my cousin made it

10

“You’re going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well.”

8

favorite actors 2/? | Ewan McGregor

Women are always expected to be naked. I like to try and be naked in films, and have the woman not be naked. It’s a feminist thing that I do.

Gift giving

My aunt’s husband is a total fucking dickhead.

For some background, my mother’s family is Guyanese and mixed with Scottish, German and Amerindian, but mainly look black. My mother married a white Irish man (my dad) and I came out looking super duper pale with blue eyes and blonde hair. My brothers are both much darker because being biracial means getting a grabbag of genes.

My aunt (my mother’s sister) married a Nigerian immigrant who is lazy and racist. He came over for a PhD course (which he only passed because my aunt wrote his thesis and in the thirty years since has refused to work) and his distaste at being married into the same family as a white guy has manifested in a number of ways, from telling others that my dad has shouted racial abuse at him (witnesses confirmed he absolutely did not) to refusing to even speak to me because of my skin colour.

A few years ago he was shouting about something completely false and when I told him he was wrong, he tried to physically attack me for being ‘disrespectful’ and had to be held back by my dad and uncles. He was in his fifties and I was a sixteen year old girl.

I later heard from my grandfather that after he yelled at my aunt’s husband, he (aunt’s husband) said that if he faced any consequences (like being banned from family dinners or told off again for his treatment of me) he would take my cousins, leave my aunt and go back to Nigeria.

It’s been a few years since then. I’m an adult now, and I’ve steered clear of as many holidays as possible. I didn’t want my grandfather to have to choose between protecting me and seeing my cousins again. My grandfather made it clear he was on my side and would’ve physically removed the asshole from his home, but, of course, that would result in probably never seeing my cousins again. I didnt want him to make that choice.

My grandfather died this year. It was a pretty awful illness and I spent most of my time out of work inside of the hospital with him. My dad was there too - his father-in-law was the closest he had to a father. My grandfather taught me many things. Including that you shouldn’t allow people to ruin things for you. Things like family gatherings.

Now the thing about this dude is, on top of being lazy as shit, he’s super entitled. He fully believes that he is head of the family, despite everyone hating him and ignoring him. He believes he is owed deference and respect from all. He told my aunt that since I didn’t show him respect, she and my cousins were no longer to buy my xmas presents. I haven’t received a single one from them in years. So I set my plan into motion.

I don’t get paid a lot, but I saved from October onwards. I filled the tree in my grandfather’s old house with presents, one for every person in my family - bar one.

This morning, Christmas Day, I stood under that tree with my gifts in my arms and I gave every person there a present I had spent hours picking out. I went up to each individual, passing him several times while he looked at the gifts greedily, and handed everyone something they would’ve wanted. I got to drink in the look of guilt on the faces of my cousins and my aunt as I received one solitary present (from my mother’s brother) as they received a bunch from me. It was delicious.

Finally, there was one gift left under the tree - a single envelope. It said 'for all your help looking after grandfather’. I handed it to him. Inside were return Eurostar tickets to Paris for a long weekend. “Oh!” I said. “I’ve made a mistake! That’s my extra present to [Dad]!” And indeed, there was my father’s name on the tickets. He got to see every wonderful gift I got everyone else while he received nothing - nothing from me, nothing from my brothers who hate how he treats me, nothing from my uncles who hate him and only ever gave him things because my grandfather wanted to keep the peace to continue seeing his grandkids.

The cherry on top? I received a special gift from a friend today. He bought two square feet of land for me and an aristocratic title. I am now a Lady and even though it barely means anything, my family has been pretend bowing and scraping to me while ignoring him and his demands for respect and he’s now sulking and refusing to speak to anyone.

Merry fucking Christmas, Tony.

I was right in that comment I made

My policeman cousin did so enjoy finding out that there is an entire tag on tumblr with traceable IP adresses dedicated to idiots bragging about what they stole and where they stole it from.

You see the thing with cops is when you steal necessities like food and water (even feminine hygiene products when they are truly needed) they tend to let you off with a warning and even find ways to try and help your situation.

If you are just some brat who steals tons of makeup, clothes, luxery items, etc they have no sympathy. Usually they when they receive calls about stolen inventory they even check social media to see if someone is dumb enough to post it and see if the items match up. Now that he and several co-workers know about it, they will be delighted to have this entire section of tumblr to match items up with, in our city at least.

Remember kids, there is no such thing as a victimless crime.

Have fun shoplifters.

UPDATE: 4 arrests made. All of them teenage girls who were NOT stealing needed or reasonable items, but teenage girls who WERE stealing: High-end clothing, expensive makeup, phone cases, designer shoes, and lingerie. Now for all of you shoplifters in the comments who are sitting there screaming how terrible I am, like you’re not the ones who steal and lie to get what you want, do these sound like necessities to you? Cause they don’t to me. “I steal them to sell them so I can pay for…” Doesn’t make it any better. In fact it makes the charges you face when you get caught worse. Seriously it’s as easy as not stealing shit when you walk in a store.
Gift giving

My aunt’s husband is a total fucking dickhead.

For some background, my mother’s family is Guyanese and mixed with Scottish, German and Amerindian, but mainly look black. My mother married a white Irish man (my dad) and I came out looking super duper pale with blue eyes and blonde hair. My brothers are both much darker because being biracial means getting a grabbag of genes.

My aunt (my mother’s sister) married a Nigerian immigrant who is lazy and racist. He came over for a PhD course (which he only passed because my aunt wrote his thesis and in the thirty years since has refused to work) and his distaste at being married into the same family as a white guy has manifested in a number of ways, from telling others that my dad has shouted racial abuse at him (witnesses confirmed he absolutely did not) to refusing to even speak to me because of my skin colour.

A few years ago he was shouting about something completely false and when I told him he was wrong, he tried to physically attack me for being ‘disrespectful’ and had to be held back by my dad and uncles. He was in his fifties and I was a sixteen year old girl.

I later heard from my grandfather that after he yelled at my aunt’s husband, he (aunt’s husband) said that if he faced any consequences (like being banned from family dinners or told off again for his treatment of me) he would take my cousins, leave my aunt and go back to Nigeria.

It’s been a few years since then. I’m an adult now, and I’ve steered clear of as many holidays as possible. I didn’t want my grandfather to have to choose between protecting me and seeing my cousins again. My grandfather made it clear he was on my side and would’ve physically removed the asshole from his home, but, of course, that would result in probably never seeing my cousins again. I didnt want him to make that choice.

My grandfather died this year. It was a pretty awful illness and I spent most of my time out of work inside of the hospital with him. My dad was there too - his father-in-law was the closest he had to a father. My grandfather taught me many things. Including that you shouldn’t allow people to ruin things for you. Things like family gatherings.

Now the thing about this dude is, on top of being lazy as shit, he’s super entitled. He fully believes that he is head of the family, despite everyone hating him and ignoring him. He believes he is owed deference and respect from all. He told my aunt that since I didn’t show him respect, she and my cousins were no longer to buy my xmas presents. I haven’t received a single one from them in years. So I set my plan into motion.

I don’t get paid a lot, but I saved from October onwards. I filled the tree in my grandfather’s old house with presents, one for every person in my family - bar one.

This morning, Christmas Day, I stood under that tree with my gifts in my arms and I gave every person there a present I had spent hours picking out. I went up to each individual, passing him several times while he looked at the gifts greedily, and handed everyone something they would’ve wanted. I got to drink in the look of guilt on the faces of my cousins and my aunt as I received one solitary present (from my mother’s brother) as they received a bunch from me. It was delicious.

Finally, there was one gift left under the tree - a single envelope. It said 'for all your help looking after grandfather’. I handed it to him. Inside were return Eurostar tickets to Paris for a long weekend. “Oh!” I said. “I’ve made a mistake! That’s my extra present to [Dad]!” And indeed, there was my father’s name on the tickets. He got to see every wonderful gift I got everyone else while he received nothing - nothing from me, nothing from my brothers who hate how he treats me, nothing from my uncles who hate him and only ever gave him things because my grandfather wanted to keep the peace to continue seeing his grandkids.

The cherry on top? I received a special gift from a friend today. He bought two square feet of land for me and an aristocratic title. I am now a Lady and even though it barely means anything, my family has been pretend bowing and scraping to me while ignoring him and his demands for respect and he’s now sulking and refusing to speak to anyone.

Merry fucking Christmas, Tony.

Voltron’s shortie siblings!  Chilling and trading cryptid theories.  Pidge has been growing out their hair while Keith had to trim his after a literal close shave with a Galran unit’s sword.  

Dies
I r u s h e d my ass thru this
But there it be :v
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5 (final)- you’re here
Bonus
Swapfell Goth by @kazuki-draws-near
Swapfell Palette by me

1. I try to write poems
In a list sort of order
But the only one that’s ever turned out okay
Is the one about my ex-boyfriend
And that kind of sucks
So let’s try this again.

2. I still won’t know what this poem
is about even after I finish it
because my feelings are hidden behind metaphors
and finding treasure has never been one of my talents

3. I turned the girl I love into a metaphor.
Her smile is brighter than the sun
And her voice is so wonderful
That I can’t find a good metaphor to describe it.
And that sounds really cheesy
But so is this;
She is the song stuck repeating in my head
She, is someone I could find solace in
But I do not have the heart to tell her
Because I am too afraid
Of being rejected.

4. No one told me…
No one told me
That being young and naïve
Could get you so lost
Lost in another world
One where the underground rises
Where sewer rats of people
Run the businesses on the streets
Another world where darkness is obligatory
Where I will shoot the life into this hollow body of mine
Wrapping my problems in paper
And setting them alight
Pouring liquid courage down my throat
So hopefully I can tell this damn girl
That I love her as much as the bees
Because her smile is as sweet as honey
And maybe all the vices
Of this pit I call a body
Are helping me find my metaphors

5. My best friend was destroyed by her vices.
I watched her drink her body numb
Until the darkness she pushed away for so long
Finally caught up with her fragile bones.
I am afraid that I, too,
Will be caught up with someday.

6. I thought I had found my metaphors.
Thought that the only way to take apart
The puzzles I call poems
Was to destroy myself piece by piece
But doing so only made the picture
A little more muddy
A little more black
A little more…dark.

7. My vices have yet to catch up with me.
The anxiety has taken over
I no longer own my body
I traded it for a temporary solution
And it is coming back to haunt me.
My mother always told me I was naïve.
I guess that she was right.

8. The blank faces among the masses
Stare longingly at a casket
Standing underneath, a brother, a father, an uncle, a cousin.
My brother. My father. My uncle. My cousin.
I made too many left turns.
Burned too many problems
And blew away the ashes.
Drank too much liquid courage
And convinced myself that I could fly.
My vices were the end of me.
I never told the girl
With the smile as sweet as honey
That I loved her.
I just whispered it into the vast void we call space
While sipping on my lifeline.
I felt myself shatter into pieces.
The wind, blowing away my ashes.

I am 9

10. pro tip: tell that girl you love her
listen to your mother.
kiss the boy you’ve been thinking about for weeks.
shave your head.
sell your home.
buy a cat.
or a dog.
or a few.
become a vegan.
get a tattoo.
get in a fight club just because you want to know what getting your teeth kicked in feels like.
pro tip: it’s not fun.
buy a car.
travel.
sing.
dance.
become Buddhist.
come out.
the point is
life is the shortest and the longest thing we will ever experienceT
and do not waste it by caving into your vices
take risks
and be daring
or don’t
but be you and don’t let yourself hold you back
from doing so just because it’s not
“cool” or “in”
“lady like” or “manly”
fuck society, be yourself.

—  the angry list /// ryder irwin

Going to family dinners always result in me getting told it’s my turn to have a baby - because my 4 older cousins have kids - and then jokes being made that I need to find a boyfriend first.

What I don’t understand, is why is that the most accomplished I can be in life? I hate that getting married and having a baby is what me - and most all women - “have to do”. That’s what’s excepted of us from our families.

I’m only 21 and every time my family gets together, the second question they ask me is “have a boyfriend yet?” Or I’m being told “it’s almost your time to have a kid.”

I’m going away from school and paying TONS of money to get a good education, to do something I love and want to make my career, and the ONLY thing my family has ever said to me about it is “maybe now you’ll find a nice boy.”

I told my mom and grandmother the other day I don’t want a kid any time soon - maybe ever, and my nan looked like I slapped her in the face. My mom said “I’ll never be a grandmother at this rate.”

Sorry mom. My goal in life isn’t to make you a grandmother.

I’ve just been think about this a lot lately since my whole family on my moms side came for a visit. And since I’m leaving for school soon and won’t see any family members for months. And all of this makes me so mad. My older cousins wanted this. They want to work their 9-5 jobs. They want to have kids. And that’s fine. But don’t make me feel guilty for not wanting that. Don’t make me feel guilty for having other dreams.