muslim women will not change for you

anonymous asked:

how cool is the american military with trans people enlisting? with or without transition surgery?

Can’t think of a better day to post this than on the Transgender Day of Visibility. I’m not apologizing for the political leaning in this post either.

Up until very recently, not very cool at all. It used to be an automatic DQ from enlisting because it was considered a mental illness. Which is weird because even though you couldn’t be trans while serving, you could receive HRT and such from the VA after being discharged. So, like…I dunno what the disconnect was there. 

However, the military is now open to transgender service members as of July 2015, although at this point in time they only acknowledge binary genders. 

You can read the DoD Commander’s Handbook for Transgender Policy Implementation here. It makes clear that members are treated like and held to the standard of their gender and that allowing service members to transition is a medical necessity. It also makes clear that discrimination of trans soldiers is unacceptable and grounds for an EO (equal opportunity) complaint. It’s not…perfect, (they use “preferred gender” constantly and only acknowledge the soldier’s gender when their marker is officially changed) but it’s a start. As far as I know the army only covers HRT and cosmetic surgeries like facial hair removal, not bottom surgery.

Presently, the military is only focusing on service members who are currently enlisted. Army Staff Sergeant Patricia King is considered the first open transgender soldier, and she’s had an outstanding service record with numerous awards. Her chain of command was supportive when she came out to them, even though she came out before the official decision to allow transgender soldiers.
As for the future, the timeline of implementing trans service members actually annotated that they would begin accepting transgender recruits this July, so we’ll see how that goes. 

If you want a character in your story to be transgender and serving, they would probably either have to be 
1) Serving after July 1st 2017, when all cards are down and trans people in the military are officially “a thing.”
2) Out after 2014, when the federal government made it much, much harder to discharge a service member just for being transgender. 

It goes without saying that there has been no shortage of backlash for this decision. They call this a decision a “civil rights ploy” and that it results in a “weaker, compromised military,” despite the thousands of closeted soldiers already serving. I got out before the decision was made so I can’t speak firsthand about the current climate, but I’m willing to place a pretty sizable bet that a lot of the soldiers in the army weren’t thrilled either. Transphobic jokes were not remotely in short supply in my old unit.

Still, commanders have been implementing these policies and soldiers are now having classes teaching them about trans issues, and medical providers are also receiving classes for their transgender patients, so again, it’s a start. There’s even guidelines about what kind of language is acceptable to use.

We’re not out of the weeds yet, however. Politicians continue to demand that the policies are reversed, now more than ever since that the power has shifted, so it’s important to continue making your voice heard. Be vocal about allowing transgender service members to join and serve safely, especially if you or someone you know is a veteran. The opposition claims that service members aren’t fighting this change because they feel like their hands are tied by an oppressive system, and people need to know that service members aren’t fighting this change because they support the change. If you can, write letters (handwritten letters if possible; you’d be surprised the effect that has) to your representatives, your Senators, governors. Let them know that you support lifting the ban, or at the very least that you’re not opposed to it.

Just remember that this is nothing new. The same people kick up the same dust every time the military decides to be less discriminatory, whether that includes allowing POC to serve, (somehow we’re still arguing whether to allow Muslims) allowing women to serve, (and women were only just allowed to apply for combat MOSs last year, and make no mistake there’s still debate about that) allowing LGB people to serve, (still debate, no mistake) and now allowing binary transgender people to serve. Every time the military cracks its door open a little bit, the country thinks it’s going to simply fall apart.

So far it hasn’t. Army of One, yo. My army is your army.


Was this post informative? Entertaining? Eye-opening? Then consider supporting SPC Kingsley on Patreon!

anonymous asked:

muslim trans person over here!! to the person worried abt changing their hijab in front of trans women, in my opinion (having read the Quran many times and being v involved religiously) it's fine bc that person IS a woman! also, if u feel that isn't enough to make you feel comfortable, know that Allah won't blame you for showing your hair that is perceived to be all female. He is the Most Merciful after all!

this anon is really kind and sweet!!! but most of all, helpful for explaining things that i don’t have the right to explain! thank you, anon!!! <3

The safe space is dead, long live the safe space

Many people have in the past pointed out that no safe space that depends on the exclusion of people with privilege is safe. Part of the criticism has focussed on the way building a woman-only space or POC-only space or queer-only space forces people to either identify with that label or reject it completely, forcing human diversity into a binary that doesn’t fit.

But the biggest critique has focussed on how a womens safe space is only ever safe for white abled cis etc women. Because a racist women-only space is not safe, an ableist POC-only space is not safe, an islamophobic queer-only space is not safe, etc. To build a safe space this way we would need to allow only poor queer disabled muslim trans intersex women of color and absolutely no one else. That’s not going to build much of a space, is it?

And that’s before you start considering that many of us internalize and reproduce oppression and a lot of us face violence from our own communities because of it. (For a good example: see truscum)

Many spaces have responded by changing their wording to ‘safer space’ while keeping the same rules. I believe that is a cop out, people change the name instead of the space. A racist space, an ableist space, a transphobic space etc is not ‘safer’. We need something much better than that.

If we really care about the safety of everyone, not just the white cis abled people in a space, we need to find more effective means of creating safety than excluding a kind of privileged identity. That strategy is just not working. Instead, we need strategies to create safe behavior, without overusing the option of exciling people (see: disposability in social justice spaces). We need to ask every group (not just the ones we’re focussing our organization on) specifically what they need to be safer. We need to take healing and transformative justice more seriously. We need to stop asking 'who can we exclude to make this space safer?’ And instead ask the question we should also ask in our families, workplaces, schools and streets: how do we actually make this place safer?

The safe space is dead, long live the safe space

The Hijab: why it can kiss my ass

I hate it when people say that it isn’t mandatory. It’s such a bull faced lie. It’s almost like saying that you aren’t required to do homework. No you aren’t physically forced to do homework (depending on the situation) but if you want to grasp a passing grade you better do it. Even disregarding the debate on if women are required to wear it and what it is supposed to look like, the hijab innately is one of the most of not the most misogynistic symbols and degrading articles of clothing. Let’s break it down. The hijab is for modesty. Okay that’s not terrible modesty can be a good thing right? But why do women have to be modest? Well because men aren’t physically capable to control their sexual urges so if a woman shows her arms and or legs she is in danger of being sexually harassed or raped, and because women’s sex drives are practically nonexistent it is our responsibility to keep men in check. This is majorly fucked up in a plethora of ways:

- if a women is raped then she is blamed for it because of the level of modesty in her clothing constituted for her getting raped and if she just dressed more modestly it wouldn’t have happened. We see this in the adultery punishments in Islam and how much more women are punished despite her not consenting.

-women are made to wear the hijab when they hit puberty, some even younger. The message that sends is children are too sexually enticing for men. CHILDREN. ARE. TOO. SEXY. We see this with Prophet Mahamed’s 6 year old wife whom he had sex with at the age of 9. Some Muslims argue that it was a different time and fucking children was normal. Apparently things haven’t changed.

-women aren’t people anymore, they’re walking billboards advertising Islam. There is no individuality with the hijab. You are not you anymore, you are Islam. You can get lost in the crowd because you don’t look like yourself you like every other hijabi out there. Some may find pride in that. Some feel suffocated.

All in all I think that if you choose to wear the hijab that’s fine. It’s not my goal to wipe Islam off the Earth. I just think if people really got to choose what they wanted the hijab and Islam as we know it today would cease to exist.

ace community and aro community masterpost

Asexual Spectrum

How to know you are ace

Quizzes (accuracy varies/ is questionable):

Can I still be asexual/asexual spectrum if…?

Asexual spectrum:

multiple identities


Gray asexual/grey asexual/graysexual/greysexual

Other spectrum orientations (specific to one orientation)

The asexual experience/ what it’s like to be asexual or ace spectrum (examples)

relationships (for sex repulsed/ non-libidoist asexuals)

relationships (not sexrepulsed/ libidoist asexuals)

Varying attitudes toward sex:

Asexuality and race/ethnicity/location:

Religion and asexuality:

Asexuality and Mental Health   (asexuality and autism)

Asexuality and Age:  (study on the average age people begin feeling sexual attreaction)

Asexuality and Gender:

Asexuality and romantic identity:

Asexual Community

culture  (Ace Community Census 2015)  (hour long documentery, some of the definitions have changed)

history  (list of historic asexual online communities)  ( History of the Asexual Flag)  (spinster movement)

resources and projects  (Asexuality Academic Publications Masterlist)  (Portraits Collaboration Project)  (ace vendors list)   ( ace vendor submission form)  (Matthewplace series on asexuality)  (a different resource list like this one)

(promotes academic study of asexuality and has a bibliography of academic studies as well as hosted articles)


For non Aces

For Aces  (tips on being an ace activist)

General  (writing an ace character)  (writing an ace character, includes racial/ethnic intersection)


Aromantic Spectrum

How to know youre aro

can I still be aro if…?

Aromantic spectrum experiences

amatonormativity   (a lot about asexuality but there is also a lot of intersection with aromanticism)

Aromantic Spectrum  and


community resources/projects/guides

non-amatonormative relationships (mainly QPR, soft romo, and aromate- there are others though)


Both communities/ general


Allies  (benefits to learning about asexuality and aromanticism for somebody who isn’t ace or aro )

AAA (aces aros and agender peoples) spectrum(s) map–zvgsZnTw.kSegHeUoaPhE&usp=sharing

(note this will likely not open on a mobile device)


some glossary terms

other types of love


Sexual attraction:

What is sexual attraction?

The difference between Sexual attraction and Sexual desire

primary versus secondary sexual attraction and primary versus secondary desire

Romantic attraction:

sensual attraction

aesthetic attraction

Differentiating between different types of attraction

(general )   

(romantic and sexual)

(platonic and romantic)

Attraction =/= action or behavior

If it (sex) is done wholeheartedly, in a friendly and loving manner, with full desire and with the intention of reward only than one can get complete pleasure which no other thing can give.

It can only be attained by doing it in a best way. The sign of it is, after doing it every part of the body feels calm, eyes feel cool by seeing the beloved (wife), and the ears feels happiness by listening to her soft and beautiful voice, through her perfume and by touching her it feels good, and by kissing her the taste of mouth changes, likewise every part of the body feels good.

Because women (wives) are the cause of happiness of the heart that is why they are also called the reason to the happiness of the soul. Allah says “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them” [30:21]

Ibn al-Qayyim Source: Rawdhatul Muhibbīn by Ibn al-Qayyim, Page 217

anonymous asked:

Why not don't you support women rights?

I don’t need to be a feminist to support women’s rights. I support women by simply being a Muslim. The rights women have been given in islam by Allah are the most beautiful and most just ones. If I want to change the way people treat women in this world I should begin with myself. By practicing my deen more, strive to be a better knowledgeable Muslimah and then teach others the deen. Preach Islām more and then you’ll find real rights. I don’t need to pick out a topic which already has been mentioned in my religion then give it a different name whilst both have the same aim and then claim that if I don’t follow it I’m against it. No I find that ignorant and unnecessary.

daughterofthemyscira  asked:

i would like to her ur nursey family feels pls!! (i have plenty of my own & made a post but i need All the nursey content)


  • Okay, so, Nursey’s birth parents:
    • Amal Hassan Nurse      
      • born in Morocco, but spent the first ten years of her life moving all around northern Africa and the Middle East because her father worked as a security consultant and would spend a few years in various places designing systems for different companies
      • speaks both dialects of Arabic fluently, but will always prefer Moroccan, because it sounds like home to her
      • moved to the States when she was thirteen and her dad got a permanent job working for a security firm in Manhattan. Grew up in the private school system and never left
      • has a BA from NYU and a JD/PhD from Columbia. Is a senior partner in an NYC firm specializing in foreign and comparative law. smarter than all of us.

Keep reading

Because I am only 20, it’s hard to be a role model to so many young women. I want the best for every girl. I stay away from expressing my political views, because if I say something wrong, it’s a heavy burden on my shoulders. We’re living in such incredibly hard times right now, and it’s difficult to put my opinion out there without somebody saying something about it. But when I feel something, I really feel it.

To be able to be a part of a protest for the Muslim ban was life-changing for me. To be able to walk with the people was incredible. Nobody cares about who anybody is; nobody cares about what you’re doing, what you do, or what you look like. Everybody is marching completely for what they believe in, and we have all the same beliefs.

My sister and I started marching with all these random people. It was the most liberating feeling of all.

—  Bella Hadid on speaking up about politics and protesting against the Muslim ban

The whole premise of the argument that “Muslim feminists” are unnecessary because Islam already gave us rights is so unbelievably arrogant. Islam is perfect; we are not. We are not infallible and the fact that you think Muslim feminists are “trying to change Islam” rather than the violence and marginalisation we face in our communities shows how little you listen to the women of your ummah and how intent you are on dissipating any responsibility to be critical of the sexism ingrained into us by  a male-dominated society.

Because I am only 20, it’s hard to be a role model to so many young women. I want the best for every girl. I stay away from expressing my political views, because if I say something wrong, it’s a heavy burden on my shoulders. We’re living in such incredibly hard times right now, and it’s difficult to put my opinion out there without somebody saying something about it. But when I feel something, I really feel it.

To be able to be a part of a protest for the Muslim ban was life-changing for me. To be able to walk with the people was incredible. Nobody cares about who anybody is; nobody cares about what you’re doing, what you do, or what you look like. Everybody is marching completely for what they believe in, and we have all the same beliefs.

My sister and I started marching with all these random people. It was the most liberating feeling of all.

—  Bella about the Muslim ban

[ Muslim Women struggling with the Hijab / Modesty ]

Make the internal changes before you make the external. If you change the outside before you change the inside, you’re doing it backwards.

Some ladies get a rush of fear, guilt or excitement and make changes because of that momentary feeling - which is not a bad thing Alhamdulilah it’s still progress. But there is a difference when a change is made from fear, and when it’s made from love.

If you do something out of fear, eventually that fear will wear off and if you’ve taken three steps forward, it is too easy to take two steps back. Sometimes even three or more.

If you do something out of love of Allah, fear will follow regardless. The one who loves Allah, Knows Allah, therefore without a doubt will fear Him. So if that person takes three steps forward, when their fear wears off - their love will prevent them from taking more then one step back. Becomes Imaan does have its highs and lows. We all try, fail, walk, fall and try again.

Learn, and learn properly. Love your religion, love your God, love your prophet, and hold the religion in your heart. You will be too proud not to want to show who you are. When you’ve internalised modesty, when you’re character is more Muslim then the way you look, it becomes easy to start showing your insides on the outside.

Too many ladies cover the outside and are still acting immodestly. Too many ladies wear the Hijab but the dress code is contradicting the cloth on their head. Don’t let it just be material, let It be the tool of your self expression. Let it be one of the most powerful things you do for the sake of Allah, the way you show who you are and what is dear to your heart. Be proud to be a Muslim, be proud to be the slave of Allah Almighty.     

 5 TED Talks That Will Change The Way You Think About Feminism (From Bustle)

“Faith & Feminism” by Dr. Al Anoud Al Sharekh

“A Teen Just Trying to Figure it Out” by Tavi Gevinson

“The Dangerous Ways Ads See Women” by Jean Kilbourne

“How Islam Made Me A Feminist” by Zena Agha

“Plus-Size? More Like My Size” by Ashley Graham

Why Everyone should read the Sword of Summer

- The main character is/was homeless

- He dropped out of school

- The leading female wears a hijab

- She openly discusses how wearing a hijab is a choice

- She’s also kickass and doesn’t fall into the “Shy Quiet Muslim” stereotype

- Two other main characters are homeless

- one is deaf, and moat characters use ASL for a lot of the book

- They bring up the struggles of using ASL and being deaf without using the “Poor Disabled Person” angle

- A guy openly loves clothes without being stereotyped as gay 

- His love for clothing saves the main characters

- All the characters are badass, and none are treated as less powerful because they’re women

- The PJO and HOO references 

-Annabeth is in it

PS I’m only halfway through it, so if anything changes or if there’s anything you want to add, please do so.

Watch on

when white people change ‘black lives matter’ to 'all lives matter’


Throughout my life for as long as I can remember people have been using and abusing my free labor. At a young age folks would exchanging my labor for love or friendship or to be valued.

As I got older I didn’t think I could ask to be paid for my labor and I didn’t think anyone would pay me. At the same time I didn’t know how to say no.

I know the worth of my labor now and that’s changed how I look at my talents, content creations, art, writing, planning and research skills, and other tech skills etc.

My work is dope, and I need to recognize that.

And you should recognized the worth of your labor.
Especially to my dark skin black femmes!
To my dark skin black fat femmes!
To my dark skin black muslim fat femmes!
To my dark skin black LGBTQIA fat folks.
To my dark skin black disabled fat femmes!

A Non-Muslim Guide to Standing up to Islamophobia

You have most likely heard some type of comments regarding Muslims and Islam. Whether you know a Muslim or not, felt compelled to respond, but simply did not know what to say, you are not alone. I applaud you for taking the opportunity to find out how you can help fight Islamophobia and encourage peace in the world. This guide will help you to be an ally to the Islamic community and the basic principles can apply to the defense of all groups and help to eradicate stereotypes and discrimination.


First things first, respond with patience. While it is tempting to respond to negative statements quickly and with equal or greater negativity, don’t! You will simply be adding fuel to an already kindled fire. Instead, fight fire with water. As humans, we tend to fear the unknown. Often, hatred stems from ignorance, so be prepared to provide some information!

If the statement is vague, ask for clarification or specifics so you can better address the situation. This makes the person think about their statement and the real reason for it. Encourage dialogue and if you do not know the answer, just admit it and offer to find the answer. Text or call someone who does know the answer, or perform a Google search. While generic searches may not give you the complete answer or unbiased information, it is at least a starting point for a conversation. This can also give you an opportunity to point out errors in information.

When someone states another person should “go back where they came from,” ask if they know where that person is from. If the answer is no, suggest they may have been born here or remind the person that unless they are First Nation people, they came from immigrants too. For many, their family has been in the United States for so many generations, they have removed themselves from their immigrant ancestors.


You could go one further and ask what their issue is with either that person in particular or with immigration. Once again, remind them that outside of First Nation people, the United States was founded by people seeking freedom from tyranny and oppression. This should help put things back into perspective for many people. For some, it will not and they will be hell bent on fighting immigration.

Sometimes people are mad about immigrants “taking” jobs from U.S. citizens or jobs being moved to foreign countries. Reminding them that people living legally in the U.S. are entitled to finding a job and that job movement is the fault of the company, not its employees — this can help shift the anger to the right place.

Yes, terrorism is a problem, and phrases like “Radical Islamic Terrorists” will not help prevent people from automatically thinking of Muslims when something horrific happens.  However, terrorism is not limited to one race or nationality. Groups like the Ku Klux Klan came from a collection of like-minded individuals seeking change or resistance to change. This group evolved into a group of people with extreme ideas and actions resulting in a terrorist group.

According to, even the group’s first grand wizard, Nathan Bedford Forrest, tried to break up the group due to their extremity. Extremists come from every background, but do not define the group. Just because the Ku Klux Klan was founded in the southern United States by White military veterans, does not mean all southern White military veterans are part of the Klan or have the same ideals.


Stories of violence and harsh laws are found in the Old Testament of the Bible. The word infidel means a disbeliever and applies to anyone that does not believe, not just disbelievers of Islam. This term is not only in the Quran. The word infidel appears in the Bible in Deuteronomy 13:6 and 1 Timothy 5:8 as well as in other verses. Honestly, the beliefs of Jews, Muslims and Christians are far more similar than they are different. We share laws, prophets and the belief in God. Encouraging people to read reputable information about religious texts will help dispel false rumors.

While there are some cultures that mandate a woman to cover her body, it is not strictly a religious ruling. Islam is not alone in saying women can cover. Orthodox Jewish women adhere to the rulings found in Ketuboth 72 requiring head covering and the Bible commands women to cover their hair in 1 Corinthians 11:4-16. Many other religions and cultures observe head covering as well as some form of modest dressing. Honestly, what is wrong with covering one’s body to preserve it for their spouse and God? Would it be too bold to say many people complaining about overdressing also complain about miniskirts?

It can be very aggravating to deal with people making negative and harsh comments about Muslims, especially when there is no truth or basis for those comments. You probably will not be able to reach everyone or change everyone’s minds about Islam and Muslims, but at least you can plant a seed of information that may bloom later. Advocating and educating these people will help put an end to the senseless violence and aggression associated with Islamophobia.

How I knew Muslims owned my pussy

I thought I’d share my first experience with a Muslim man. He was magnificent. It was last year, I was waiting on a taxi at George Square in Glasgow. He approached me and told me how slutty and whore like I was dressed, grabbed my ass and told me he was taking me to an alleyway near by to show me how women like me need to be treated. He walked off and I followed, I was mesmerised and fully dominated after a few moments, this was the power he had.

A minute or so later, we were in the alley and he put me on my knees and pulled out his cock and ordered me to suck him, I did not argue, I obliged and hungrily sucked his beautiful thick cock. He started to tell me in a thick Syrian accent that he had just arrived here, been in the city for 2 days and I was the first woman he had approached. He had heard us white sluts were willing and I was proving the rumors true, he reached down and pulled my big tits out my dress and slapped him and pulled them as I sucked.

He was happy, I was doing my job, I was glad, I wanted to please him so badly. He stood me up and pressed my face to the wall, lifted my dress and ripped off my thong and slid his unprotected cock into my pussy. I was in heaven, my pussy gave way to his glorious meat and accepted him pounding and grinding his way in deeper and deeper. He had his hand round my throat, squeezing harder and harder, I did not complain I just enjoyed the sensations in my pussy growing more and more. I never knew giving in and being used like the pig and slut I am was so good. He kept going till he had filled me with cum. He ordered me to scoop some out and taste it and thank Allah for the loving gift he just gave me. It was my pleasure to allow him to please me, I know my place in life, my one job and one goal is to make myself available to please all Muslim men anytime they wish.

The more the merrier…

All white women must change thier ways, once and you will know the glory to be had as a Muslim cock slut…

anonymous asked:

The Bible also says it's ok to beat your kids with a rod.. please respect other religions. Obviously not all christians beat their kids with a rod. So don't assume all Muslim women will get acid thrown on them. Islam is a peaceful religion.

You are making the same two mistakes that all anti-Christian people make. First, any verse must be taken in context with the whole of scripture. If you are to apply a rod to any situation as a Biblical remedy, they you must apply the whole of the Bible to the situation. In general that means you can’t inflict punishment out of anger or to gain revenge, but as instruction to bring about Godly change. You can’t just use a rod to “beat your kids” because we are told specifically in Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” A willy-nilly beating would indeed exasperate. 

Secondly, the Bible is filled with colorful language to bring home a point. Proverbs especially uses this technique as it is a book of wisdom and old sayings of the Jewish people. Examples: 

Wisdom is a chain around the neck and a garland for the head.

Wisdom cries out in the street. 

We are to keep the commands in our heart. 

A gold ring in a pig”s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.

The lips of the adulterous woman drip honey.

As you can see and plainly understand the Bible in the book of Proverbs is not always a literal work but words of wisdom. Wisdom is not literally a chain, a garland or crying out in the street. Although some atheists would like it, we are not to literally cut our hearts open and place written copies of the bible in there. I doubt there was a literal problem with gold rings in pigs snouts and looking for a literal women with honey dripping off her lips would be a fruitless search. When analyzing the Bible it must be taken as a whole not as a clipped misunderstood phrase. 

I appreciate the question and would encourage more. I will always cast pearls. It is up to you whether it is to swine or not. 

If you say you support trans people, support ALL trans people.

Black trans people.
Muslim trans people.
Gender non conforming trans people.
Nonbinary trans people.
Non op trans people.
Trans people with neo pronouns.
Trans people who don’t change their name or pronouns.
Masculine and butch trans feminine people and trans women.
Feminine and femme trans masculine people and trans men.
Mentally ill trans people.
Disabled trans people.
Poor trans people.
Very young trans people.
Very old trans people.
Trans people who didn’t “always know” they were trans.
Trans students.
Trans teachers.
Trans veterans.
Trans people who don’t have the means to get a GED or college education.
Trans drop outs.
Trans immigrants.
Trans people with little to no Dysphoria.
Trans people with little to no euphoria.
Non Hetero trans people.
Ace and aro spec trans people.
Native trans people.
Nonbinary trans people who arent androgynous.
Fat trans people.
Closeted trans people.
Achillean, sapphic, and diamoric trans people.
Queer trans people.
Trans drag performers.
Trans people who don’t want HRT.
Trans people with severe allergies.
Trans people with immunity issues.
Trans otherkin.
Trans atheists and agonistic trans people.
Religious and irreligious trans people.
Trans witches.

You support ALL of us or admit that you support NONE of us.

We’re not going to be your perfect little angel and ideal of what we should be just so you can treat us like human beings.