My depression sometimes feels like it is physically crushing me, and meditation can put things in perspective but it doesn't stop the horrible feelings. I'm trying to accept my feelings, but because of them I can't do any work and I've got exams soon. I feel like I can never be at peace because my brain will always see the futility in everything. Is there any hope to help myself or shall I just tell my parents, get properly diagnosed and end up becoming reliant on medicine?
Depression is not a stigma; it’s not an uncommon neurological experience. For some, it is transient. For others, it is a life-long condition.
The fact that your depression is interfering with your ability to function and fulfill your scholastic responsibilities says to me that you should see a doctor.
Meditation, certain activities like art, and therapy are all excellent ways to manage your experience of depression. However, medication is a perfectly acceptable route to take as well.
It may just be that this is a time in your life in which medication would serve a useful purpose. School can be hard, especially when we are still trying to find our place in human life. Don’t overthink it, just be willing to adapt.
Going on medication now doesn’t mean you’ll always be on it. That’s a decision between you and your doctor. But don’t try to do this yourself. This is a health condition and you already have a lot on your plate. Outsourcing your intelligence by seeking help is the smart thing to do, and something people rarely understand.
If you really want to solve a problem, you will try out all possible ways. So talk to your parents, see a doctor, and take it from there. If you need any assurance along the way, feel free to reach out to me. This is all the stuff I’m studying in medical school right now anyway and I’m more than happy to chat.
Keep up with the meditation. As you said, it helps keep things in perspective. It may not change the feelings but it will change the way you relate to those feelings and in doing so provide some degree of relief.
Namaste my friend. Much love.