By the time three in the afternoon rolled
around you decided he wasn’t going to remember. Furthermore, he was supposed to
be home by now and that wasn’t happening either. And as upset as that made you,
you figured you should just own it and deal with it. By letting it get to you
it would just make you upset and you didn’t need that. The important thing was
that another year had passed and you were still together. Whether he remembered
or not really didn’t matter.
It. Really. Did not. Matter.
However, you could have killed him.
Regardless, you went about your evening and
left your apartment hoping to get some dinner and something for yourself at the
store. You closed the car door and glanced at your phone one last time and
shrugged as you reversed and then drove down to the mall.
Zayn was at the studio where they were doing
the photoshoot. He kept checking his phone because you usually called him
around lunch time but today you must have been busy. He was annoyed and sad—he
was supposed to be at home with you and watching a movie but instead he got
stuck for another couple hours because no one could hold their posture or the
camera broke or the props weren’t right. It was making him mad.
He was a little worried something was wrong.
It was very unlike you to not text him.
“Zayn, you’re up again,” the director said.
He sighed, put his phone away and headed to where he was told.
The mall was crowded and you were stopped
several times for autographs and a few times for paparazzi to ask you some
questions. For the most part you ignored it and enjoyed the attention. At least
someone remembered your existence.
You were looking at earrings in the jewelry
section of the store when Louis happened by with Eleanor. “Hey lady,” Louis
smiled. “What are you doing all by yourself?” He wondered.
You shook your head and shrugged. “Just
browsing. I like this jewelry brand,” you smirked. “They’re so cute, don’t you
think?” You asked.
Eleanor nodded eagerly. “You always have
adorable jewelry,” she noted. “I’m glad I finally caught you buying some,” she
giggled. You picked up one off the rack and placed it in the small shopping bag
you wanted to take to check out. “So…is Zayn still at work? Do you guys have
anything special planned?” She asked excitedly.
You shook your head once. “Nope.” You popped
your lips together for emphasis with how done you were with the concept.
Immediately, she flushed and the smile fell from her lips.
“Shit, I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “Are you
alright?” She wondered.
You nodded. “It’s not a huge deal,” you
shrugged. “It’s just—”
“It’s just for the past three years you’ve
had some fun thing to do and you’re tired of always planning, I know I can see
it,” she said knowingly. “You should be mad, it is a big deal.”
You felt tears sting the back of your eyes
and Louis looked to see if the two of you were actually speaking real
sentences. “I’m a bit lost,” he admitted.
You couldn’t speak because your throat got
tight and you really thought about what El had said. You had planned all your
dates and always entertained. Of course you were always happy to just lay
around with Zayn and be with him, but you were tired of getting little to know
effort in return. “It’s nothing,” you said quickly and a tear escaped and you
felt horrible and crumbling all at once.
“Oh shush, no it’s not,” El said tugging you
toward her for a hug. You let a few more tears escape and she soothingly rubbed
your back. “He forgot the date,” Eleanor explained to her boyfriend.
“What’s the date?”
Eleanor sighed heavily. “It’s their
anniversary,” you could hear her eye roll.
“Oh babe, I’m sorry,” Louis said petting your
hair. “You should leave him and give him hell for it.”
“It’s fine,” you sniffed pulling away from
her. “I’m just overwhelmed with work and I wanted to spend the day with my
boyfriend but he…” you shook your head. “I’m just happy we made it another
year,” you said mustering the fakest smile the world would ever see. Eleanor
pouted and she looked at Louis.
“Why don’t you go to the stores you want and
such? I think we’re going to have to get mani-pedis for her anniversary,” she
said. Louis chuckled kissed Eleanor’s cheek and squeezed your arm before heading
“Come on buy your earrings, we need some
pampering,” she said.
When Zayn’s phone rang, he was very excited. He had arrived home and
you weren’t home and he was upset even more than he was when he simply hadn’t
talked to you all day. So when his phone buzzed, he was ready more than ever to
talk with you.
For about two seconds and then he answered to
Louis. “Hi,” he said solemnly.
“She’s at the mall with El. They’re getting
their nails done,” Louis said.
“Oh,” Zayn blinked. “Normally she leaves a
“I would imagine she wouldn’t if she was mad
“Why would she be mad at me?” Zayn scrolled
through a list of things you could be mad for and he came up short.
“I’m assuming it’s because you’ve clearly
forgotten your anniversary; that somehow even Eleanor remembered,” he
Zayn thought for a few moments and then let
out a long, annoyed groan. “I suck,” he claimed. “She must hate me.”
“I don’t think so…I just thought you should
“Yeah, alright. Thanks,” he sighed and hung
up quickly. He really didn’t understand how he could forget such an important
date. He could have kicked himself.
He didn’t know what to do or say so he went
and got flowers from a nearby shop and a card from the drugstore and just hoped
for the best. He was waiting at the kitchen table when you arrived home and you
smiled at him. “Hi, Zayn,” you said sweetly.
He shook his head. “I’m sorry.”
Immediately, you felt like you were going to
cry again. Of course, you wanted Zayn to make an effort but you felt like you
didn’t want him to at the same time and you should just be grateful he paid
attention to you. You didn’t like how any of that felt. “It’s alright,” you
shrugged. “There’s always next year.”
“Stop that. It is ridiculous that I didn’t
remember. I adore you so much and I’m an idiot. I’m sorry, I will do whatever I
can to make it up to you, but I’m so, so sorry in the meantime.”
You nodded solemnly doing everything in your
power to keep more tears from falling and you put your things away in the
bedroom. Zayn followed you and he quietly watched you put things away. When you
faced him, he was looking at you like you were some broken toy. You swallowed a
giant lump in your throat. “Can you stop looking at me like that?”
“Like what?” He asked curiously.
“Just…you look like I’m broken or about to
“Aren’t you about to cry?”
“Shut up,” you grumbled swiping your cheek
with your hand.
He came over to you and pulled you against
his chest. He squeezed you gently and you didn’t return the hug because you
were annoyed and mad. “Angel,” he murmured.
“Look, can you just not? I want to be mad
because I feel like I’m the only one that cares about this relationship
sometimes. I know you love me and all that good stuff and I’m very lucky you
do, but when you do things like this, it just makes me feel like I’m doing a
hundred percent effort and you’re barely giving me fifty.”
He nodded against you and he felt kinda sick
because he knew you were right. “You’re right,” he said easily. “I’m sorry. I’m
going to make it up to you,” he promised.
You shrugged. “It’s alright.”
“No,” he shook his head. “It’s not, baby.”
“I know,” you whispered.
“I do love you though,” he said softly.
You couldn’t help but smile. “I love you too,”
you said reaching your arms up around his back.
He let out a relieved breath and he kissed
the top of your head. He was going to make it up to you but right now he was
just going to hold you until you felt better.
You were kinda of unwell to be here
backstage. You felt like you were gonna throw up. But it was the first day of
Louis’ solo tour. You wanted to be there and be supportive, no matter how
disgusting you felt.
While he was on stage you were laying in his
dressing room watching the TV that showed the concert. You were trying not to
be sick but it was getting difficult.
“Come on,” you moaned softly. You didn’t want
to be sick. You wanted to be supportive.
Plus you hated throwing up.
You did manage to smile as Louis grinned
brightly and the camera men zoomed in on his pretty face. You got to see how
happy he was and you had never felt prouder of him. But then your stomach
twisted again and you couldn’t feel sicker. You ran to the bathroom across the
hall and you leaned over the toilet puking your guts out.
You sat there after you flushed and moaned
quietly again. You could have died right then and you would be much happier
than being this sick.
Curling in a ball on the floor you felt more
disgusting than you could have ever thought possible. Honestly, you felt
pathetic and stupid and you wanted to go home. Being supportive meant a lot to
you and Louis but you were in a lot of agony as you tried to calm your
Thankfully, you had the boys’ phone numbers
and you knew at least one of them was coming to the tour opener. Anyone here? You sent to the four of
the matter babe? Harry asked immediately.
need water and some gum. You responded before you puked
your guts out again.
Now you were shaking, getting sleepy, and you
felt like you were sweating but you were busy passing out.
You’re not sure how long you were out but
Harry was hovering over you when you came too. “Oh good,” he smirked. “Another
five minutes and I would have had to call an ambulance.”
You glared at him weakly and you took the
water from him immediately and managed to chew your gum three times before you
felt too tired again. “How’s he doing?” You wondered.
“Amazing, love,” he said simply. “Don’t worry
though. There’s plenty of other shows.”
Grumbling, you sipped some more water.
Sighing you rested your arm and then face on the toilet. You could hear the
screams and the happiness coming from the audience. You wanted to be out there
but you were in too much pain.
You heaved again and you were unsure how
there was anything left to throw up. Harry rubbed your back pulling your hair
into a pony tail. And when you finished, you sipped a bit more of water to
rinse your mouth out and promptly passed out.
“She’s been sick the whole time?” Louis asked
and you felt a gentle hand push your hair behind your ear and stroke your
cheek. “Why didn’t she just leave?”
“I don’t think she wanted to miss your show,”
Harry said softly. Louis sighed and he rubbed your shoulder gently.
“Love,” he hummed softly. “C’mon now, we’ll
head home and get you better, yeah?” He kissed your temple as he slowly lifted
you into a sitting position.
You looked up drearily and could only imagine
how disgusting you looked. “You did amazing,” you murmured exhaustedly.
“Thank you, darling,” he said and he looked
at Harry for help to scoop you off the floor without jostling your stomach
much. You could smell vomit and you imagined it was dried in your hair and you
wanted to kill yourself for being so gross. You moaned. “Alright, home we go,”
he said cradling you in his arms.
You threw up two more times that night and
Louis took all your clothes off and his so that he could rinse you off and hold
you up. He brushed your hair smooth and didn’t pull it at all because he had so
much practice with his sisters. He pulled it back loosely just as a precaution
and helped you get into sweats and one of his loosest shirts. After he had you
brush your teeth, he kissed the center of your forehead and placed you into
bed. “Thank you for being so brave while I was on stage. You made this night so
easy. I’m so in love with you.”
And here you thought you hadn’t done anything.
“Congrats Lou, I love you,” you murmured before falling asleep immediately.
Louis chuckled, settled himself in beside you
and kissed your cheek. He greatly appreciated you at all times but for you to
not complain on his big night and for you to endure the entire concert—even if
it was from the bathroom—well, Louis could not adore his sleeping beauty more
if he could try.
Two of my colleagues (in their 50s and 60s respectively) started talking today about how much they love Sign of the Times so I was telling them about the album and both of them excitedly asked me to bring it in next week so they can listen to it!
The best thing was that one of them was like “he’s really making his name as a solo star isn’t he?” and the other said “well people always talk about how rubbish One Direction are but I really like what I’ve heard of theirs and I don’t think they’re any worse than Harry”
And they asked me to make them a mix tape of my favourite 1D songs so they could get into more of their music! It was really sweet and given that I had no part in initiating the conversation it’s interesting to see how people who aren’t the public’s idea of a One Direction Fan are reacting to their solo efforts
Liam was seated away from your parents. It
wasn’t that they didn’t like him, they were just weary with him being famous
that he would be unfaithful to their darling daughter.
But Liam emphasized how important you were to
him all the time, they always doubted his ability to come through on a promise and
while they praised him for when he was there, they just wanted you to be
unbelievably happy and they were worried he would let you down.
Here he was, sitting in the back of the
audience trying not to draw attention to himself. He had told you he wasn’t
going to be able to make it because as much as he wanted to, he was pretty sure
he wouldn’t be able to get to your ceremony on time.
While you were bummed, you didn’t mind. You
knew he was busy and he would make an effort to be there if he could. You were
giving a speech though and that was sad that he wouldn’t be able to see it. You
think you were picked for him and honestly, you were more nervous than you
could ever say but you were going to be brave and do it.
As they spoke your name, you took a very deep
breath and swallowed as you walked up to the stage. Some of your friends cheered
for you and you fixed the microphone and your tassel so it wouldn’t get in the
“Hi everybody,” you chirped. “I want to
preface this speech with that I’m entirely too nervous to even be up here and
quite truthfully I wish I was back in my seat,” you smiled and blushed a bit as
everyone laughed. Liam was already beaming with pride for you.
“When I set foot on this university for the
first time I thought it was enormous and I was never going to know my way
around. In fact, I was so scared after orientation that I went home and cried
for a good hour. But I’ve grown a lot the past four years, and when I left my
dorm room a few days ago for the last time, I went home and cried for a good
hour,” again you smiled as you made everyone laugh.
Liam was a little overwhelmed in the
audience, you were doing so well and he never finished high school. Sure, he
was a millionaire, but you seemed infinitely more successful than him. And of
course, he wasn’t jealous and he knew he was successful in his own way, but
wow. He was clinging to every word you spoke in hopes he could be and look as
tremendous as you did up there giving your lovely speech.
“I’m lucky. I’ve had incredible teachers
since I started school when I was just six years old. I’ve had the most support
from my family, friends, and pretty much anyone I speak with about the future.
While my teachers have taught me a lot, there’s not one person on this earth
who can teach you more than what you can teach yourself. To the self-reflection
papers, to your diaries—we all have one, don’t lie—to quiet times at yoga, and
definitely during online classes, you learn a lot about yourself and who you
are as a university student. But that’s not where it ends because in the past
four years I’ve learned more about myself than I’d care to admit. My hope for
myself and for all of you is that when you think about all you have learned so
far in your life is that you can never stop learning about yourself.”
It was a very nice speech and Liam would
listen to it again later but right now he just wanted to surprise you and get a
picture with his lovely lady. Holding his flowers for you and keeping an eye on
your body moving forward he headed to meet your family. He was taking deep
breaths, knowing that they might not want him there since he already said he
wouldn’t be able to make it.
You were taking pictures with your friends
when you happened by and you gasped and threw yourself into his arms. “Oh my
God,” you said.
“Congrats, baby,” he said smiling brightly
and kissing your cheek. “Lovely speech.”
Your eyes welled with tears. “You…I thought—”
“I figured it was better to say I couldn’t be
here in case I couldn’t make it so you wouldn’t be disappointed in me,” he
shrugged and blushed a bit. You shook your head and smiled happily.
“I’m so happy,” you said simply.
He nodded. “Well, keep taking pictures. I’m here,”
he said with a grin.
You fanned your eyes a moment as your friends
laughed. Your family greeted Liam with surprised and happy hellos. Liam felt
kind of smug that he made it when they thought he wouldn’t be there. But this
day was about you.
Liam kept catching your gaze and you knew
that he was trying to not be distracting but you couldn’t believe he was here.
You felt smug towards your parents, telling them how much better than they
thought he was.
“Alright, Liam, your turn,” your friend said.
Liam turned to you, smiled, and wrapped his
arm around you as you proudly showed off your diploma. “You’re officially
incredibly smarter than me,” he murmured.
You giggled. “That’s okay I still can’t sing
well. I’ve still got a lot to learn.”
He chuckled tilted your chin up and kissed
you sweetly. “M’very proud of you, love,” he whispered over your cheeks.
“Why thank you Liam,” you answered happily
and you really hoped that your friends caught this sweet moment on camera. But
either way, you would have many more sweet moments and today was a surprise so
if today was just for the two of you, then so be it. Having Liam there in
person was a lot better than pictures to remember it by.
But seriously when someone says “Hey you should listen to this song, I think you’ll really like it” you totally should. Because even if you don’t like it, the song means something to them, and they care enough to share it with you.