mustachenation

okay hear me out: 

you know those photo series that are like “In The Running For The Next Spiderman/Young Han Solo/Bachelor/Prince Eric/Property Brother”

and it’s just like nine generically handsome brunet white men that might all be Henry Cavill or might all be Matt Bomer or might all be the photogenic runner guy from 2012 for all we know but it’s impossible to tell because they are just so generic?

and you know how nobody really remembers what Moist von Lipwig (slash Albert Spangler where applicable) actually looks like, they just remember the gold hat, or the glasses, or the bountiful ear hair?

what I want is an adaptation where Moist, whenever he’s being an anonymous face or The Man in the Golden Suit or Albert Spangler, is played by a series of generically handsome brunet white men who are swapped out shot-to-shot.

ok so, moist is my favorite discworld character. i love the guy, he’s just swell.

thing is, i’m not a native english speaker. even though i know and understand that ‘moist von lipwig’ is probably the weirdest name ever conceived, i just don’t fully get the full effect.

but today i checked to see what he’s called in the spanish version, and lemme tell you, seeing 'húmedo von mustachen’ has taken like 15 years of my life and now i want to die.