my converses

Messages I (an INTP) have sent to people
  • “This is a weird request but can I borrow your kitchen tap? There’s nothing wrong with mine but it’s quite urgent I’m dying.”

  • “I need you to do me a favour. In my room on the side of my desk behind the wooden writing thingy there is a shiny white purse with butterflies on it. I need you to snapchat me the coins that are in there.”

  • “Can we open a cat sanctuary but like not let anyone else in”

  • “I’ve decided I’m going to marry the CEO of Pandora please help me plan his murder”

  • “In my defence I did not foresee having this much of a social life”

  • “I have a very serious task for you involving fire”

No one and nothing was harmed as a result of these messages

America: So.. I was reading about how alcoholics can be found in like, everyone’s lives. It’s a common issue, ya know

Canada: Oh yeah, I bet we can even name some people in this room.


England: Why are all of you looking at me?! 

Prussia: And me! What are you trying to say?

England: What the hell?

Prussia: Hey, do you want to go to the pub after this? Talk about this bullshit?

England: Yes. Actually. I do. 

  • Person A: Are you a top or a bottom?
  • Person B: I don't have a bunkbed

@new d&d players and dungeon masters starting because of critical role, aquisitions inc, the adventure zone, etc: 

hey listen. i know it’s really super easy to compare and set up expectations that your game, your DMing or your roleplaying should be like theirs. i know. it’s super easy to look at matthew mercer and feel like you’ll never be as entertaining as him or you’ll never be as good at roleplaying as the cast, or that you’ll never be as funny as the mcelroys.

but listen to me. i’m serious. they are professionals, but they’re playing with their friends. every single person brings something unique and great to a tabletop game, and if you let go of the expectation that everything needs to be perfect, everything needs to be like the podcasts you listen to or the shows you watch–

it WILL be perfect. d&d is a game where you can do whatever the fuck you want and you should do that, but realize that with these expectations are unfair to your fellow players, your dm, and most importantly yourself. sometimes it takes a while for people to get comfortable with how things are. sometimes it doesn’t. that’s ok. just enjoy your game as much as you can