music farmers

farmer refuted: an alternate reality

Seabury: This Congress does not speak for me

Hamilton: *throws a puppy at Seabury* mY MOTEHherfuCKIng DoGgo SPEaks MOre ELOQUnetlyy thNA THEEEEEEE

Seabury: ……..

Seabury: ………

Seabury: I pray the king shows you his mercy.

Hamilton Songs as things I've heard in Class
  • Alexander Hamilton: I'm here to fuck shit up and this time I came prepared. I have a pencil and everything.
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: There's a specific time to shut the fuck up and you don't have a watch.
  • My Shot: I'm a slut for foreshadowing.
  • The Story of Tonight: I'm not drunk, I promise.
  • Schuyler Sisters: I'm a strong and independent woman, I don't have time for anybody's shit.. well... except yours.
  • Farmer Refuted: *raises hand* Can I teach instead?
  • You'll Be Back: Yeah, but your actually wrong about everything you've said and I have notes to prove it.
  • Right Hand Man: If I robbed a bank you'd have my back right? *silence*
  • A Winter's Ball: But you do realize that all just sounds like rape?
  • Helpless: I was trying to flirt with him but then I fell down the stairs.

Now available for Print: Here

Hamilton: hey Eliza I’m going to work on my plan for Congress let me know when it’s time for Philip’s birthday

Eliza: Hamilton it’s time for Philip’s birthday

Hamilton: hold on


The Signs as Hamilton Insults
  • Aries: Turn around, bend over, I'll show you where my shoe fits!
  • Taurus: Creole bastard
  • Gemini: My dog speaks more eloquently
  • Cancer: You're mad as a hatter, son, take your medicine
  • Leo: Sit down John you FAT MOTHERFUCKER!
  • Virgo: You're father;s a scoundrel and so it seems are you
  • Libra: You're nothing without Washington by your side. Oh- daddy's calling.
  • Scorpio: I'm sorry is this not your speed?!
  • Sagittarius: And another thing, Mr. Age of Enlightenment
  • Capricorn: Useless as two shits
  • Aquarius: Smells like new money, dresses like fake royalty
  • Pisces: It's hard to listen to you with a straight face
Phone Tag
Modern Baseball
Phone Tag

Modern Baseball - Phone Tag

Some days I hear it ring
Most days I stay in bed
Maybe I’ll see you when I get home
And we’ll avoid all the things we’ve said