about three feet in the air and actually screeches.  That was a Vicchan bark, but the man in the yard didn’t make that noise!

“Vicchan?!”

A tiny wiggly beautiful perfect little puppy wriggles out of the man’s arms, and the man starts crying harder.

“Don’t leave meeee!” he wails.  “You’re too cuuuuuute!”

Vicchan trots up to Yuuri and flops over on top of his feet.  Yuuri picks him up.  “I’m confused,” he says.  “If Vicchan is right here, who are you?”

“I’m Viktor,” Viktor says.  “I am drunk and I love your dog.  I also have a dog.  Please marry me?  She’s a beautiful dog, she’ll love you when we move in together, you know!”

“How did you even get into my yard?” Yuuri asks, nonplussed.  “It’s fenced in?”

“Determination,” Viktor says.  “I had to pet the dog.  You would understand if you saw Makkachiny-poo.”

“I think you should reevaluate your proposal in the morning,” Yuuri says, laughing a little, because he gets it, really.  He’d climb a fence to pet a dog too, when drunk.  “You can sleep on my couch if you want.”

“Okay!” says Viktor, happily, as if he wasn’t crying over Vicchan’s perfection literally two goddamn seconds ago.  “I love you, future husband!”

(It makes a great meet-cute story to tell people at their wedding, a few years down the line.)

tickets ~ zach herron

requested: yes

Sorry to such a bother but I thought of an idea! It’s the Zach anon again haha, but I was thinking of something like actions speak louder than words? Where he doesn’t think he loves the reader but his actions show he does but doesn’t realize it until later, kinda like the boys songs “words I didn’t say”? Maybe the reader gets a bf and he tries to convince her he loves her more and she tried to move on from zach but cant. Sorry that’s so jumbled but something like that would be cute! Thanks babe!

summary: with a boyfriend, y/n struggles to confront zach about her feelings.

warning(s): cursing (tbh can’t remember but probably)

word count: 2728

author’s note: i absolutely love this idea!! that’s one of my favorite songs so it was really fun to write for me. i hope you like it love:)


I couldn’t help but let out a small giggle as my best friend stared at me from across the kitchen table in the early morning. My voice was sore and my throat was dry, but a hoarse laugh left my throat at the silly faces that Zach had made to get me to smile in the slightest way.

My lips sipped at the coffee mug, my eyes closed so that I wouldn’t choke from laughing while i drank. As i put the cup down, I let out another laugh, Zach’s facial expression changing.

“stop,” i whined at him, “it’s too early to laugh”

he made a different face, “it’s never too early to laugh, y/n” 

i shook my head, letting out another chuckle at my obnoxiously hilarious best friend. his face turned to a smiley one that i couldn’t help but return. zach was too cute when he smiled and it was impossible not to return it, “are we still on for pitch perfect 3?” 

“i thought you’d forget about that,” he playfully rolled my eyes, “if we must see it, then fine. We’re still on” 

“of course we must see it!” i stared at him, “we’ve seen the other two together. It’d be shameful not to see the third one together” 

“to be fair, you did force me to see the other two as well,” Zach defended his former statements.

“yes, but you ended up loving them,” I explained and he shook his head.

“no, i loved the first one. the second one was ok” 

I shook my head, “it was funny!” 

“yeah, but what’s the point in a third one? what could they possibly do that they haven’t done already?” 

“i don’t know! that’s why we have to go see it!” He groaned and slid down in his seat as I giggled, taking another sip of my coffee.


Excitement traveled through my body as I arrived at the Why Don’t We household. I didn’t bother knocking, knowing that at least Zach was home, due to my calling prior to arriving.

I sprinted up the stairs and into his bedroom. Zach sat on his bed, a guitar in his arm as he played around with it. I looked at him and he laughed at my lack of breath from running up a flight of stairs. 

My body collapsed on his bed, my head staring up at his as he leaned over me with a smile on his face. Everything inside of me was bursting with happiness as I stared at him.

“so are you gonna tell me why you’re so excited?” he questioned with a slight laugh, strumming one final chord before setting the guitar down in the stand and staring at me. I sat up with a wide smile.

“you know jake?” 

zach nearly rolled his eyes, “yes, i know your boyfriend” 

“wellll, he’s taking me to the rangers-kings game tomorrow!” I squealed, “it’s an anniversary present” 

“when’d he tell you about this, y/n?” his eyebrows furrowed, rather than him being excited for me.

“just an hour ago, when i saw him. since you know, our three months is next week and he wanted to surprise me” 

zach nodded his head, looking down a little bit sadly.

i stared at him, confused by his response, “what’s wrong?”

he shook his head, “it’s nothing. i’m happy for you guys, i am” 

i didn’t believe a single piece of bullshit that left his mouth. my eyes stared into his, “no i’m serious. what’s wrong?” 

he sighed, staring at me with indecisiveness. zach took a moment before standing up to go towards his desk. i watched his every move, staring at his hands as they dug through his desk drawer. within a minute, he pulled out two pieces of paper, “i bought these about a month ago for you. I knew you were excited about the Rangers being in town and they were only playing here once this year, the other two games being in New York. I told Jake that I’d wanted to get you the tickets, but i guess i never told him that i got them” 

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darksakura94  asked:

Well... How are you, guys? How is your actual relation with Stan's gang? And Clyde, Token, Jimmy...? Sorry if anything is "inentendible"? I'm Spanish jeje..

TWEEK: Oh, we can answer this easy! I’ll grab some paper.
CRAIG: Shit, gonna get all artistic huh?
TWEEK: Shut up, dude. I’m a great drawer.

TWEEK: Okay so, Stan’s gang are all kinda dicks. I had my fill of them when I had to be part of their group..
CRAIG: They all still owe me 100$..
TWEEK: Yeah, overall theyre just kinda bad news.
CRAIG: Why’d you color in Kyle with the white crayon?
TWEEK: Because he’s literally that white, dude.

TWEEK: Clyde is a pretty cool guy to have around. He’s stupid, but it’s like how a dog is stupid. It’s an endearing kind of stupid.
CRAIG: I bet him he couldn’t eat 20 doritos locos tacos in one sitting and that night he called me and I had to comfort him while he was on the toilet.
TWEEK: Gross, omfg-

TWEEK: Token is really chill but also has no chill whatsoever.
CRAIG: He tried to lecture me on the importance of investing and tried to explain the stock market.
TWEEK: He means well.

TWEEK: Fuck– Dude?! Why’d you draw dicks all over Jimmy’s page?!
CRAIG: Because Jimmy’s a hoe. And hoes need dicks.
TWEEK: Ugh.. Jimmy’s really funny! He and Craig act like they don’t get along but we’re all friends. It’s like that whole best friend deal where you’re dicks to eachother but not for reals.

TWEEK: I added Kevin in too cause he’s been hanging out with us a lot lately!
CRAIG: Jimmy actually brought him into the group. He helped Jimmy with manual labor things around his house that kinda require the use of legs.
TWEEK: Yeah! And he’s a really cool and shy person! He made snacks for last weeks movie night and they were fucking amazing!

anonymous asked:

So Haven, there are rumors that Tom is looking for a countryside home. The English countryside is stunning. What kind of home do you think he’d want for himself? Something big and airy with lots of light? Or something quaint and private? I love that he seems to be entering a new stage in life and reaping the rewards of his hard work. A puppy and a country home! ♥️ After what he’s been through, he more than deserves it 😊

There are??? Just because he may have gotten a dog? 

The internet.  Gotta love it.  Or not.

So.

WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME THINK OF THE STUPID ANGEL FACE IN FRONT OF A TOASTY FIRE WITH A CUP OF TEA IN ONE HAND AND A BOOK IN THE OTHER WITH HIS DOGGIE CURLED UP AT HIS FEET AS HE RELAXES IN A BIG HIGH BACK COMFY CHAIR AND PERIODICALLY GAZES OUT ONE OF THE MULLIONED WINDOWS AT THE LUSH GREEN ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE AND SEES ME APPROACHING IN AN EARLY 19TH CENTURY GOWN WITH A BASKET OF FLOWERS OVER MY ARM AND A ROSY GLOW TO MY CHEEKS AND -

Oh.

Sorry.

I kind of blacked out there for a minute.  

Uhm.

Anyways.

Yeah, he deserves it, blah blah blah.

DID I MENTION THAT HE’S WEARING A WHITE POOFY SHIRT AND A BLUE SILK WAISTCOAT THAT I EMBROIDERED FOR HIM AS A WEDDING PRESENT

Admitting that someone abused you is not easy. 

Especially if you have a masters degree and watched the Burning Bed multiple times as a child. Your mother taught you better and when you are sitting in the bedroom with blood running down your face and cracked ribs - it seems surreal. You tell yourself you will act better next time- so it will not happen again. 

But it does and you live in shame.

1. You wear sweaters when it 90 degrees outside, to cover your bruises.

2. You lie to your friends about canceling engagements.

3. You call into work sick. Usually on Monday mornings because you were beaten all weekend.

4. Weekends are usually not happy. They are home more. This means more time for arguments.

5. You lie to your family.

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8/10 recs

1. puppy love by minsyah || Rated T, 15.7k

Vicchan has a crush on their neighbor across the balcony, and so does his owner.

Yuuri, certified Dog-Dad™, will do anything for his beloved poodle—even if that means constantly embarrassing himself in front of his devastatingly attractive neighbor.

  • A full meal of comedy, romance, and wonderful encounters, this au is pretty simple and executed excellently. Victor and Yuuri are neighbors, and the author uses this setting to its maximum potential. I fund myself smiling throughout reading this. so it’s a definite recommend.

2. Just A Little Bit by astelso || Rated T, 13.1k (WIP)

All Yuuri wants is to become a professional ice skater, he doesn’t have time for any distractions. Especially not heavily accented distractions. Especially not hot, Russian, much-older-than-he-is, (possibly a serial killer?) distractions. No way.

Or

The Katsuki’s are a very loving family so it’s no surprise that they try to adopt their sad next-door neighbour, much to Yuuri’s chagrin. How is he supposed to get over his stupid crush if the guy is at his dinner table practically every night?

  • A fic going in a direction I don’t know what to make of yet, but it’s interesting and has my attention. Victor moves to Hasetsu when Yuuri is young, and I’m kind of alive for the idea of him and Mari being best friends. 

3. Heel Sit Stay by neck_romancer

Yuuri gave up a skating career to care for his ailing dog four years ago. Now he’s at the 2016 World Dog Show in Moscow, his faithful partner Vicchan in perfect health. They’re athletes of a different sport now–doggy agility–and they’ve come to defend their titles as reigning champions. For Yuuri, though, it was just a nice way to pass the time. Nothing truly nerve-wracking ever happened at these dog shows.

He really should have realized that there was a high chance he’d run into a certain Russian dog lover.

  • !!! Cute! The author knows their stuff, and the meet-cute is pretty organic. Victor and Yuuri feel true to their characters, and Vicchan and Makkachin take starring roles in this fuic, so what’s there not to like? This is a wonderful dog show au, it’s just really, really freaking cute.
Stealing a dog AU - Wolfstar

Based on this prompt: 

“Did you just steal a dog?”

“It wasn’t happy.”

***********************************************************************************************

  • Honestly Remus should have expected it. Sirius had all the signs. It all started last week.
  • Him and his boyfriend were walking along some road, just enjoying the spring sun and getting to know about their new neighborhood.
  • It was when he was turning to glance at Sirius, that he realized that his boyfriend was had stopped walking some moments back and was now sitting on the pavement petting some random dog.
  • It was a well-known thing that Sirius was a dog person. In fact, during their years in their boarding school, James (one their best mates and who was currently dating Sirius’ brother. So literally, he was family now) said that Sirius was like a puppy: always craving physical contacts, always seeking attention and mastering the puppy eyes and being the best at it (just before Regulus).
  • Remus would be lying if he said that his heart did not melt at least a little (that is, his heart turned into a puddle straight away) at the sight. Sirius smiling like a child whose Christmas came earlier than usual, cooing sweet words to the dog and just looking all cute.
  • The dog itself was really beautiful. It was a small black puppy, nuzzling Sirius and bathing in the attention.
  • Making the few steps to meet his boyfriend, he sat down on the pavement, ruffling the puppy’s head and earning a lick.
  • He chuckled slightly and looked back at Sirius. “Don’t you dare thinking about bring it back home. He probably has a master so-”
  • He didn’t have time to complete his sentence that some bloke, with a slight nasal voice came out of the house nearby and shouted: “OI! What do you think you’re doing? That’s my dog!”
  • “Oh I’m sorry. It’s just that he was so cute and ca-”
  • “Whatever! I don’t care. It’s going to the shelter at the end of the week. I don’t need some poofters touching that thing. It’ll be hard enough to to give it away.” On that the guy picked up the dog and went away.
  • Remus was dumbfounded. He hadn’t expected that. Sirius, on his side, was fuming. He seemed ready to have at least a small talk with that asshole.
  • He grabbed Sirius’ hand to calm him. “Leave it love. It’s not worth it.” Sirius seemed like he was about to protest but finally just slumped on himself.
  • The two of them made their way back to their flat. Neither saying much on their way.
  • Back on their flat, they found James and Regulus cuddling on their couch. They weren’t really surprised, they had given the couple a key the very next day after buying it.
  • Sirius gasped loudly. “My brothers snogging! Oooh Moony save me from this sight.” He pressed his head into Remus neck and began to mutter loudly about traitors.
  • All of them rolled their eyes. He’s being doing this act since they were doing their A-levels: 4 years back. Needless say, the act was getting old.
  • “Sirius could you not please. And why don’t do tell them about our day while I make tea?”
  • *****************************************************************************************

One week later.

  • Remus was dragging his feet over the three flight of stairs after one long day of work.
  • Standing outside the flat, he froze. He could hear some barking and some voices cooing.
  • No. That couldn’t be true. Sirius wouldn’t dare.
  • He dared.
  • Coming inside he took in  the sight in front of him. James and Sirius was sitting on the floor, with their legs spread wide, with huge dopey grins on their faces. Regulus was sitting on the couch, trying to look like he didn’t like the puppy.
  • He was failing miserably with his grin on his face and his eyes repeatedly glancing at the dog and his boyfriend.
  • Raising his eyes, Sirius noticed Remus. He stilled and apparently decided to play it nonchalantly. Raising and picking the puppy with him, he pecked Remus lightly on the lips.
  • “Oh you’re home, love.” He rose the dog at eye-level, who gladly started to lick Remus on the cheek and nuzzling him. “Meet Padfoot”
  • “Did you steal a dog?” Remus asked deadpan. And believe me when I say it was hard to keep his face blank when all he wanted was grabbing the puppy and kissing and petting it.
  • “It wasn’t happy.” Sirius answered earnestly. “James and I were in the neighborhood and saw it. We didn’t have any choice when it started nuzzling us.”
  • He had his puppy eyes now. “Please can we keep it. Please?”
  • Remus rolled his eyes but nodded. Honestly how could he say no? With the puppy - Padfoot being his cute self and Sirius looking at him like that?
  • In his end, it was Remus who petted the dog most. He even gave it a place on their bed (Sirius grumbled loudly at that. He wanted a cuddle that night and it was Padfoot who got it. But how could he complain when his boyfriend was looking all cute and sweet?) 
Coffee Shop Rescue IV

Pairing: Peter Parker x Female Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1340

Summary: You’re enjoying your time with Peter, and start making connections. (I’m so so sorry this has taken so long. I just graduated college and had to move and I’m working on finding a job, and I got a one week job at a summer camp, and I got rear-ended, and yeah, life has been hectic, but I’ve missed this story so much! And mostly I miss you all! But I also wrote myself into a corner that I just figured out how to get out of, so here it goes…)

CSR Masterlist


You learned a lot about Peter over the following weeks. He was right - he was a nerd, absolutely, but so were you, just about different things. He knew photography and science, you knew literature and grammar. The common ground came to movies and tv shows, which you were both pleased to find out you had a lot in common on that front. You were more into Star Wars while he preferred Star Trek, and he liked Narnia to your Lord of the Rings, but you both loved Harry Potter possibly more than should be considered reasonable (and were both able to realize that Snape is a controversial character but not exactly a good one, which was the most important thing in regards to that fandom). You could debate the two for hours - and had - without actually getting angry at each other.

T.V. was a little different, neither of you had much to get heavily involved in shows, but you were still clinging to the ones you’d had time for in college. Peter, on the other hand, tended to jump between shows sporadically.

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hm030900  asked:

Idk if this is kind of a stupid question haha, but I genuinely can't find an answer. We are getting another dog soon, a puppy, and I know until they've had their complete set of shots they aren't supposed to be set down on the ground and the like, but I've also heard that that's pretty much the critical window for socialization and I don't want to stunt her lol. I take my other dog with my pretty much everywhere, so I was planning on doing the same and just carrying the puppy so she could 1/2

get used to lots of sights and sounds and such (especially because we live right near downtown). My question is, would it be bad to set her down to go to the bathroom? Obviously not in any dog heavy areas, but like in general? Or is there a risk that she could catch something? Or should we not even take her out? She’s already enrolled into a puppy kindergarten class so it wouldn’t be like her only socialization experience.

The main thing you’re going to be worried about your puppy avoiding is parvo - a really nasty virus with a super-low survival rate. Your puppy will get three stages of shots to inoculate against it, which is why they tell you to not take her out until they’re done. Parvo is shed by dogs who have it for a couple weeks after symptoms disappear, takes a while to die (sunlight can kill it in a few months but indoors it can live up to a year), and is easily tracked around. 

So you don’t want to avoid socialization but you do need to be careful where your puppy goes - no pet stores, high-traffic areas, or dog parks. Carrying her is a good idea, but also setting up socialization experiences in safe places, like playdates in a backyard where they can guarantee no parvo dogs have gone recently. 

Also, be careful about taking your puppy everywhere - you don’t want to overwhelm it during the socialization period, either.