Someone asked me to describe home,
And I started talking about your hair color
And the sound of your voice
And the taste of your lips
And how your skin feels like
Until I realized 
They had expected to hear a place.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays @museelo It was so nice to chat with you and get to know you better. It’s been a long a while for me since I participated in a secret santa/valentine etc thingie so I was a bit rusty but I hope you enjoyed our conversations as much as I did and it wasn’t a disappointment for you. 

And here is your christmas gift, hope you like it <3

A Christmas Promise

For my dear CSSS, museelo who I have loved getting to know these last few weeks!  I hope you enjoy my present, Elo and I wish you the best Christmas ever! ENJOY!


It was a surreal moment for her.  Almost magical.  It was late Christmas Eve, the snow was falling gently outside, white flakes against the black and O Holy Night was playing softly in the background.  The fireplace was snapping and crackling pleasantly and above three stockings dangled above it, waiting to be stuffed by Santa

Emma sighed as she took in the names on the stockings: Killian, Emma, and Henry. It gave her a jolt to see them up there, reminding her that it wasn’t a dream and that she finally had the family she thought she never had. 

Growing up, Christmas was never particularly kind to her, but this first Christmas at her new place made it all worth it.  She was snuggled up on the couch with Killian, while they sipped on their hot toddies and basked in the rare quiet moment that’s been given to them. Henry had already gone up for the night and they still had to play Santa before going up themselves, but Emma was in no hurry for the night to be over.

“What’s in the concoction?” Killian asked suddenly after taking a sip.  “It’s quite good.”

Emma smiled as she took her own sip.  “Hmm…it is good, isn’t it?  It has red wine, honey, a bit of cinnamon…I found the recipe on Pintrest.”

“On what-trest?”

She chuckled softly.  “Pintrest…it’s a website I go on.”

“Ahh yes…on that flat device that opens up like a book.”

“Laptop,” she said she rested her head on his shoulder.

“So many bloody devices in this world,” he muttered into his drink.

“Give it time…you’ll be hooked on these devices before you know it.”

He frowned slightly.  “Was that a joke?”

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museelo  asked:

captain swan "Please I just… really need space right now." - aka pls write the angstiest thing you've ever written

Also requested by Anonymous.


“Please I just… really need space right now.”

As soon as the words leave her mouth she knows she’s made a mistake. 

She’d known what she was doing was hurting him as soon as it had begun but it’s these words that make it real. She was pushing him away and she wasn’t sure that he would come back this time.

His face, already drawn and haggard falls further and she’s not sure she’s ever seen him this defeated. Even when the Snow Queen had buried their little town in ice, when their only hope was to gather whatever resources they had and put up a last stand. Even then, he had been determined and strong. He had been the one to give everyone courage, to draw out the last bit of fight they had left and now, she is the one making him look this way. His shoulders are slumped, eyes red and his arms slack at his sides. He hasn’t looked at her since she had pulled away from their kiss.

She doesn’t think she can do anymore damage but she takes a step back and he winces as though she had slapped him. His eyes fixed on the ground, he nods and turns around to leave, the cracks in her heart growing with every step. The door clicks shut when he does and she finds that she can’t breathe.

It had started innocuously enough, stolen kisses and hidden smiles, slow and steady. She doesn’t remember the last time she had had steady in her life.

(She pushes Walsh away from her mind.) 

(It wasn’t real.)

But as usual, a new crisis had hit them and in the midst of the stress and the fire, words were said, promises were made. She hadn’t thought about it then, saying the things she felt in the moment when she thought she’d never have the chance to say them again. But, when the dust had settled and they’d had to adjust back into the everyday, she had realised that she couldn’t take them back.

Her old fears and anxieties had come back in a slow tide that threatened to drown her. That she would break this, that he would break her, that she would never be able to put herself back together again if he did. 

So, she had run and now all she can see is the way his smile had lit up her little corner of the world when she’d whispered her love into his kiss right before they’d gone off to fight.

She realises that she might not ever see that smile again, falls down to her knees and lets herself cry.

Who could ever love a lost girl?