this has a lot of implications…it implies that Keith knew that he was going to be talking about some emotional stuff before doing the vlog. And what is the vlog for anyway? Did Coran tell them it was a diary of sorts? Did he tell the paladins to just talk about themselves? If the latter is the case, then this video is very telling of how Keith views himself, and what aspects he believe’s defines him. Most people when told to introduce themselves, they talk about things that they think defines them. And these are usually things like interests, hobbies, views, etc. But Keith doesn’t talk about any interests or hobbies. He says he pilots the black lion and he’s a paladin of Voltron, but that’s not necessarily an interest, even though he’s extremely dedicated to the cause. Instead the most he talks about are his flaws and abandonment issues. It’s very likely that Coran told all the paladins to make at least one vlog entry for future generations. Keith was probably like “But what should I say?” and Coran was probably like “Just tell them about yourself.” and what Keith decided what was most important to tell about himself was that he pilots the black lion, he’s a paladin of Voltron. He has trouble connecting with people, he has a temper, and he thinks it’s because his mom abandoned him and that he pushes people away so that they don’t reject him. These are the things that Keith thinks defines him. And he was obviously prepared beforehand to talk about these things, promising himself that he wouldn’t cry.
okay so i fucking hate myself but here we go!! disclaimer: this is purely crack and entirely because i accidentally told @softjimon about this au as a joke and then couldn’t stop talking about it and now IT FUCKING EXISTS SO:
so jace is like….a table
to clarify, it’s not that he has similar qualities to a table. it’s that he literally shapeshifts into a table.
he’s a…were-table, for lack of a better word.
okay, okay, if we wanna get more elegant about it, you can say that jace has a superpower or something where he can manifest his energy into whatever he desires, but because of some mental struggles he has he’s stalled at table.
so whenever he gets frustrated or scared or angry, he turns into a table.
god, i can’t believe i’m still writing this
anyway one day jace goes to the local thrift store to see if he can find any novelty mugs, because they always have a strange collection there.
he’s rocking back and forth on his feet, trying to talk himself out of buying the mug with a cat crawling along it’s handle - does he need it, even though it’s absolutely the cutest fucking thing he’s ever seen? - when the hot dude from his formal composition class walks into the store.
jace just fucking panics because he may or may not have kissed the dude - simon - while he was drunk at a party last week and the thing is he likes simon, and likes the way he speaks, all animated and kind and enthusiastic, and he wants to take him on a date or something, not be the random dude who kissed him like an obnoxious frat boy.
so jace does the only logical thing he ever does when he panics, which is, you know, turning into a fucking table.
i hope you can guess what happens next
simon thinks “what a neat table!” and buys himself a coffee table for the room he rents from magnus!! since there’s no price tag on the “table”, the store owner, who’s completely mystified, agrees to give it to him for nearly free!! what a fucking steal!!
now jace-the-table is in simon’s room!!! jace is a table, so he can’t express emotion that well, but if he were in human form he would be screaming right about now.
but he’s a table so he sits quietly as simon putters around his room and rearranges stuff to make room for his new table, and then halfway through he gets a call from clary and throws himself on the bed to chat with his best friend.
there’s just a lot of “hmm” and “uh-huh” and “i know, clary” until simon suddenly groans.
“no, he didn’t - i haven’t talked to him yet…i thought i saw him today at the store but i think i was hallucinating…yes i know he kissed me but what if it was an accident? i like jace, i don’t want him to think i’m desperate - shut up, fray, it doesn’t matter if i am desperate - “
jace-the-table feels like he’s in the middle of a fucking dream.
simon likes him!! simon!! likes him!!
in the middle of all of this magnus walks into the room and freezes when he catches sight of the table.
“what is that?” he asks simon flatly.
simon hangs up on clary and stares at magnus in confusion. “a table?” he says slowly, like magnus has lost his mind.
because magnus still has magic in this universe, so he shakes his head very slowly and says “no, it is not” and waves his hand, and jace turns back into a human.
(a very naked human, which is new because usually he can do this with his clothes on)
simon almost goes into shock right there
“i don’t want to know.” magnus says as he backs out of the room. “i literally never want to know.”
it turns out that magnus eventually has to know, because jace and simon have a long talk and then go on that first date they both wanted so badly, and then they go on a lot more dates, and then they just never stop going on dates, because they’re in love.
Newsomberg Facts - Anniversary Special #5: Andy wore a suit by David Hart, the designer of the green tux he wore when he hosted the Independent Spirit Awards. Joanna collaborated with Zac Posen in the design of her wedding dress. No pictures were ever released but judging by what a gorgeous bridesmaid she made at a friend’s wedding, it’s safe to assume that she would have looked magnificent.
Stiles leaves the jeep approaching to Lydia waiting for the shooting to end and when it happens he turns to her and begins to examine it from top to bottom. “Are you okay?” He asks and Lydia nods. Stiles approaches to embrace her with relief but it leaves immediately giving an accusing glance. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me anything about this. Not a word, not a single word”
guys i think im seriously experiencing a mandala effect moment here because i……really literally remember vanessa winning bb17????? i really….i really really remember that happening……??????????????? what?????????? im not even a stan like… i dont even remember liking her but i dont remember….i literally thought she won this entire time until just now..? what………